Читать книгу A Father's Pledge - Eleanor Jones - Страница 15
ОглавлениеAFTER THE HEATED conversation between him and Kat, Luke kept on running until he reached his apartment. Her words rang in his ears. Says the man who abandoned his son... Truth was, she was right: he had abandoned Ben. But for her to put it so bluntly was...harsh, to say the least. Okay, so she’d apologized, but that wasn’t the point. And she was wrong about him being against her courses; this fatherhood thing was new to him, and the responsibility was overwhelming.
A hot shower and a change of clothes made Luke feel more objective about the situation. Surely there was a way to work around the issues between him and Kat. A knock on the door shook him out of his thoughts. “Kat!” he cried when he opened it. “What are you doing here?”
She stood her ground, but appeared slightly uncomfortable. “I thought I’d... I mean, I just wanted to let you know I’m moving out.”
Luke frowned. “Okay...thanks for letting me know.”
“And I wanted to talk to you about Ben. To explain myself, I suppose.”
He nodded. “Go on...”
“I believe what Ben really needs is attention, and more than anything, to know that he’s loved. I don’t have all the details about his home situation, but there’s clearly some underlying cause for his insecurity. All we can do is talk to him and make him feel wanted.”
Luke tried to be straight with her. “Look, I respect your role as Ben’s therapist, but he’s my son and I worry about him. It irritates me when you go on about love—of course I love him. But I also believe boys his age need discipline as a first priority, an awareness of what’s right and wrong and consequences for their behavior.”
The expression on her face told him she was about to make some sarcastic comment, but instead she turned a bit pink and nodded. “Okay, why don’t we just agree to disagree...again. We both want what’s best for Ben, don’t we? I can tell you that my methods are tried and tested, but you are his dad and I respect that. For now, he just needs to settle in here and feel safe. Of course he needs discipline in the long term, but if you step back a bit I think you’ll find that my nature and animal therapy really puts kids in touch with the reality of life, makes them aware of what really matters and teaches them to love unselfishly...to care.”
Despite his reservations Luke had to admit that he was touched by her intensity. “I’ll keep all that in mind.”
“No more arguments?” she said with a shy little smile that he found quite intriguing.
“No more arguments,” he agreed.
As she walked away, he couldn’t help but notice her strong, determined stride, which belied the sensitivity she’d just shown. Maybe he should sit in on her next sea-therapy session, not to be critical but to try to understand where she was coming from. And who knew; getting involved might even help to break the ice a bit with Ben.
Feeling good about his decision, Luke headed for Wayne’s office to see what jobs were on the list for today. Wayne was sitting at his computer, frowning at the screen, his graying head tipped forward in concentration. He glanced up with a smile when he heard Luke come into the office.
“Oh, good. You’re here,” he said. “I need you to put in an order at the suppliers. Just check with Gwen first to see if there’s anything she needs. After that, can you make some calls to get the best price for rebuilding the fence at the back of the grounds? It could probably do with a temporary fix, too, if you have time. And the TV in the small sitting room is on the blink.”
“Not too many problems, then,” Luke said, smiling. His job was to support Wayne in any way he could and he’d come to realize that being assistant manager at Flight meant being up for almost anything.
When Luke had arrived at Flight in his early twenties to work as a general handyman, Wayne had taken him under his wing. In fact, Luke had lived with Wayne and Mel at their house in the village for the first few weeks, until the new staff annex was ready for him to move into. Since then the couple had taken it upon themselves to watch out for him. The assistant-manager position had actually been created for him. That was why he felt so guilty about keeping Ben a secret; Wayne and Mel had never said anything, but he could see that they were disappointed in him. He intended to make it up to them by helping make Wayne’s impending birthday the best ever.
Thinking about the smart little boat tucked away in the corner of Tanners’ boatyard, Luke couldn’t help but smile as he went off to complete the day’s tasks. It was Mel’s present to Wayne, but he’d helped her find it and spruced it up with some fresh paint. She was convinced that Wayne would love it; Luke hoped she was right.
* * *
KAT SPENT THE morning with the children’s therapy group for five-year-olds. She always found it hard when children so young had problems; it just didn’t seem right. How could anyone neglect or be cruel to such little kids?
Lucy Bell was a particularly heartrending case. She’d been taken from a squat in the northwest because her mother had been too spaced out on drugs to care for her most of the time. Left to fend for herself, she’d had little communication with others, and according to her social workers, she’d lived off scraps and leftovers and was rarely washed or dressed properly. Kat worked with her most days, just trying to get her to communicate, and this morning Lucy had smiled for the first time ever when Kat walked into the room. It felt like a breakthrough.
“Hey, Lucy,” Kat called. “Want to play a question game with me and Aaron?”
Lucy looked up from the pile of colored blocks she was playing with and nodded, her big blue eyes shining. “I like Aaron,” she said.
“And he likes you, too, Lucy,” Kat told her. “We all do. Now, who wants to be first?” Aaron put up his hand. “Okay, Aaron, what’s your first question?”
Aaron looked at Lucy for a moment; he knew this game well. “Which toy do you like best?” he asked.
“I like my dolly,” Lucy said, cuddling her lifelike baby doll close against her chest.
“Your turn, Lucy,” Kat said.
Lucy frowned. “Where’s your mummy?” she asked Aaron.
“She’s in heaven with the angels,” he replied, unfazed.
“My mummy’s sick,” Lucy told him. “That’s why they’re looking after me here.”
“Let’s play building,” Aaron suggested.
“We’ll use the blocks,” Lucy responded. “Come on. We could make dolly a house.”
Watching the children interact and develop confidence and positive social skills made everything worthwhile for Kat and reconfirmed why she loved her job so much. Spending time with the kids—talking to them, playing games and encouraging them to engage in the world around them—was how she spent most of her sessions. Her goal was to get to know each of them: what they liked, what made them laugh...and what made them cry. That was the hard part. Some of the kids had had such a hard time in their short lives that it made her mess of a childhood seem almost charmed.
When the session finished and the children went off to their classroom, Kat spent a few minutes tidying up the toys. Later this afternoon she was taking the six-to-ten group, and colored blocks weren’t as useful in getting them to open up.
Before that session, she wanted to give Ben a book about the sea she’d been promising to lend him; hopefully the book would capture his imagination and give him something to talk about. In one-on-one counseling he tended to be withdrawn and sulky, which she attributed to him having seen so many well-meaning social workers and therapists over the past few months. On the other hand, he’d been full of energy during the more informal sea sessions, winding up the other kids and causing trouble, but laughing, too.
Kat’s heart ached for him. It was clear to her that Ben just didn’t know who he was. His whole life had been turned on its head, and it probably seemed like everyone he thought he could believe in had let him down. Not to mention his dad’s appearance after nine years of silence. It would be hard for Ben to learn to trust again, and building a relationship with Luke was going to take a lot of forgiveness.
She glanced at her watch; he’d be out of class any minute. Kat grabbed the book and headed over to the new, chalet-style classrooms across the grounds, arriving just as the doors burst open. A stream of children came running out, but she couldn’t see Ben. When the crowd of kids had thinned and he still hadn’t appeared, she walked up the steps and in through the half-open door. Mrs. Selby, the math teacher, was standing by her desk, her cheeks flushed with anger, while Ben glared up at her. Kat noted his closed expression, which was more concerning than a tantrum or display of anger.
“What’s the matter, Mrs. Selby?” she asked.
Chris Selby turned her attention away from the boy, bristling with indignation. “It appears that Ben does not like math and he’s flatly refused to do any work at all today. All he has done is scribble all over his textbook. I’ve told him to take his workbook with him and finish his arithmetic questions before tomorrow. You can go now, Ben.”
Ben stood still, staring into space. “I said you can go,” she repeated.
When Ben ignored her, Kat stepped in. “I can deal with this if you like, Chris. I’ve brought him a book he wanted to borrow. I’ll make sure that he does his math—don’t worry.”
“Well, if you’re sure.”
“I’m sure. You get off to your next lesson.”
After Chris left, Kat turned to Ben. “Now, what was all that about?”
“I hate math and I hate her,” he mumbled without looking up.
“Mrs. Selby just wants you to do well, Ben. And if you’re really struggling with math then perhaps I can have a chat with Mr. Ellison about getting you some extra help.”
“Don’t want extra help. Don’t want to do it at all.”
“Well, if you grow up not even knowing how to multiply and divide, you’re not going to get very far. Anyway, let’s not worry about that right now. Come on—it’s a lovely day and you have a break now, so why don’t we go out into the garden and I’ll show you the book I’ve brought.”
Ben followed Kat outside, dragging his feet.
“It’s so beautiful, isn’t it?” she said, gesturing at the smooth green lawn spread out before them like a large patch of velvet surrounded by a vivid splash of colorful blooms carefully nurtured by Ned, the groundskeeper. “Don’t you think it’s a beautiful garden?” she asked Ben.
“We used to have a nice garden,” he responded quietly.
Ben had never mentioned his life before Flight to her. Kat crafted her response carefully. “If it was as nice as this one, you must have been very lucky.”
“Granddad used to do it.” Ben’s voice sounded wobbly. “He loved gardens. I helped him.”
“Your granddad must be a very nice and very clever man.”
“He used to be,” muttered Ben, grabbing the heads of some big red flowers and ripping them off.
“Ben!” cried Kat as he threw them onto the lawn. “Don’t do that.”
Ben looked at her then took off at a run, trampling the flower beds and darting in and out of the trees. Kat followed at a distance, keeping an eye on him but letting the boy let off steam.
Kat had never heard him mention his granddad’s illness before, and his condition obviously bothered Ben much more than she’d realized. She knew Mollie had to spend all her time caring for her husband, but it was more than a lack of attention from his grandmother that seemed to be at the root of Ben’s problems.
Like a lot of troubled children, Ben was far more sensitive than he let on. He was very susceptible to nature; she’d seen it in the sea sessions and again today when he’d finally let out some of his feelings in the garden. She would have to harness that sensitivity to find out more about his situation and help him regain some kind of balance.
Eventually, Ben made his way into the main house for lunch, so Kat headed to Mike’s office, hoping to get more details about Ben’s past.
“Hi,” Mike said, glancing up from some paperwork. “I could do with a distraction.”
“Not going to give me a hard time today?” she said, smiling.
“Look,” he responded, putting down his pen, “I know you’re totally professional and I believe in you and your methods—that’s why you’re here. You have to see my point of view, though. Luke is, understandably, in a strange place right now. The son no one knew about has turned up on his doorstep and he doesn’t quite know how to deal with it. You’ll probably say that he should have been in the boy’s life from the start but—”
“Of course he should,” Kat interrupted.
Mike shook his head. “No one’s perfect. Have you always done everything right in your life?”
“No,” she admitted. “I’ve made lots of mistakes in my life already.”
“Well, there you go, then,” he said. “All I ask is that you and Luke make an effort to get along for Ben’s sake. Or at least make an effort when he’s around.”
“Ben is the one who matters in all this,” she agreed. “By the way, while we’re on the subject, do you know anything about Ben’s background, anything about his granddad’s illness, perhaps, that might help me understand him better?”
“To be honest, our information is much briefer than I’d like,” Mike said. “You know as much as I do. Mollie and Jim Jackson brought him up while his mum, Carly, went back to finish her studies. When she was killed in a car crash a few months ago, I can only presume their grief and loss turned their lives upside down. Grief can change your whole world in an instant, completely uproot your perceptions, priorities and ambitions.
“Ben must have been, or felt, neglected by his grandparents. He’d lost his mother suddenly and then he lost the attention of his grandmother. He reacted by becoming withdrawn and lashing out when he was put under pressure, according to his social worker.”
“But what about Luke?” asked Kat. “Why didn’t he step in when his ex-wife died?”
Mike shrugged. “Who knows... Maybe no one told him he had a son. Or no one told him what had happened to Carly.”
Kat shot him a skeptical look.
Mike raised his hand. “Obviously I’m biased. I’m fond of Luke, I’ve known him a long time and I trust him. What’s important now is that he and his son develop a stable relationship—for Ben’s sake. Our job is to help them.”
“And I want to, but Luke and I have such different opinions on what matters. He seems to think discipline is the key to everything, but he’s wrong. Chris tried to discipline Ben earlier in her math class, and he just retreated even deeper into his shell. Love and stability are what counts.”
“Maybe that’s just what Luke knows, or what he experienced growing up. Perhaps he had a heavily disciplined childhood. I’m not saying his approach is right or wrong, but he’s not a therapist. I’m hoping you’ll be more open to his parenting style, Kat, but you are the expert. And I support you in that. Just keep in mind that Ben is the priority.”
Kat nodded. “Do you know what’s wrong with Ben’s granddad?” she asked, changing the subject. “I have a hunch that his condition has something to do with this.”
“Well, no,” Mike admitted. “I know he’s quite unwell, but I didn’t think the reason why was an issue.”
Kat shrugged. “It may not be... It’s just something Ben said. Perhaps I could meet up with his grandmother, have an informal chat.”
“I’ll see what I can do,” Mike said. “If you promise me that you’ll make an effort with Luke.”