Читать книгу The new technology of managing your life - Елена Самсонова - Страница 2

Have you ever been in situations which (in several minutes, the next morning, in some time, etc.) make you feel embarrassed (agreeably surprised)? I think you have. I suppose, in these moments of understanding you were saying to yourself something like this:

Variant 1.

– How could I behave like that? How could I break down? Why did I shout at him (her, the parent, the child, the friend, the neighbor, the sales assistant, that person, etc.)? What has come upon me? Am I too emotional or is something wrong with me?

Variant 2.

– What happened? Why didn't I tell him/her that…? Why did I keep silent? Why did I bleat out? I should have said that! But I didn't… And now this ship has sailed!

Variant 3.

– I've been in great form today! Well done! I wish I could be in this state more often! Then I would be able to move mountains!

I could also suppose that such inner monologues take place only after everything has happened. But at that very moment it seems to you… No! You are absolutely sure that here and now you behave in the right way. There is no other way to act! And you have the right to behave like that! Or… that you can't, you are unable to behave in a different way.

What happens to you? Why do you behave and feel differently in different situations and/or with different people? Why are you so inconsistent and nonpersistent? Why can't you hold yourself together? Maybe you don't know what you want from people, life and yourself? Maybe you can't control yourself?

Maybe it is time to visit a psychologist? Or read good books, attend a training, speak to clever and wise people? Is it the right time for making your inner space more harmonious and balanced, find your integral self and stop suffering contradicting thoughts and evaluations?.. Probably it is. However…

Everything that happens to you can get a new angle on. You can look at it from the point of view of the theory of roles. You have to do it in order to understand that you are absolutely normal and sane and quite able to control all that chaos.

Here and further by the term «the theory of roles» I mean all the theoretic information which you can learn from this book. My theory of roles becomes intertwined with the classical theory of roles by G. Mead, the theory of subpersonality by Roberto Assagioli, the theory of transactional analysis by Eric Berne and the self-concept by Steve Andreas only in some terms and definitions. Everything else is the author's compilation of ideas, theories and views based on many years' consulting experience and «seasoned» with common sense. The compilation is quite functional and in many respects surprising, that's why I decided to call it the Theory of Roles by Elena Samsonova. Why not? Let it be!