Читать книгу Burning Secrets - Elizabeth Sinclair - Страница 10

How could this woman have been Paul’s girlfriend when he was already married? But before Jesse could ask, Honey and Emily had walked across the freshly mowed backyard and sat beside him and Karen beneath the old oak’s spreading limbs.

“Rose will be bringing out the food in a few minutes,” Honey announced, then turned to Jess. “Karen needs pictures of some of the sights around town. Em and I figured you could show them to her. Maybe take her up to the ice caves.” His matchmaking sisters’ smiles reflected a small degree of self-satisfaction and the bright glow of manipulation.

They both knew that the caves were miles from civilization, infrequently visited by anyone, even tourists, and the perfect place for two people who wanted to be alone. Problem was, being alone with a woman who pulled on his emotions like an expert violinist played a Stradivarius was the last thing he wanted.

Before either Karen or Jesse could comment on his sister’s suggestion, Rose called everyone to gather around and help themselves to a platter piled high with barbecued chicken, a bowl of potato salad and a rectangular pan of baked beans. The four of them rose and slowly made their way across the yard.

For the next hour, all conversation halted as everyone dug in. Jess had missed Rose’s cooking. Shortly after the main course had disappeared and the bowls and platter stood empty, Rose went back inside the house. Smiling, she re-emerged through the screen door carrying a scrumptious looking chocolate cake. She set it carefully on the picnic table and then picked up a serving knife.

“I don’t suppose anyone wants any of this.” Rose grinned at her twin granddaughters, who whooped and scampered to her side.

“Me do,” one of the girls demanded, tugging on Rose’s apron hem.

“Me some,” the other one chimed in.

Emily groaned and levered herself from the picnic table bench beside Karen. “I couldn’t wait until they could walk and talk, but I’m beginning to think temporary insanity drove me to wish for such things.” She sighed and helped Rose cut a small piece for each of the girls. “I’m glad they’ve at least gotten teeth and aren’t eating mush anymore. Now, if we could only conquer potty training.”

Laughter rippled over the group.

Rose patted her daughter-in-law’s hand. “All in good time. All in good time.”

“Hey, Jesse, have some cake. My mother makes the best chocolate cake you have ever put in your mouth.” Kat kissed Rose’s cheek and looked down at her with a cherishing grin.

Jesse glanced at mother and son. It was hard to believe they’d only just been reunited after being separated for most of Kat’s life. It certainly didn’t resemble the reunion that had taken place in this house when, at age nine and with a newly deceased mother, Jess had come here to live and had met his father and sisters for the first time.

Jesse forced a smile. “It’s a good thing someone in your family can cook, or you’d starve to death.” He looked pointedly at Emily.

“Now, that’s not true. Rose is not the only cook in the family.” Emily paused in the task of wiping chocolate frosting from her daughter’s face, then grinned up at her handsome husband. “Kat makes a really mean lasagna.” She looked at Honey, who gave her a thumbs-up, then at her brother. “And I’d appreciate it, Jesse Kingston, if you would find a topic of conversation other than my lousy cooking.”

“But you’re so cute when you’re defending yourself,” he teased back.

Karen glanced at Jesse. Verbal banter. Safe, no emotional commitment. No physical contact allowed.

She knew how that worked. She’d often seen Paul do it. If you sidetracked people long enough with inanities, they didn’t dig for the real answers. Jesse’s silence added one more missing piece to the puzzle that made up this man. She swept her mind clear of any need to finish this particular puzzle. She had no desire to get involved in any small way with another man who was unwilling to share himself.

The family crowded around the picnic table for dessert, and Karen noted that Jess positioned himself at the very end of the bench, away from the core of activity.

When one of Emily’s girls sidled up to him, he offered her some of his cake. Her sister, not to be done out of her share of Uncle Jesse’s dessert, quickly joined them.

He leaned back and studied them. “How do you tell them apart, Em?”

Karen stepped in. “It’s easy.” She turned to Emily. “May I enlighten your brother?”

Emily nodded. “Sure. Someone needs to tell him the secret. After all, they’re his nieces and he can’t go on forever calling them ‘Hey You.’”

“Cat has a brown mole on her right wrist.” Karen watched as Jesse checked it out, then smiled when he proved her right. “Casey doesn’t have one.”

“I Cat,” the little girl announced, holding up the wrong arm for proof of her identity in an attempt to relieve any doubt as to which identical twin was which. Everyone laughed.

It suddenly struck Karen how odd it was that a stranger had learned the secret of how to tell the difference between the twins and their own uncle hadn’t. What a strange man.

Detecting a slight softening of her attitude toward Paul’s friend, Karen redirected her thoughts. Jesse Kingston might hold himself aloof from the rest of the world, but he hadn’t tangled with Karen’s determination yet. She needed information, and whether Jesse liked it or not, she would pry it out of him if it was the last thing she ever did. So far, his family had shielded him from any question she might have.

However, his family would not always be around for him to hide behind.

Jesse eased the SUV around a pothole in Emily’s driveway. He checked for oncoming traffic, then swung the car onto the main road that would take them back to Bristol. Thanks to Honey backing him into a corner, when Karen’s car had refused to start, Jesse had been delegated to drive her back to the bed-and-breakfast. Short of being rude, he could do nothing except acquiesce.

With Emily’s promise to have Kat look at the car first thing in the morning then bring it to the bed-and-breakfast still ringing in their ears, they were now sitting in the front seat of Jesse’s car like two wooden soldiers, neither of them able to find words to start a conversation.

“You didn’t have to do this, you know.” Karen’s voice filled the car’s muggy interior.

“And how would you have gotten back to town?” Jess opened the vents on the AC, adjusted the temperature, then hit the switch to turn on the fan.

“I’m sure I’d have found a way.” She paused. “Kat could have taken me.”

“Kat was putting the twins to bed.” Considering Jesse had tried his best to get out of driving her, he was surprised at feeling a little put out that she didn’t want to be here anymore than he did, and that the thought of her being, even innocently, with another man bothered him—a lot. Rather than dwell on that, he asked her something that had been on his mind. “How did you know?”

Karen turned to him, her striking beauty illuminated by the dash lights. “How did I know what?”

“About the mole. Which twin was which.”

She threw her head back and laughed. The sound washed the tension of the day from him, or maybe it was the absence of the pressure he always felt around his family. His grip on the steering wheel relaxed.

“Easy. Cat told me.”

“But—”

“She may not talk well, but she can certainly make herself understood when it comes down to who’s going to take the next turn on the swing.” Karen shifted in the seat to face him. Her bent knee brushed his thigh, sending funny little prickles zipping down his leg. “When I took them to the swing, Emily said to allow Cat to go first because they made it a rule that they had to take turns. Casey had gone first last time. When we got there, I couldn’t figure out who was who. Cat enlightened me by telling me her name and showing me the mole.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Karen studying him. “I think that’s called cheating.” He cast a quick look in her direction, then returned his gaze to the safer path of the car’s headlights on the darkened road.

“If you’d made time to play with them, you’d have found out, too,” she said softly.

The statement slashed through his insides. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to get closer to his family. He just knew that when you got too close to anything, fate found a way to drive you apart again. He’d tried for years to get close to his father and in the end, the pain of not being able to had driven a wedge between them. He’d lost not only his father, but his family, as well.

Having had enough of family for one day, he shook his head. “About the sights around town…”

“Please don’t feel that you have to take me. I’ll find them on my own. I’m sure someone in town can direct me.” Karen couldn’t believe she was throwing away a golden opportunity to be alone with Jesse and finally get him to talk about Paul. She knew only that she was more aware of him now than she’d ever been of any man in her life, and she needed time to come to terms with that before jumping into an intense situation where there would be no one but them around.

“I’m glad you said that. I don’t think it would be a good move, either.”

Well, he’d jumped at that like a fish to a worm, she thought, insanely regretting she’d made it so easy for him to back out.

Having nothing to add, Karen leaned her head back against the seat. The quiet and the motion of the car lulled her into a half sleep. All that fresh air and exercise she’d had today, plus not sleeping well in a strange bed, were taking their toll.

“So, how did you like the Kingston family’s version of a backyard barbecue?”

Karen yawned, then stretched. “Well, in addition to having one of the best days I can ever remember, I got a terrific taste of rural life. For instance, I know now that I can find room for chocolate cake, even when I’m sure my stomach can’t hold another ounce of food, and that after the sun goes down the human body becomes a target for every blood-sucking insect in the world.” She absently scratched one of the insect bites on the fair skin of her inner arm.

Her profile drew his gaze. With her hair tousled by the breeze coming from the AC vent and a trace of sunburn coloring her cheeks, she took his breath away. He didn’t think anything could surpass the beauty he found in his mountains, but Karen did. And it wasn’t just surface beauty. Quickly, he averted his attention back to the road.

Despite his best efforts not to, he recalled how she’d interacted with the twins, and how he’d envied her relaxed ease with them and Danny. She’d fit in with his family like an old comfortable shoe, something he’d always longed for, but had never been able to achieve. Karen had done it in one short afternoon without even trying and had soaked every second up like a thirsty sponge. She had an ability to draw people to her like flies to honey, an inner beauty that radiated…what?

He had no idea. But whatever it was, Jesse knew that particular quality had been missing from his makeup for as long as he could remember. He just didn’t mix with people. Which was why he was better suited to the solitude of the forest. But even that had been marred now by Paul’s death

Thoughts of Paul reminded him that he had no business thinking about Karen like any other woman. She wasn’t any other woman. She’d been Paul’s girlfriend. His illicit girlfriend, he reminded himself. Had she known Paul was married? No. After having seen her genuineness today, he could not believe she would intentionally step between a man and his family.

Jesse pulled the SUV to the curb in front of the Land of Nod Bed-and-Breakfast and stopped.

“Jesse, I want to ask you something, and it may not be any of my business, but…” Karen paused and stared out the window.

“But?” He held his breath waiting for her to ask about Paul.

When she turned her face to him, shadows made it impossible for him to see her expression. “Why do you hold your family at arm’s length? I mean, they’re so warm and friendly, and you just don’t seem to even try to fit in. I never really had a family like that and…Well, I’d give just about anything to have all those loving people around me all the time.”

That was definitely not what Jess had expected. Relief took hold of him first, followed quickly by surprise, then a wave of anger at the imposition of her prying into his personal life. A product of long conditioning, his defenses rose like an invisible shield against a towering beast. “You’re right. It’s none of your business.”

She sighed and released the seat belt. Turning to him, she laid a hand on his thigh. “They want you to be part of them, part of their lives. Can’t you see that?”

Easy for her to say. His family might want him to join in now, but what about later? What about when they found out what had happened that day in the woods? How would he live with the pain of their rejection again?

He removed her hand from where it was burning into his flesh through the material of his jeans and sending strange sensations through him, tempting him to do things they’d both be sorry for come morning, forcing him to remember how very much he wanted to kiss her. “Leave it alone, Karen. It’s almost eleven o’clock. You should go inside and get some sleep.”

She pursed her lips stubbornly.

Jesse’s breath caught in his throat. What did they taste like? Were they soft, warm, moist?

“I can’t leave it alone,” she said. “I guess it’s the nurturer in me. Or maybe it’s just that I’ve always wanted what you seem to push away every chance you get. I guess I don’t understand why I see you hurting and them trying to ease that hurt, and you just won’t let them.”

His anger built, unreasonably fueling his need to kiss her. “Stay out of it,” he ground out.

She opened her mouth to speak again. He could think of only one way to silence her. The one thing that had taken over every sane thought in his head. He grabbed her, hauled her into his arms, then covered her lips with his.

At first he tried to punish her for interfering in his life, for resurrecting Paul, for making him want things he couldn’t have, but then, when her lips relaxed under his, and she showed no sign of struggle, the kiss changed. Subtly at first, then deepening by degrees. He relaxed his mouth and sent his tongue to explore the shape of her lips. Slowly, he outlined them, tasted their sweetness, learned their texture.

Then she opened her mouth to him like a baby bird waiting for sustenance. Accepting her silent invitation, his tongue snaked between her teeth. She groaned softly, and he pulled her closer, aligning her curves with the hard surface of his body.

Suddenly, she pushed him away. The handle on the driver’s door dug into his spine. Struggling to find his center of gravity, he took in large gulps of night air.

“This…is…wrong,” she said, her breathing erratic, her hair tangled invitingly around her face. She brushed it away from her eyes, then breathed deep. “We have to think about…Paul.”

Think about Paul? Hell, he’d thought of little else since the wildfire.

Before he could voice his thoughts, she’d jumped from the car, hurried up the hedge-lined walk, then disappeared into the house.

For a long time, Jesse sat there staring at the house, trying to get his emotions back in line. He couldn’t let this happen, this…whatever it was about this woman that drew him like a moth to a flame. Unlike the moth, in the end he’d wind up with more than singed wings. Karen still had strong feelings for Paul. He could hear it in her voice when she said his name. And no matter how right it had felt, kissing her could only mean trouble, and more trouble was the very last thing he needed right now.

After a few minutes had passed, he saw the light in a second-story window come on. The curtain was pulled aside and someone peered out. Quickly, the figure stepped back, then pulled the shade. That simple act made Jesse feel as if he’d just been cut out of someone else’s life.

All the way home, Jesse relived the kiss he’d shared with Karen. That common sense had prevailed pleased him. Who had taken the initiative and ended the kiss bothered the hell out of him. Hindsight was 20/20, but he should have been the one to pull back, not Karen. Far from a novice with women, he’d never experienced anything to equal that kiss before in his life, and it had shaken him right down to the soles of his feet. While he’d initiated it, she’d been as much a participant as he had—until thoughts of Paul stopped her. It annoyed him that she had even wanted to end it.

However, the effect it had and continued to have on him bothered him even more. The memory of how her mouth had felt beneath his occupied his thoughts, overriding the warning bells going off in his head and most of all making him wish for things that could never be. He kept recalling how her laughter spread warmth through him, how her smile lit up her whole face, the way her touch made his skin tingle for more, the way she fit into his family better than he ever had. Without even trying, Karen had become a part of him.

Was the woman a witch? Had she woven a spell that had them all captured in her silky web?

No more, he told himself. It couldn’t happen again. Once was an accident. Twice would be emotional suicide. Aside from her connection to Paul, getting involved with a woman from the city had to be one of the stupidest things he’d ever contemplated.

Hadn’t his father’s experience with his mother taught him anything? Sure, Karen would be happy now, when country life was all new and exciting, but what about after the shine wore off? What then? She’d be back in her little red sports car, speeding toward New York, back to the place that spelled safety and comfort for her. And where would he be? Would he turn into a bitter, resentful old man like his father? No. He refused to spend his life like Frank Kingston had—making other people pay for his disappointments and mistakes.

Despite all his arguments and common sense analogies, the fact remained that Jesse could not get Karen off his mind.

It was all a moot point anyway. He couldn’t get involved with the girlfriend of the man he’d allowed to die. But did he have to let it go that far? He was an adult, after all, not some adolescent with out-of-control hormones. All he had to do was remove the temptation.

Couldn’t he just keep her at arm’s length, control his own emotions, tell her what she wanted to know about Paul, help her get her pictures as quickly as possible, then encourage her to leave town? He realized that it was little compensation for a life, and that nothing would ever replace Paul, but how could Jesse not help her?

Still fully clothed, Karen lay across her bed. What in God’s name had she been thinking to let him kiss her? Letting him wasn’t the half of it, she corrected. How could she have responded like a twenty-dollar hooker to a man she’d just met?

Worst of all, why hadn’t she talked to him about Paul? She couldn’t have asked for a better opportunity. Yet she hadn’t taken advantage of it. When the answer—which she didn’t like at all—came, she realized it was because Jesse had pushed away all thoughts of her baby’s father.

She lay there for a long time, thinking. What was this attraction she felt for Jesse? And why was it strong enough to veer her away from her intended path? She waited, but no answers came.

Hell, she didn’t even know why she’d started the conversation about his acceptance of his family. He’d been totally right. She’d stuck her nose in where it didn’t belong. She’d get her answers about the fire and Paul’s family, then she’d be gone, and life in the sleepy little hamlet of Bristol would go on. How it went on was none of her concern.

When would she learn that there were some things that were better left alone? Like men with some big-time emotional problems, and dark cars that invited intimacy with a man she had no business even thinking about, much less kissing as if her life depended on it. Let the Kingstons exorcize their family ghosts. She had her own problems to contend with.

Resolutely, she jumped up, then went to the dresser. She extracted her nightie from the top drawer. Throwing it, her towel and a robe over her arm, she headed down the hall to the shared bathroom. Her bedside clock had read eleven o’clock. She still had time before her landlady turned off the hot water, Mildred’s way of saving on the electric bill. Putting thoughts of Jesse and their encounter aside, she concentrated on enjoying a relaxing shower and then a good night’s sleep.

Laying her nightie on the vanity and hanging her robe on the back of the door and the towel over the bar, she moved aside a shower curtain covered with all species of colorful tropical fish. She adjusted the water to the hot temperature she preferred, then stripped off her clothes and stepped under the spray.

The silky caress of the water brought to mind again the feel of Jesse’s lips on hers, the way he gently stroked her mouth, almost as if he worshipped it. Her body began to tingle anew and not from the hot water. Slowly, she ran her hands over her skin, her mind conjuring up the image of Jesse Kingston.

Taking the soap, she lathered her body, then massaged the bubbles into her sensitive skin. Slipping back beneath the spray, she leaned against the tiled side of the shower stall. Eyes closed, she luxuriated in the sensual feel of the hot water running over her, rinsing away the velvet lather like a lover’s hands easing away the sweet ache of desire. Jesse’s hands.

She knew with a certainty that making love with Jesse Kingston would be an experience that she’d never recover from. Right now, even with her skin tingling and her lips still swollen from their kiss, she wasn’t willing to take that risk.

Tiny shards of ice attacked her without warning. Her eyes flew open. She’d stood under the shower much longer than she’d intended. The water had turned to arctic runoff. Her memory played back Mildred Hopkins’s warning. The diminutive landlady had been quite firm.

I turn off the water heater at eleven-thirty. No sense letting it run all night. That’s just a waste of good money.

Gasping for breath and fighting a shower curtain that insisted on adhering itself to her slick body, Karen battled her way out of the shower. Grabbing her thick bath towel from the towel bar, she wrapped it around her frigid body, turned off the water, then leaned against the sink, gasping for air.

“Talk about your rude awakenings…. I’ll have to remember that for the next time I have a run-in with Jesse.” No. There would be no more run-ins, no more incidents of her sticking her nose in where it didn’t belong. And above all, no more kisses.

Jesse posed far too much danger to her peace of mind, and she’d do well to remember that. She had not come here to have an affair with a man who could leave scars the size of Texas on her heart, a man who carried his own scars and refused to share them with anyone. She might know way more than she should about the Kingston sisters and nothing about the brother who held himself apart, but she didn’t plan on rectifying that. The less she knew, the better. Once she’d gotten what she’d come for, she’d head back to the safety of New York City.

Grabbing her nightie and slipping it on, she headed back to her room. So much for a good night’s sleep. She deposited her dirty clothes in a pile beside the dresser, promising herself she’d pick them up in the morning. Throwing her head forward, she began towel drying her hair. The vigorous massage felt good and helped her vanquish thoughts of Jesse from her mind.

A knock at the door stopped her. She sighed. Her landlady. Couldn’t the woman tell time? The last thing she needed at midnight was a heart-to-heart. The knock came again, this time more insistent. It didn’t look like she was going to give up. Karen figured she might as well answer it.

Realizing she’d left her robe in the bathroom, she held the towel in front of her, strode to the door, then threw it open.

“Mildred, it’s—”

Mouth agape, Karen went numb. Her fingers relaxed their grip on the towel. It slithered down her body to the floor. Unable to move, she knew that nothing but a thin covering of revealing peach silk and lace hid her nakedness from the mesmerized gaze of Jesse Kingston.