Читать книгу The Marriage Decider - Emma Darcy, Emma Darcy - Страница 8

CHAPTER THREE

AMY lost track of time. She found herself sitting at her desk and didn’t remember sinking into her chair. It was as though she’d pressed a self-destruct button and her whole world had slipped out of control, shattering around her.

Vengeance...that’s what she’d wreaked on Jake Carter...paying him out for what Steve had done to her. And she’d had no right to do it. No right at all.

A personal assistant was supposed to personally assist. That was what she was paid for. Any other day she wouldn’t have blinked an eyelid at being left with a baby to mind. She would have taken it in her stride without so much as a murmur of protest, cynically accepting that Jake, the rake, wouldn’t want to be bothered by a baby. Besides which, in business hours, his time was more important than hers. He was the one who pulled in the profits.

She slumped forward, propped her elbows on the desk and dropped her head into her hands. Dear merciful God! Was there some way out of the hole she’d dug for herself?

She couldn’t afford to walk away from this job, not now she was alone. Steve’s departure meant the rent on the apartment would double for her unless she got someone else in to share the cost. These few weeks before Christmas was not a good time for changes.

Besides, who would pay her as much as Jake did? Her salary was more than generous for her qualifications. And she would miss the perks that came with meeting and doing business for rich and famous people.

Her gaze lifted and ruefully skirted the photographs hanging on the walls; celebrities on their luxury yachts, on board their private jets, travelling in style to exciting places, wining and dining in classy surroundings, perfect service on tap.

Of course Jake was in all the photographs, showing off his clientele and what he had provided for them. The man was a brilliant salesman. The photographs were public proof that he was the one to deliver what was desired.

And the plain truth was, however much he provoked her with his teasing and wicked ways, Amy did, for the most part, enjoy the challenge of matching wits with him. He kept her on her toes, goaded her into performing at her best, and the work was never boring. Neither was he.

She’d miss him.

Badly.

Especially with Steve gone.

She’d miss this plush office, too.

Where else would she get a workplace that could even come near to matching what she had here at Wide Blue Yonder?

Her gaze drifted around, picking up on all she could be about to lose. The carpet was the jewel-like turquoise colour of coral reef lagoons, the paintwork the mellow yellow shade of sandy beaches, outlined in glossy white. Fresh arrangements of tropical flowers were brought in every week, exotic blooms in orange and scarlet mixed with glowing greenery. Every modern technological aid for business was at her fingertips—no expense spared in providing her with the best of everything.

Then there was the million dollar view—an extension of the vista that could be seen from Jake’s office—Darling Harbour and Balmain directly across the water, Goat Island, and stretching along this shoreline, Luna Park with its cluster of carnival rides and entertainment booths.

Mortified at her own lunacy for giving none of this a thought before barging in to confront Jake, Amy pushed out of her chair and moved over to the picture window overlooking the grinning clown face that marked the entrance to the old amusement park. Fun, it promised. Just like Jake. Except she’d hot-headedly wiped fun off today’s agenda.

She should go back into his office and apologise.

But how to explain her behaviour?

Never had she struck such a blistering attitude with him. He was probably sitting in there, mulling over what it meant, and he wouldn’t gloss over it. Not Jake Carter. No way would he leave it alone. If he wasn’t thinking of firing her for insubordination, he was plotting how to use her outburst to his advantage.

She shivered.

Give Jake even a molehill of an advantage and he could build it into a mountain that put him on top of any game he wanted to play. She’d seen him do it over and over again. If he let her stay on...

The sound of the door between their offices being opened froze her train of thought. It raised prickles around the nape of her neck. Panic screamed along her nerves and cramped her heart. She’d left it too late to take some saving initiative. In helpless anguish she turned to face the man who held her immediate future in his hands.

He stood in the doorway, commanding her attention by the sheer force of his presence. The absence of any hint of a smile was stomach-wrenching. He observed her in silence for several tension-riven seconds, his eyes focused intensely on hers. Amy’s mind screamed at her to say something, offer an olive branch, anything to smooth over what she’d done, but she couldn’t tear her tongue off the roof of her mouth.

“I’m sorry.”

Soft words... words she should have said. She stared at his mouth. Had they really come from him or had she imagined it? Yet how could she imagine an apology when she hadn’t expected it?

His lips twisted into a rueful grimace. “I was out of line, dumping Joshua on you and taking it for granted you’d mind him for me.”

Incredulity held her tongue-tied.

The grimace tilted up into an appealing smile. “Guess I thought all women melted over babies. I didn’t see it as an imposition. More like a novelty.”

She felt hopelessly screwed up. Her hand shot out in an agitated gesture. “I...over-reacted,” she managed, her voice a bare croak.

He shrugged. “Hell, what do I know? You’re so buttoned up about your private life. There must be some reason you’re not married to the guy you’ve been living with all these years.” His eyebrows slanted in an expression of caring concern. “Is there a problem about having a baby?”

The sympathetic tone did it.

Like the trumpets that brought down the walls of Jericho, it struck chords in Amy that triggered a collapse of her defences. Tears welled into her eyes and she couldn’t find the will to stop them. She wanted to say it wasn’t her fault but the lump in her throat was impassable.

She had a blurry glimpse of shock on Jake Carter’s face, then he was moving, looming towards her, and the next thing she knew his arms had enveloped her and she was weeping on his shoulder and he was muttering a string of appalled comments.

“I didn’t mean it... Honest, Amy!... I was just testing... never thought it was true...”

“’Snot,” she sobbed, her hands clenched against his chest.

“Not true?” His bewilderment echoed in her ears.

She couldn’t bear him thinking she was barren, making her even less of a woman than Steve had left her feeling. She scooped in a deep breath and the necessary words shuddered out. “He didn’t want a baby with me.”

“Didn’t?” He picked up sharply on the past tense.

The betrayal was so fresh and painful, it spilled out. “Having one with her.”

“He knocked up some other woman?”

Jake’s shock on her behalf soothed her wounded pride. “A bwonde,” she explained, her quivering mouth not quite getting around the word.

“Well, I hope you’ve sent him packing.” A fierce admonition, giving Amy the crazy sense he would have done it for her, given the opportunity, probably cracking a bullwhip to effect a very prompt exit.

“Yes,” she lied. It was too humiliating to confess she’d sat like a disembowelled dummy while Steve had gone about dismantling and removing his half of their life together.

“Good riddance,” Jake heartily approved. “You wouldn’t want to have a baby with him, Amy. Couldn’t trust a man like that to stick around.”

“’Sright.” She nodded mournfully, too water-logged to make any cynical parallel to Jake’s attitude to women.

“Still feeling raw about it,” he murmured sympathetically.

“Yes.”

“Guess you only found out this weekend.”

“Tol’ me Sat’day.”

“And I had to slap you in the face with Joshua.”

The self-recrimination stirred her to meet him halfway. “Not your fault.” There, she’d finally got it out. “Sorry,” she added for good measure.

“Don’t worry about it, Amy. Bad timing, that’s all.”

He was being so kind and understanding, patting her on the back, making her feel secure with him, cared for and valued. His warmth seeped into her bones. Her hands relaxed, fingers spreading out across the comforting heat of his chest. She nestled closer to him and he stroked her hair.

Like a wilted sponge, she soaked in his tender compassion, needing it, wanting it. She’d felt so terribly alone these past two days, so bereft of anyone to care about her...

A baby cry pierced the pleasant fuzziness swimming around in her mind. Joshua! Left alone in the other office! Amy lifted her heavy head, reluctant to push out of Jake’s embrace but she couldn’t really stay there. Kind understanding only went so far. This was a place of business. A line had to be drawn.

Jake might start thinking she liked being this close to him. In fact, weren’t his arms tightening around her, subtly shifting their body contact, stirring a consciousness of how very male he was? To Amy’s increasing confusion, she found she wasn’t immune to the virility she’d always privately scorned. For several electrifying moments she was mesmerised by its effect on her.

Another baby cry escalated into a wail, demanding attention.

“Responsibility calls, I’m afraid,” Jake said wryly, confusing Amy further as he gently loosened his hold on her.

Had she imagined the slight sexual pressure?

He retained one supporting hand at her waist as he lifted his other to tilt her face up. His eyes were a warm, caressing gold. “Got your feet back?” he softly teased.

It drew a wobbly smile. “Firm on the floor again.”

“Good!” He nodded approval. The warm molten gold hardened to a glitter. “Better go and wash that guy off your face, as well as out of your mind.”

In short, she was a mess and he wanted his personal assistant back in good form. Of course that was all he wanted. Jake Carter was too smart to muddy up his business with pleasures he could get so easily elsewhere.

Then his fingertips brushed her cheek. “Okay?”

Her skin tingled, most probably from the flush of embarrassment rising to her cheeks. “Yes,” she asserted as strongly as she could.

He gave her a lopsided grin as he dropped his hand and stepped away. “The godfather is on duty. Got to see to Joshua.”

He was already at the door before she summoned breath enough to say, “Thanks, Jake.”

“Any time. My shoulders are broad,” he tossed at her good-humouredly. heading into his office to tend to his nephew.

Amy took several deep breaths to re-stabilise herself, then forced her legs into action. She picked up her handbag and strode off to the washroom, determined on being what she was supposed to be for Jake. She wouldn’t forget his forebearance and kindness, either. Nor the moral support he’d given her. He almost counted as a friend, a solidly loyal friend.

On second thought, she shouldn’t go overboard with that sentiment. Jake Carter was her boss. It was more efficient to get his personal assistant back in good working order than to train someone else to meet his needs. She was well aware of Jake’s strong dash of pragmatism. Whatever it took to get the end he wanted was meticulously mapped and carried through.

All the same, she deeply appreciated his...well, his sensitivity...to her distress just now. He was also right. She was well rid of a man who cheated on her. She should stop grieving and start getting on with the rest of her life.

Though that was easier said than done.

At least she still had her job.

The black hole had closed up before she’d fallen right to the bottom of it, thank God!

Proving she was back in control again, her hand remained absolutely steady as she once more cleaned off her face and re-applied some masterly make-up. Then feeling more in command of herself, she hurried to Jake’s office, determined to offer any assistance he required. After all, Joshua was not Steve’s baby. She could handle looking after him.

As for Jake...well, she’d been handling him for the past two years. Nothing was going to change there. She just had to keep her head and not let him close to her body again. Business as usual.