Читать книгу The White Rose of Memphis - Falkner William Clark - Страница 10

“Lottie had been at the Bards Town School in Kentucky for four years; but she usually spent the summer vacation at home. She graduated with the highest honors, having won the first prize in Greek, Latin and French, and triumphantly carried off the costly gold cup offered for the best original poem. There were two things combined which contributed to her success. In the first place, she possessed the active brain, and the ambition; and in the second place, she had been trained and taught much of the time by Mr. Rockland before she went to the Kentucky school. The iron lawyer would often take her into his library and make her recite lesson after lesson, when he would lecture her on the different branches of her studies. Then he would stray away into ancient and modern history, poetry and politics, spending hours in expounding them to the mind that was so able and willing to grasp the meaning. He would often make Lottie draw up bills in chancery – write pleas and declarations under his direction. Then he would explain all the legal points in some important case, and request her to look up the law and arrange his brief. It was a remarkable fact that Mr. Rockland would neglect his best paying clients in order to cram his solid ideas into Lottie’s grasping mind.

“‘Ed, she will be home to-morrow,’ said Harry Wallingford as he ran his hand under my arm and walked down the street by my side. ‘I have just received a telegram from her; she left Bards Town this morning, and is now in Louisville. Mr. Rockland is going to give a grand ball in honor of her great triumph as the champion prize-taker at Bards Town. I suppose you have heard about her wonderful victory?’

“‘Yes.’

“‘See here, old fellow, is that all you have to say in praise of this wonderful sister of mine? What is the matter with you, anyway? You look as if you wanted to murder somebody.’

“‘There is nothing wrong with me at all, and I am glad to hear of Lottie’s grand achievements,’ I replied rather dryly, because I had begun to discuss with my mind on the probabilities of losing Lottie. I knew full well that many a gallant knight would be ready to leap into the arena as a contestant for the charming prize – ready to battle to the death to win the hand and heart of the most lovely, the most beautiful and the most talented girl in Tennessee. When I weighed my chances well I was forced to the conclusion that they were too light to go into the balances against many other young men who I knew were going to enter the lists. Lottie had always manifested a partiality for me, but I was afraid that it was more a feeling of sisterly love than anything else. During our childhood days we had often talked of the feelings of true love which we had for each other; but Lottie was now a woman, and I did not want her to love me as a brother. I had no money, and but little education – was green and awkward, timid and ugly, and had no confidence in myself; but I was determined to break many a lance before a rival should carry off the great prize.

“Mr. Rockland was so deeply in love with Lottie that it amounted to idolatry, and it was generally believed, and publicly expressed, that he would settle his large fortune on her. He was extravagant in the expenditure of money for her comfort; in fact, he poured it out like water to gratify her slightest wish, though she was rather inclined to be economical and prudent. She seemed to think more of her books and music than she did of dress and display.

“‘Ed, old boy,’ exclaimed Wallingford, after a long pause, ‘did you know that I was very proud of my sister?’

“‘Yes.’

“‘Ah, yes, I tell you what it is, she is ahead of any girl in Memphis, so far as intelligence and goodness are concerned. Mrs. Rockland says that she is going to set Lottie out when the ball comes off.’

“‘How set her out?’

“‘Pshaw! don’t you know what they mean by setting a girl out? Of course you do. When a girl is ready to receive matrimonial propositions they set her out; that is, they hang out the sign. As the gamblers say, they spread their lay-out, don’t you see? Well, Mrs. Rockland is going to rig Lottie up and throw her at the heads of the male community, as it were. Now, Ed, let me tell you one thing: I mean to have something to say in that little skirmish, and the man who marries my sister must be the reliable sort. If any sap-head bumpkin begins to caper around Lottie, I’ll just give him unlimited leave of absence; and if he don’t take it, I’ll wring off his head.’

“‘Do you intend to marry her to a rich man; or shall she marry for love?’

“‘Of course she shall marry the man of her choice, provided he is of the right stamp. I don’t care about the length of his purse, but he must have brains, and a heart of the right sort, and he must have an established reputation for honor and integrity. If any man were to marry my sister and be unkind to her, don’t you know I would kill him?’

“‘I should be inclined to do such a man some great bodily harm myself.’

“‘Thank you, Ed, I believe you would; and well you might, because, you know, Lottie always loved you as a brother.’

“I felt my heart make a sudden leap and drive the blood to my cheeks when he spoke of brotherly love. I wanted none of that sort. I felt miserable, and was unable to conceal my feelings.

“‘By-by, old boy,’ said Wallingford, as he turned into the street that led to his office. ‘You must call and see us when Lottie gets home.’

“I bowed stiffly, said nothing, and hurried on to my home by no means satisfied with the prospects. ‘They are going to set her out, are they?’ I said mentally. ‘Good! I’ll be there when the show begins, and though my chance is slim, yet I’ll die hard, if die I must.’ I made a draw on Doctor Dodson for cash to pay for a first-class ball dress, and felt profoundly thankful to my tailor for the skill he displayed in the make-up. I did not call to see Lottie when she arrived, because I wanted to appear at the ball in my splendid new costume, so as to take a fair start in the matrimonial tilt I knew the other young men would make.

“Grand indeed were the preparations that were being made for the great ball, and the young people who had been so fortunate as to receive an invitation were looking forward impatiently to the eventful day; and no one thought about it more anxiously than I did. I was very full of apprehension and doubt in regard to Lottie’s feelings toward me, and I propounded a thousand questions to my own mind about it. ‘Will she look down from the high circle where fortune has placed her to the humble sphere in which I am doomed to dwell? or will she forget the poor awkward boy who, in the happy days of old, was glad to kiss the dust that had felt the touch of her little feet? Why should she stoop so low as to even think of me? What right have I, a poor half-educated clerk, to expect such a brilliant, beautiful heiress to lavish her favors on me, when men of wealth and high position are ready to lay their honors and wealth at her feet? What right have I to aspire so high?’ ‘None – none – none!’ was thundered in my ear by Common Sense, as the answer to my mental questions. ‘Miss Charlotte Wallingford is not for your sort,’ said Reason. ‘She is fit for the wife of a king!’ ‘Yes, but I saved her life,’ said my Mind, ‘and she is under obligations to me.’ ‘True enough,’ Reason replies, ‘but it does not follow that she must marry you. Women’s lives are often saved by their servants, yet they do not marry them.’ ‘But it will kill me if Miss Wallingford marries any other man.’ ‘No matter if it does – why should she care? the world will never feel the loss – the sun will shine as bright, the flowers grow as sweet, and the seasons will come and go after you are dead just as they did when you were alive.’ With such unpleasant reflections as these I had managed to work my mind up to an unusual degree of excitement. I became gloomy and unhappy to such an extent as to attract the attention of my good mother (as I called Mrs. Dodson), and she begged me to tell her the cause of my misery. I evaded her questions, and sought solitude, where I could give vent to my sorrow unmolested. She cast many an imploring look at me when I would leave my food untasted. My cheeks grew pale and my appetite failed, and I hugged my misery to my breast, and told my secret to none. I was proud, and felt offended, but had no reasons to give for it. No one had been unkind to, or in any manner maltreated me, yet I was querulous, melancholy and despairing.

“‘Ah, ha! here we come, my boy,’ said Doctor Dodson one morning as he came into the store. ‘What’s the matter, what’s the matter, Ed, my boy? speak it out, speak it out, let it come; what makes you look like a ghost, my boy? Pshaw! don’t tell me such a tale as that, my boy, ah, ha! don’t you do it, I say; indigestion! did you ever know a Russian bear to have bad digestion? No, no, Ed, my boy, you needn’t try to fool me – you can’t do it. The disease is in your mind, ah, ha! don’t you see? Yes, yes, that’s what’s the matter. Something has gone wrong. I’d say it was a love scrape, if it was any other boy; but my old booby has too much sense for anything of that sort; ah, ha! don’t you see how it is, my boy?’

“I soon became convinced that the good old doctor would pry the secret out of me unless I resorted to falsehood, which I resolved not to do; therefore I begged him to let me alone, promising to tell him everything at the end of ten days.

“‘Ah, ha! very good, my boy; I won’t press you further just now, but I mean to hold you down to your promise, don’t you see? I won’t let you go to Philadelphia while you are looking like a defunct specimen of humanity, ah, ha! don’t you see? You look more like a fit subject for a grave-yard than a medical school, ah, ha! yes, that you do, my boy. There now, go to work, and quit this moping about as if you wanted to sneak into a tomb.’

“I was glad when the doctor was called to see one of his patients.

“At last the time for the grand ball arrived, and I had arranged my toilet with unusual care. My good mother had been persuading me to send my card to Miss Ella Willchester, a charming young lady residing just across the street from our house, but it would have required the strength of a forty horse-power engine to make me escort any other girl to Lottie’s ball. I thought it would be treason to her if I offered any favors to any other girl. The fact is, I could not think of anybody else but Lottie; her image was floating before my eyes by day, and swimming in my mind when I was asleep. I did not make my appearance at the ball until after ten o’clock, for I wanted to slip in quietly, unobserved, in order that I might see whether Lottie had even so much as thought about me. I must acknowledge that I felt rather sheepish when I was going round so as to come in at the side entrance, hoping to get in unnoticed. The band commenced playing a lively waltz as I stepped on the veranda at the end of the ball-room, and a dozen couples went whirling round and floating gracefully through the hall. I took a seat on a chair near a window, where I could peep between the folds of the rich lace curtains and watch the movements of the guests within. I noticed a half dozen young men crowd round a young lady whose back was toward me. They were struggling with, and jostling each other, all apparently eager to get a word with the young lady. Who was the fair one that attracted such attention? was the question that came up in my mind. I could see the tall, queen-like form, but could not get a view of her face. The square shoulders and straight body, the beautiful arms and bright golden hair were visible, but my mind was full of curiosity to know who she was. I thought it might be Lottie, but then she was too tall – or at least I concluded that after a moment’s reflection. It was Lottie, nevertheless, and I had lost sight of the fact that it had been nearly a year since I had seen her. She abruptly left the crowd of admirers.

“‘Excuse me a moment, please,’ I heard her say as she went to her brother, who occupied a seat just inside the room, and within six feet of where I was. ‘Brother, has Eddie come yet?’ I heard the question distinctly.

“‘No; I don’t think he has,’ was the reply.

“‘I am afraid he is ill, else he would have been here long ago.’

“‘Pshaw! sister, never mind Ed; he isn’t the sort that gets sick.’

“‘Oh, I am so sorry he is not here!’

“I could bear it no longer; my heart was again in my throat, and I thrust my hand in between the curtains, and said: ‘I did not expect you would have time to spare a thought about me on such an occasion as this.’

“She uttered a smothered scream, sprang through the door, and seized both of my hands and began to jerk them up and down. Never had my eyes beheld such a lovely object as the one then before me, such radiant beauty, such lofty, dazzling charms, such large, liquid blue eyes and bright golden hair, such round, pretty arms, such a tall, stately form! Nothing could match this angelic creature! I was stunned – surprised, and almost paralyzed, as I stood staring with open mouth at the wonderful beauty before me. ‘Is this Lottie? Can this be the same little blue-eyed thing who tramped so many miles by my side long, long ago?’ That was the question that naturally forced itself on my mind. I could not realize the fact that this radiant model of perfection and the little sore-footed tramp were one and the same person.

“‘I am going to give you a real good scolding, Eddie,’ she said as she still held both of my hands tightly clasped in hers. ‘Why have you not come to see me before now; and what made you come so late to-night; and what made you slip in here and hide as if you had been doing a mean thing?’

“All I could do was to stand like an idiot, staring at the indescribable beauty before me, unable to utter a word. I then and there concluded that she never would be mine. No such woman could ever come down low enough to be the wife of a half-educated pill-maker.

“‘What is the matter, Eddie?’ she exclaimed in an anxious tone, as she cast a look of surprise at me. ‘You are ill – your hands are very cold, and your face is as pale as death.’

“‘No, I am very well, I thank you,’ I managed with a struggle to say.

“‘You are trying to deceive me, but you cannot do it; you have been ill?’

“‘Partners for a quadrille!’ exclaimed the leader of the band, and three young men made a dash toward Lottie, each one claiming her as a partner. She took the arm of Mr. Heartsell, after some little controversy as to whose turn it was to dance with her, and soon was floating through the waltz with him.

“‘By Jupiter! She is a stunner, ain’t she, Sam?’ exclaimed a dandyfied youth as Heartsell led her away.

“‘Your head’s level, and don’t you forget it!’ replied the one addressed, who was a little, hook-nosed law student with but a small amount of brains and lots of brass.

“Wherever I went I could hear groups of young men lavishing their extravagant praises on the wonderful young beauty who had so suddenly blazed down among them like a newly discovered planet.

“As soon as Lottie was released from Heartsell she came back to me. ‘Eddie,’ said she, ‘I want you to enjoy yourself here to-night, and you must let me introduce you to some of these charming young ladies. I heard one expressing an anxiety to be introduced to that tall, handsome young gentleman with the shaggy whiskers. I think she is smitten with both you and your whiskers; come, let me introduce you!’

“‘No, you must excuse me – Lottie, I will not dance to-night, unless it is with you.’

“‘Indeed, you do me great honor, and I’ll put you down for the third set, as I am engaged for the next two, and would have been for every other one but I declined the honor. You must excuse me now – I am acting hostess to-night, as mother is not very well.’

“I waited for my turn with no small degree of impatience, as I sat like a picture against the wall watching Lottie as she glided like a fairy through the mazes of the dance. She was dressed in white satin, trimmed with lace of the most exquisite and costly pattern, with close and smooth-fitting body, which set off her round, straight form to great advantage. A cluster of sparkling diamonds fastened both ends of a pearl necklace which met on her bosom, while a large white rose was pinned at her throat with a little golden arrow; and a broad band of gold encircled each wrist, while a large amethyst set glittered from each one of the bracelets. Her long, golden hair was coiled up in two plaited rolls, and pinned on the back of her head with a pair of Cupid-darts set in diamonds. I never had seen Lottie so exquisitely dressed before, although she was always very particular and neat in her toilet. Mr. Rockland had ordered her set of diamonds from New York especially for that occasion.

“At last the time arrived when I was to waltz with her, and I would have been glad to offer an excuse, because I was trembling like one in an ague fit, and felt as if I were going to make a botch of it. I knew I was clumsy, awkward, and a novice at the business, and just as I was about to stammer out an excuse, the band struck up a lively waltz, and Lottie seized me without ceremony and almost dragged me to the middle of the floor. I imagined that the eyes of every one in the room were gazing at me, and I was about half right, for my tall, gawky form loomed up above all the other men, which attracted the attention of the spectators. When we began to whirl round the room Lottie let her cheek rest on my shoulder; and I felt her cool sweet breath fanning my face, while her beautiful eyes gazed up into mine with an expression of unmixed delight. I had not failed to notice how differently she acted when waltzing with me from what she did with other men. Her fair cheek had never touched another man’s shoulder on that night, and no one had been able to keep her on the floor as long as I did. I soon became warmed up, and my blood boiled with the intoxicating influence of the music, and the love for the girl whose cheek rested on my shoulder. I forgot everything but the dear idol who was so near my heart, and would have kept whirling round until my limbs gave way under me, but the music ceased, and I led Lottie to a seat; but I did not get a chance to enjoy her company many moments before she was surrounded by a crowd of young men, who insisted on leading her to the piano. The musicians had laid down their instruments, and were enjoying a smoke on the veranda, and Lottie was urged to sing. I drew as near as I could, and took my stand on her left. She ran her fingers rapidly over the keys and then asked me what she should sing.

“‘Give us something to remind us of olden times!’

“‘Very well, here is one of my own invention:

“Every time she lingered on the words ‘A hero loved me then,’ her eyes were raised to mine for a moment and I thought I saw an appealing look in them, and a glance of inquiry. When she came to the last three lines her voice trembled slightly, and when she fixed her beautiful eyes on me I saw that they were moist, though no tears fell from them. She repeated the last three lines in a low, plaintive tone.

“For a few seconds after the last sweet sound had ceased not a word was spoken. Lottie declined to sing any more, notwithstanding she was urged to do so by the entire audience, but she rose from the piano and made her way to me, and running her arm under mine, said:

“‘Come, Eddie, take me out where we can get a little fresh air – I am smothering in here.’

“The proposition suited me admirably, for I was anxious to be alone with her, and went out on the portico and began to walk up and down the floor, while Lottie leaned on my arm, with her face turned up toward mine. I was too happy to talk; my heart thrilled with delight, and I remained silent. After making a few rounds on the portico without speaking, we took seats on a low wooden bench, where a thick cluster of honeysuckle vines formed a canopy that would conceal us from the prying eyes of Mr. Heartsell and two other young men who were apparently watching us.

“‘Now, Edward,’ said Lottie, ‘I want you to tell me what is the matter with you? Come now, don’t try to deceive me, for you know you cannot do it. I have not seen you smile to-night. You don’t look or act as you did in the happy days of old. You were always cheerful and pleasant then, but you look pale and serious now.’

“‘Lottie, I know I could not deceive you if I were to try; but I have no wish to do anything of the sort. I am unhappy, but I do not know that I could give any good reason for it. One thing, however, I will say, and that is I think we shall never see any more such happy days as we have spent together. I see a great gulf beginning to flow in between you and me, which sooner or later will drive us apart forever!’

“‘Pshaw! Edward, you ought not to talk that way – it pains me deeply to hear it. No gulf could be made wide enough to separate me from such a dear, good, noble brother as you have been to me; but what do you mean when you speak of a gulf coming between us?’

“‘You have an accomplished education, a superior mind, as well as very great beauty, and are to be a great heiress. Mr. Rockland is proud and wealthy, and is very fond of you, he will expect you to marry some distinguished man of his own choosing. I may be mistaken, but I don’t think he would be pleased to have me as a frequent visitor at his house. He did not speak to me to-night, but cast on me a cold, contemptuous look, and bowed stiffly.’

“‘Now see here, Edward, in the first place, I think you are very much mistaken in supposing Mr. Rockland dislikes you. He is naturally a very stern, sad man, but he has a warm, tender heart, and I believe he loves me dearly; but I tell you now plainly that the man who hates my dear, noble brother must hate me too. And when it comes to the question of matrimony, I guess I will have something to say about that. In the first place, I do not want to marry at all, and in the next place, I shall be very certain never to marry any man unless I love him with all my heart!’

“While she was uttering the words just mentioned she made the heels of her little boots clatter against the floor rapidly, and I could see by the sparkle of her eyes that she meant what she said. I was partially pleased, and partially vexed – pleased to hear her say that she never would marry any man unless she loved him; vexed to hear her speak of her love toward me as a dear brother– I wanted a different sort of love. She now took the beautiful white rose from her throat and put it in the button-hole of my coat, and while she was doing so her lovely face was within three inches of mine, and I felt her cool breath gently touching my cheek. When she finished the job, over which I thought she lingered a long time, she gave me a gentle slap on the cheek and said:

“‘There, now, that is very nice; and I want you to drive away that ugly frown from your brow, and go in and help me to entertain my guests. Will you do it?’

“‘Yes, Lottie, you know I will do anything to please you; but stop a moment – I want to know what you meant by composing such a song as the one you sang a moment ago? Who is it that loved you truly then, and loves you now no more?’

“‘Ask me no questions, and I will tell you no falsehoods, but I guess you could answer that question better than I could. But come along now – we must go in, for I heard some one inquiring for me; give me your arm, and don’t forget the ugly frown.’

“‘Trust me now, Lottie, and I’ll be as polite to your guests as a French dancing master.’

“‘Good enough, Edward! so come along.’

“We returned to the ball-room, when Mr. Heartsell came up to engage Lottie as his partner for the next set.

“‘I beg you to excuse me, Mr. Heartsell – I am going to dance with Mr. Demar in this set.’

“Now here was unmistakable evidence of partiality on Lottie’s part toward me, for I had not asked her to dance with me; in fact, I had not intended to dance any more that night.

“My self-conceit went up to a premium, my heart swelled with indescribable delight, and I began to think that after all I was not to be laid entirely on the shelf. I knew that Heartsell was going to be a suitor for Lottie’s hand, and I considered him my most dangerous rival, as I was aware of the fact that he was Mr. Rockland’s favorite. He bit his lip with vexation as I led Lottie off to begin the waltz, while a feeling of triumph swelled up in my bosom. When the waltz was ended, Lottie parted from me as she whispered:

“‘Now, Eddie, remember my guests, and try to help to entertain them.’

“As she left me, Heartsell drew up in front of me, and stared at me for a moment, while I thought that I perceived something like a sneer of contempt play for a second on his face. ‘Hullo, Demar!’ he exclaimed, ‘where did you get that beautiful white rose?’

“‘That, sir, was fastened here by the prettiest girl in this room,’ I replied, haughtily, as I drew myself up and walked away. I saw his cheeks grow purple with anger as he went toward Lottie, who was talking with a middle-aged lady near by.

“‘Miss Wallingford,’ he said as he bowed low before her, ‘will you honor me with a short interview?’

“Without uttering a word, Lottie took his arm and was led out through a side door which opened on the corridor. They came round on the outside of the room and stopped within six feet of the seat where I was, and immediately opposite a window, the sash of which was up, but the curtains were down. I knew from the tone of Mr. Heartsell’s voice that he was angry with Lottie about something.

“‘You seem to be enjoying yourself better than usual to-night.’

“‘Why should I not enjoy myself when I am among so many good kind friends?’

“‘I am truly glad to see you enjoying the society of your very good friend.’

“‘Why do you choose to use the singular number?’

“‘Because if you have any more than one friend (and I am happy to believe you have), you have been very careful to avoid letting them know that you recognized them.’

“‘Why, Mr. Heartsell, how can you be so unjust as to say that?’

“‘How many times have you danced with me to-night?’

“‘Once.’

“‘How many times with Mr. Campston?’

“‘I have not danced with him at all.’

“‘Did he ask you?’

“‘Yes.’

“‘How many sets have you danced with Demar?’

“‘Two.’

“‘“Now, in the name of all the gods at once, upon what meat doth this our Cæsar feed that he is grown so great? Why, man, he doth bestride the narrow world like a Colossus, and we petty men walk under his huge legs and peep about to find ourselves dishonorable graves.”’

“‘If your sarcasm is intended for Mr. Demar, I beg permission to say that you might find a dishonorable grave without peeping about his legs to find it.’

“‘Oh, I crave your pardon, Miss Wallingford, I assure you I meant no offense; but candidly, I should be glad to know what Demar has done to entitle him to such distinguished privileges? How is it that this great Cæsar can monopolize the beauteous belle of the ball, while we petty men must peep about among common people to find ourselves partners?’

“‘Mr. Heartsell, it is not agreeable for me to listen to wit of this nature, because Mr. Demar has been to me a devoted friend, a true, noble, unselfish brother. Look at that scar on my wrist, if you please.’

“‘Well, I see it; what about that?’

“‘That scar was made by the poisonous fangs of a rattlesnake, and I would have died in ten minutes but that this generous, heroic brother drew the poison from my veins with his lips, and came very near losing his own life by the brave deed. Well may you compare him with Cæsar, because, while you do it in jest, I will do it in earnest, for his courage entitles him to all the honors that an inexperienced girl like me can bestow. If it should be my pleasure to grant him more favors than I do to other gentlemen, I trust I can do so without giving offense to them.’

“‘Ah, Miss Wallingford, you are an eloquent orator, and if Cæsar did have his friend Marcus Antonius to defend him, Demar has a more eloquent defender in you. I envy him, and would make any sacrifice to win such favors as fall to his share. I dare say you are quite lucky to have two such brave, good brothers as Demar and Wallingford.’

“‘Indeed, I think so, and am happy in the thought, too.’

“‘By the by, Miss Wallingford, you have lost that beautiful white rose that I saw on your throat a while ago.’

“‘You are mistaken, sir, I did not lose it.’

“‘Ah, indeed! I asked you to give it to me, and you refused; you certainly did not present it to another gentleman?’

“‘And why should I not give it to whom I pleased; was it not mine?’

“‘Hem! yes, I cannot deny that, but such partiality as that would clip an insult very close, and I am loth to believe such a charming lady as Miss Wallingford would offer an indignity to one who loves and who esteems her so highly as I do.’

“‘Now, Mr. Heartsell, I should be very unhappy if I thought I had given you any just cause for offense, but in this instance I must say it appears to me that you are manufacturing a mountain out of a mole-hill. If you desire it, I will present you with a basketful of roses this instant.’

“‘No, no; you shall do nothing of the sort. It was not the rose itself that I cared for, but it was the emblem which would have come with it. May I know who was the lucky donee?’

“‘Certainly you may, for I assure you there is no secret connected with it. I had the honor (she put the accent heavy on the honor) to present the rose to my noble, heroic brother, Edward Demar.’

“Now we should never use extravagant language, and we should worship no living being except God; but on that particular occasion I confess I committed such a sin; though if the recording angel sets it down against me, I believe he will credit me with a partial justification, at least. How could I sit there and hear the most charming woman in America boasting of the honor she had done herself by presenting a rose to me, and not feel an inclination to fall down and worship her? How could I hear her dear voice sounding eloquently in praise of me, without thinking extravagant thoughts? The fact is, I was so much excited that they might have heard the loud throbbings of my heart, if they had listened. I determined, however, to put an end to Mr. Heartsell’s little tete-a-tete, because I knew it would please her. I went round on the north side and passed across, coming up to where they stood, and coughed as I approached, in order to notify Lottie of my arrival.

“‘Your friends will be curious to know what has become of their fair hostess, Miss Wallingford,’ I observed, as I halted by her side.

“‘Ah, thank you, brother, for reminding me of my duty,’ she replied, as she took my arm and bowed stiffly to Heartsell. ‘We will finish our little quarrel at another time, sir.’

“‘No, no; the victory is yours, and I make an unconditional surrender. Render unto Cæsar that which is his, but don’t crowd things on him that don’t belong to him.’

“‘That fellow Heartsell is an impertinent scamp, and I mean to tell him so.’

“‘If you do you will displease me beyond measure, for I think he is a perfect gentleman; I am ashamed to say that I have treated him rather unkindly to-night, and I mean to apologize as soon as I have an opportunity.’

“‘Oh! very well, if you love him, you should let him know it by all means!’

“‘See here, Edward, I must request you not to mention Mr. Heartsell’s name in my presence any more to-night; and I will also ask you to excuse me now, as I must really mingle among my guests, and give them some attention.’

“Then she left me, and soon was surrounded by a crowd of young men. I did not have a chance to talk with her any more that night, and when I went home my mind was full of strange conjectures and conflicting emotions. One question appeared to be pretty well settled, and that was a perfect knowledge on my part that all my hopes of happiness would be destroyed if Lottie should refuse to marry me. Love is a strange passion, and no one knows how it can upset a man’s equanimity, unless he has learned it by actual experience. It is a passion that produces indescribable happiness to those who are loved in return, but of all the distressing pains and horrible torture that mortal man ever felt, that which he suffers when his mind is racked with doubt on that subject is the greatest. I had resolved a hundred times to have that question settled, but when in Lottie’s presence my tongue was paralyzed and my brain refused to lay out a sensible idea. I had ordered a jeweler to make an exquisite gold ring, with a beautiful diamond set, and had Lottie’s and my name engraved on the inside. This I had carried in my pocket for two weeks, intending to ask her to accept it as an engagement ring, but for reasons already stated I failed to do it. I had written out and memorized what I supposed to be an eloquent speech, which I intended to deliver with the ring, but my courage oozed out the very moment those large, beautiful blue eyes set their sight on me. Lottie had a strange habit of looking me square in the face, which never failed to set my limbs to trembling and my heart to thumping. I was considered a privileged guest at Mr. Rockland’s house, not by him, but by Lottie, and I visited there often, and was frequently so unlucky as to meet Mr. Heartsell there, and sometimes other young men who had entered the lists. I watched Lottie very closely, but I could not tell whether she loved any one of her suitors or not. So far as I was able to judge, she treated all alike.

“I spent at least three days of each week strolling about by Lottie’s side, half crazy with love for her, sometimes buoyed up with hope, at others struggling with suspense and despair. Summer was about to step out, and autumn was ready to walk in. The weather was hot and dry, while dust and heat hung about over all things. Vegetation was parched and withered by the long drought, while gloom and dust combined to make me very miserable, except when I was lingering with Lottie in her beautiful flower garden, which, owing to her industry, was always delightful and cool, for she had everything thoroughly watered every evening. The east side of her garden was thickly shaded with young magnolias, whose broad green leaves protected the thick velvety turf that covered the ground beneath. The west side was set apart for flowers alone, and notwithstanding the protracted drought that had prevailed, they looked as fresh and vigorous as they did in May and June. Old Uncle Zack, as Lottie called the old negro gardener, was always anxious to please his pretty nightingale (a pet name he had given Lottie). During her attendance at the Kentucky school, Uncle Zack had been the manager of her garden and her birds, and on her return she found that the duty had been faithfully performed. A charming summer-house stood near the east boundary of the garden, all covered over with clustering vines and blooming roses. It was at this delightful spot that I had spent so many happy hours with Lottie. A large wooden table sat in the center of the summer house, and low willow chairs were ranged around the sides, and when the weather was fine the table was covered with books, maps, sheet music, drawing materials, magazines and a guitar. Lottie called this her study, for that was the delightful spot where she practiced music and drawing and reviewed her studies generally.

“The time when I was to start to Philadelphia for the purpose of attending the medical lectures was near at hand, and still I had not been able to muster up the courage to make my love known to her. Doctor Dodson was anxious for me to start immediately, because he was uneasy about my health, which was on the decline, but he had no suspicions as to the cause. He thought that a trip to the sea-coast would be beneficial; then he had some business at New York and Boston which he wanted me to transact for him. I could have told him that no journey would restore my health. There was one thing, and only one, that could ever bring health and happiness back to me. I knew that could I be assured of Lottie’s love, all would be well with me; but if that was denied, I never would know health or happiness any more.

“One sultry evening near the end of August, when the sun was about to disappear in the West, after having scorched and burned the earth for twelve consecutive hours, I found myself lingering in the summer-house by Lottie, where I had been for a long time trying to collect the necessary courage to tell her of my love.

“‘Sing one more song for me, Lottie, before I go, please,’ said I, as I drew my chair closer to hers.

“‘What shall it be?’ she inquired, as she picked up her guitar and began to run her fingers over the strings.

“‘I would like to hear the one you sang the night of the ball – I do not know its name. It says something about a hero who loved you in the happy days of old, who loves you now no more.’

“‘Oh, yes; I never will forget that song, for it is one of my favorites, and my own composition. Do you like it, Edward?’

“‘I like to hear you sing it, but I do not think I like the sentiment, for I am sure no one ever loved you in the days of old who does not love you now.’

“I saw a crimson tinge steal over her cheeks, as her beautiful eyes were for a moment fixed on me.

“‘A hero did love me, long ago, anyway, though I don’t know so well about it now; but let that pass – we poor, foolish women should never complain about anything.’

“She then began to tune the instrument, which was suspended by a broad blue ribbon that passed over her left shoulder and was tied to a little brass hook in each end of the guitar.

“Lottie’s voice seemed to be in excellent tune, and in all respects under her control, though it was low and tremulous; and when she came to the line that said, ‘He loves me now no more,’ she looked me full in the face, and repeated the line in a pathetic tone that brought the tears to my eyes. Every vein in my body was full of hot blood. When Lottie came to the last three lines her voice sank to a mere whisper, and I could see that some unusual emotion was at work in her bosom. She paused a moment as the sweet echo of her voice gradually died away, and then she turned round, and fixing her eyes upon me, repeated the last verse:

“She laid the guitar down and turned her face another way, and as I leaned forward slightly, I saw something like a drop of dew trembling on her cheek. That little trembling tear settled my fate. An unaccountable boldness came upon me, and all my timidity disappeared, and I was rash, impetuous, and I might say rude, because I seized her hand and pressed it to my lips a dozen times in rapid succession. My impetuosity seemed to astonish and frighten her, and she began to move away.

“‘It is time I was in the house, Edward,’ said she as she moved away; ‘mother will be calling me if I don’t go.’

“‘No, no, Lottie!’ I exclaimed as I moved toward her; ‘don’t go now; remember I am going away next week, to stay a long, long time, and we never may meet again. The fact of the business is, I think I never shall come back to Memphis any more.’

“Her beautiful face grew a shade paler, but she soon regained composure: ‘Come along then, and let me show you my pretty birds,’ she said as she moved toward a little latticed house that stood about fifty feet from the summer-house. I imagined she was endeavoring to get my mind fixed on other subjects than the one on which my thoughts were bent. I followed her, and when we entered the cozy little house, the old parrot began to laugh and chatter away.

“‘Lottie! Lottie! Lottie!’ he screamed, as he leaped down on her shoulder. ‘Ah, ha! here we come. Lottie! Lottie! Lottie! ah, ha! here we come!’

“‘How did he learn to imitate Doctor Dodson so perfectly?’ I asked.

“‘The doctor frequently comes to see me, and old Roderick has heard him so often that he has caught his expressions.’

“A mocking-bird was singing in a cage that sat on the joist, and a dozen canaries were making sweet music in their little silver-mounted houses, while an old jackdaw was muttering to himself in a wire cage. Each bird seemed to be making music for his own amusement, and on his own hook. It was a combination of discordant sounds, which might have been good music if they could have been induced to sing one at a time. It was a shrewd maneuver of Lottie to decoy me to that place, for no man could talk loud enough to be heard amid such an ear-splitting clatter as was made by these birds.

“I concluded that she had resorted to this strategic maneuver in order to avoid the disagreeable revelation which she had guessed I was about to make. Then I became angry, and that increased my courage and made me quite reckless, and I was determined to know my fate before I left. I believed she could read my inmost thoughts, for I had never seen her more embarrassed than she was then. The sun had entirely disappeared, and a dark purple bank began to loom up in the East, indicating the approach of twilight; while the face of the moon every now and then peeped down through a column of white clouds that flew across the horizon. As the dew began to dampen the flowers around us, a delicious fragrance arose and filled all the air with its ravishing sweetness. I took Lottie’s hand, and placing it under my arm, led her back to the summer-house, and took a seat by her side. Old Bob came up and laid his head on my knee and began to whine, and tried to wag his tail, but it was too short. Notwithstanding the poor old dog was stone blind, it was plain that he recognized me.

“‘Lottie,’ said I, ‘this faithful old friend remembers me, and I am glad to know that there is one living thing in this cold world that cares for me. I want you to take good care of him for my sake when I am gone, for I guess I will not see him any more. I never shall forget those happy days when we were poor, homeless tramps – penniless, friendless and simple, but hopeful and cheerful.’

“Her face was turned away – her eyes were bent on the ground, and she was busy plucking the tender leaves from a bunch of roses, and scattering them at her feet. I knew from the rise and fall of her bosom that some strong emotion was at work in her breast; but I thought it was caused by an unwillingness to listen to my melancholy expressions.

“Taking her left hand, I enclosed it in both of mine, and after holding it a moment, I ventured to raise it to my lips and stamp it with many fervent kisses; then I pressed it over my loud throbbing heart, while her face was still turned away from me.

“‘I wonder if any other man ever will press this little hand against his heart, and call it his?’

“She instantly withdrew it with a sudden jerk, as if an insect had stung her, and then fixing her expressive eyes on me with a reproachful look, said:

“‘I declare, we must go to the house now; mother does not like to keep tea waiting for any one.’

“‘She will excuse you when you inform her that I was making my farewell visit; who knows that we ever shall meet again in this world?’

“Once more she turned her face away and gazed on the ground.

“‘Lottie, here is a beautiful diamond ring I want you to wear; it will prevent you from entirely forgetting the one who has always loved you.’

“As I uttered those words in a trembling tone, I took her hand and slipped the ring on her finger, which she did not resist, nor did she give any signs of assent; in fact, she did not seem to notice what I was saying or doing; but I could see that she was deeply moved with excitement, as her body was trembling violently.

“‘Lottie, will you write me a letter occasionally when I am far away from the one I love so dearly?’

“‘Yes, Edward, I will answer all your letters.’

“After I had placed the ring on her finger, I again pressed her trembling hand against my heart.

“‘Lottie, it will be a long time ere we meet again, and I suppose you will be married to some distinguished man before my return?’

“A gentle shake of the head, and a slight jerk of the hand, was her only answer.

“‘Will you ever think of the boyish tramp who long ago claimed you as his little wife, after I am gone?’

“‘Yes, Edward, I never shall forget the halcyon days of old, for although we were poor, homeless wanderers, we were not unhappy.’

“‘Lottie, I loved that pretty little tramp devotedly then, and time has increased that holy passion, until it has filled my heart, my mind, my soul, my brain, my body, my thoughts, my dreams and my blood! Fortune has not lavished her favors on me, but that is not my fault. I know I am ignorant, green, poor and uneducated, doomed to occupy an humble sphere in life, while the blind goddess has been more liberal in the bestowal of her favors on you. Your beauty and your talent alone would have placed you on a plane far above my lowly valley; but when it is known that you are to be a great heiress, I feel as if it would be too presumptuous on my part to ask you to be mine. I know that I have a rough, ugly and awkward appearance – that I am not such a person as fine ladies love to look on; but I possess a large, fond heart, that holds an ocean of pure love for you. Lottie, why do you not say something; why do you turn your face away from me? Have I offended you by my presumption? If I have dared to talk of love to you, it does not necessarily follow that you are bound to give a favorable answer; in fact, I have no right to expect you to make such a one. If you cannot love me, say so, and I promise never to annoy you any more with my suit, but will endeavor to promote your happiness in every way I can. I profess to be a man of honor, and believe I possess a remarkable amount of pride – too much to annoy any lady about my love who cannot return my honorable passion.’

“Her body now began to tremble more violently than ever, shaking like a leaf stirred by the storm, but she still remained silent, and kept her face averted.

“‘Why do you not speak to me, Lottie? Am I to understand that the refusal is caused by the scorn you feel for my presumption, or is it because you hate to pronounce the doom which you know will consign me to a life of misery? In the name of those happy days of old – in the name of our dear, dead mother – in the name of the great ocean of love which this poor heart holds for you, I implore you to speak to me now!’

“A tear then fell from my eyes, and dropped on her hand, which I still held against my heart; that caused her to start up suddenly, and snatch her hand away. Then she gazed down at the tear which still glistened on her hand, and I saw another tear start from her left eye and roll slowly down her cheek – it trembled on her chin a second, and then fell right on the one that still sparkled on her hand. The two tears mingled into one, and as they did so her head suddenly fell against my heart, and then I knew that the great prize was mine. Looking up into my face with a gaze of unutterable sweetness, while tears were streaming from her beautiful eyes, she whispered:

“‘Eddie, I have always loved you more than language can express, or mind can imagine, and I was sure you knew it all the time. I have never thought of loving any one else; and I do not mean to allow you to slander yourself any more in my presence as you have done here this evening, for I think you noble-hearted, generous, intelligent and brave, and I know you are very handsome!’

“I was too full of joy to speak; and the man who never kissed the lips of a pure woman with a knowledge that her virtuous heart was all his own, cannot understand the indescribable bliss that was mine.

“‘Edward,’ she whispered, while her large, liquid blue eyes were rooted on me, ‘have you ever read “Romeo and Juliet?”’

“‘Yes, darling, very often; but why do you ask the question?’

“‘My love for you is like that which Juliet felt for Romeo. I gave you my heart long, long ago, and if I had it back again then I would borrow her sweet words which she employs in speaking to Romeo:

“‘The sentiment is very sweet, and the language appropriate and expressive, but I trust that our love will not end so sadly as did that of Romeo and Juliet.’

“In the midst of my great joy I did not forget to return my sincere thanks to the great Creator, for bestowing on me such a precious gem.

“‘Lottie, dear, I believe if you would try you could compose a sweet song suited to this occasion, and I hope you will do so, and sing it here every evening while I am far away. Make the effort, and I dare say you will compose one with sentiments as sweet as ever poet wrote; then fix an hour at which you will come to this very spot and sing it, and I will at the same hour steal away and commune with you in spirit, while I gaze on yonder bright star, and listen with my imagination to the sweet music my darling is making here for me.’

“‘Edward, I promise to make the attempt, and if I succeed, I will sing it here at this lovely spot every evening at precisely nine o’clock, when the sky is cloudless; and I will think of you while singing it.’

“‘And will my darling promise to be mine when I return, thereby making me the happiest man that ever walked on the earth?’

“‘If papa gives his consent, and if brother Harry is willing, and if you do not fall in love with, and marry, some beauteous Philadelphia belle, and if I do not die of loneliness while you are so far away from me, and if you do not withdraw the proposition, and if, upon reflection, you are willing to take me with all my imperfections, why, then, I reckon so.’

“‘Now there are a great many if’s contained in that answer, but let it rain if’s until I return, and I will surmount them all. If my path was sown thick with dragons’ teeth, and at every step producing armed men to oppose me, I would march on to secure my great prize!’

“‘Edward, can you not postpone the time set for you to start to Philadelphia for a few weeks?’

“‘Yes, and will gladly do so, for I must settle the question of the if’s before I go. I must know Mr. Rockland’s mind, as well as Harry’s in regard to our betrothal, before I leave Memphis.’”