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Ready for a Rainy Day?

In his 70s, Clarence Thomas (not the Supreme Court Justice) is a self-labeled “master” inventor. His sister calls him a “fanatic junk man.” His patent office must call him a “regular” as he has 235 patents for all kinds of gadgets. That’s right, 235 patents. Clarence says that people love them, but won’t buy them. He was in the patent office with a germ catcher—“whatever you touch, it’s covered with germs”—when I caught up with him.

“My attic, garage, and house are filled with these things. I’d like to sell at least one. I come up with three new inventions a month.” The Umbrella Article Holder is one such idea that came to him on the way to his job as a building maintenance supervisor on Wall Street. He likes to read the newspaper while walking down the sidewalks of New York City. The weather isn’t always sunny, so he often carries an umbrella along with the newspaper. He found it inconvenient to hold the paper with one hand and the umbrella with the other. So he decided to make something that would serve as an extra hand. Who hasn’t wished for an extra hand from time to time?

The Umbrella Article Holder has a strap, similar to a blood pressure cuff, that fits around either leg and lets you insert an umbrella so it stands straight up. After he created that, he decided something else should be added, so he created a device for the handle of the umbrella. It’s a square that covers half of your arm with a compartment to hold a coffee cup or a soda. Drinking his coffee, he decided to put a cigarette pack holder on it. And, of course, that led to needing a cigarette lighter near the pack, and for some reason a ballpoint pen. The pen might have led him to think of writing lists, because the next addition was a device that attaches to the arm square to hold a three-pound bag of groceries. And if you’re shopping for groceries, you might wear a coat—so he added a device that will hold a short coat, like a suit coat. And if you need a coat, it might be because it’s raining, so you need an umbrella … you get the idea.

It took Clarence three tries to get the first version to work with a curved- handled umbrella, making it fit without throwing the user off balance. Then he had to make a different version to fit straight-handled umbrellas.

Clarence had a factory in New York City make seven prototypes. They came out beautifully, but the cost was exorbitant—$152 for each unit. “I’d have to sell it for over $300. Who’s going to buy it for $300? Nobody. Unless I was a celebrity.” Then he went to the Yankee Invention Expo in Connecticut and met someone who said he could make it in China for under two dollars. “I couldn’t believe it. I thought he was playing a trick on me.

“I’ve lost over $50,000 on the last ten of my inventions. An innovator in Wisconsin put one on the Internet for two years. He was going to sell the product, but didn’t get a single call. I found out that it’s not worth it and decided that instead of playing it that way, I’d try this guy and spend my money in China. So I sent him one of the seven prototypes I had made. It took several months; I just got it a month ago … I had spent $800 to have Made in America labels made—now I can’t use those. I’ll be fined if I do. I’ll have to put the American labels aside and have the new manufacturer make a label that says Made in China.”

Clarence is now ready to mass-manufacture his Umbrella Article Holder. “At my age, I can’t keep playing around. I must get things moving or my ideas won’t get out. My wife wouldn’t know what to do with these inventions if I died. I’m getting frustrated. I’ve spent money for a number of years, and had no return. I just want to sell one of my inventions before I leave this world. Get paid and move on. That’s what I’m wishing for.”

Clarence believes in his Umbrella Article Holder. After all, it gives users a free hand. You’ve got to hand it to this inventor; he is the real article.