Читать книгу Midwives On Call At Christmas - Fiona McArthur - Страница 18
CHAPTER ELEVEN
ОглавлениеSIMON STOOD IN the shower and could feel the edges of panic clawing at him. And he couldn’t ease away by running back to Sydney Central work like he usually did because Maeve was getting close to having her baby. He had to be around in case anything happened.
This was certainly the time he usually left a relationship—way past it, in fact, as far as rapport between him and the woman went—except for the fact he would have been sleeping with her well and truly by now and that hadn’t happened with Tara. How on earth had the emotional stuff happened when they hadn’t even slept together? Everything was upside down. Back to front. And confusing.
Maybe it was proximity. Of course it was incredibly hard not to get closer than normal when you were living in the same house and working in the same place and associating with the same people.
Um, except he had lived with other women and not got too emotionally involved. And he had the horrible suspicion he’d miss Tara if he created the distance he needed—either mentally or geographically.
That was the scariest thing of all. It hadn’t happened before. He’d always felt the relationship was well and truly over by the time he began to see the signs of long-term planning on the side of his lady friend. Which was a good thing because that way he wasn’t responsible for hurting anyone.
But this was different. The unease fluttered again as he turned off the shower tap. Silly thoughts of birthday cakes in the future still made him smile but that was not the sort of thing to do if he was deep in a relationship with his next woman.
Listen to himself. He doubted he’d ever been deep into a relationship ever—more floating along the surface with good sex, and with women who were still his friends.
But right at this moment he was abstinent and sinking. No utopia after what had been a truly delightful afternoon yesterday with loads of potential—until that bloody lyrebird had said she was his true love and he’d panicked. Well, at least he had seen the danger before they’d completely consummated their relationship.
He combed his hair with his fingers and opened the steamy bathroom door. Oops. He’d been in here a while. But at least he’d come to some conclusion. All he needed to do was pull away. Create some distance and see how it felt.
His stomach rumbled and he headed for the kitchen as he continued to mull over his dilemmas.
He just needed to let Tara know subtly that he wasn’t a long-term prospect and then maybe they could just be friends. As in platonic. Hmm.
That brought up a whole new set of unpleasant dilemmas. If he and Tara were just friends that meant she could have other friends who were men. Maybe a lover. Someone else to take on her adventures. Someone else to do what he had knocked back. Strangely, not funny, idea at all.
He needed to think about that one.
‘Hi, Simon.’ He looked up from his preoccupation and saw a jeans-clad goddess.
‘Hi, Tara.’ He felt a smile spread across his face and then fall away as his previous conversations with himself came back.
‘You okay?’
‘Sure.’ Hitched his smile back up. ‘Of course. You?’
‘Fine.’ He could feel her concern. Saw her shrug.
‘Okay. I’m going for a ride. To see one of my clients. Then maybe further afield. See you later.’
‘Be safe.’
‘High on my list. Ciao.’
He called after her, ‘I didn’t know you spoke Italian?’
‘I don’t.’ She stopped. ‘Ciao and food items. Pizza, lasagne, boccioni.’ She shrugged. ‘The extent of my Italian. Anyway. See you.’
‘Bye. When are you back?’
She stopped again and sighed. ‘No idea.’
He opened his mouth to ask something else and closed it again. What was he doing? He lifted his hand to wave and turned away.
Geez. He was hopeless.
‘Simon?’ He spun back and she was there. Just behind him. And she was chewing on those gorgeous lips in a way that he wanted to touch her mouth with his fingers to stop her damaging anything.
‘It’s okay, Simon. I’m not expecting long term, you know. I’ll be moving on soon.’ She shook her head. ‘Just wanted to let you know.’
‘Me too,’ he said helplessly.
And then she spun on her heel and walked away quickly. He was still staring after her when he heard the bike start and the roar as she rode away.
So why didn’t he feel better? Basically she was saying they could have fun with no strings. Right up his alley. And he’d told her he felt the same. Liar.
When Tara drove into the driveway late in the afternoon of the next day Simon was sitting out at the manger, watching the animals.
She swung her helmet on her finger as she walked across the springy grass Louisa loved to water, and the smile he gave as she approached made the slight trepidation she’d started with worth the effort.
‘Looking particularly fetching there, Miss Tara.’
He sounded relaxed. Thank goodness for that. Until she’d given herself a stern talking to she’d been replaying the video of the dumb things she’d said in her head before she’d left. Dumb because she hadn’t needed to put them out there, though he’d agreed—not dumb because she hadn’t meant them, because she had. She sat down beside him on the bench and looked at the manger. ‘Hi, Simon.’
‘And what did you do today?’
She opened her eyes wide. ‘I’ve had a very nice day, thank you. I visited my two postnatal mums, then rode all the way to the lighthouse. Watched the parachutists float from the sky. It was very beautiful.’ Politely. ‘What did you do?’
‘I did a couple of hours for Dad in the general hospital while he took Mia to the airport to go visit a sick friend, and I had a decadent snooze this afternoon because I didn’t sleep well last night.’ He watched her face. ‘I guess you’re tired now?’
She looked at him over the top of sunglasses. ‘No, Mr Old Man. I’m not tired. I am young and enthusiastic for adventure at all times.’
‘Goody.’ He grinned. ‘And for the record that’s the second time you’ve called me an old man.’
‘Well, stop acting like one.’
He didn’t offer any answers to that one. ‘Trouble is I’m wide awake after my nap and could party all night. Got any ideas?’
She shrugged. ‘What sort of things? Nature? Dining? Dancing? Astronomy?’
‘Ah. Astronomy has potential.’
‘For what?’
‘Seeing stars.’
‘I could help you with that right now.’ She swung her helmet thoughtfully. He was teasing and it was fun. Until he said, ‘I wondered if you were into violence.’
She thought about some of the people she knew and the way their demons seemed to lead them to violence. The fun went out of it and she stood up. They were from such different worlds. ‘Nope. Much prefer to just walk away.’
She saw him reach out to stop her and then drop his hand and his mixed signals only confused her more.
Then he said, ‘Sorry. I don’t know what I said but I don’t want to ruin the mood. So, before you go, what I’ve really been doing is sitting here waiting to ask you to dinner. Louisa and Maeve have gone to Dad’s to stay overnight and mind the girls. I’d like to get dressed up and go on a date with you to the new restaurant down by the lake.’
She sat down again. ‘Oh.’ She looked at him. ‘A date?’
‘A fun date with a lady I like spending time with.’
She thought about that one. ‘Fun’, meaning ‘not serious’. Wasn’t that what she’d said she wanted, too? Hadn’t they both agreed on that yesterday morning? ‘Sure. I’d like that. What time?’
‘When you’re ready. I made a booking for six-thirty for seven.’ She raised her brows at his presumption but he was ahead of her. ‘It’s not heavily booked and they don’t mind if I cancel.’
She grinned at him. ‘You really are a thoughtful man.’
‘We old guys are like that.’
‘I don’t really think you’re old.’ She looked him over with mischief in her eyes. ‘Far too sexy for an old guy.’
‘Keep thinking that way. I thought we could have a drink before dinner at the bar, if you don’t mind walking there.’
‘Thank you. Sounds nice.’ She glanced at her watch. ‘I’d better have a shower and get changed, then.’
‘No rush.’
‘Sure. But I like to be on time. I was brought up that way.’
Simon watched her walk away, that sexy, determined little walk that had him squirming on his seat. And the crazy thing was she had no idea what she did to him. He wasn’t much better at guessing why she affected him like she did but tonight he’d come to the conclusion he was going to try to figure it out by taking it to the next level. Regardless of the risk.
The new restaurant was built on a little knoll overlooking the lake. The grounds were surrounded by a vibrant green hedge with a latched gate. The entry had been landscaped into lots of little rock pools and greenery with a wide wooden boardwalk winding through to get to the restaurant door. There was even a little bridge they had to climb up and over and Tara couldn’t keep the smile off her face. ‘This is gorgeous. I can’t believe it’s here and I didn’t know.’
‘They’ve only just opened. Mia told me about it when I asked her where I should take you.’
She looked at him. Surprised. ‘You told Mia we were going on a date?’
‘That’s what she said.’
Tara laughed. ‘Your family is funny.’ And gorgeous, but that was okay. She had settled a lot since her ride that afternoon. Decided that clarity came with enjoying the moment, not worrying about it. She was here with Simon now, and she was going to have a wonderful evening. ‘I’m starving.’
‘Excellent.’
They started with drinks at the bar, and behind the barman a huge window overlooked the water and showcased the sunset, and to the left a narrow curving terrace gave the diners a water view while they ate.
He watched Tara sigh with pleasure as she took a sip of her pina colada and gazed around. ‘This place is amazing.’
You’re amazing. He followed her gaze. Took in the colours on the lake. ‘It is great.’ He saw it through Tara’s shining eyes and acknowledged that he hadn’t let it soak in. He had been so busy with his thoughts and plans and second-guessing his own emotions he was missing the pleasure. Vowed to stop that right now. Vowed to enjoy the pleasure of company with the woman he wanted to be with—and be like Tara and enjoy things, without worrying about tomorrow. Imagine that!
It was easier than he expected when he tried it. Everything seemed suddenly brighter. Wow.
‘How’s your drink?’
She pretended to look at him suspiciously. ‘Why? You want some?’ So then he laughed. Because it was funny.
‘No, I don’t want some, Miss I’m-Not-Sharing. I have my own drink. Though mine doesn’t look as flashy as yours, with its slice of pineapple and pretty pink umbrella.’
She grinned. ‘Good. I’ve never had one before. And I like umbrellas.’ She offered him her straw. ‘But you can have a sip if you really want.’
I’ll sip later, he thought, and suddenly the night was alive with promise and joy, and the conversation took off as he let go of worrying about the past and the future and just experienced Tara’s company.
They flowed from the bar to their table, the most private one he could acquire, and the sun went down, as did the glorious seafood and the delightful sparkling wine in the bottle.
By the time he paid the bill they were both pleasantly mellow, and he had no hesitation in capturing her hand in his for the walk home around the lake.
The lake path from the restaurant to the hospital and Louisa’s house was lit by yellow globes that matched the moon and it was almost as bright as day as they ambled along.
This time when there was a rustle in the bushes Tara just smiled at the noise and carried on walking.
He glanced back to where the undergrowth still crackled. ‘So you’re not afraid of snakes in the bushes now?’
‘Nope.’ She squeezed his hand. ‘I’m going to believe it’s a lyrebird who can sound like a motorbike. If he wants to, of course.’
‘Of course.’ And Simon realised he had become decidedly more trusting about other facets of lyrebird lore. He stopped and she stopped too. He pulled her by the hand until she faced him and lifted his fingers to her cheek. ‘You look like a lake princess in the moonlight.’
She glanced up at the moon and the angles of her face shone like those of a perfectly carved silver goddess with the reflection of the moonlight shining Tara’s truth at him.
She was frowning at him, trying to read him, and goodness knew what was flashing across his face as his mind raced, because she looked a little unsure. ‘Thank you for the compliment. I like moonlit nights the best. Never been keen on the dark.’
He just wanted to hold her safe and never let her go. One day he would ask why she preferred to have a moonlit night than a dark one. Hopefully he would have the chance to ask.
He leant in and kissed her gently because if he did it properly he wouldn’t be able to stop and she didn’t deserve that, but she lifted her hands up and held his head there.
Tara kissed him back with a warmth and generosity he remembered from the lookout and for a few minutes there he forgot his good intentions. Until they heard some people coming along the path and he put her away from him.
That’s right. He had no intention of seducing Tara in a park. ‘Let’s go home now.’
There was something in the way he said ‘home now’ that sent a whisper of promise across Tara’s skin. Home. Together. Now. That last kiss had been different, wonderful and absolutely intoxicating. Lucky Simon had heard the people coming because she’d been deaf to the world.
They were walking quite fast now. Seemed he’d decided caution was overrated and that was okay. Seriously okay because, no matter what, she wanted to sleep with this gorgeous, sexy, kind man at least once. She was not going to regret not spending time with Simon for the rest of her life. It might be her last chance.
Louisa and Maeve had gone to Mia’s so they would be alone and that removed that last of her resistance, if she’d had any.
Simon held her hand tightly as they walked even more quickly along the lit path. She resisted the urge to run.