Читать книгу A Healing Legend: Wisdom from the Four Directions - Garry Flint - Страница 6

Now only one simple square of logs occupied the area under the boulder. The hands of children had created the small structure of piled branches and other debris—a play fort. A lone boy was standing in the center of the fort. He would occasionally crane his neck and stare up at the leaning boulder. He looked worried.

“What if that huge boulder rolled down the hill and crashed into the fort?” he said aloud to himself. Shaking his head, he busied himself tucking bits of grass into the cracks between the logs. He’d learned at school that the pioneers had chinked their log homes in this way. He liked copying the pioneers. His great, great, great grandfather had been a pioneer. Kidd was named after him as his grandfather had been. Kidd’s grandfather was a gifted gardener, famous for his roses, and he was also a war hero. Kidd didn’t know much about being a gifted gardener, but he thought a lot about being a war hero. That was cool.

Today he was feeling restless and out of sorts. It was one of those ‘what if ’ days. He felt anxious and jittery like he did after watching a scary movie late at night when his parents weren’t at home. It was when Kidd felt this way that the ‘what ifs’ began bugging him—like, what if that great big rock started to roll down the hillside when he was playing in the forest below. He would look at the rock and think,What if? But even though he felt this unknown fear, it didn’t stop him from playing in the fort he and his friends had built. Today he was alone and the ‘what ifs’ were even stronger, so strong he could hardly think.

And there were other ‘what ifs’ that followed him around. What if the monster from the deep came up out of the drain in the middle of the sidewalk when he was walking by the drain? What if he wasn’t able to stop the monster and it destroyed his house and all the houses around the neighborhood? What if his mother opened the refrigerator door and the monster was in there waiting? Oh, that one gave him goose bump shivers!

Sometimes Kidd liked the ‘what ifs’ and the shivery excitement of his imagination and it was fun to think about scary stuff. But today was one of those days—the ‘what ifs’ were giving him the creeps. Sometimes when he felt like this the ‘what ifs’ bothered him for a long time.

The next day when Kidd went to school, he was still so creeped out by the ‘what ifs’ that he couldn’t pay attention at all. He got into trouble because the teacher asked him a question and he didn’t know what she asked him. Then the rest of the kids laughed at him, especially that mean bully Alfred.

At lunch time the kids all called him stupid and then Billy the Kid.

“My name is Kidd,” he yelled back at them.

“Billy the Kid, Billy the Kid,” Alfred taunted in a very loud voice while strutting around the playground. Everyone was laughing.

Kidd got so mad. He gritted his teeth and tried to count to ten, but Alfred kept circling around him, jeering. Finally, Kidd couldn’t take it any more! He pushed Alfred.

Everyone around them suddenly got silent. The ring of schoolchildren dispersed as a teacher approached.

“Kidd!” the teacher exclaimed. “No fighting or bullying on the school grounds!”

“It was a...an accident,” Kidd stammered. “I tripped...

I...”

“You did not, Kidd. You pushed Alfred.”

All the other children were gone, even Alfred. Kidd was alone with the teacher. His cheeks blazed with embarrassment. He looked at the ground and said nothing.

“You’re on notice, Kidd,” the teacher said firmly. “If this happens again you will be put on report, and you know what that means!” The teacher glowered at Kidd for another moment and then saw Alfred trying to take a little girl off one of the swings. “Alfred...” the teacher called out sharply and walked swiftly in the direction of the swing set.

Kidd felt a prickle of tears behind his eyes. If he was put on report, that would mean the principal and his parents would be involved. Then he would be in big trouble. What if he got put on report, then what? More ‘what ifs.’ How could he ever explain to grown-ups about the ‘what ifs’?

The biggest problem was all this fear that was knotting him up inside. The knots were the reason why he couldn’t pay attention in class. He sniffed, then rubbed his nose with his hand. What if he got put on report? He wanted more than anything to ask about that. But how could he talk about it? How could he tell anyone about all the fears that followed him around in his head?