Читать книгу Wit and Wisdom of Lord Tredegar - Godfrey Charles Morgan - Страница 5

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I would rather trust and be deceived, than be found to have suspected falsely.

Reduction of Armaments Meeting, Newport,

March 17th, 1899.

Some people will not go across a street to hear an oratorio, though they would go many miles to listen to that very entertaining melody, "Whoa, Emma!"—and I'm not sure that I shouldn't be one of them.—

Tredegar Show.

November 26th, 1879.

The other day I was doing a little bit of horse-cropping—I'm fond of that sort of thing—and went into an Irish dealer's yard, where I saw a horse which grunted very much. Looking at the dealer, I said, "The horse is a roarer," and the Irishman replied: "Ah, no, me lord, not a bit of it. I've 'ad 'im from two years ould, an' e' 'ad wunce a most desprit froight, an' 'e's 'ad the hiccups ever since!"

Tredegar Show,

November 26th, 1879.

"'E's 'ad the hiccups ever since!"

I do not think there is a man in England who has more at heart than myself the religious education of children. In 1839 the Chartist Riots took place at Newport. In the following year National Schools were opened, and I believe that had the men who took part in these riots received the education imparted at the National Schools they would never have decided upon such a misguided course of action.

Jubilee of Newport National Schools,

May 16th, 1890.

"You need not wear anything."

I was rather alarmed when I received the notice, "Peach Blossom Fancy Dress Fair," and I telegraphed at once to a lady who I thought knew what was going on and asked, "Am I obliged to come in fancy dress?" The answer I got was, "You need not wear anything."

Llangibby Church Fete,

August, 1910.

I generally pay great attention to what a clergyman says, but you cannot always take the advice of a clergyman. A certain man had a dog, and his minister told him that he had better sell the dog and get a pig, to which the man replied, "A pretty fool I should look going rat-catching with a pig."

St. Paul's Garden Fete, Newport,

June 23rd, 1910.

Without some sort of religion no man can be happy.

St. Paul's Garden Fete, Newport,

June 23rd, 1910.

I am not accustomed to begging, being more accustomed to being begged of. That is one of the hereditary privileges of members of the House of Lords.

Meeting in connection with the new Infirmary for Newport,

March 17th, 1897.

It appears to me that my good qualities increase in proportion as the hair comes off the top of my head, and it is well that in proportion as we grow less ornamental we should grow more useful.

Tredegar Show,

November 29th, 1876.

I really think I must be out of place here. You know I am one of the hereditary nonentities. I cannot help the hereditary part of the business, and I have tried all my life to avoid the other.

South Monmouthshire Conservative Association,

December 22nd, 1909.

You ought, of course, to learn something about ancient art, or you will be like a certain Lord Mayor of whom I have heard. One day he received a telegram from some people who were carrying on excavations in Greece, and who had discovered a statue by Phidias. They thought, in common with most foreigners, that the Lord Mayor was the most powerful person in the kingdom—abroad he is supposed to rule the country. Anyway, they sent him a telegram saying "Phidias is recovered." The Lord Mayor wired back that he was pleased to hear it, but that he did not know that Phidias had been unwell.

Art School Prize Distribution, Newport,

December 12th, 1899.

"You can do a man to death with a piano."

A noted musician, when asked whether he thought it was right to carry out capital punishment, replied: "No; because you can do a man to death with a piano."

At Llandaff,

June 26th, 1900.

I believe I have laid more foundation stones than any other man in England. I have mallets and trowels sufficient to supply, I believe, every Parish Church in the country. They are very handsome and ornamental, and I hope I shall have more of them.

Foundation Stone Laying, St. John's Church, Cardiff,

March 12th, 1889.

"I believe I have laid more foundation stones than any other man in England."

We (agriculturists) are looked upon as a long-suffering and patient race, and some of the manufacturing class think we are fit subjects for bleeding. In fact, it has been said that agriculturists are like their own sheep, inasmuch as they can bear a close shaving without a bleat; whereas the manufacturers are like pigs; only touch their bristles and they will "holler like the devil."

Tredegar Show,

December 17th, 1867.

Lord Rosebery is alternately a menace and a sigh.

Conservative Dinner, Newport,

November 15th, 1895.

We have had an old-fashioned winter, and I do not care if I never see another. The only people, I fancy, who have enjoyed the winter are the doctors and the Press.

Servants' Ball, January 16th, 1891.