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April 1978

One afternoon in June, the boss called me into his office. The result of our dialogue was, “You’ll be much happier with the next company.” I was fired.

This employer, nine years ago, had given me every oppor­tunity to straighten out my drinking problem. He was overjoyed at the change in me through AA and had promoted me several times during my sobriety. But there had been an organizational change, and my job no longer existed.

How could this happen to a good guy like me? Some tears fol­lowed for my sorely bruised ego. A conversation with my sponsor assured me that my worth as a human being has nothing to do with a job. Was he right? I believed it in my heart, but my stomach wasn’t sure.

The self-knowledge and spiritual awakenings gained through work with the Twelve Steps enabled me to go on without a break in stride. The boss was considerate. The organizational change did not take place for three to four months, and I was invited to stay on till then. I decided to show them. I dived into the job search and almost landed a terrific position back in the hometown. The dis­appointment was bitter at coming in second. My sponsor told me that God does not sober you up to throw you on the woodpile.

Sent out 300 resumes. Lots of activity, some interviews, no job offers. The sponsor said that you don’t get any cross to bear without the strength to carry it. I knew from experience this was correct. Why did I need to be reassured all the time? Thank God for sponsors and the Fellowship.

I was stripped of responsibility at work. Everyone was whispering about me behind my back. One day at a time. The sponsor promised that wherever I wound up, it would be where I was supposed to be, and better. I doubled up on prayer and meditation to an hour a day.

Time was up! Then, a last-minute extension to the first of the year working on special projects at half salary. Could I take it? Yes, one day at a time. Add another half hour to meditation, and be grateful. The sponsor said the reprieve was probably connected to the increased prayer and work on the program. I thought so, too.

Sent out 400 resumes. Some activity, some interviews, elec­tions, holidays, and no job offers. I was starting to worry about money, but I knew I had what I needed. When would this end? The Serenity Prayer was a great help.

Unemployed and a statistic! I wasn’t alone. Lots of AAs had gone through this sober. They came forward to offer support. I stood in the unemployment line for three hours. I increased my work with others and stayed close to newcomers. A new moral inventory revealed a lot of resentments and problems over work. Was being fired an answer to my prayers? Be careful what you pray for—you might get it.

Sent out 400 more resumes. Back to the hometown to renew old friendships and business acquaintances. All the people I thought I would never need. You do meet the same people going down as coming up. Please, God, don’t let me forget this lesson. People were kind. They seemed to understand they could be on the other side of the desk some day. Why didn’t I ever think of that?

A break—an outstanding job! They said bring the wife down. Then a last-minute phone call: Sorry, we decided to pro­mote from within. The sponsor said that if I was meant to have that job, I would have gotten it. Thy will be done!

Ten months later. No job, but making it a day at a time. The Big Book is right; sobriety can be maintained with or without a job. A job is a circumstance. A job is not a survival matter like sobriety. Everyone gets a job sooner or later. My faith was being tested. Had God misplaced my file? Was I a failure? No, God has a perfect plan for me. This process has given me a closeness to people and God that would not have been possible otherwise. My life is continuing to change steadily for the better.

Several weeks later, I landed a good job. My wife and I have relocated and are comfortable in our new area . The program is the same, and we look forward to going on from here. Without a doubt, this has been the most significant sober living experience of my life.

If I work my program, I will be okay. All my experience says, exactly as the Big Book states, I get everything I need in Alcoholics Anonymous. And when I get what I need, I invariably find that it was just what I wanted all the time.

B. K., Freeport, Ill.