Читать книгу Chasing the King of Hearts - Ханна Кралль - Страница 23

Armchair. Another Stupid Mistake

Her plans for old age turn out to be unrealistic.

She won’t read books because she’ll lose her eyesight. She won’t listen to records because she’ll be hard of hearing. She won’t go on walks because her lower vertebrae will pinch her lumbar nerves . . .

Her granddaughter, the gallery owner, could come and tell her about contemporary art.

Her other granddaughter, the cultural historian, could tell her about the cultures of the world.

Her third granddaughter will be in the army.

But because Izolda doesn’t know Hebrew she’ll never learn about contemporary art or what will happen to the cultures of the world. Her soldier granddaughter will visit her when she’s on leave. She’ll take off her boots, put down her rifle, sit on the sofa, and fall asleep right away. Izolda will cover up her granddaughter with a plaid blanket and say in Polish: Śpij, dziecko—Sleep, child. And when she awakes, her granddaughter will get dressed up and run to meet a boy, who’s very handsome even though he has a large ring under his lip. Izolda would like to ask if the ring doesn’t get in the way of kissing, but once again she can’t remember the Hebrew word for ring. (The plaid blanket she’ll use to cover her granddaughter will be light and soft but warm, with a colorful pattern, just like another, very different plaid blanket. She’ll try to tell her granddaughter about that blanket, only she won’t be able to. That one felt safe, peaceful, secure, but what kind of safety can there be in the Israeli army?)

She’ll sit down in her armchair.

She’ll start to think. That’s all she can do anymore. And then she’ll remember another stupid mistake. For instance, how could she have put his parents and sisters in with other Jews? The setup was fine, the widow who owned the apartment was an honest woman; the only problem was that her parents had to share it with a young married couple. Both had good papers and decent looks, but the husband was circumcised. Izolda should have found a different flat, with an uncircumcised Jew. Although even an uncircumcised Jew would have been found out (for instance, by running into an acquaintance on the street). She should have avoided places where there were any other Jews at all. Maybe, if she’d asked the policeman from the rickshaw for an apartment without Jews . . . Of course they would have died anyway. (They would have taken shelter in the basement during the Warsaw Uprising and been killed by bombs.) Oh well, she’ll console herself, next time I’ll be smarter. What am I babbling about, she catches herself, what next time?