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ENJOYING SELF-SUSTAINED DEPRESSION
ОглавлениеHow long ago was it when you had a good belly laugh at yourself for not remembering why your hat is in your hand and you’re in front of the refrigerator? Little things are not as important as hearing an old song that brings back memories of the first date with your life time mate, and tears appear from nowhere. After all the refrigerator is before you and the memory is only sixty plus years ago. Things you never noticed before such as songs, smells, and sights trigger the brain and bring back important memories that are more important than the present. Today doesn’t appear to be special until you see tomorrow, and now today is only a memory along with the extra special days and nights of the past. Time passes and the daily routine of life doesn’t dim the pain and joy that memories bring, and sometimes the past is more enjoyable than the present.
World War II is over and the world is starting to recover and getting some of the bad memoirs behind and looking for a bright future. I met my wife to be at work, she was a telephone operator and I was a central office telephone equipment installer. We worked the night shift and I ask her one morning if she would like a ride home, and she said yes. She was living with her parents and brothers and sisters in a home close to the school. This broke the ice and I ask about a date as we both had the weekend off, she agreed and we went dancing. We dated off and on until my job was finished and was transferred to a town close by. I was on the day shift and she was working nights, that left the time between 5 PM and 11 PM open for us to see each other which we did every other day. As time went by I felt more and more comfortable with her and I was transferred 500 miles away. I made this trip on weekends just to be with her for such a short time made being apart was rough. I receive a transfer so I was only about 250 miles from her and working night shift and still making the weekend trips. One Wednesday in November about 3 AM, I phoned her and ask what she was doing this coming weekend, she replied nothing for sure. I said would you like to get married Saturday? The phone was silent and the reply I wanted finely came. We made our plans and this was the beginning of our life time together.
The marriage was performed by the church pastor in front of the fireplace in her home. A brother in law was my best man and her older sister was her bride’s maid. There was a reception after the service and we departed for our honey moon. We didn’t get very far as money was short and we both had to be back at work Monday night. We did get the bridal suit for the night, and the lights went out rather early. The next morning when I awoke, I heard her in the shower. I went right into the shower with her and said this is the beginning of our life together and there is to be nothing we don’t know about each other from this day forward. I’ll wash your back and you wash mine, and that was the way things were until the morning she passed away.
I was transferred to a location close enough for a daily commute. This is when I found out the love of my life was no cook, she did not do the cooking at home because with three brothers and six sisters and a mother and father there was no experimenting with food. This made meals at home were not a great experience and not a great topic of discussion. Our first wedding anniversary went by and five days later our first son, Adam was born, I had spent that day walking a picket line as I was out on strike. When I reached home my wife said she had talked with her mother about how she felt, thought it was gas. She told me her mother didn’t think so, she said it was delivery time. I said after three boys and seven girls I believe your mother knows what she is talking about, so to the hospital we went. Adam arrived at 10:30 PM that night healthy and loud. My wife made a great mother and she had more time for her culinary expertise, which was wonderful. The next year or so I was moved a number of times over the state of Texas to job locations, commuting when possible or made it home on weekends. A job opened close to home with no traveling with a large company, I applied for it and was hired. My wife was back at work but not for long.
August presented us our second boy, Bill strong and healthy. The decision was made for my wife to stay home and leave her job as there was too much to take care of two boys and a home and me. My wife taught Sunday school and attended Church with the boys every week. I worked a rotating shift and attended when I could.
One of our church members told me of a house that would be for sale soon, if I was interested and I told him I was and made arrangements for my wife and I to look it over. The house was an answer to problems we were having at that time with me sleeping during the day and the kids in the house making noise. Our friend told us he was working on his Real Estate Licenses and he needed the experience he would not charge us the usual fee, this made it possible for us to make the down payment. When we moved in there was so much room after living in apartments for so long, but that was to change as in July we were presented a girl, Edith perfect and loud as the boys. This house had a detached garage where I built me a bedroom, away from the house, so the kids could be kids and a mother could be a mother. And mother she did, when I was working the graveyard shift ever now and then, she would put the kids to bed early. She would come out to my bedroom climb into bed; these were times when physical love brings a man and woman to understand the true meaning of marital union.
These are the beginning of many happy memories to remember and they can cause depression deep and dark because they will not happen again ….
With a family total of five we found the kitchen to small so the first expansion began. A wall was removed and six feet were added to the back of the house and this allowed access to the back bedroom. Later the south bedroom received an extension and a deck was also added. This allowed more of the cooking to be out of the kitchen, which my wife appreciated and enjoyed as I did most of the outside cooking. And things were great as life was good and a routine was set. House payment, a second car payment, food and clothing were no problem, but things were close. All good things come to an end, I was notified in a short time my job would be automated and I would be moved to a different department. This move caused a fifty percent reduction in my pay. My wife took the news in stride and we set up things in priory and eliminate some things the family could do without, but there was no way we could stretch a pay check that much. The small saving we had been gone in a short time the insurance policies were the next things to go.
The move out into the plant allowed me to make contact with all the working crews, as I was on the Job Evaluation for the union, most of the employees knew me. The next election I was voted in as Vice-President, and also on the grievance committee for the union. There was an agreement made between the company and union to create an apprentice program in the craft jobs in the plant. I applied for an opening for a welder along with others and I got one of the openings. This change meant there would be an increase in pay as I progressed in the program. Later on the local union president was moved to a job with the international union, and I was made local union president. In the being move to the apprentice program I was working the day shift and this made the life at home more enjoyable as the kids weren’t noise problems now? However the union position requires me to hold meetings at the union hall and with the company at the plant on grievances and job evolution and meeting in other locations for union business. The union members thought we should start a credit union, so we approached the company reprehensive and he agreed. Nine of the committee put up five dollars each and applied for an Organization Certificate from the Bureau of Federal Credit Unions and were formed on January 22, 1970. The time for the election of local union officers came up and I didn’t want to run for the presidency of the local as I have a plate full at home. There were some good times and some that were not so good.
Time passes so fast, and with the family growing up things like this happen that is part of life. Adam the oldest boy was riding his bicycle and was hit by a car, luckily he wasn’t injured very bad, and he learned a lesson to look both ways at all intersections, and he still does as to day. Later Bill injured his knee and had surgery performed, and he liked being taken care of and it was a problem getting him to exercise but it was necessary to recover. I was beginning to think appendicitis was contagious as my wife, Bill and Edith all had the operation in a period of six months. When it rains - it pours. There is one thing I can say, “Thanks for the insurance the Union negotiated for with the company, it was a life saver.” Without the insurance at this time I would probably be deep in debt for a long time to come. When my wife had her operation it was during the summer and the kids were out of school and old enough to take care of themselves while I was at work.
I will stop for a while and take care of the graves of my grandfather, and grandmother, my mother and father, my wife and my daughter. This break will let me get outside and also being there will bring back memories both good and bad that could bring on depression or not. The following will be in random order as the memories return as they come back and not in calendar time.