Читать книгу Your 168 - Harry M. Kraemer Jr. - Страница 18

I am often asked by students and executives alike: how do you know if you are really self-reflective and becoming self-aware? At the risk of being morbid, I tell the following story: imagine for a moment that after your annual physical, your doctor wants to meet with you. “I've been going through the results of your tests,” the doctor tells you, “and I'm going to be honest with you: you only have three days to live.”

Facing your imminent mortality, would you start feeling regret about what you wished you'd done differently? Are there people you've become estranged from? Do you regret broken relationships? Are you consumed with anger and resentment? Do you feel remorse for having taken advantage of someone? Then why not avoid all that now!

All of us are going to have three last days—we just don't know when they're going to be. Self-reflection helps us identify those areas in our lives we need to repair now. We own up to past mistakes, make amends where we can, forgive ourselves and others, and make the most of the time we have. Moving forward, we commit to treating people exactly as we would like to be treated (they don't call it the Golden Rule for nothing). Self-reflection can give you the peace of mind that you are sincerely trying to do the best you can every day, while being accountable to yourself for where and how you can do better.

Your life won't be perfect, but I guarantee it will get better. You will have more gratitude during the good times, because self-reflection will help you pause and be thankful. You'll have more peace of mind and clarity during challenging times, because you're committed to doing the right thing and doing the best you can do. Your worry, fear, anxiety, pressure, and stress will be greatly reduced, although not eliminated—welcome to being human! And there are folks who say a little bit of pressure may be helpful for getting things done. Unfortunately, that “little bit” of pressure can often become a lot and affect your health. But if you hunger for a life with more balance among those things that mean the most to you, self-reflection should become a regular habit.

Self-reflection isn't about perfection. You won't be perfectly balanced every day or even most days. We have busy lives and many things vie for our time and attention. Priorities change and challenges arise.

There is no formula or perfect answer to achieving life balance. It's a constant process of recalibration. Week to week as you look at your 168 hours, you'll see where you are in balance and out of balance. You'll make choices going forward to rebalance—more time with family, doing better with daily exercise, spending time with friends you haven't seen in a while. But our lives are too busy and complex to expect that we'll always be in balance. There will always be things that force us out of balance again.

Self-reflection, I've found, is the best foundation for creating and sustaining life balance. This is not the pursuit of perfection, but of greater self-awareness. When we know where and how we're spending our time, when things are going well or when we feel we're going off the rails, we can find a way forward.