Читать книгу The Lovers Assistant; Or, New Art of Love - Генри Филдинг, Henry Fielding - Страница 3

BOOK I

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If in so learned an Age as this, when Arts and Sciences are risen to such Perfection, there be any Gentleman unskilled in the Art of Loving, let him come to my School; where, if he hath any Genius, he will soon become an Adept: For I would by no means have any young Gentlemen think, that Erudition is unnecessary upon this Occasion. It is well known that the 2Rules of Art are necessary to the Conduct of a Ship; for which reason, none but able and experienced Seamen are preferred to the Command of one. Rules are necessary even to make a good Coachman, as those Gentlemen who have the Ambition to excel this way very well know. In the same manner is Art required to drive the Chariot of Love well. Now it hath pleased Venus to place me in the Coach-Box: what a Captain is to a Ship, or the Driver to his Chariot, that am I to Love. I own indeed Master Cupid is a little wild, and often stubborn; but he is only a Child, and of an Age to be disciplined: And however fierce the Disposition of a Lad may be, a judicious Schoolmaster knows very well how to correct it: For many a Boy who hath afterwards turned out a Hero, hath when at School very patiently submitted to the Lash, and quietly, at the Word of Command, held out his Hands to be whipt 3. Duke William 4 himself, when a Lad, very possibly submitted to Correction; and he 5 who was hereafter to become the Terror of his Enemies, might in his Youth have been afraid of his Tutor. Mr. Pointz was his Preceptor: I am the Preceptor of Love. Both these Youths were of a fierce Disposition, both elevated 6 in their Birth. But as the stoutest Ox submits himself to the Yoke, and the most fiery Horse to the Bridle, so shall Love to me. Though he may bend his Bow against my Breast, and shake his Torches at me; no matter: nay, the more he pierces me with his Arrows, the more he burns me, the more severely will I be revenged of him.

But here, Master Apollo, I will tell no lies to my Readers. I do not pretend to have received any Inspiration from you, any more than from Parson Whitefield 7: And as for Miss Clio 8 and her eight Sisters, I never visit them; nor have I even a Cap-Acquaintance with them. I write from Experience only; and Experto crede Roberto is my Motto. I promise my Readers that I will tell them truth; and if I must, for form sake, invoke any Muse, Venus herself shall be the Person 9. Sweet Goddess! then be thou present, and smile at my Undertaking. But as for you who cannot smile, I mean you, Prudes, with your screw'd Faces, which may be considered as Signs hung forth before the Door of Virtue, and which perhaps, like other Signs, promise what is not to be found in the House; I desire neither your Favour nor your Company. Good-natur'd Girls10 are all I write to; and such I promise them may read my Works without a Blush.

Know then, my good Scholar, that art unexperienced in the Art of Love, that this Art consists of three principal Points: First, to select a proper Mistress: Secondly, to win her Affections: And, Thirdly, to preserve your mutual Affection. Of all these therefore we will treat; or, to speak metaphorically, through these three Roads we will drive the Chariot we have undertaken to guide.

First then as to the Choice of a Mistress, to whom you may say, In Thee alone my choice is fixed. Do not believe such a one will fall into your Lap. It will become you to look about sharp for her, and with all your Eyes, I do assure you. And here my first Instruction shall be, where she may most probably be found: For he is a bad Huntsman who would beat about the Royal Exchange for a Hare or a Fox; and not a much better Gunner or Fisherman, who goes a shooting in Somerset-Gardens, or attempts to angle in the magnificent Bason there. As these all know the Places where their Game resort, so must you.

Here then, I by no means advise you to make a long Voyage after a foreign Mistress, as Perseus did, who fetched Andromeda11 from the Indies; or Paris, whom nothing would serve but a Grecian Mistress. Your own Country, my Friend, will produce Women which the World cannot equal. Beauties are as plenty in the City of London as Apples in12 Herefordshire, or Grains of Wheat13 in Hampshire; they are indeed as plenty as Fish in the Sea, or Birds in the Air; nay, the Sky hath not more Stars than London hath Beauties: for England14, not Cyprus, is the Queen of Love's favourite Island. Whether you love green Fruit, and which is in the Bud only, or Beauty in its fuller Bloom, or that which is arrived to perfect Ripeness; nay, if nothing but Wisdom or Sagacity will serve your turn, of these too Old England will afford you a sufficient Plenty.

In the pleasant Month of May, repair to Vaux-Hall15. Here take your Evening Walk, either round the verdant Scenes, where Nightingales, the only Foreigners who give us their Songs for nothing, warble their most delicious Notes. When your Limbs demand Repose, you may enjoy it in an Alcove, from whence the embattel'd Troops of Venus will pass in review before you. Again, the lofty Dome of Ranelagh invites your Steps. Whether the illustrious Artist took his Model from that House, which as a Reward for their Industry, or for some little regard for their Honey, the benevolent Nature of Man hath conferred on that laborious Animal the Bee: Or whether a more pious Disposition chose this Form from the musical Instrument which summons the whole Parish to Church: Or whether the wondrous Force of Genius, unassisted by any Model, did not of itself strike out this wondrous Architecture; let Kent or Benson inquire. Hither, from every Corner of the Town, repair the loveliest Nymphs. Here too thou may'st survey them, either walking or reposed on Benches at thy Ease. Nor is the Mall to be neglected, where once die brawny Arm of Charles displayed its Strength, and beat his subtle Courtiers at the Play, whence it derives its Name. Nor, Kensington, must thy Gardens be passed by, once the Delight of mighty Caroline, and to the future Age a Monument of her Taste. Here the Charmers draw in sweet Air, and send it forth again in sweeter Sighs, as Tributes to the loved Memory of that mighty Queen. As for the Ring, formerly the Scene of Beauty's many Triumphs, it is now become a lonely deserted Place: Brilliants and brilliant Eyes no longer sparkle there: No more the heedless Beau falls by the random Glance, or well-pointed Fan. The Ring is now no more: Yet Ruckholt, Marybone and The Wells survive; Places by no means to be neglected by the Gallant: for Beauty may lurk beneath the Straw Hat, and Venus often clothes her lovely Limbs in Stuffs. Nay, the very Courts of Law are not excluded; and the Scenes of Wrangling are sometimes the Scenes of Love. In that Hall where Thames sometimes overflowing, washes the Temple of Venus Lucy, the grave Serjeant becomes a Victim to the Fair; and he who so well knows how to defend others, cannot defend himself. Here the Special Pleader loses all Power to Demurr, and finds beyond his Expectation a novel Assignment spring up in the Cause. Him Venus Lucy16 laughs at from her neighbouring Temple; for the Council is now become the Client, and squeezes an empty Hand harder than he ever did a full one. But above all, the Theatres are the Place of Sport: for these will be most fruitful to your Wishes. Here you will find one Object to love, and another to toy with. Some, of whom a single Touch will suffice, and others, in whom you will desire a stronger Tenure. Neither do the Ants in pursuit of Grain, or the Bees in quest of Flowers, swarm in greater Numbers than the Beauties to the Theatres. The variety of Charmers here have often distracted my Choice. Hither they come to see, and to be themselves seen; and many are the Love-Bargains here made.

And now, Friend, I will tell you a Story. Romulus was the first Person who ever made this use of the Theatre, when he ordered his Soldiers to fall foul on the Sabine Ladies, whom he invited to a Play acted by his Command. Not that I would have you think, that Theatre was like the Playhouse in Convent-Garden, enriched with Scenes, Machines, and other Decorations. To say the truth, it was no better than a Barn, or Booth. Here he assembled the Sabine Girls, and ordered his Romans to chuse every Man his Miss. They did so, and while the poor Girls thought no Harm, those Fellows felt strange Emotions within. Now while a certain Dancer, called, The Ludio, was performing a Tambourine, which I suppose took greatly at that time, Romulus on a sudden gave the Signal for falling on. This was instantly obeyed. They all rushed in, laid their Hands upon the Girls, and soon gave them sufficient Tokens of their Purpose.

As the Doves, who are the most timorous of Birds, fly from Eagles; or as the young Lamb runs from Wolves, as soon as she sees them, so terrified were these Ladies, at the Men rushing upon them, in this unlawful manner. The Colour forsook their Cheeks at once. All were equally in a Fright, though they discovered their Fear by different Symptoms. Some of them tear their Hair, others sit in Amazement, Terror strikes some dumb, others call in vain for the Assistance of their Mammas. One cries out, another is shocked to death; one stands still, another endeavours to get out of the House. But all their Endeavours are vain; and perhaps indeed their Blushes heightened their Beauty; they were all led off, and those who would not go were carried. Methinks, I hear one of their Gallants thus addressing his weeping Fair. Why, my Dear, will you spoil those lovely Eyes with Tears? I promise you, you shall be served no worse than your Mother hath been before. I will only do to you, what your Father did to her. Ah Romulus! Romulus! no General ever better knew how to reward his Soldiers; I promise you, that when I hear your Drum beating up for Voluntiers, I will enlist under your Command.

Ever since that time, the Theatre hath been consecrated to Love, and many a pretty Girl, since the Sabines, hath owed the Loss of her Maidenhead to it.

Other Places of publick Meeting may likewise be frequented, as Horse Races17 and the Like. And especially public Shews, which never fail of Women. Here get upon a crouded Scaffold, and sit next to the Girl you like. Squeeze yourself as close to her as you can; for Custom here countenances such squeezing whether the pretty Creatures will or no. Here find some Opportunity to begin a Discourse; you will not be driven to talk upon your Fingers, or by Signs, but may use your Tongue[B]. Begin then with News, or the Chitchat of the Town. Nay, the Shew itself will afford a Subject: for instance supposing it was my Lord Mayor's Shew, you may ask her what Alderman that Coach, or those Liveries belong to; and be sure to admire the same with herself: Do not omit moreover, to give her an early Intimation of your Gallantry, and that you are a Woman's Man. If it should happen that any one of the Aldermen should be a greater Cuckold than the rest of his Brethren; take care to titter at his Appearance; and while the Pageants18

2

Here Ovid uses the Examples of Automedon, who was the Coachman of Achilles; and of Tiphys, who was Pilot or Steersman to the Argonauts.

3

This is a literal Translation; by which it appears this barbarous Custom of whipping Boys on the Hands, till they look as if they had the Itch, was used by the Roman Schoolmasters as well as by ours.

4

The Original introduces Achilles, who was the pupil of Chiron.

5

In the Original, —held forth at his Master's Commands those Hands to be whipt, which Hector was hereafter to feel. The Indelicacy of which Image we have avoided applying to our British Hero.

6

Both born of a Goddess.

7

This is transferred, we hope not improperly from Roman to British Superstition. The Latin alludes to Augury, and very justly ridicules the Folly of Divination by the Flight of Birds.

8

Nor were Clio or her Sisters seen by me, while I tended a Flock in the Valleys of Ascra. This Ascra was a Valley near the Helicon, which was the Residence of the Parents of Hesiod. Now Hesiod was fabled, whilst he was keeping his Father's Sheep, to have been led by the Muse to the Fountain Hippocrene; and being, I suppose, well ducked in that Water, commenced Poet.

9

This whole Passage is a manifest Burlesque on the Invocations with which the Ancients began their Poems. Not very different is that Sneer at the Beginning of the Metamorphosis,

– Dii, caeptis, (NAM VOS MUTASTIS ET ILLAS) Adspirate

But the strongest Piece of Burlesque of this kind is the Invocation to Venus at the Beginning of Lucretius: For what can be more so than a solemn Application to a Deity for her Assistance in a Work, the professed Intention of which is to expose the Belief of any Deity at all; and more particularly of any Concern which such superior Beings might be supposed to take in the Affairs of Men. For my own part, I must confess, I cannot perceive that graceful Air of Enthusiasm which a noble Author observes in the Invocation of the Antients; many of them indeed seem to have been too apparently in jest, to endeavour to impose on their Readers, and in reality to apply to the Muses with less Devotion than our modern Poets, many of whom perhaps believe as much in those Deities as in any other.

10

Ovid would here insinuate, that the Courtezans only were the Subjects of the ensuing Poem; and in his Tristibus he cites these Lines, and pleads them in his Defence: But he is not over-honest in his Profession; for in many Parts it appears, that his Instructions are calculated for much more than concessa furtia.

11

Andromeda was the Daughter of Cepheus King of Aethiopia and of Cassiope. Her Mother having offended the Nereids, by contending with them for Superiority in Beauty, Neptune, at their Petition, sent a Sea-Monster, which greatly annoyed the Aethiopians. Upon this they consulted the Oracle of Jupiter Ammon, who ordered them to expose one of the Progeny of Cepheus and Cassiope to be devoured by the Monster. Andromeda was accordingly ty'd to a Rock, where she was espied by Perseus, who killed the Monster, and rescued the Lady; for which he received her at the Hands of her Parents as his Reward. The Story is told in the 4th Book of the Metamorphosis.

12

Bunches of Grapes in Methymna; a City of Lesbia, the Wine of which Country was famous among the Ancients.

13

Ears of Corn in Gargara; which was in Mysia, a Province of the Hellespont.

14

The Original is, And the Mother of AEneas resides in the City of her Son. AEneas, from whom the Romans derived their Original, was the Son of Venus by Anchises.

15

The Original, rendered as literally as possible, is as follows: Walk at your ease under the Pompeian Shade, when the Sun enters the Herculean Lion; or where the Mother hath added her Benefactions to those of her Son; a work rich in foreign Marble: Nor avoid that Portico adorned with ancient Pictures, which is called Livia, from the Name of its Founder: nor that adorned by the Statues of the Belides, who attempted the Lives of their unfortunate Cousins; and where you see the cruel Father standing with his drawn Sword: Nor pass by the Temple of Venus and her lamented Adonis; nor omit the Seventh-Day Festivals of the Jews; nor the EgyptianTemples of the Linnen-clad Heifer: She makes many Women to be that which she herself was to Jupiter.

To explain these several Particulars to an English Reader, it must be known, that the Portico's in Rome were the publick Walks; and here Persons of both Sexes used to assemble. Among these was one built by Pompey. The second Portico mentioned, is by the best Commentators understood of the Octavian, which was built by Octavia, Sister to Augustus, and Mother to Marcellus; and this adjoined to a Temple built by the same Marcellus. The third Portico was built by Livia the Wife of Augustus, and called from her Name. The fourth, where the Picture of the Belides was, is to be understood of the Portico of Apollo Palatinus, in which were the Statues of the fifty Daughters of Danaus and Grandaughters of Belus. These being married to the fifty Sons of their Uncle AEgyptus, every one, by her Father's Command, slew her husband on the first Night, save only Hypermnestra. For this they were punished in the lower World, by being obliged to fill a Barrel full of Holes with Water. Scaliger and others have here made a mistake, supposing the Picture of the Belides was here hung up: But the contrary appears by many Authorities, particularly by this in Qv. Trist. 3.

Signa peregrinis ubi sunt alterna columnis, Belides, & stricto barbarus ense pater.

It appears that the Number of Pillars was equalled by the Number of Statues. 5thly, The Temple of Venus, in which she was worshipped, together with Adonis, after the Assyrian manner. This Adonis was the Son of Cinyras King of Cyprus, begotten by him on his own Daughter Myrrha. The Fame of his Beauty, and the Passion which Venus bore towards him, are well known. 6thly, The Jewish Synagogues. The Jews having been encouraged by Julius Caesar, were very numerous in Rome at that time; and the Strangeness and Pomp of their Ceremonies inviting the Curiosity of the Roman Ladies, their Synagogues became famous Places of Intrigue. 7. The Temple of Isis. This Goddess, when a Woman, was called Io. She was the Daughter of Inachus; and being beloved by Jupiter, was by him, to preserve her from his Wife's Jealousy, turned into a Heifer, Juno suspecting the Fact, obtained this Heifer of her Husband, and set Argus to watch over her. Jupiter wanting to visit his old Friend, sent Mercury to kill Argus; in revenge of which, Juno ordered a Gad-Bee to sting the poor Heifer; which thereupon growing mad, ran to Egypt, where she was again restored to the Shape of a Woman, and married to Osiris. The Feast of Isis was celebrated in Rome ten Days together by the Women, and was a time of Carnival among them.

16

In Caesar's Forum, which was built on the Appian Way, was the Temple of Venus Genetrix.

17

Races were run at Rome in April in the Circus Maximus, which was likewise the Scene of many other public Exercises and Shews.

18

And when the Procession shall pass on with the Ivory Deities, do you applaud most the Statue of Lady Venus. Thus the Original. The Paraphrase preserves the same Sense, though in other Circumstances. These Statues were carried in Procession on many Occasions, particularly at the Maegalesian Games.

The Lovers Assistant; Or, New Art of Love

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