Читать книгу The Psalms - Herbert O'Driscoll - Страница 20

Psalm 13

How long, O Lord?

will you forget me for ever?

This is a song that begins in anguish and ends, almost unbelievably, in joy. It is almost impossible to read the opening verses without being reminded of Hamlet’s agonized cry on the battlements of Elsinore: “O, that this too too solid flesh would melt, thaw and resolve itself into a dew!”

“How long, O Lord?” Since the human voice found words to express human feelings, this cry has gone up to the gods. We can withstand so much—so much pain, so much hatred, so much aggression against us—but there comes a time when resistance is ground down and our resources are exhausted. We can feel control slipping.

Our response is even more compromised by a haunting fear that all our troubles transpire in an utterly uncaring universe. Even the person of faith—which the psalmist certainly is—can dread that God has forgotten his or her very existence. The question, “Will you forget me for ever?” is poignant beyond words.

But perhaps, for the person of faith, there is an even greater terror than the fear of being forgotten by God. We can entertain the suspicion that God is playing a merciless cat and mouse game with our life and its pain, that God is hiding, inviting a fruitless search to which God may, or may not, whimsically respond. All this agony rings out in the cry, “How long will you hide your face from me?”

Both the mental and emotional faculties of the psalmist are being stressed to the breaking point. “How long shall I have perplexity in my mind, and grief in my heart?” So often we hear someone cry out that they think their mind is going. “How long shall my enemy triumph over me?” There is a feeling of utter defeat coupled with a desperate plea for help: “Look upon me … give light to my eyes, lest I sleep in death.”

But now we begin to hear, once again, the glory that is everywhere in the psalms—quite literally, the glory of God. Nothing can displace the profound faith of the psalmist: “I [will] put my trust in your mercy.” The first springtime of joy comes in the wintertime of despair: “My heart is joyful … I will sing … I will praise the name of the Lord Most High.”

We are watching as someone snatches true victory from apparent defeat, and we pray that this may be so in our experience also.

Have you suffered despair? Do you know someone who suffers despair? Ask God to embrace those in despair with the divine presence, to give them compassion for themselves and others in despair, and to illuminate them with the light of grace.