Читать книгу Geek Drama - Holly Smale, Холли Смейл - Страница 7

y name is Harriet Manners, and I am an idiot.

I know I’m an idiot because:

1. One half of me is inside a cupboard, and the other is not.

2. I can’t move more than two centimetres either backwards or forwards.

3. My feet aren’t touching the ground.

4. The shelf I used to climb up to this windowsill collapsed at least forty minutes ago.

5. I keep saying, “Help, help, I’m stuck,” even though nobody can hear me.

Clearly my spatial awareness is every bit as terrible as my dance teacher said it was after the Year 10 performance where I accidentally kicked another student in the face during an enthusiastic but badly executed can-can.

I don’t fit through this window.

At all.

Frankly, the fact that I even thought I might is a cause for serious concern. Recent studies have revealed that domesticated chickens have finely honed sensory capacities and an ability to think, draw inferences, apply logic and plan ahead in more advanced ways than those of a young child.

So, as I’ve been wedged firmly into the semi-open window of a cleaning cupboard in Infinity Models for forty minutes now, I can’t help thinking something, somewhere has gone very badly wrong.

It doesn’t say much for your IQ levels when you’re a fifteen-year-old girl with less common sense than poultry.