Читать книгу Love at Last - Irene Brand - Страница 11

Traveling toward Riverview Ridge, Lorene knew that she should find someone else to take this assignment. She pulled to the curb of a tree-shaded street and telephoned her office. After talking with several members of her staff, she conceded that it was impossible for anyone else from the agency to come to Woodston for several weeks. She had two choices—back out on the firm’s commitment to Woodston or stay and handle the promotion herself. Accepting the inevitable, she drove on.

If she had to stay in Woodston for two months, Lorene was pleased that she’d have a comfortable place to live. When she’d checked in at the B and B earlier in the day, she’d been delighted with her choice. The white frame 1850s story-and-a-half cottage had enormous ivy-covered redbrick chimneys. The house was T-shaped, with dormer windows set in the front and rear sections of the main structure’s roof. A small front porch was in Queen Anne style, and a long screened-in back porch extended the full length of the stem part of the building. Green shutters graced the long, narrow windows on the first floor.

The entrance to the two-room apartment was through a private door on the back porch and up narrow, steep steps. According to the proprietor, Dottie Montgomery, this had once been the care-taker’s quarters, but she’d had it renovated into an apartment. The Montgomerys also had three single rooms in the main part of the house for rent. But Lorene needed space to accommodate her computer and other office equipment she’d brought with her.

Dottie Montgomery, a buxom, hospitable blonde in her mid-sixties, met Lorene on the porch with a glass of lemonade in her hand. Pointing to a round table circled by three chairs, the landlady set the lemonade on the table and said, “Sit down and rest a spell. I’ll have my husband carry up your things. Climbing those steps can get tiresome when you’re loaded down with suitcases.”

But Dottie seemed to be talkative, and right now Lorene was in no mood for visiting. What she really wanted to do was to go somewhere, scream at the top of her voice and release the pent-up frustration that had been burgeoning through the deepest recesses of her being since she’d encountered Perry two hours ago. In her present frame of mind, she worried that she couldn’t be polite to Dottie, so she said, “Thank you, but I’ll need to settle in to my apartment and get ready to start working tomorrow.” She took a deep swig of the lemonade. “That really is delicious. Thank you.”

“You gonna eat dinner here? I serve breakfast and dinner.”

“Not tonight. Perry Saunders, cochair of the bicentennial commission, is taking me out for dinner so we can discuss plans for the celebration. And I’ll prepare my own breakfast, too. My working hours will be irregular, so I’ll notify you on a day-to-day basis when I want to eat dinner with you. Will that be satisfactory?”

“Whatever makes our visitors happy suits us,” Dottie said. “My husband, John, and I are here to make your stay comfortable, so let us know if there’s anything we can do to help you. We’re both involved in the bicentennial celebration, so we’ll be seeing you often.”

Taking another swallow of the lemonade, Lorene said, “I’ll bring my luggage into the porch, and you can send it up when it’s convenient.”

Lorene retrieved three suitcases and two garment bags from her late-model station wagon and put them on the porch. She brought in a small file cabinet. Then she carried her laptop and cosmetic case with her as she went upstairs to the homelike apartment.

The combination living room and kitchenette had a fireplace with a beautiful, hand-carved mantel. The interior woodwork of the house was all original. White crocheted doilies dressed up the ancient tables, plump pillows were piled on the couch and a handmade quilt covered the bed. A gable window looked out over a pleasant expanse of field that led down to the Ohio River a quarter of a mile away.

Riverview Ridge was a quaint building, and Lorene had promptly decided that spending some time here would be almost like a vacation. But now that she’d met Perry, she couldn’t even be excited about this apartment, which was casually furnished in antiques that would have sold for a small fortune in Pittsburgh.

Lorene laid her things in the small, low-ceilinged bedroom, kicked off her shoes and lounged on the soft sofa, a concession to modern comfort among the ancient pieces of furniture. She laid an arm over her closed eyes as her tortured mind recalled the past.

She’d met Perry Saunders when they were both college sophomores. They had several classes together and became good friends. Their friendship slowly developed into a beautiful romance. Although they were very much in love, they couldn’t afford to get married, for Lorene’s parents threatened to cut off her tuition money if she married Perry. Both of them were Christians and opposed to sex before marriage, but in a weak moment they succumbed to the intense magnetism building between them and made love once.

Afterward, they agreed it wouldn’t happen again, and both of them welcomed the summer break, thinking it might dull the flame that smoldered in their hearts. As part of his engineering studies, Perry would be on field assignment in Mexico for three months. That time of separation would give them time to put their love in perspective with their goals for the future.

But unforeseen circumstances ruined their plans. Her family moved to another town that summer and after being ill for almost a year, Lorene continued her education at another school. She’d had no news of Perry until she saw him today. It had taken years to numb the pain of losing him, and just seeing him for an hour had flooded her mind with pleasant memories and past disappointments.

After Lorene left his office, Perry lowered his head to his hands. God, thank You for answering my prayers and bringing her back into my life, but now that she’s here, I don’t know what to do with her. Should we take up where we left off? I believe You meant us for each other, but just like Abraham and Sarah in the Bible, we didn’t wait for Your timing. We took matters into our own hands, and that never works out. God, I need Your direction now more than I’ve ever needed it.

He remembered the time he’d given Lorene a promise ring, held her in his arms and whispered, “I love you with all my heart, and I want to marry you as soon as I possibly can. God made us for each other, and I’ll never marry any woman except you.”

His love had deepened and intensified every day they’d been together. When she’d left him and eventually disappeared from his life, Perry was so distressed that at one point he’d contemplated suicide. He had telephoned her home repeatedly but she didn’t return his calls. He wrote letters, which she didn’t answer, and when he went to her home, he learned the family had moved. He finally gave up, believing that she no longer wanted him.

When despair had almost conquered him, when he was at the lowest ebb, he’d experienced God’s call to full-time Christian service. He’d believed that God was giving him a new life to replace the one he’d envisioned with Lorene, by leading him into the field of Christian education.

Perry considered his promise to Lorene as binding as if he’d made it before a minister, so he’d lived a celibate life, denying himself the pleasure of wife and family. It was years before he could attend a wedding without experiencing a pain in his heart that gnawed at his innards until he was physically sick.

Today, when he’d heard Lorene’s voice in the office, he’d known immediately who it was, and when he’d seen her, he’d been as physically aware of her as if they’d separated only yesterday.

Considering the tingle of excitement that had surged through him when she’d delayed her departure from Woodston long enough to have dinner with him, Perry wondered if he’d done the right thing in encouraging her to stay. When she’d abandoned him twenty years ago without any explanation, it was obvious she hadn’t loved him. If she stayed at Woodston until after the big celebration, he’d be seeing her often. Would his love for her surface again? Grimly he determined that wouldn’t happen. He couldn’t risk being rejected a second time.

Lorene stirred when she heard a knock at the door. She padded across the hardwood floor in her stocking feet and opened the door for the landlord to carry in her luggage.

“Hope you’ll be comfortable here, Lorene,” John Montgomery said. “If I can be any help, let me know.”

“This is a beautiful home. Has it been in your family long?”

His laugh was slow and hearty. “No. Dottie and I bought the property several years ago. The place had been vacant for a long time, and it took us three years to fix it up. It’s a good project to bring in a little money and keep us out of devilment in our retirement years.”

“It’s a nice location—should be quiet at night.”

“Sure is.” He tipped the brim of his cap, a gesture that she’d seen several times already in Woodston, perhaps a custom left over from the Old South. “Make yourself at home.”

She closed the door after John’s departure, went into the bedroom and spread out on the canopied bed that would have been at home in Gone with the Wind. At six o’clock Lorene forced herself to get up and check out her wardrobe. Leaving most of her luggage where John had placed it, she opened a garment bag and chose a white button-front, long-sleeved, lined crochet sweater and a long patterned skirt that swirled gracefully around her ankles when she walked. She eased her feet into white sandals and crossed the hall to the bathroom.

Wedged in behind the staircase, the bathroom contained a shower stall and the other necessities. Lorene brushed her hair and repaired her makeup, giving special attention to her eyes, hoping to camouflage the raw hurt and deep longing that hadn’t been there when she’d stood before the mirror earlier in the day. She didn’t believe the makeup did any good, for the eyes staring back at her still had a bleak and wary expression.

From her jewelry box she took the silver ring set with a small garnet that Perry had given her when he’d promised to love her forever. Promise rings had been popular on campus between engaged couples, and Perry had saved for weeks before he’d accumulated enough money to buy the ring.

Lorene slipped the ring on her finger, but quickly took it off and dropped it back in the box. She fastened diamond solitaires in her ears and clamped the jewelry box tight.

Since Perry might not know how to access her apartment, she went to the porch to wait for him. But he must have been familiar with Riverview Ridge, because he drove in and parked beside her station wagon before she had time to sit down. He came toward her, dressed in a red sport shirt and black trousers, looking like the young man she remembered. Until she’d encountered him today, Lorene had never seen Perry in a suit and tie.

“Ready?” he asked.

“Yes. I thought you might not know how to find me, so I came downstairs to wait,” she explained, not wanting him to think she’d been so eager for this dinner date.

“Dottie only has one apartment, so I knew where you were. We don’t have many sleeping accommodations in town, and sometimes I have to recommend a lodging place to college visitors. I’ve made it my business to know what’s available.”

“Then you know what an interesting apartment it is.”

“Interesting, and comfortable, I believe.”

Perry drove a new blue sedan. Remembering the days when he’d used a bicycle for transportation around campus, Lorene was pleased that the years had brought him prosperity.

“What kind of food do you prefer tonight?” he asked as they left Woodston’s city limits. “I’m going across the river to Indiana, where there’s a choice of fine eating places.” His lips curved in an infectious smile. “Always before when we ate out, I couldn’t afford anything except pizza and burgers. I’d like to buy something better for you tonight.”

Was this going to be a night of recalling what they’d once shared? Lorene wondered.

“I still like pizza and burgers,” Lorene assured him, grinning. “But you choose. I enjoy most foods.”

“Then we’ll go to a family restaurant with a wide selection of entrées. Now, tell me about yourself. What have you been up to since we were together? You’re apparently doing all right, since you have your own business.”

“I finished college in New Jersey, and I worked in several PR agencies around the country for a few years. I couldn’t find any town that suited me until I settled in Pittsburgh eight years ago. I went into partnership with an elderly man, and when he retired, I was able to buy the business at a reasonable price.”

“Are your parents well?”

“Yes. They live in Philadelphia, and I don’t see them often. That’s another reason I was disgruntled over having to come to Woodston. Our whole family gets together once a year when we vacation at the same place, and we had reservations in Atlantic City for the next two weeks. I had to cancel.”

“I’m sorry about that. You could have delayed coming to Woodston.”

Lorene shook her head. “That’s business for you. When you’re the boss, you have to be the troubleshooter, too. And it looks like I’ll have to stay in Woodston. I made several phone calls and no one else will be available for a few weeks. I don’t like to be away from the business for such a long period, but I have a reliable office manager.”

Her words both delighted and disturbed Perry. How much togetherness could they experience without being swept headlong into their previous relationship? He struggled with an overwhelming desire to pull her close to him, and he didn’t believe Lorene was insensitive to his presence, either. Her body was tense and her well-formed hands were clenched in her lap. He sensed she was fighting to maintain her composure, but her face was unyielding, as if she had no intention of allowing herself to surrender to the past.

Earlier today, he knew her determination had crumbled in her surprise at seeing him. For a moment she’d been lost in her emotions and her heart had bonded with his as eagerly as it had in their youth. He believed if he’d taken her in his arms then, she wouldn’t have resisted. But she was in control now. With an inward sigh he realized that was just as well. Her willpower would encourage him to stifle yearnings he couldn’t indulge.

“I’m sorry you have to stay when you don’t want to.”

She waved an expressive hand, and her body seemed to relax as they talked of impersonal matters.

“It’s all in a day’s work,” she said, “but I feel as if I’m coming to Woodston in the dark. I picked up that file from Alma as I left your office, but I haven’t looked at it yet. I’ll try to study through it tomorrow.”

The restaurant was located one block from a busy highway. Perry asked for a corner booth, so they were fairly well isolated. Soft music filtered through the room as they ate, muting their conversation from those around them. They spent almost two hours in the restaurant discussing their respective jobs, talking as friends. Lorene didn’t want to open old wounds. Still, she couldn’t help wonder if Perry no longer cared for her.

When they’d finished their dessert, Lorene said, “Since I’ll have to take on the bicentennial project, are we going to admit that we used to know each other?”

Perry lifted his eyebrows in surprise. “Why not? It must have been obvious to Alma that we aren’t strangers.”

Lorene’s fingers traced the pattern of the place mat. Without meeting his gaze, she said, “I need to know what to keep secret and what to say. I don’t want to be an embarrassment to you.”

“Why not say we were college friends and let it go at that?”

“That’s fine with me,” she said with a sinking heart, knowing that she’d long ago forfeited the right to be more than friends. “Seeing you was more than I bargained for when I came to Woodston.”

“Maybe our meeting again is God’s plan for us. Have you considered that?”

“Until I’ve atoned for my past sins, I can’t expect God to be concerned over my welfare.”

Unspoken pain turned Perry’s eyes into inky, unfathomable orbs as he placed his hand over hers. “We don’t have to make restitution for our sins to have God love us. He loved us enough to send Jesus to make atonement for us. God knows our hearts, and He forgave us for making a wrong choice.” He paused, adding reminiscently, with some bitterness, “But it took a long time to forgive myself.”

“Does that mean you’re sorry for—” she hesitated a few seconds “—the months we dated?”

“We might be better off not to discuss what happened years ago, but since you’ve brought it up—you know as well as I do that I enjoyed all of our time together.”

Remembering the outcome of their engagement revived a pain in Lorene’s heart she found hard to bear. Her fingers stirred in his grasp and he released her hand.

“I’ll mention to Mr. Kincaid and Alma that we knew each other in college. We had a lot of good times together, and I don’t see why we can’t be friends. We can’t avoid each other while you’re here.”

Perry’s offer of friendship was rather like offering a starving person a teaspoon of chicken broth. But after she’d deserted him once, without an explanation, she’d relinquished the right to expect anything more.

When they returned to the car, Perry inserted his key in the ignition and started the engine. Memories of the past flashed through his mind, and he sat silently for a couple of minutes before he turned to Lorene.

“I shouldn’t ask this, but I have to know. Why did you just drop me without an explanation? Why didn’t you answer my letters or return my telephone calls?”

A startled gasp escaped her lips and she faced him quickly. She latched on to his second question, and he didn’t seem to notice that she avoided the first one. “What telephone calls? What letters? When did you write to me?”

“I sent a dozen or so letters that summer I was in Mexico. Days would go by when we didn’t have any communication with the outside world, but I mailed you a letter when I could. We went to a town every two or three weeks, and I always telephoned, but I couldn’t contact you. Your parents told me you didn’t want to talk to me, but I kept calling, hoping you’d answer the phone.”

Anger burned so fiercely in Lorene’s heart that her voice sounded harsh and raspy. “I had no idea you’d tried to get in touch with me. That’s why I allowed my father to convince me that you were glad to get rid of me.”

“I should have known,” Perry muttered. Her words cut like a flesh wound. “Your father never did approve of our relationship, but I can’t understand why you wouldn’t have expected me to write and why you didn’t contact me.”

“Our mail was delivered to a post-office box, and Dad always picked it up, so it was easy for them to intercept my messages. Perry, I’m so sorry. Leaving you was the worst mistake I’ve ever made, but I didn’t have your address in Mexico, and I didn’t want to take a chance on your parents mistakenly opening my mail. When I didn’t hear from you, I thought what we’d done had turned you against me—that you didn’t love me any longer.”

“I gave you no reason to think that,” he said sharply.

She steeled herself against the deep emotion in his voice. “I just can’t believe my parents treated me that way.”

“You don’t believe me?”

“Of course I believe you. But they’d have saved me a lot of heartache if they’d stayed out of our private affairs.”

“I finished the job training in time to start my senior year at college. I came to your home, intending to force my way in to see you, only to learn your family had moved. If your neighbors knew where you’d gone, they wouldn’t tell me.”

Lorene unconsciously twisted her slender hands together and leaned her head against the window. She held back tears of rage and disappointment. She remembered vividly the despair of the months following her separation from Perry. Though her parents told her persistently that he’d deceived her, only pretending to love her until he’d violated her purity, Lorene continued to believe they were wrong. She pored over each day’s mail, looking for a letter. Finally the day came when she no longer wanted to see Perry and lived in dread that he would come back to her. But she’d never forgotten how much she loved him, and her parents had never completely convinced Lorene that he hadn’t loved her.

He tenderly caressed her cheek with a knuckle and stroked the long hair on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry I’ve distressed you. It’s my fault. I should have known you wouldn’t walk out on me. It’s all right. Don’t let it ruin your evening.”