Читать книгу Dog Soldiers: Part 2 of 3: Love, loyalty and sacrifice on the front line - Isabel George, Isabel George - Страница 5

I could always tell when Kenneth was unhappy because his letters gave him away. If he was happy he would be all chatty and newsy and asking for all kinds of treats things to help him and Diesel be more comfortable. When he was unhappy I would read the letter and picture him sitting in the dirt, knees raised, writing paper resting on his legs. I could feel his words. I know he enjoyed a good whinge and moan, but then who doesn’t? The thing is Kenneth’s moans didn’t last long. Once he had let them out, they were gone.

I remember one of the letters he wrote to me in April, about a month after he arrived in Afghanistan. It was a great letter because he had written it in diary style. It took me, it took us all, to a dirt hole in Afghan. I was with Kenneth and 3 Para in the desert. He took me through two days from the early morning into the night, so I knew when he was sleeping, washing, feeding Diesel, watching DVDs, waiting for things to happen and thinking of home. For the first time I saw a side of my son that really didn’t get a chance to materialise day-to-day at home, in Newcastle.

For someone who I don’t think ever bought a pen, Kenneth suddenly thought it was worth mentioning the bargain price of the pens and paper he was using. Very funny, as he was always taking my pens and paper and never thinking about the cost! And asking me to pass on the letters he sent to other members of the family, asking me because ‘it’s good manners’, because as Kenneth would say: ‘I was brought up, not dragged up!’ It was nice to know that some things I had said stayed with him, even in the desert thousands of miles away.

Saturday 19 April

07.50hrs: Breakfast was a boil-in-the-bag sausage omelette and beans with another really shite cup of tea …

08.05hrs: The temperature’s really starting to pick up now so will write more later … By the way, I’m starting to like drinking water now without the cordial. Honest! Mam, tell Dad we might have to get a fridge in the garage with one of those water dispenser thingies for when I get home. Now that’s what I call proper English, like!

10.20hrs: Hi, back again. Just been mortared. Two mortars missed the location by 100–150 metres. The Taliban really should practise more, plus the bastards woke me up! It’s really hot now … even in the shade. That’s all for now folks! xxx

I’m back again … We have to stand-to every night and morning at 05.05 and 19.10 just in case the Taliban decides to attack – 200 squaddies with 40 vehicles, 10 .50-calibre machine guns, 10 grenade launchers, let alone about 10,000 rounds of 5.6s, but, hey, that’s the Army for you!

It’s long days here but some are longer due to not moving around a lot. Can you and Dad remember a picture I sent Dad on his mobile of my lil room on exercise? Well, this is worse than that. Ha! Ha!

Dug in about two feet with three rows of sandbags stacked up. Desert basher on top to give me and Diesel some protection from the sun. Got my roll mat that’s broken and won’t inflate and my sleeping bag then my Bergen to one side with my rifle and body armour positioned for easy access. This is my home.

Sunday 20 April

06.00hrs: Good morning Afghanistan! I’ve been asleep for four hours, just went to the toilet, picked up my daily rations and to my amazement at 06.35 some guy came round to my little house on the prairie and handed me two parcels … I think they have been sitting here a while. That’s what happens with all the moving around. I will make sure you have the right addresses as far as I can. Love ya! xx

07.30hrs: That’s scoff eaten, baby-wipe wash done, teeth brushed, parcels opened, letters read and all packed away in my Bergen … waiting out on either another attack or orders to go and do some real work … meanwhile I’ve got a small fascination with reading. I’m onto The Golden Compass a second time and it doesn’t ring true with the film, which is such a pity …

Tell Steph to hurry up moving out so I can have my old room back. Ha! Ha! Only kidding really … Talking The Golden Compass again. It’s the only book I’ve got with me. I left Jeremy Clarkson’s at Bastion.

08.12hrs: Me again. Hey, who else would it be really? I was just going to read chapter eleven of The Golden Compass, after cleaning my rifle, and wondered what kind of daemon I would have. Then I thought, well, I have Diesel with me so perhaps he would hold my soul and be my daemon? I wonder if other people would think a dog would be the right daemon for me.

10.10hrs: I’m fed up of the desert now. And I’m really pissed off. The 3 Para lads asked me if there was anything I needed as they had to do a run to pick up rations, water and ammo. All I asked them for was dog food. So what did they forget? Yes, the f’ing dog food!! I’ve only got enough now to last me until tomorrow. It’s f’ing shite and it really pisses me off. I have enough in my kit to sustain him for another two days but it ain’t the right thing to do or the best thing for him to be honest. Can’t believe it’s so hard to do something so simple. It’s the British Army for f’s sake!

12.30hrs: Sand storm now and has been for twenty minutes. Kicks in dust from everywhere and covers everything. Diesel’s water bowl is already full of wet dust. Quite fitting that I’m having such a problem with dust as I’m reading The Golden Compass! I wonder who has the most problems with dust – me or Lord Asriel? Ha! Ha!

I’m hiding in my doss bag with a head torch writing this and waiting the storm out. D is curled up in the corner with my second basher draped over him to keep as much off him as possible. Hopefully it won’t last much longer. xxx

15.30hrs: Well I fell asleep in the storm and woke about an hour ago. It went really hot but it has clouded over again now so bet it will rain next. Very gloomy. Still no work and told not moving anywhere until the 24th (April) hopefully getting a hele back to KAF.

Christ this sandstorm keeps coming and going and it’s just been pissing down. And we’ve had some thunder and lightning which would probably have been pretty dramatic without the sandstorm at the same time! I’ve blocked my basher up to try and prevent as much wind and rain coming in as possible – like that’s going to happen!

17.30hrs: Just had my evening meal of chicken tikka, rice and a cup of crap tea. Got a Yorkie bar – it has to be sweets for pudding! That’s what I miss most about Army life to civvie is being able to eat almost anything you want to eat without having your food dictated to you day in and day out. But I was just thinking how much I could down a good family Chinese or egg and chips with fresh bread … things like that.

Sorry my writing’s gone all funny due to the sand clogging the end of my pen and Diesel trying to get between me and the wall and still trying to fit on my inflatable roll mat – which no longer inflates.

19.00hrs: OK, best go and stand-to as the Taliban are literally that brave that they will attack us head-on in a fire-fight!

21.00hrs: Hey just realised I’m on page 10 of this letter … Now tell me I ain’t just bored the tits off you?

What I would do for a cheese scone right now is not worth thinking about!

Six days to the planned push … I hope it happens …

When I read the letters back now I can see that Kenneth did a lot of growing up in Afghanistan. There’s a seriousness on the page and over the four months it’s there more and more. He mentions his favourite book, The Golden Compass, many times but I suppose there’s a lot of down time in the desert so reading about a fantasy world where good is pitted against evil … it was bound to make Kenneth think about the story in a way he probably never had at home. Whenever I read the letters over now I can see why the book provided some escapism from what was happening all around him. After all, who wouldn’t have wished themselves somewhere beyond the sand-blasted hell of Helmand?

To me that letter was a window into Kenneth’s life in Afghan and, reading between the lines, I think it says ‘I miss you lot.’ Even now I read parts of it and cry: the yearning for egg and chips, the concern for Trevor his pet tortoise, praising me for sticking with my swimming lessons and conquering my fear in the water. I loved him congratulating his dad for facing his fear of technology to write his first e-bluey! It was so Kenneth … in a letter … a moment in time. Him all over.

Knowing what I know now I read his last few letters in a different way to how I did in 2008.

I don’t just read them, I search through them. I want to learn more and more about my son’s life in the place where he died.

24 June

The air-con unit in my room has broken down and it’s like a sauna. I could lose so much weight here … and more fucking vehicle searches today. We’ve searched 20+ vehicles entering the Camp … so I’ll be glad I’ll be getting out of here on the 27th June. I’m doing a new job in a FOB not that far away in Helmand Province. Don’t worry, though, I’ve been training for this. It’s a great opportunity really. There is some bad news, though; I’ve been told that I can’t get my promotion as I’m not eligible until October or maybe January. That also pisses me off!

There might be a posting to Brunei coming up … but I’ve been asked to go to Germany in November. It’s a three-year posting, if Poole or Hereford doesn’t work out. Which one do you think I should do take?

Well that’s my little rant over! I’ll write and ring you tonight if Op Minimise isn’t on that is. Love ya as always Ken xxx

3 July

Just a quick one – how is everything? Have you seen much of the baby? We talk and email and seem to be OK … Keep me in touch with how everything is.

Well, that’s all I got to say. Will write when I’m established with my new lot. Take care. Love you loads as always. Ken xxx

By the way parents, how are you coping with the tour? I was told to ask. In daily brief they told us to check on our families as they can go through more stress and anxiety than we do. So are you OK with everything? Is there anything we need to discuss? Don’t be afraid to ask what you think could be a delicate question. Just ask me.

Oh Mam, I need some decent toothpaste and another exfoliating mitt. I bought some toothpaste in the NAAFI [Navy, Army and Air Force Institutes – military camp shops] which was supposed to be Colgate but it tasted like shit. I swear the dust gets into the toothpaste too. By the way the mitts are really cheap in Morrisons. Mam, I don’t know if I’ve ever said but I really like writing the letters to you and the rest of the family. It really relaxes me and I wish I had more time during the day for that. How’s my handwriting – be honest? I hope my spelling’s not too shite?

How’s the baby? I’ve seen photos of her on MSN, her mum sent them, and we were talking but I couldn’t see much of the bairn. Is she beautiful, Mam? Bet she is. Hope she’s got our skin and my jet-black hair. Oh Mam, I can’t wait to get home …

Love you as always. Ken xxx Rabb says hi too!

9 July

My R and R is cancelled so at the moment I ain’t comin’ home. Shite. My captain is on the case so I should get my leave as planned but I wanted you to know the score. I’m raging at the moment but what can I do about it? The decisions are made by people higher up than me.

Sorry about the camera. I was taking cover and didn’t think about the camera. I hope it can be mended after all the trouble you went to find one for me and get it out here. It was a bloody lovely one too.

I’ve asked them to send Sasha out to me which means I’ll be back on search dog work all the time. Andy Dodds has been working her in Garmsir and she was working well finding everything the Taliban put down or try to hide in the tunnels there. Andy’s taking on a new role and he won’t need her for a while so I feel comfortable about that. I’ll be much happier when Sasha gets here. She’s a bloody good dog … I’ll be alright with her. And she’s a light creamy coloured Lab, not golden like Diesel, so she will do better with the heat too.

Would love to have seen Jeni bath the dog! Mine and Jeni’s relationship has shifted since I’ve been over here and I feel closer to her, more than I ever have before. I think my coming here has made the difference but I’m not sure if my siblings see that, but I know it’s true! I like it.

On the R and R – just thought, I’m owed two weeks so I’m going to ask if they can be added to my Christmas leave which means I’ll get six weeks at home. Can’t wait!

Mam, have you seen much of the baby and her mum? Let me know how that’s going will you? After this lot’s over I’ve got some career decisions to make and it’s on my mind.

One decision I have made in this life is I’m going to stop doing things for people who let me down. Well that’s my gripe out of the way! Remember I love you all. Ken xxx

12 July

Hey hello there and how are we on this ridiculously hot day in Helmand Province, Afghanistan? Only eight days until the hottest day of the year but here we are bloody boiling in the day and blasted by sandstorms at night. It’s like thick blankets of sand just hitting you in the face. We’re covered in it all the time – the guys and the dogs.

Mam do you think you could send some cordial to put in the water? It’s bloody disgusting. I thought I was getting used to it but I was wrong. It’s shit but not as shit as the tea. Could you send some proper teabags please? Aw that’d be just great. A proper cuppa. I dream about it.

Hey, I’ve got Sasha now and she’s bloody marvellous. I knew she would be. Captain Thompson brought her out to me at Inkerman and we got on right away. She’s already made friends with the guys of 2 Para. She’s got a bit of a reputation for being good at her job – just like me eh???? So we’re having some successes out here and impressing the boss no end!

She has to be the best dog out here. Got to be.

There’s a big push planned. Me and Sasha are waiting to hear what happens next but we’re used to that. Meanwhile we’re helping with the planning for the job and hopefully we will get a lot of success on this one.

The internet has been down for a few days so sorry I’ve not been sending any e-blueys. It’s not that easy here. One internet terminal and two text link terminals between 200 people doesn’t really add up. It’s different at Bastion where you can book time. It’s not like that here. There’s no booking time and with so many people waiting it’s a check your emails, reply to them and then get off so someone else can have their turn. We all need that connection with home Mam. It means so much out here. It’s a good for morale thing.

Did you manage to tape Top Gear for me? Please say you did? It’s the only programme I try to watch religiously so I’m gutted I’m not in Bastion to watch it. I’ll be catching up on all of them when I get home. Dad, what’s happening with the Grand Prix? Who’s going to come out on top?

Sorry Dad, no juicy news to tell you. I’ve been sitting in a FOB sweating my arse off. It literally is unbearable. My next holiday is going to be in Greenland in December I think. Sorry but I’m praying for rain when I’m home. So 40 days or something till my ‘original’ R and R dates. I’ll find out if that has changed when I get to Bastion. I return there on the 20th or 21st.

Any news on how the baby is doing?

All my love, as always. Ken xxx

23 July

This bluey is just in case my text link isn’t working as I sent you an email today (18th July) at around about 13.00hrs with regards to my bank card and my R and R. I need you to ask Barclays to send me my pin number. I know they won’t give it to you but they can’t send it to me by post here either. I can’t ring them from here as I don’t have enough minutes to go on hold. So when I get to Brize I won’t have any money at all, not even for a phone call.

On my R and R date: if I get R and R at all it will be from the 20th to the 3rd, meaning I arrive at Brize on the 20th. My unit will pick me up and take me to Luffenham where I can pick up my number 2s but then I will need a lift home. I know it’s a long trek that’s why Dad might be the best to come. I’ve thought of asking Uncle Martin but trying to get in touch with that guy is harder than killing all the Taliban! I will pay petrol if needed and food etc on the journey. Dad’s car would certainly be better due to diesel consumption. This needs to be resolved quickly as my R and R is fast approaching. I will let you know confirmed dates ASAP along with the timings. Let me know ASAP what’s going on please. I don’t want to be stuck anywhere.

Cheers Mam. Love you loads as always. Ken xxx

That was his last letter home.

I read it from time to time to remind me that he always intended to come home. Even if everything around him was out of his control and seemed ever so crazy, the one thing he was sure about was that he wanted to come home.

SIXTH SENSE

Out in Helmand on the morning of 24 July Ken Rowe had said to one of his colleagues, ‘I’ve got a funny feeling about today. Something’s going to happen.’ But that wasn’t an unusual experience for Ken. Like his mother, he had a sixth sense and often shared how he felt with his unit. One of his COs felt it was worth having a word with him about it.

‘Ken, you need to stop saying things like that. The “we’re all doomed” approach isn’t a good attitude to have out here and it unnerves others, too. And you do know that if you keep saying it, chances are that one day you could be right.’

That day, Ken Rowe was right.

‘I think up until 5.12pm on 24 July 2008 I had not grasped the full concept of what we and what I was doing in Afghanistan,’ remarked Frank Holmes. ‘Until that point it had been other people getting killed or injured. The flag was lowered for someone else’s son, daughter, soldier, but when I was told that Ken Rowe had died that day my attitude changed completely.

‘I asked myself, had we treated the build-up to this Operation, to this point, as a bit of a game? Just an adrenaline rush? I was gutted when Lance Corporal Craig Ide was involved in a mine strike on a patrol early in the tour. I was involved in one the very next day. Somehow many of us never thought anything would happen to us or those around us.

‘Northern Ireland as I had known it back in 1992–4 was the place to be. We were training for a purpose – to defeat terrorism – and the pace of soldiering was fast and furious. But before the close-down in 2007 it was a shadow of its former self. It was down to the few like Ken Rowe who showed that keen desire to progress his dog, himself and his career in what was still a war on terror.

‘Ken was one of our finest. And we lost him. Our standards needed to be raised and tailored to meet the new level of attack that we had to expect to meet. I tested and trained our handlers accordingly, including Liam Tasker.’

At the time when the RAVC lost Lance Corporal Ken Rowe, 2 Para were experiencing almost daily losses. They also lost a man in the same ambush. Herrick 8 was proving to be the regiment’s toughest yet. The terror threat that faced them seemed to know no bounds. In a culture where life is cheap, where terrorists entice children to strap explosives to their bodies and die for their faith, the rule book is out of the window.

As the Taliban called the tune the pressure fell on the RAVC to turn the intelligence gained on the front line into dogs and handlers ready to locate the latest enemy devices. Liam Tasker was one of the trainers given the task of bringing good dogs forward and now he had the chance to go forward himself with Operation Herrick 13.