Читать книгу One Thing Leads to Another - Jamie Holland - Страница 13

Geordie had begun to think his boss had almost forgotten he existed when Burt uncharacteristically gave him the challenge of coming up with a new marketing package. He was to work on it with Mike, another sales manager who’d joined FDU just before him. The two had always got on well and Mike had even played in Geordie’s rugby team on a couple of occasions. He was really the only person at FDU that Geordie saw for the odd beer outside work; Mike was bored too and was one person Geordie could whinge to about Burt and work who truly appreciated his grievances.

‘It’s time you two got your brains into gear,’ their Taiwanese boss told them with typical frankness. ‘You’ve both been cruising along for too long on your soft arses, so you better make it good.’

This had come as something of a shock to Geordie, who had become unaccustomed to applying his brain much at work. After all, he’d hardly had much need: he could sell monitors in his sleep. What was more, Burt had only given them a couple of days to get their plans together. All the same, he and Mike had worked hard and Geordie felt pretty pleased with their efforts. Furthermore, he’d quite enjoyed the whole exercise. His excitement about Molly had, he felt, if anything, given him a sharper edge that week.

Their plan was to link up with a graphics card company. This was something that was put into a PC to improve all the computer graphics and presentation. Geordie’s premise was that if an individual wanted improved graphics it stood to reason that he would want a decent monitor too on which to use his improved presentation. Therefore he proposed to strike a deal with a graphics card company whereby FDU placed a voucher worth a small discount off any FDU monitor. This would give the graphics card company a competitive edge over other graphic card companies. He and Mike had worked out the finer points of how to implement this dazzling piece of marketing initiative and enthusiastically presented their plans to Burt.

‘I am thinking this,’ he said to them deliberately, ‘it is like a flower in a piece of shit: you made it look very pretty and attractive, but underneath it, it is full of crap.’

‘OK, fine,’ said Mike, after a short pause, ‘how about this: we create a link-save with a graphics card company whereby a buyer gets twenty-five per cent off both products when he or she buys them together.’

‘Different flower, same piece of shit,’ Burt said flatly. ‘A whole lot of trouble for very small feedback. You come up with an idea that is simple to set up and makes us big money on big order, and then I might be interested. This idea of yours will never make us much money as we are only talking about individual sales. But keep trying. I want you two to keep thinking of a plan.’

‘Well that was a bit of a waste of time,’ Geordie grumbled to Mike after they left Burt’s office.

‘Yeah, it was a bit demoralizing,’ Mike added, ‘but he’s right, you know.’

It was a comment Geordie had not expected from Mike, but it came like a sharp slap round the face. Mike was right: Burt was right. Geordie thought quickly. ‘I can see that now,’ he said after a pause. ‘Well, we’ll just have to come up with something really good instead and dazzle him with our sensational business acumen.’ They chuckled, but Geordie realized he’d meant it; thinking up cunning marketing strategies was certainly more fun than not really having to think at all. And although he had little time for Burt as a man-manager, he greatly respected what he’d achieved. Burt was an entrepreneur, and had set up FDU from nothing, zipping between Taiwan and the UK. Although it was still a comparatively small company with only two dozen full-time employees in the Borehamwood office, it had a high annual turnover and Geordie reckoned Burt must be taking home at least a six-figure salary. What Burt had told him in so swiftly stamping on his idea was that it was no good wasting valuable time on small fry. You had to make the maximum use of time and expenditure and think big. If Geordie was ever going to make it alone, these were the sort of tenets he was going to need to follow.

Driving back home that night, Geordie realized he’d let complacency set in. He was a good salesman, but had been doing the job with his eyes shut. It was an attitude that would hinder his entrepreneurial dreams. He hadn’t been challenging himself and it was no wonder he was bored. Bored and becoming boring. Hardly surprising he couldn’t find a girlfriend. But now Burt had laid down the gauntlet: the challenge was there for the taking. He hadn’t understood until it was spelt out for him that what Burt wanted was people with initiative and drive, two things that had been painfully lacking from his life in recent months. His boss had been ignoring him because he hadn’t earned any attention. Successfully selling monitors was not enough.

It also became clear to him that the same principles applied to his quest for Molly’s heart and that his time of reckoning was painfully close. It was Friday evening, the weekend had arrived once more. Geordie felt convinced that the next twenty-four hours had the potential to be one of the most important days in his life. He knew quite a few people would be going to the pub that evening, but was determined not to waste away an evening with idle debauchery. Jessica was going for dinner with Lucie, but he had persuaded Flin to stay in with him, reminding him that going out would only mean spending money he did not have.

‘Well played,’ Flin told him when he saw the pie, ice-cream and cans of beer Geordie had brought back with him. ‘I’ll go out and buy some more cigarettes while you fix up the fodder.’

‘Look, I feel a bit guilty staying in on a summer’s evening, don’t you?’ Geordie confessed.

‘A couple of quick ones in the Rutland might not be a bad idea,’ suggested Flin.

‘Not a bad idea at all,’ agreed Geordie quickly, ‘although I’d sort of meant to stay in and prepare myself psychologically.’

‘Don’t be so pathetic. Honestly, Geordie, we’ll only have a couple of pints and anyway, it’ll relax you.’

‘Oh, all right,’ agreed Geordie. He’d always found it hard to say no to the lure of the pub.

‘So tomorrow’s the big date,’ said Flin, as Geordie put two pints onto the wall outside the pub.

‘Feeling a bit nervous about it, to tell the truth,’ Geordie confessed. ‘Honestly, old man, I took to her that night like I’ve never taken to anyone before.’

‘You’re making me very jealous. You’re about to embark on the love of your life, while I’ve just finished with mine. One of life’s strange little ironies, I suppose.’

‘Look, I’ve only met her once. She might find me totally repellent by the end of tomorrow. And anyway, Poppy wasn’t the love of your life, so don’t be so melodramatic. Furthermore it would never have lasted.’

‘How do you know?’

‘It just wouldn’t.’

‘So are you suggesting that if a relationship isn’t going to last it’s not really worth getting excited about?’

‘Suppose I am. I mean, what’s the point at our age? I, for one, do not want to be spending my entire life going out with people for a month or two and then moving on to someone else. I think the idea of long-lasting companionship is quite appealing. It’s different when you’re younger anyway – you’re surrounded by an enormous choice of women all after pretty much the same thing, so it’s a hell of a lot easier to chop and change. Nowadays, it’s a damn sight harder to meet new people, and, more specifically, new and single people. I don’t want to have to embark, again and again on an increasingly difficult quest for girlfriends. Anyway, I thought we agreed this in our pact.’

‘I didn’t realize a proper girlfriend meant girlfriend for life. You’re only saying all this because you’re so loved up. We don’t all have to follow Eddie Fussle’s example, you know.’

‘I never mentioned marriage, Flin. You say I’m loved up, but you’re just bitter.’

Talking of which, Geordie and Flin managed four apiece before they finally made it back to the house. They still hadn’t eaten and so were beginning to feel quite drunk. Geordie’s choice of stodge helped soak up the alcohol, but they also drank the tins of beer bought earlier. At the end of the video they felt pissed enough to put on Flin’s copy of Withnail and I for yet another viewing and sat sipping glasses of whisky, anticipating out loud their favourite lines.