Читать книгу Love Islands…The Collection - Ким Лоренс, Jane Porter - Страница 31

IT WAS THE light falling across her face and a feeling of not quite knowing where she was that woke Addie. Somebody had closed the cream-coloured blinds, but she knew without even pulling them open that it was morning.

Her stomach flipped over nervously and she kept her eyes closed, basking in the soft whiteness of the morning, delaying the moment when she would have to face the man lying on the other side of the bed. What exactly was the correct way to greet your estranged husband the morning after the night before?

Her cheeks grew warm. Except there hadn’t been a night before, because she’d fallen asleep instead.

She held her breath, wondering how he felt about that fact.

But there was only one way to find out and, gritting her teeth, she opened her eyes and rolled over.

Beside her the bed was empty. And not just empty. The sheet and pillowcase were perfectly smooth. Unless Malachi had slept several inches above the mattress, he hadn’t slept there at all.

Her heart gave a twitch as she noticed a paper rose on the pillow beside her. Unfolding it, she saw that it was a note from Malachi, written in his familiar bold, cursive script.

Sweetheart,

I’m sorry I didn’t wake you last night, only I thought you needed to sleep. I’ve got a couple of problems at work to sort out, but breakfast is all laid out so help yourself to what you want.

Terry is dropping round this morning, so if you need anything else ask him.

Malachi

PS—While I remember, the security pin is 2106. You’ll need it to open any doors or windows. You shouldn’t have a problem remembering it!

She read it again, and then twice more. Reading between every line, letter and punctuation mark. But the words stayed stubbornly the same, and finally she dropped the note onto the sheet beside her.

Of course she would remember the pin number. It was their wedding anniversary. Her mouth thinned. No doubt he’d chosen it to rub in the fact that this trip was a travesty of the honeymoon they might have had, had she not walked out on him. So much for the caring, sharing Malachi of last night.

Frowning, and suddenly feeling as restless as her thoughts, she pushed the sheet off. Rolling out of bed, she padded across the floor into the wet room.

As she stood under the warm spray of water, snippets of yesterday’s lunchtime conversation with Malachi kept popping into her head, each one seeming to contradict the one before. It was so confusing. She couldn’t seem to get a clear picture of what he’d said. It was almost as though she’d been talking to several different versions of the same man. But who was the real Malachi King? And how could she have been married to a man she knew so little about?

Then again, what did any of that matter now? He wasn’t her concern any more.

Wrapped in a large fluffy towel, she walked back into the bedroom and gazed out of the window. It was another glorious day and it really was the perfect honeymoon location.

She lifted her chin. In another life, with another man, it might be, she told herself defiantly. But this was just a business trip. However, it was also probably going to be the only holiday she would ever spend on a private Caribbean island. So from now on she was going to make the most of every moment.

Selecting a new plum-coloured bikini, she covered it with a short crocheted dress—another recent purchase—and, pushing her feet into a pair of brightly coloured beaded sandals, did a twirl in front of the mirror. Glancing at her reflection, she gave a small, satisfied smile before turning and heading downstairs.

There was no sign of Malachi in the kitchen, but breakfast was indeed laid out on the wood-topped counter and, stomach rumbling, she picked out an almond croissant just as there was a knock at the front door.

Her first stupid thought was that it was Malachi. But why would he knock at his own door? And then, remembering his note, she realised it must be Terry. Feeling suddenly shy, she walked hesitantly into the hallway and pulled down on the handle.

Nothing happened.

‘Sorry, Miss Farrell...’ Terry’s voice floated through the door. ‘You need the code.’

‘Oh, yes, of course. I forgot,’ she said, hastily punching her wedding date into the keypad and mentally cursing Malachi for his malicious choice of number.

Her irritation was forgotten, though, as she saw Terry’s broad smiling face beaming down at her.

‘Good morning, Miss Farrell! And how are you today?’

Taking his hand, she smiled back at him. ‘I’m fine, Terry. Thank you.’

‘I saw Mr King this morning and he told me to drop in and make sure you have everything you need.’

‘I do—but while I remember, would you please thank Leonda for the wonderful food?’

Terry grinned. ‘I will, Miss Farrell. She’s real happy, having you and Mr King stay for all this time. Normally he’s only here long enough to read the morning paper—which reminds me: Mr King asked me to drop off today’s newspapers.’ Reaching down, he picked up a bag. ‘There’s some magazines in there too. Let me put them inside for you, Miss Farrell.’

Inside the kitchen, he glanced out of the window and up at the sky.

‘Weather’s looking fine. We might even get some turtles next week.’

‘There are turtles?’ Addie said excitedly. ‘Do they come into the lagoon?’

He shook his head again and laughed. ‘No. Turtles like to nest near open water, so their babies can reach the ocean real quick.’ As though sensing her disappointment, he smiled. ‘But they do nest on Finlay’s Island. You won’t have seen it from the boat, but it’s only thirty minutes away. I keep an eye out at this time of year, so I’ll let you know if I see any sign of them. Now, is there anything else I can do?’

Addie nodded. An idea had just occurred to her. ‘Actually,’ she began tentatively, ‘there is one thing...’

Ten minutes later, Addie was relaxing on a sun lounger, a glass of iced tea in her hand, thoroughly enjoying a celebrity gossip magazine. Having arranged for Terry to take them on a tour of the island, she felt calmer—more in control.

More like herself.

She took a sip of her tea. It wasn’t that she didn’t have a sexy side, but she wasn’t comfortable about it being her defining quality. And now it wouldn’t be.

A shadow fell across her face and her thought jammed inside her head as, looking up sharply, her eyes collided with Malachi’s cool, assessing grey gaze.

‘Good morning,’ he said slowly, his eyes roaming over her in a way that made her whole body twitch restlessly.

Dressed in a pair of linen trousers and a navy polo shirt that clung to the muscular outline of his chest and arms, he looked relaxed and cool despite the heat of the morning.

‘Morning!’ Putting her glass down on the table beside her, she gave him what she hoped was a casual smile. ‘I hope you don’t mind, but I did have some breakfast.’

‘Not at all.’ He glanced back into the villa. ‘I might just grab some fruit. Can I tempt you with anything else?’

‘Like what?’ Her eyes flicked up and he smiled at her mockingly.

‘I meant some more iced tea, or something else to eat.’

Licking her lips, wondering how he managed to make such a mundane suggestion sound so enticing and decadent, she shook her head. ‘No, thank you. I had a...thing...you know...’ Her mind was suddenly a total blank, his proximity playing havoc with her brain. ‘A pastry—almond—almond croissant,’ she managed finally.

‘Then I’ll be right back!’ he said softly, his clear, teasing gaze leaving her in no doubt that he knew the effect he was having on her.

Gritting her teeth, heart pounding, she watched his broad retreating back with a mixture of longing and relief. Moments later her breath seemed to punch out of her lungs as he dropped down lightly beside her on the lounger, the warm length of his thigh pressing against her naked leg.

‘Why does everything taste so much better here than it does back on the mainland?’ he murmured as he licked juice from his fingers. ‘I know sugar’s bad for you, but sometimes there’s nothing better than that rush.’ His eyes slid slowly over her face, fixing on her mouth. ‘Almost nothing anyway.’

Addie felt her stomach drop, and then a slow, prickling tension crept up her spine as he lowered his lips to hers and kissed her softly. Helplessly she arched against his body, feeling a quivering, featherlight pleasure steal over her skin, and then she breathed in sharply as Malachi lifted his head.

‘Now, that is the correct way to say good morning!’

Staring down into Addie’s dazed blue eyes, Malachi forced himself to blank off his mind to the clamouring of his body. His pulse was racing, and a fierce hot pressure was building in his groin. He had planned simply to kiss her, thereby reminding her of why she was sitting there, on his lounger, by his lagoon, looking so damn tempting. But now, with that red hair tumbling across her shoulders, her lips parted invitingly, it took every ounce of willpower he had not to scoop her up into his arms and take her right there and then.

Looking past her, he gritted his teeth, hating how stirred up she made him feel. He wanted her badly—so badly it felt like a toothache. But taking her now would only demonstrate that fact, and he’d arranged a little surprise for her that would be far more effective at enticing her into his arms.

He breathed out. Yesterday, after she had gone upstairs to lie down, he had fully intended to follow her. To give in finally to the hunger that had been growing inside him since the moment he’d heard her voice again.

Only he hadn’t.

Oh, he’d wanted to. But he couldn’t. His legs simply wouldn’t move; it had been as if he was trapped inside his own body as once upon a time he’d been trapped as a unwilling onlooker at his parents’ parties. How could he possibly have gone upstairs to Addie with that thought uppermost in his mind?

As for mentioning his parents to Addie—what had he been thinking? He shifted uncomfortably on the lounger. He’d worked so hard to suppress the hurt, to bury the memories. Now wasn’t the time to let that darkness seep back into his life.

‘Are you okay?’ Looking up, he found Addie watching him warily.

He smiled, instantly back in control, and ran his fingers slowly down her arm, feeling her skin shiver beneath his touch. ‘Of course. And you? Did you sleep okay?’

Her face stiffened. ‘Yes. I did.’ She hesitated. ‘I’m sorry about falling asleep. I suppose I was more tired than I thought.’ She frowned, not wanting to ask where he’d slept. Instead she said quickly. ‘How did you sleep? Did you have a good night?’

It was not a night he would care to repeat, he thought grimly. And sleep had played a very small part in it. Having finally managed to clear his head enough to go and look for her, his erotic imaginings had turned increasingly feverish with every step, so that by the time he’d walked into the bedroom his body had been pulsing with desire.

Only of course she’d been fast asleep, her curled-up body seeming to emphasise her vulnerability and innocence. And, gazing down at her, he had cursed his timing. Waking a sleeping woman simply to gratify his sexual appetites was not something he could ever contemplate. But nor was lying next to that body when his mind was little more than a white-hot mass of sexually charged fantasies.

Which had left him tossing and twisting alone in a bed in one of the many spare rooms in the villa.

So, no. In answer to her question, he hadn’t had a good night.

Or a particularly satisfying morning either. Having woken early and still painfully aroused, he had taken a long, cold shower, standing beneath the icy water until he simply couldn’t feel his body any more. Stepping out of the shower, his libido once again checked and contained, he should have felt calmer.

His mouth thinned. Except that he hadn’t. Instead he’d felt tense and on edge, his mind twitching with a whole set of new and unsettling feelings. Not least the realisation that Addie’s presence appeared to be having an impact on more than just his libido. Staring down at where she lay in his bed, he’d felt more than thwarted lust. Maybe it had been the dark smudges beneath her eyes, or her slightly bitten fingernails, but something had twisted inside him and he’d felt a wholly uncharacteristic impulse to draw her into his arms.

He breathed out slowly. It didn’t make any sense. But then what did in those strange early hours of the morning when the mind played tricks on itself? Once he’d finally bedded her he’d not only be free of this nagging physical ache but he’d also be able to think with his usual clear-headedness. After all, that was what sex did: it satisfied the body and soothed the mind.

He met her gaze. ‘I always sleep well,’ he lied, and watching her expression shift from curious to irritated, he felt a prickle of satisfaction.

That was more like it. Let her think she was a pleasurable diversion—not a compulsion that needed to be satisfied.

Feeling back in control, he stood up and, gazing out across the lagoon, he held out his hand. ‘Come on! Let’s go!’

Startled, Addie looked up at him. ‘Go where?’

He grinned. ‘To have a swim, of course.’

The lagoon was the perfect temperature and even though she was a fairly cautious swimmer, it would have been impossible for her not to enjoy herself. The warm water felt delicious on her skin, and everywhere there was something beautiful to look at. Tiny jewel-coloured fish. Shells of every shade of pink.

And Malachi.

Wearing nothing but a pair of navy trunks, his body was tugging at her gaze with the gravitational force of a black hole. She watched furtively as he pulled himself onto the deck, her eyes tracking the droplets of water trickling over his café au lait skin. He was shatteringly sexy.

Unfortunately at that moment he glanced over, and she felt her cheeks flame as she was caught in the act of watching him. Her breath faltered as he took a small run off the deck and dived back into the lagoon, cutting through the ripples towards her.

She stared at him dazedly, her brain melting. From a distance, his beauty was miraculous. Up close, it was as destabilising as an electromagnetic pulse and she could feel her resistance slipping away—

A shadow fell over her face at the same moment as a gust of air whipped up the water around them. Shocked, Addie gasped, her hand reaching out instinctively. Above them the unmistakable shadow of a helicopter hovered briefly, then swung away across the island.

‘Don’t worry!’ Malachi’s voice cut through the sudden silence that followed the helicopter’s departure. ‘They’re just dropping something off for me.’

She nodded. At some point she had ended up clutching his arm and, mortified, she withdrew her hand swiftly, ignoring the mocking glint in his eyes.

‘I might just go and get some sunblock. I don’t want to burn on my first day.’ Averting her eyes from his wet, muscular chest, she slipped past him and swam hastily across the lagoon and levered herself out onto the deck.

He was beside her in a moment, smoothing back his wet hair. ‘Would you like me to put it on your back?’ he said solicitously.

‘No. It’s fine. I probably should cover up now anyway.’ Backing away, she grabbed her dress and tugged it hurriedly over her head as, behind them, the helicopter rose up above the trees and then swiftly disappeared from view.

Gazing after it, she suddenly remembered her plans for the day. ‘Actually, I thought we could go and have a look round the island this morning,’ she said quickly, inching towards the villa. Anything to get away from his fabulous semi-naked body. ‘You know... Explore a bit.’

There was a short, tense silence. Looking up, she saw that he was watching her, his face as unyielding to her scrutiny as ever. But something was glittering in his eyes that made her heart jerk in her chest.

‘Why would we want to do that?’ he said softly. ‘It’s just more of the same.’

He paused and took a step closer, his gaze darkening in time with the beat of her heart. Reaching out, he ran his thumb along her collarbone and, hooking the front of her dress, he tugged her towards him.

‘There are far more interesting places I’d like to explore right here.’

His hand was grazing her breast, caressing, circling, making her stomach muscles curl into a ball.

‘Which reminds me—I have a little present for you.’

She followed him inside, watching warily as he walked across the kitchen to the counter and picked up a beautiful cream box tied with pale gold ribbon.

He handed it to her casually. ‘This is for you.’

She swallowed, her breath hot and scratchy in her throat. Where had that box come from? She didn’t remember seeing it earlier.

As though reading her mind, he fixed his eyes on her face. ‘I arranged for the chopper to drop it off this morning.’

Gazing into his narrowed grey eyes, Addie felt her stomach flip over. Of course, she thought weakly. It was just another example of the surreal, topsy-turvy world in which he lived. Where his every whim was magically and swiftly satisfied.

Trying not to think about how she fitted in with that particular revelation, she glanced down at the box she was holding. ‘What is it?’

‘Open it and see.’

Heart thudding, she tugged at the ribbon, struggling to undo it. Finally she pulled off the lid and, parting the feathery sheets of tissue paper, lifted out a short silk slip. It was pale gold, trimmed with delicate cream lace and utterly, utterly exquisite. She stared at it in silence, too stunned to speak.

‘Do you like it?’

She nodded. ‘It’s beautiful, Malachi. I love the colour,’ she said at last. Her cheeks grew warm. ‘But I don’t have anything for you.’ And what would she give him anyway? she thought with a needle stab of pain. The man who not only had everything but valued nothing except winning?

‘Oh, I wouldn’t say that,’ he said slowly.

He lifted his gaze, locking on to her flushed, startled face, and she felt a swirling liquid heat rise up inside as his eyes roamed over her body with open longing.

‘Try it on.’

His voice was soft, and had he been touching her she might not have heard the authority beneath the seductive tone, for he wielded his body and her response to it like a weapon, ruthlessly using every kiss, every caress, to get what he wanted.

Only she must have wanted it too.

Or why else would she be hearing herself say, ‘What? Here? Now?’?

His eyes met hers—dark, triumphant, like a runner who could see the finishing line.

He nodded slowly. ‘Yes. Here. Now. Otherwise...’ He paused, turning the word slowly over in his mouth, savouring it. ‘How can I take it off?’

Something was wrong. Yes. Here. Now. His words were ringing inside her head like a series of off-key notes. But why? The slip was a present. A gift. A spontaneous gesture designed to give pleasure. Or was it? She had no reason to doubt him, but she couldn’t shift the prickle of apprehension beneath her ribs. Why give her this today? Why not on the plane? Or yesterday?

Watching her in silence, his expression veiled, Malachi pictured her reaction, and inevitable surrender, feeling a rush of pre-emptive power. It was all part of the game. The game of seduction. And, like most games, it required nothing more than a cool head. And, of course, knowing when to make your move. It was a game he enjoyed playing. And winning.

Looking up, she found him studing her intently—and suddenly she knew why. His eyes had none of the heat or fire of a lover. Instead they were glittering down at her with a calculating coldness that made a shiver run down her spine.

She lifted her chin, her shoulders stiffening with suppressed anger. ‘Why don’t we wait until later?’ she said coolly.

He frowned. ‘Later?’

‘Yes.’ She met his gaze. ‘You know I said I wanted to explore the island? Well I arranged with Terry for him to give us a tour this morning.’

His eyes were suddenly harder than stone. ‘So unarrange it,’ he said arrogantly.

This time it was unequivocal. It was an order—clear and direct.

She glowered at him, her anger as quick and cold as a flash freeze. ‘I will not.’

There was a long, pulsing silence.

Malachi stared at her, his disbelief that she had actually rebuffed him rapidly switching to cold, hard rage. This wasn’t how it worked. Did she seriously think for one moment that she could set the agenda for this trip? Or that he was remotely interested in looking around the damn island with her? She was here for one reason and one reason only. Clearly now was the time to remind her of that fact.

‘Then I will,’ he said coldly. ‘I don’t know what fanciful little idea you’ve got in that pretty little head about why we’re here, but let me make it easy for you to understand. It has nothing to do with sightseeing.’

A muscle flickered in his jaw. He could feel his control slipping and it did nothing to improve his temper. He had wanted to demonstrate his composure in the face of her helpless desire for him. Only instead he was acting like a thwarted teenage boy.

‘And even if it did, the only sight I want to see is you. In that.’ He gestured to the slip hanging from her hand.

‘You’re a monster,’ she said shakily.

‘And you are a hypocrite. Making all this fuss—’ His breath hissed through his teeth. ‘We had an agreement. We still do.’

‘I did not agree to this. To you snapping your fingers like some sexually depraved dictator.’

He shook his head. ‘That’s not what’s happening here. You’re just having a tantrum because I called you. In my house the rules are simple, sweetheart. Either fold or play.’

She stared at him in disbelief. Did he actually think this was like a game of cards?

‘This is not a hand of poker.’ She was practically shouting. ‘This is you trampling all over my feelings.’

He shrugged. ‘I don’t care.’

It was his shrug as much as the cavalier tone in his voice that made something inside her snap. Her breath was suddenly choking her.

‘Fine,’ she snarled. ‘Have it your way.’

Pulling her dress up over her head, she yanked off her bikini top, tugged the panties down from her hips and faced him—naked.

Malachi stared at her, his face hard with fury. ‘What are you doing?’

‘Me? Oh, I’m just getting ready for sex. That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?’ Her voice was shaking, her breathing ragged. Dragging the slip over her head, careless of the delicate lace, she met his gaze. ‘So where do you want to do it, then? On the table? On the beach?’

What was the matter with her? He shook his head, trying to control his anger, his confusion. ‘You’re being melodramatic!’

There was no reason for her to act like this. She’d agreed to the deal. And the deal was about sex—not this raw emotion. So why was she making such a fuss?

She glared at him. ‘No, I am not. I’m just being truthful. But honesty was never your strong point—was it, Malachi?’

‘I never said you were just here for sex!’ His voice was rough. He had finally lost his temper.

Swearing under his breath, he ran a trembling hand through his damp hair just as there was a knock on the door. He turned, frowning, and opened his mouth to say something. But Addie cut him off.

‘Of course not. You never say what you mean to anyone! So why would today be any different?’ Pressing her finger against her forehead, she pretended to think. ‘Oh, I remember now. It’s because I’m not just anyone. I’m your wife.’

‘And I’m your husband. And you owe me a honeymoon and I always call in my debts.’

‘You are not my husband. You’re just a man who’s blackmailing me for sex.’

He took a step towards her. The skin on his face was stretched tight; his arms were braced as though invisible hands were restraining him.

‘If I’m blackmailing you, then how come I’m the one paying?’

She shook her head, her hands curling into fists. ‘That’s all you care about, isn’t it? Money. And winning. I think you’ve lived and breathed that casino air for so long you think everything’s like poker. That’s why you’re doing this. Why you’ve turned this, us, into some sort of sick fantasy game. You just can’t help youself.’

Malachi stared at her in silence, his angry response stilled in his throat. He could feel her accusation, lodged beneath his skin like a poisoned dart. Hear it inside his head. Only it wasn’t Addie’s voice but his own, saying words he’d never had the courage to say out loud. Words he should have spoken long ago to people who should have known better. His head was spinning. This wasn’t meant to be happening. He had just wanted to prove a point, but somehow he’d become the nightmare he’d been trying to escape from all his life.

He breathed in sharply, pushing aside that disturbing thought. ‘It’s not a game—’ he began.

‘Yes, it is,’ she spat at him. ‘Only you don’t even know it. You actually think it’s normal to manipulate your estranged wife into being your mistress. Or had it slipped your mind that we are still married?’

His eyes were hard and gleaming, like polished steel. ‘I hadn’t forgotten. But having not heard from you since your little outburst at our wedding reception, I’m surprised you bothered to bring it up.’

‘Why should I contact you?’ Her eyes flared with pain and anger. ‘You lied to me.’

‘I didn’t lie,’ he began. But she ignored him.

‘And when I tried to talk to you about it you didn’t want to know—’

‘It was our wedding.’ His face was as set as stone. ‘Funnily enough I thought we might have other things on our mind. Like celebrating!’

‘Celebrating what? The fact that you’d made a fool out of me. Or rather I’d made a fool out of myself. And now I’m doing it again.’

She spat the words at him, wishing they weren’t just words but bricks—something that would hurt him as he had hurt her. Was still hurting her.

‘Calm down!’ His eyes were glittering, their hostile glare fixed on her face. ‘Terry might hear you.’

‘And you wouldn’t want that, would you, Malachi?’ Her heart was thumping so hard she could hardly hear herself. ‘You wouldn’t want someone to actually hear what you’re really like. How you use people. And exploit them. And hurt them.’

‘Addie—’ He started to speak but she shook her head.

‘No. You’ve said enough.’ She forced herself to meet his gaze. ‘How can you think this is okay? Treating me like this? Like some whore?’ The word stuck in her throat and suddenly she didn’t care any more. Not about the deal she’d made with Malachi. Or the charity. Or Terry.

Blood roaring in her ears, she stared down at the slip sticking damply to her skin. She knew it was her body beneath the silk, but it didn’t feel as if it belonged to her.

‘You know, I thought nothing could ever feel as bad as when I found out I wouldn’t be able to play the piano professionally.’ It had been far worse five years ago, she thought dully. When she’d finally realised how ruthlessly Malachi had manipulated her love for him. The pain had felt like an actual wound.

How impossible it would have been then to imagine that she could sink any lower.

‘It was like the end of everything.’ Her voice trembled and she drew in a breath, pushing past the lump of misery in her throat. ‘But I faced up to it. And I turned it into something good. Only you treating me like this—it’s made me feel like I don’t matter. That I’m nothing.’

It was true. She had never felt so utterly worthless. So tainted, so sordid.

‘I don’t even know who I am any more.’ She swallowed, fighting to get her words out. ‘I just know I don’t like myself...this person I’ve become...’ Her voice faltered and failed.

Malachi felt sick. He had known about her accident but he’d had no idea that it had robbed her of her dreams. She should have told him, he thought dully. Only why would she? Right from the start he’d made it clear that his past was off limits, and he’d never once encouraged her to talk about herself.

He stared at her in silence. She looked crushed, her face pale and trembling, her beautiful blue eyes clouded with pain. But it was her hands, clenched protectively in front of her, that made his body tense with shock.

He didn’t like seeing her like that. He certainly didn’t like knowing that he was responsible. The thought made him feel guilty, ashamed. He had turned their marriage into a game. He had trapped her and tried to manipulate her into doing what he wanted. He knew just how that felt, and yet he’d hurt her as he’d been hurt. His skin burned with shame.

‘Addie—’ Reaching out, he touched her hand gently, his heart twisting as she stiffened and shrank backwards.

‘I can’t do this,’ she whispered.

With shock, he saw the sheen of tears in her eyes. He had never seen her cry and his throat felt tight. He didn’t want to feel her pain. Didn’t want to feel anything. But he had hurt her, and for the first time in a long, long time he wanted to face the pain. Her pain. Face it and erase it.

He took a step closer. ‘Please listen to me, sweetheart.’

But, refusing to meet his gaze, she edged further away from his hand.

He stared at her uncertainly. What was he supposed to say? A cold, dull ache was seeping through his veins and he felt completely out of his depth. He’d spent most of his life avoiding scenes and confrontations, shunning anything remotely emotional, but as his eyes fixed on Addie’s stricken face he felt his heart contract.

Suddenly his desires didn’t seem all that important in comparison with comforting her. With helping her rebuild what he had so ruthlessly crushed.

He took a deep breath. ‘I’m not a good person, Addie. I know that. But I swear it wasn’t my intention to hurt you. And I can prove it to you if you let me. Please, Addie, let me make this right.’

‘How can you?’ she said flatly. ‘Look what we’re doing to each other. To our marriage. It’s just so wrong—’

‘It doesn’t have to be like this.’

She heard him inhale and, looking up, saw that his eyes were fixed on her face, his expression strained.

‘We can start over.’

For a moment she didn’t reply and he held his breath, watching, waiting, until finally she lifted her head and sighed.

‘I don’t know what that means. But you’d better go and talk to Terry. I’m sure he’s got better things to do than stand around on your doorstep.’

He nodded and walked swiftly into the hallway. She heard the door open and a muffled conversation. Moments later, the door closed and he returned.

‘He’s gone.’ He met her gaze. ‘Do you want me to go too?’

His face was set, and yet he seemed less self-assured than usual—as though he wasn’t quite certain of her reply.

She gazed at him in silence. Was he playing with her? Or was he trying to make amends? Finally, she shook her head. ‘No. I don’t want you to go.’’

He breathed out slowly. ‘I meant what I said, sweetheart. About starting again.’

She watched in silence as, hesitantly, he reached out and touched her face.

‘I want it to be good between us here.’

She bit her lip. ‘Think about what’s happening here, Malachi. I sold myself to you.’

Shaking his head, he stroked her cheek gently. ‘Look at it this way: I can only afford you for a month.’

She gave him a tiny smile. ‘Nice try! But I know a bluff when I hear one.’

‘I’m not bluffing. You’re a Royal Flush, sweetheart.’

He watched her face shift, the hurt showing through, and feeling a spasm of panic he reached out and grabbed her hands.

‘I’m sorry. That was crass. I know you probably find this hard to believe, but not every thought I have is about poker.’ He hesitated. ‘Some are about you. Quite a lot, actually.’ He felt her hands stiffen and, curling his fingers more tightly, he shook his head. ‘I don’t mean those kind of thoughts. I mean about you. The person you are.’

Addie stared at him in confusion. Was this really her uber-cool husband? He looked anything but cool. In fact he looked nervous, almost as though he didn’t quite know what he was saying or doing.

She bit her lip. ‘And who am I?’

His hands tightened around hers. ‘You’re a fighter. And a dreamer. Look at how you came back stronger after your accident.

‘It stopped you from doing what you loved most but you didn’t stop. You started a charity. Most people would have given up.’

Addie eyes him wearily. ‘You wouldn’t.’

Her voice was quiet, but steadier, and he felt his heart lurch with hope. Maybe he hadn’t ruined everything between them.

‘No. It wouldn’t have made me stronger. Or kinder.’ But this wasn’t about him. It was about Addie. ‘I think you’re one of the bravest people I know, sweetheart,’ he said gently. ‘And I’m really sorry for being such a jerk.’ Tentatively, he slid his hand over her shoulder. ‘Truly. I know it’s not enough, but it’s a start, isn’t it?’ He breathed out slowly. ‘Please, can we try again? Please?’

His eyes met hers and finally she nodded mutely.

He made as though to pull her against him and then, breathing out slowly, he turned and, reaching round, picked up her clothes from the floor. ‘Here. Put these on.’

Averting his gaze, he waited until she was dressed and then slowly wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close.

‘Thank you.’ Gently, he kissed the top of her head. ‘And now, how about we go and take a look around this island?’