Читать книгу Lilac Wedding in Dry Creek - Janet Tronstad - Страница 9

Something wasn’t right, Jake told himself for the second time that day as he drove his pickup under the overhang in front of the hotel and pulled it to a stop. An hour had passed since he left. He watched the rain drip off the side of the awning as he struggled to figure out what was wrong. The same sense of unease had been niggling away at him all the way to the airport and back, but he didn’t know what was causing it.

Everything seemed to be in order, he finally told himself as he turned off his windshield wipers and then the ignition. The sky was still overcast and the air felt damp inside his cab. Nothing seemed out of place.

He’d gotten the claim tickets from Cat to retrieve her luggage so he knew he had the right suitcases. He’d even stopped at the dealership where he’d bought his pickup several months ago and they had given him a special child’s safety seat for the back of his extended cab. They’d strapped it in and he had picked out a green frog-shaped lollipop from the ones they offered and left it for Lara on the seat. He hoped it was close enough to a toad to make her giggle.

Then he’d filled his vehicle with gas. His duffel bag was tucked behind the passenger’s seat. His suit was in a garment bag, hanging on the hook by the rear window. He had a wad of cash in his pocket and a credit card in his wallet.

He thought a minute longer. Check and doublecheck. Everything was ready. Nothing was out of place or forgotten. He opened the door on the driver’s side of the pickup and stepped down to the slick pavement. At that moment, Cat pushed open the hotel door and stepped outside. Strands of her brown hair trailed across her face and she looked tired as she took a step toward him.

Jake turned so he could open the rear door to his pickup. Then he stepped toward her. “Have you been sleeping okay lately?” he asked.

She nodded, her teeth chattering. She was wearing the same green sweater she’d had on earlier and it didn’t look thick enough to keep anyone warm. He was surprised she hadn’t planned better for the trip. A quick check on any of the weather sites would have told her rain and cold were forecast for this area. He didn’t think she had even a heavy coat with her.

He suddenly realized what was troubling him. Nothing had been planned about all of this. His intuition was right. A man should never count on random luck. There was always a reason for everything. And Cat coming to him now had no reason that he could see. She hadn’t even written to tell him they’d had a baby four years ago. What had changed in all that time? Why had she come now?

Jake looked at her. “Anything I need to know?”

She stood there, her face damp from stray raindrops and her hair limp.

Even as worn out as she looked, she was beautiful. He didn’t want to wonder why she was here. He’d love to believe his charm had brought her back after all of these years. Her eyes were not looking at him, though, and that meant something was wrong.

“I haven’t been sending you enough money,” he finally said, making a guess as he reached for the bills he’d just put in his pocket for the trip. She was too proud to ask, but she must need something. He pulled out a wad of fifties. “I can stop at my bank again on the way out of town for more. Just let me know how much.”

“I’m fine,” Cat said with no emotion in her voice. “You’ve already sent me more money over the years than I could have expected—so, thank you.”

Then she looked up at him and smiled.

“Still, you must need more,” he insisted, watching her. She was too pale. “I refuse to let you live on those noodle cups. They wouldn’t keep a bird alive.”

After she’d run away from her first foster-care home, she had lived on the streets of Fargo. Sometimes she had jimmied vending machines in the bus station and stolen the noodle packets if she was really hungry. Then she’d gotten hot water from the coffee machine and had dinner. She only permitted herself to steal the noodles if she hadn’t eaten for a few days and then she went back as soon as she could and left the payment in the suggestion box at the station, saying it was for the vending-machine guys. He wondered how long she’d gone this time without eating.

“You do remember those noodle packets?” he prodded further, because she hadn’t answered.

The Cat he remembered would tell him to mind his own business about now. But she just kept smiling. She was trying too hard to show him that everything was all right. If he didn’t know her so well, he would believe her act. But she had a little too much blush on her face. And her smile was too wide. And she moved as if her body ached.

“Had the flu recently?” Jake tried again. Obviously Cat wasn’t anxious to tell him what was wrong, but something was. Maybe she hadn’t been able to work for a while and was short on money. Or maybe Lara needed braces or ballet lessons.

Cat shook her head and just stood there.

Jake had learned a few things from playing poker. He knew how to recognize a bluff in all its disguises and the emotion flashing on her face might as well have been a scarlet letter. There had to be a reason why she was here. She just didn’t want him to know. And she felt bad about it all at the same time.

“You want a new life,” Jake finally guessed in defeat. What else could it be? The day wasn’t so grand after all. It was starting to rain heavy again and he felt foolish for having rushed around getting them ready for a trip that might not happen. “You wanted me to meet Lara because you feel I have a right to that much, but you’re getting ready to marry some man you’ve met and you’re not planning to give me much more than today. So this is my one shot at seeing her.”

“Huh?” She was huddled just outside the backseat of the cab and she had one hand on the bars of the car seat. The rain was beating steady on the overhang above them.

“Who is he?” Jake demanded to know. Even if Jake couldn’t be a proper father to Lara, it still rankled that some other man would be standing in his place.

Just then a streak of lightning flashed across the sky and there was a loud clap of thunder.

“Who is who?” Cat repeated with a frown. “What are you talking about? I hope you have a heater in this pickup.”

“It’s brand new. Right off the lot,” Jake assured her, and all of the fight went out of him. He was going to mess this up; he knew it. But it certainly wasn’t Cat’s fault. And every girl deserved a father. No one would have to look far to find a better one than him.

“It’s nice.” Cat reached over and ran her hands across the leather seats.

Finally, he let his bitterness fade away as he remembered. “Not like that old pickup I used to have at the home. I had to put an old blanket over the front seat so the springs didn’t poke through quite so much. You’ll be comfortable in this one. I promise.”

She smiled at him and he knew she could still picture the beat-up old thing, too. Of course, how could anyone forget it? The red paint had been scraped off one whole fender before he even bought it. The side window hadn’t rolled up for the previous two owners and the heater barely worked. But he’d been proud as could be of that old pickup. He’d driven Cat into town for dinner the day he closed the deal and the pickup could have been a Jaguar the way it made him feel.

“I wonder if Millie’s Café is still there,” he said, lost in the memory of that night long ago.

She nodded. “I ate there a few months ago. They still have those barbecue beef sandwiches we used to like. The ones with the dill pickles on the side.”

“You were at the home?” Now, that surprised him. They’d both vowed never to go back there once they managed to leave.

She nodded. “I wanted to get some of my records from when I was a resident.”

“They must have told you I was looking for you.” Jake found he couldn’t let the subject go. The only reason he’d gone back to the home was to try and find her. “Why didn’t you come see me then? Or call even. I made sure they had my phone number at the home.”

“I was …” She started and stopped. She looked so miserable he felt sorry for her. Then she continued. “It’s not what you think. There isn’t a man in my life or anything like that. I wouldn’t keep you from seeing Lara even if there was.”

The elastic band around Jake’s chest relaxed. He didn’t know how they’d resolve this, but he was glad she hadn’t already replaced him. He stepped closer and lifted her chin so he could look her in the eyes. She smiled at him now and her eyes deepened. This was the Cat he knew.

“I want to be in your life.” He could hear the rain hitting the awning overhead and for the first time it sounded gentle as it fell. “And Lara’s life, too. Just a little bit. I know we can’t tell her. And I know you’re probably worried that I’ll turn out like my father, but I promise I would never raise a hand to either one of you. I—”

“Oh, I never thought that,” Cat said. She looked genuinely horrified. “I never thought you were like that. I know you would never do anything to harm someone.”

Her eyes looked at him with a sincerity he couldn’t question.

He nodded in relief. “Anything else we can handle, then.”

She didn’t answer him, but he figured they had settled the big questions. She was letting him be a part of Lara’s life. And hers in some way. For now, that would be enough.

He cleared his throat to say how grateful he was, but she was already turning.

“Speaking of Lara, I better go get her,” Cat said, as she started walking back to the hotel lobby.

Jake looked through the glass windows and saw Max bringing the girl to the door. She was carrying a white box that he guessed held what was left of her birthday cake. Knowing Max, he had packed some plastic spoons and napkins in the paper bag he was carrying out to them, as well.

“Now you call me when you get to Dry Creek,” Max said as he led Lara to the pickup.

Jake figured he was talking to all of them even though he was looking at the girl.

“We’ll probably call you before that,” Jake said as he held up his cell phone to remind Max. “You won’t even have time enough to miss us.”

“See that I don’t,” Max said as he turned to the backseat.

“You got your own special chair there,” the older man said to the girl as he lifted her up to the car seat. “I’ll let your fa—I mean, your mother buckle you in.”

Lara squealed when she saw the lollipop and grabbed it. Then she looked at Jake and grinned.

“A frog for you to kiss,” he said, feeling more pleased with himself than he should.

Lara giggled at that. “I’ll make him a prince.”

“You sure will,” Jake said.

Max stepped back and Cat moved close to the door where she could reach the car seat.

“Don’t open the lollipop yet,” Cat said as she started buckling the girl in. “You just had all of that cake.”

Max shifted beside Jake. “Sorry about my slip.”

“Don’t worry,” Jake assured him. It was hard to keep the news contained. It was like fizz in a bottle that had been shaken up and was looking for someplace to go. Then he leaned closer to his friend. “They’ll visit us again.”

Max nodded. “Good, because I can’t think of anything else.”

“I won’t be a real father, of course.” Jake felt obliged to tell the older man.

“Why not?” Max demanded.

Jake shook his head. “We’ll talk about it when I get back.”

He looked at the frown on his friend’s face. Maybe he needed to say more.

“I’d be a terrible father,” he added, his voice low so that no one but Max would hear. “And, you know, Lara thinks her father is a prince somewhere who rides on a dragon taking gifts to poor people. Even a mortal with a normal childhood would have a hard time competing with that. So, it’s best this way.”

“I don’t think—” Max started and then stopped when Jake raised a hand in caution.

By that time, Cat had finished adjusting all the straps on the car seat so Lara was both safe and comfortable. Cat closed the door on the backseat and started walking around the pickup to the passenger seat.

“We’ll be back in no time at all,” Jake said, trying to keep the tone of his voice even.

“You should have good roads to Salt Lake, at least,” Max said as Jake opened the driver’s door. Then the older man put his hand in his back pocket and pulled out an envelope. “I almost forgot. You won’t need a stamp for this now.”

“Thanks.” Jake took the envelope and threw it into the passenger seat as Cat opened the door. He looked up at the older man and saw him smile before he stepped away from the cab window.

“What’s this?” Cat said as she slid it over so she could climb in and sit on the seat.

“It’s yours,” Jake replied.

Cat didn’t pick up the envelope, but she did move it so it didn’t fall off the seat.

Jake settled himself behind the wheel. He figured she knew what was in the envelope since her name was on it.

By then, Max had stepped back to the lobby door and had turned to wave at them as Jake started the pickup.

“It’ll be dark by the time we get to Salt Lake,” Jake said to Cat as he started driving. He turned onto the street in front of the Starling. “We should make good time, though.”

The leather on the seats was softer than Cat had thought when she’d touched it earlier. The warmth of the blankets made her drowsy. She’d been so tired lately. First it was all the doctors and then flying here with Lara. Being with Jake made her feel as though she could let go of some of the burden and, before she knew it, her eyes drifted closed. The next time she opened them it was dark outside. She saw the red taillights of a string of cars ahead of them.

“Where are we?” She was groggy but tried to sit up straight.

“We passed Salt Lake City a half hour ago. It’s about seven in the evening.”

Cat had only meant to close her eyes for a moment. She turned to glance in the backseat and saw that Lara was soundly sleeping in her car seat.

“She’s fine,” Jake said. “I asked her to be quiet so you could get some rest.”

“You didn’t need to do that,” Cat protested, still facing the back. She studied her daughter’s peaceful face. “Lara’s my responsibility.”

“Not completely. Not anymore.”

Cat turned around and sagged against the seat at his words. Relief flooded over her. She hadn’t even had to ask. He was accepting their daughter.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

“You don’t need to thank me.”

The lights from a passing car shone in the cab for a second. Shadows lifted from Jake’s face and she felt the urge to reach over and touch his cheek. His expression was so solemn, though, that she didn’t dare.

“I still appreciate it,” she said quietly, wondering if he would remember this conversation later.

“It’s my duty,” he added, and she felt her heart squeeze. “Just let me know how much you need.”

“You mean money?”

“Of course.”

Money would never be enough. She could not leave Lara with him unless he came to love her. Duty wasn’t enough. Not when her daughter had just started to believe in happy endings. As she faced her possible death, only one thing was important. She wanted her daughter to live with hope and love in her life. She wanted her to have something as close to a fairy-tale life as possible.

“I’ve been thinking about it.” Jake turned to her and smiled. “Like Max mentioned, my mother and brother are both living on the family ranch now. How do you want me to introduce you to them?”

“What?”

“An old classmate? Someone from the home?”

“Do we need to say?”

“My brother will pester you to death if he thinks there’s any chance you would marry me,” Jake continued with a grin. “I’m not sure I would wish that on anyone. He has this fantasy about me getting married and settling down on the ranch. He’s even got a hill picked out with a place to build my house.”

A shot of pure longing went through Cat. “Would that be such a bad life? To live in Dry Creek?”

Jake was silent for a moment, the darkness hiding any expression on his face.

“Years ago I would have said it would be a fine life.” His voice was strained. “But after all that happened to my family there, I’m not sure I could live in the community.”

“You’re not responsible for your mother killing your father.”

“Oh, but she didn’t.” Jake turned to look over at her. “I forgot you didn’t know. She thought my older brother, Wade, had done it and, when the prosecution wanted to call him to the stand, she confessed to stop them. She didn’t want him going to prison if she could help it.”

“Oh, my.” Cat let that sink into her mind. She could understand how a mother would do that. “You always said you didn’t think she had killed him.”

Jake nodded. “No one listened to me.”

Another minute went by before he continued. “Those people sent my mother to prison and she hadn’t even committed any crime except trying to look out for her son. They heard the Stone name and just assumed she had done it.”

“But she told them she had. And Wade—did he?”

“No, he didn’t do it, either,” Jake said curtly. “That’s why it’s so upsetting. Those people couldn’t see past their prejudices. If they had worked harder on looking at the evidence—or the lack of it—our family would have stayed together and everything would be different now.”

The cab was completely dark. There were no lights from cars pulling up behind them. But Cat reached out anyway and ran her fingers softly down Jake’s cheek. “I’m so sorry.”

He reached a hand up to capture hers and turned it so he could kiss the inside of her palm. Then he curled her fingers around the place where his lips had pressed. “You’re a good friend to me, Cat Barker.”

He released her hand and she brought it back to her lap.

“That’s what I’m going to tell Wade,” Jake announced suddenly. “You’re my best friend and he’ll just have to let go of his curiosity.”

Cat nodded and blinked. She had no right to tears. She didn’t even want him to say she was his girlfriend. She had nothing to offer Jake except Lara, anyway. It had to all be about their daughter.

“My mother is going to love Lara,” Jake continued, as though he could read her mind. “She won’t need to think she’s related to make a fuss over her …” Jake stopped. “It could have all been different. I should have never let you run away from that home. I should have made you marry me.”

“And what would we have done then?” Cat asked. She had been through all that in her mind over the years. “Neither one of us had a job. Or any reason to think we could get one. We hadn’t even graduated from high school. All you had was that old pickup and it didn’t run half of the time. We didn’t have a way to make a life together. Besides, you didn’t want to get married.”

She thought she had buried the anguish of those days, but it still vibrated inside her. She had never been as scared in all of her life as she had been when she realized she was pregnant.

“At least I could have taken care of you better,” Jake replied, his tone tense. “I could have found some kind of a job. I have a strong back. I could have dug post-holes or something. Even if we didn’t stay together, we should have made it legal. What did you do alone?”

“Mrs. Jenna—you remember the nurse at the home—she sent me to another home for unwed mothers. I had a doctor’s care. And learned how to take care of a baby. It was the best thing.”

“And did the home suggest you not tell me about the baby?”

Cat nodded her head in the dark. “I’m sorry if that hurt you, but one of the conditions of staying was that I couldn’t talk to you. It was a silly rule they had at the home.”

“You could have told me later.”

Cat closed her eyes and whispered, “By then, I thought you knew. When I got the first envelope of money, I figured you had to have been told by someone. And you never sent a letter. I thought you didn’t want to hear from me.”

“I always had a return address on those envelopes.”

Cat heard a rustling in the backseat.

“Mommy.”

“We’ll talk later,” Cat whispered to Jake before turning to their daughter. “How are you, pumpkin?”

“I’m hungry.”

“We’ll stop someplace,” Jake said, passing an exit.

“We could just get something at a gas station. I don’t feel like going into a restaurant and sitting down.”

“Usually a gas station only has hot dogs at this time of night.”

Cat shrugged. She didn’t have the energy to persuade him otherwise. She just hoped her money held out until she could get back to Minneapolis. She was determined to not open the envelope of money he’d laid on the seat before they began. She had moved it to the cup holder between their two seats. If it was charity, she didn’t want it.

He pulled off at an exit that had a fast-food sign.

“I’m going to meet your mother,” Cat finally said, suddenly realizing what that meant. “And I didn’t bring a dress.”

One thing she knew about Jake was that he loved his mother. He’d written to the woman often from the home and Cat had envied him having someone. She couldn’t even remember her mother. She had a grandmother who had taken care of her until she died. Then Cat had been out on her own.