Читать книгу Heart Surgeon To Single Dad - Janice Lynn - Страница 12

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CHAPTER THREE

“I WANT TO make love to you, Natalie,” Matthew told her as the elevator doors slid shut behind them.

Natalie’s breath caught.

“But—” he began.

No! She didn’t want there to be a “but”. Please, the one time she was willing to just let go and have a fling with a man, don’t let him have a reason they couldn’t.

With his free hand he pressed the door-close button rather than a floor number, then continued. “I don’t want to deceive you in any way, and, if we go further without my telling you the truth, that’s what I’d feel I was doing.”

Had he lied to her earlier? Was there someone special in his life?

Please don’t be married or engaged or whatever it is that’s so horrible that you have to confess before having sex.

“You’re a beautiful, intelligent woman and deserve better than anything I’m able to give. Which is why I need to explain all the reasons why you should tell me no.” He took a deep breath, kept those pale blue eyes locked with hers. “Beyond the next three days, I have nothing to offer to you or any woman.”

Natalie’s breath caught, at his words and at his hand still clenching hers.

“I don’t understand,” she admitted, trying to make sense of what he was saying.

“What I’ve wanted from the moment you stepped off this elevator before dinner was to put you right back on it, go to one of our rooms and not come out for hours.”

He watched her as if he half expected her to pull her hand free and slap him.

As if.

“You’re not married?”

His look of shock gave answer before his words.

“There’s no other woman in my life, Natalie. It’s just that my life is complicated, and letting you think there could be anything beyond the next three days would be wrong. Whatever happens between us this weekend ends when we leave Miami on Sunday. When deciding what floor this elevator stops on, keep that in mind.”

So neither of them wanted anything beyond the next three days, and time was too precious to waste. She wanted him. He wanted her. They didn’t need to know anything more about each other.

Well, almost nothing more.

“Are you...?” How did she ask this? She’d been a virgin with Jonathan and was screened annually at the hospital, so she hadn’t had to do blood tests or anything of the sort. Trying to convince her it was time for them to take that next step, he’d gone on his own and given her a copy of his lab tests prior to their becoming physically involved. As time and their busy schedules had allowed, they’d fallen into a mutually satisfying relationship.

Or maybe it hadn’t been so mutually satisfying, since he’d been having sex with another woman.

Ugh. No. She was not going to let thoughts of Jonathan’s infidelity creep into this moment. All she needed to know was—how did couples usually bring up a clean bill of health? Or did they? No matter what other couples did. She would ask.

“I mean, do you have...?” She struggled to find the right words.

“I’m clean, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Relief filled her at his answer and at how easily he’d known what she was asking.

“Me, too,” Natalie assured, excitement coursing through her. Excitement and heat. White-hot heat that burned at her very core. She wanted Matthew. More than she’d ever wanted any man. Mentally and physically. She. Wanted. Him.

She reached for his hand. “We both know what we want, and it isn’t a relationship.” There. She’d said it. There could be no confusion. “So, truly, your comments, while gentlemanly, are a waste of valuable time when you could be impressing me in ways I’d appreciate much more.” Her boldness surprised her, but good grief, he seemed intent on being a gentleman when what she wanted was a rogue lover setting her body on fire. “My room is on the eleventh floor.” She reached over and pressed the button. “Are you getting off with me or not?”

* * *

Despite her brave invitation, Natalie’s hands trembled as she slid her card into the key slot. Her heart pounded as the little green lights flashed and she twisted the handle, opening the door to let Matthew into her hotel room.

Even as her feet moved, carrying her inside, she asked herself how this worked. Did she go to the bathroom and freshen up? Did he? Did she just take off her clothes and get into bed, as Jonathan had always preferred?

Once they were inside the room and she heard him secure the lock, she turned to him, hoping to break the silence that had enveloped them on their ascent to her room.

Before she could get a word out, Matthew pushed her back a couple of steps to sandwich her between the wall and his hard body, his mouth covering hers. There was nothing slow, indecisive or gentlemanly in his touch.

Finally, she thought.

His mouth was ravenous. His hands roaming over her body voracious. His lean hips pressing against her belly giving proclamation of just how much he wanted her.

She kissed him, touched him with equal intensity, running her hands over his arms, his shoulders, cupping his face in her hands as his kiss deepened.

One little kiss and they’d gone straight to fast and furious.

Ha. There was nothing little about how Matthew was kissing her. Big. Huge. Gigantic. That was how his kisses felt.

That was how his body felt grinding against her.

Fireworks went off in her head, in her chest, her whole body, at his mouth moving over hers, at his hands sliding over her, tugging her blouse from her skirt and letting in a swoosh of welcome cool air across her sensitized flesh.

“I can’t believe you’re here, that we’re doing this,” she murmured as he traced kisses along her neck, her collarbone. She dug her fingers into his hair.

“You aren’t changing your mind, are you?” he breathed against the indentation at her throat, his tongue darting out to dip into the sensitive flesh.

Natalie quivered.

“No. Never.” She arched against his mouth. “This is what I have played over and over in my mind today.”

What she needed. Crazy, but she did need him—this virtual stranger who was setting her body on fire. His touch, his kiss, his full attention. His body grinding against hers, hard, lean, thrilling.

“Tell me what you want, Natalie,” he coaxed, pushing her blouse off her shoulders and letting the silky material pool around her red heels, revealing her lacy white camisole and matching bra beneath. Cupping her bottom, he bent, kissing the valley between her breasts. “Tell me what you’ve been imagining us doing.”

“That,” she breathed, running her fingers into his thick, inky dark hair and holding him to her breast. “I like that.”

That. That. That, her body screamed.

“Me, too.” Pushing aside her camisole and bra, he took a puckered nipple into his mouth and gave a gentle tug.

Natalie almost died. Or exploded. Or imploded. Or all of the above, so many sensations shot through her electrified body. His hands held urgency as he continued to caress her, his mouth claiming everything in its passionate path. Within breathless minutes he pushed her skirt up her hips to bunch at her waist so he could slide his hands inside her panties to cup her bottom once more.

Yeah, she wanted that, too.

His hands were hot on her skin, electrifying. She wanted him. Desperately. She kissed him with that desperation. Touched him with that desperation. Moved her body against his with that desperation. Her fingers found their way to his waist, to where he strained against his dress pants’ zipper. After a moment’s fumbling, she had his pants to where she could touch him. She explored what she craved to feel deep inside.

“Natalie,” he groaned. Or maybe he’d growled.

Either way, she’d never heard her name said as Matthew had just said it. Had never felt the power filling her at how he responded to her slightest touch.

“I like this, too,” she whispered close to his ear, in awe at how free she felt to touch him, at how uninhibited to give and take as she pleased. She’d never felt this freedom with Jonathan. She had always followed his lead rather than blazing a path of her own. “I like touching you and feeling your reaction and knowing I did that.”

He mumbled something against her throat, where his mouth was wreaking havoc on her nervous system, but she didn’t catch his words. They didn’t matter. His body was telling her all she needed to know.

“I like what you’re doing,” she continued, barely recognizing her voice, but further emboldened by the fervor of his kisses. “I like the way you’re touching me, as if you need to touch me.” She’d never felt more desirable than in this moment, than the way his touch made her feel. He made her feel beautiful, desirable, wanton even. Unlike anything she’d ever felt or would possibly ever feel again. The knowledge promised ecstasy.

“That makes two of us,” he assured her, between more ardent kisses.

“I like the way you’re looking at me,” she continued, her voice breathy, her fingers tightening around him. “As if you want to put every detail of me to memory.”

* * *

Matthew didn’t have to put every detail of Natalie to memory.

She was already there.

Every delectable inch of her.

He had no doubt he’d never forget what was happening. She was timeless, beautiful. Unforgettable.

Barely hanging on to his sanity, he took her hands into his, kissed her fingertips, then pressed against her. Eyes locked with his, her fingers moved to his shoulders, kneaded deep into his muscles as he grazed her lips with his teeth.

“More,” she breathed, arching into his touch. “I want more.”

Completely caught between him and the wall, she shifted her hips against him, pressing her upper body against the wall to give added pressure to the sensuous contact between their bodies.

A long leg slid up his, wrapped itself around his waist, pressing her pelvis more fully against where he throbbed.

Heaven help him.

They were barely inside her hotel room door and he was about to rip off her panties and take her like a madman. He’d meant to take her slow, to kiss her all over, and when she was ready, take them both over the edge.

Her body was ready now.

He could feel her damp heat burning into him and that reality undid every good intention he had of slow. Her mouth was against his now, hard and demanding. Her hands tugged at his shirt, managing to pull the material loose. He wasn’t sure if she’d unbuttoned it or popped every button. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was having her.

She made him manic, illogical, driven by physical need in ways he didn’t understand.

“Now,” she urged, her fingernails raking over his back, then gripping his buttocks to pull him tighter against her. “I want you inside me now.”

Matthew didn’t need to be told twice. Supporting her weight between his body and the wall, he reached into his sagging back pocket for his wallet, pulling out a condom.

“I only have one of these,” he confessed, ripping it open and making haste of putting it on. “I have the feeling I’m going to wish I had a dozen more before morning.”

Her eyes molten honey, Natalie kissed his mouth, hard, full of passion, and, keeping her eyes locked with his, she guided him to his own personal heaven.

* * *

Natalie’s boldness shocked her. Her boldness in how she touched Matthew, in how she wrapped both legs around his waist and took him deep inside her body with her skirt bunched at her waist and her panties pushed aside.

Her boldness in the things she said to him, in how vocal she was about what she wanted from him and to do to him.

Even more, she was shocked by how she bit down on his shoulder to keep from crying out as an orgasm rocked her body at his powerful thrusts.

Wave after wave of pleasure ripped through her.

If not for the wall, his strong body against hers, she’d have dropped to the floor to float her way back to the land of mere mortal beings.

She thought he’d climaxed with her, but he must have somehow held back. Rather than relax against her as she’d expected, he kept moving, pounding against her as she peaked in pleasure, then started the cataclysmic climb all over again, leaving her frantically moving against him until she went places she’d never been, to heights she’d never scaled, until she went into a blissful free fall that might go on for days.

Weeks.

Just when her orgasm began to spiral out of control, his willpower broke and her body became unwound with him, every nerve cell inside her zinging to life and exploding with a heated force so amazing she couldn’t believe her body remained intact.

Intact? More like turned inside out and back again.

From her biased, soaring view, this man lost in passion was a glorious thing.

A satisfied Matthew’s damp forehead dropping to rest against hers as he stared into her eyes was splendid. The way her body felt was beautiful. Everything felt so beautiful that Natalie wondered if orgasms were mind-altering.

Her mind had definitely been altered.

“If I’d known this was how it would be, we’d have never made it off the elevator.”

Looking a bit mind-altered himself, Matthew laughed. “You might be right.”

“Might be?” She squeezed her thighs, loving how his eyes darkened instantly in response. He kissed her forehead, and when his gaze met hers there was a contentment in his eyes that puffed up her chest.

She smiled at him with a confidence she didn’t understand, but that felt addictive. Yeah, they’d had amazing sex. This was the after part. Shouldn’t she feel awkward? Embarrassed by her daring?

She didn’t. She felt... She searched for a way to describe what she felt. More connected with him than with any person she’d ever known. How could she feel that way with someone she’d just met? Much freer than she’d ever been with Jonathan. She’d enjoyed their sex life, but, compared to what she had just experienced, sex with Jonathan had been boring. And not only because she’d just been pushed up against a wall still half-dressed and ravaged, rather than in bed with calm, intentional acts meant to please.

The way her body had responded was what had been different.

Matthew electrified every nerve ending, making her aware of every cell, every nuance of her body, of his body. She’d never had orgasms like those she’d just experienced. Maybe no woman had ever experienced orgasms like the ones Matthew had just given to her.

Whether it was how she’d admired his mind for years or how his sex appeal had toyed with her psyche from the moment she’d laid eyes on him, everything about this moment felt right. Perfect. For that, she hugged him.

His forehead still against hers, his breathing ragged, he searched her eyes. “What was that for?”

“A token of my appreciation.” Legs feeling a little shaky, she lowered them from his waist to tentatively support her weight. She felt so languid, she might collapse on the floor.

“I’m the one who needs to be expressing my gratitude, and my apologies for not hauling your delectable body up here the moment that first workshop finished.”

“No worries. I have every intention of giving you lots of opportunity to express your, um, gratitude.” Her tone was flirty and it felt good. “And to let you make up for wasting time.”

Had she ever flirted with a man before?

She’d always been focused on school, on her patients, her research, her career. Focusing on a man hadn’t ever been a priority. But she liked flirting with Matthew, liked the quick smile that transformed his handsome face.

Reaching for her skirt, she tugged the wrinkled material down her hips, then pressed a quick kiss to his lips. Aware that his gaze tracked her every move, she walked to the mini-fridge, took out a bottled water, twisted off the lid and took a drink.

“Thirsty?” She offered the bottle.

He took a long swig, then handed it back to her. “Not now.”

His tone implied it hadn’t been the water that had quenched his thirst.

Eyeing him, Natalie placed her lips over where his had been and took another drink, letting the water cool her throat.

“Thank you, Natalie.”

“For?”

“You know.” Winking at her, he went to the bathroom, she assumed to dispose of the used condom, then returned to the room with his pants restored.

That was when she got her first real look at his chest and abdomen. Earlier, she’d been distracted with need and sex, and had been up close to his body, but now... Oh, my.

Matthew without a shirt was a beautiful sight.

She’d touched that chest, kissed that chest, been pressed up against that chest, all hot and sweaty.

Feeling quite smug that she’d just had sex with the hottest man alive, she couldn’t help but smile. “Now what?”

He shrugged. “Not any more of that, unless we make a protection run, I’m sad to say.”

She eyed him curiously. She’d not really considered that they could have a repeat that night. Jonathan had never more than once... Oh, forget Jonathan. “Would you really be able to do that again?”

“Just say the word.”

Surely he was exaggerating, but his answer still stroked her ego. She knew she shouldn’t keep comparing what had just happened to her relationship with her ex, but he’d have rolled over and been asleep already.

Then again, she would have been, too.

Intrigued, and more than a little smug, she asked, “If I said now, you’d want to again tonight?”

He arched a brow. “You have to ask after what we just did? Of course I want to do that again.”

* * *

“One box isn’t enough. Buy two.”

Matthew grinned at the woman tugging at his arm and grabbed another box off the shelf. “Two boxes for three nights? You trying to kill me?”

“You’re the one who bragged you were able to repeat the deed anytime I said the word,” she reminded with a saucy flash of her eyes.

Wondering why he’d ever hesitated in allowing himself this three-day break from reality, Matthew laughed. “You saying the word? If so, I’m sure we can find a vacant corridor.”

Her eyes widened momentarily, but she quickly looked intrigued. So much for his prim and proper impression of her at the airport. Thank God he’d given himself permission to forget the real world and just play for three days. Three days to spend with this surprising woman.

Chuckling, he grabbed her hand. “Come on, Natalie. Let’s go pay for our two boxes.”

They’d opted to walk the beach to a neighboring hotel’s gift shop rather than risk one of their colleagues seeing them stock up at the conference hotel. Matthew had enjoyed the sea air and having Natalie’s hand clasped within his during the nighttime walk, but the fifteen minutes back to their hotel suddenly seemed like a long time.

“How did you get involved with the Libertine robot project?” she asked once they were back on the beach and headed toward their hotel.

“You want to talk shop?” He just wanted to get back to the hotel and get her naked. Completely this time. He had a lot of exploring to do and was looking forward to discovering every nook and cranny.

“The Libertine fascinates me,” she continued, her hand snug in his. “I’ve watched you perform surgery with it, you know.”

He shot a look at her, the moonlight casting just enough light across her face to illuminate her beautiful features. “No, I didn’t know.”

“I couldn’t tell much about you, since you were wearing a surgical mask, glasses and cap and the film clip pretty much only showed the surgery. I guess technically I watched a video of your hands doing miraculous things, because I don’t recall anything of your face and I wouldn’t have forgotten your eyes had I ever seen them.” She smiled sheepishly, then went on. “From how long I’ve been seeing your name quoted in the cardiology world, I had thought you much older.”

He got that a lot. He’d been fortunate to become involved with the Libertine from early in its inception as a surgical tool. Near the end of med school, his passion had shifted his interest to surgical advances being made in treating congenital defects in utero. Robert had followed suit.

Working for a robotics company, Carolyn had been one of the key design engineers on the Libertine. It was how they’d all met. He and Robert had been practically inseparable since grade school. Carolyn had changed that somewhat, but Matthew had felt more as if they’d added a third player to their team, rather than their friendship losing anything, when his best friend married the brilliant engineer.

He missed them so much. Three months and it didn’t seem real that he’d never see them again, never discuss the Libertine, or difficult cases. Never catch another football game while Carolyn laughed at their long-term rivalry of the Cowboys against the Steelers. Never again—

“You okay?” Natalie’s voice broke into Matthew’s memories.

Fighting back the hollow ache in his gut, he clenched his teeth. How had he let such depressing thoughts in tonight when he felt alive, truly alive, for the first time since before he’d gotten the call that Robert and Carolyn’s plane had gone down?

“Just got lost in thought.” He flashed a smile that wasn’t as real as he’d like, but there wasn’t enough light that she’d likely be able to tell. “How old do you think I am?”

She glanced his way a few moments, making him wonder if perhaps she saw better in the low light than he’d given her credit for, but she seemed to make the decision not to push. Maybe because she didn’t want to know what he’d really been thinking about.

“Uh-uh.” Her smile was wide, bright, not so over-the-top as to come across as completely fake. “I’m not guessing your age. If I go too high you might be offended. If I go too low, you’ll accuse me of robbing the cradle.”

Her voice was light, but her grip on his hand had tightened, offering a comfort he soaked up and was amazed at how much better her smile and touch left him feeling.

He chuckled. “No chance you robbed the cradle, Natalie. That would be me. I’m probably a good ten years older than you.”

“I seriously doubt it.” She told him her age.

“Eight years older,” he corrected. “I’m the one who robbed the cradle, it seems.”

“Eight years isn’t that much,” she assured. “You’re barely into your forties.”

A memory of his fortieth birthday, spent with Robert and Carolyn, popped into his head. They’d rented out their favorite restaurant’s back room, invited a ton of mutual friends and acquaintances and surprised him with a birthday bash.

“Hey—you okay?” she asked again.

Why had his friends popped back into his head so quickly when he’d just scolded himself for letting them in on a night meant to drown them out?

His gaze cut to Natalie. Why did he find himself wanting to tell her about them?

“You quit walking,” she pointed out. “And you’re squeezing my hand as if you’re afraid if you let go the wind might carry me out to sea.”

Matthew forced his fingers to pry loose from hers, raked them through his hair. “Sorry.”

“That sensitive about your age, huh? I’ll keep that in mind and be sure not to make any more age references.”

Pushing thoughts of his friends from his mind yet again, Matthew shook his head and gave in to Natalie’s teasing. “I’ve no problem with being called an old man.”

“Old man?” Natalie laughed, took his hand back into hers and gave him a little squeeze. “You aren’t an old man. Admittedly, it’s a bit kinky, but I’d be happy to oblige if that’s what you want me to call you.”

His smile was real. “As long as you’re calling me, I won’t complain.”

Her gaze searched his. “For the rest of the weekend, right?”

“Right,” Matthew agreed, but suddenly found it difficult to keep his smile in place. “For the next three days, I’m all yours.”

Then he’d fly back to Memphis, stay at his mother’s for a night, then he and Carrie would drive back to Boston because the little girl was terrified of the thought of getting on a plane, and he hadn’t forced the issue.

Back to trying to figure out life without Robert and Carolyn.

Back to him struggling to raise their precious daughter in a way that wouldn’t disappoint them, which seemed impossible for a sworn bachelor who still couldn’t even put Carrie’s hair up without missing handfuls of it from the bun.

Too bad the position in Memphis hadn’t worked out so his family would be close to shower Carrie in their love and guide him in the right direction as he got this parenting thing all wrong time and again.

What did he know about raising a kid?

Nothing. His friends had been foolish leaving Carrie’s upbringing to him. Robert had known Matthew had no plans to marry or have children. Truly, they couldn’t have chosen a worse guardian for Carrie.

“Your hand is getting tight again,” Natalie warned.

He loosened his hold. “Sorry.”

“Want to talk about whatever keeps bothering you?”

He couldn’t blame Natalie for asking. She’d let it go more than once, but he kept going back to places he didn’t need to let his brain go.

“It’s not important.” Which was a lie. Everything about Robert and Carolyn was important. How he was going to handle fatherhood was important. Part of him wanted to tell Natalie, to spill everything out to her, to tell her what a screw-up step-in parent he’d been so far and that he wished he could give Carrie to a couple who knew what they were doing so the kid wouldn’t turn out messed up. But losing his best friends, and his failed parenthood, weren’t decent conversation for a three-day affair.

For the next three days, he was just Matthew. The dedicated heart surgeon and researcher, the fun-loving man, the devoted short-term lover.

Heart Surgeon To Single Dad

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