Читать книгу This Winter Night - Janice Sims - Страница 11

Chapter 3

“I’ve done it now,” Lauren said jokingly as they lay in bed wrapped in each other’s arms. They’d gotten up and showered together and climbed back in bed.

Colton smiled. “What have you done?”

“I’ve become the Gaines girl who’s not only divorced but who, after the divorce, jumped right in bed with the first available man. I left Raleigh to get away from it all and a hunk shows up on my doorstep.”

“Life isn’t fair,” Colton said sympathetically.

Lauren laughed softly. “Darn right, it’s not. I was determined to give up men.”

He reached out and brushed a tendril of hair behind her left ear. “How long would that have lasted? You’re a vital, passionate woman, Lauren. I can tell that much from the little time we’ve spent together. Don’t let Eckhart turn you off men.”

“Please don’t say that name,” said Lauren.

“All right, I’ll just say ‘the asshole’ from now on,” Colton said.

“Don’t even refer to him at all. I came here to forget he exists.”

“Then why’d you come to a place you shared?”

“He was rarely here,” Lauren explained. “He bought the place and came a couple of times, met your parents who, as you can imagine, gave him a cool reception. Then after a while, he stopped coming at all. I didn’t care. What he didn’t know was that I had an ulterior motive when he announced he was buying the property.”

“Which was?”

“My granddaddy Beck, my mother’s dad, lives up here near the Cherokee reservation. He owns a lodge. I go to see him whenever I come up here. Grandma died about five years ago and he doesn’t have any family in the area. My sisters and I make sure one of us goes to see him at least once a month. I was delighted when my ex bought this place. And, thanks to you, I got it in the divorce settlement.”

“Thanks to me, how?” Colton wondered.

“Because he got no reaction out of you when we moved across the pond from your place, he lost interest and gave it to me without a fight.”

Colton understood. “So when you come up here, it’s like going home.”

“Exactly,” she answered with a contented sigh.

“The only place I’m able to feel that way is my parents’ home,” Colton told her. “I own a home but it’s just a house. A very nice house, mind you, but it has no sentimental value.”

“Maybe you haven’t been in it long enough,” she suggested.

“I bought it six years ago,” he replied. He smiled at her. “You’re an architect. Maybe you can come take a look at it and tell me what’s missing about its design that’s preventing me from caring about it.”

“That implies that we’re going to take this further than this nonreality bubble we’re presently in,” Lauren warned him.

“Is that what you think is happening here?” Colton asked, the humor gone out of his tone and his eyes. Up until now they had been talking good-naturedly. True, her insistence about keeping this a secret had indicated that she believed this was to be a one-night stand, but after making love he no longer wanted it to be just that. He envisioned seeing her again, slowly getting to know her. He had assumed she felt the same way.

“Wasn’t that what we agreed on earlier? That this remains our little secret?”

“Yes, Lauren, but I thought you were thinking of your reputation. I didn’t believe that you were really going to kick me to the curb afterward. Not if we both enjoyed ourselves. And I know you enjoyed yourself.”

“I did enjoy myself,” she confirmed as she freed her arms from his and sat up in bed. “I simply didn’t want to set myself up for disappointment. I wanted you to know that there were no strings.”

“Just pleasure,” he said as he sat up while maintaining eye contact with her. “I understand not wanting to be hurt, Lauren. Believe it or not, I’ve been hurt before, too. On the other hand, I don’t want you to sell yourself short. Of course I want more than a tryst in the mountains.”

“You say that now after sex, but you may feel differently when we get back to Raleigh and to our everyday lives. Plus there’s the trauma you are under due to your father’s death. People do strange things when they’re grieving.”

“And you’re worried that you might have slept with me just to get your ex out of your system, is that it?” he wanted to know.

Lauren shook her head, but her eyes told a different story. She was undecided. “I’m an emotional wreck right now,” she admitted. “I don’t know up from down. I only know that I enjoyed being with you tonight.”

“That’s an honest answer,” he said softly as he pulled her back into his arms.

Lauren smiled again as she got comfortable in his embrace. “Let’s talk about anything except what might happen after we get back to Raleigh. For instance, how old are you?”

“I’ll be thirty-five in October,” he easily replied. “And you?”

“I’ll be thirty next month.”

“How do you feel about that?”

“Same as I felt about twenty-nine—indifferent. I’m not afraid of getting old, I’m just afraid of not accomplishing what I want to in life.”

“Which is?”

“To be happy,” she simply said.

“What would make you happy?”

“To be successful at what I do,” she began. “To have a marriage that is as loving and lasting as my parents’ marriage or your parents’ marriage, for that matter.”

“They did it,” Colton reasoned. “I don’t see why you can’t.”

“The world has changed,” Lauren said. “What was important to our parents’ generation isn’t important to ours. Couples get married today knowing there’s an easy out. Couples from our parents’ generation actually did it believing they were in it for a lifetime.”

“I don’t agree with that,” Colton countered. “I think young people want the same things. We just go about it differently.”

“The odds are stacked against us,” Lauren said. “Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce.”

“Is it that high?” Colton asked incredulously.

“I’m probably quoting old statistics and it’s even higher by now,” Lauren said.

“You’re seeing the world through newly divorced eyes,” Colton told her. “Give yourself a few months and you’ll see things differently. Now, let’s talk Christmas. You know in a matter of minutes, it’s going to be Christmas Day. What do you want for Christmas this year?”

“I didn’t even bother to get the decorations out of the attic,” Lauren said. “I’m not in the Christmas mood this year.”

“Humor me,” Colton insisted with a coaxing smile.

“Peace on Earth, good will toward men?” Lauren ventured.

“Okay, besides that.”

“A warm, sexy man in my bed,” Lauren said, grinning at him.

“I think Santa already gave you that, young lady,” Colton said and kissed her soundly.

When they broke off their kiss, she asked him what he wanted for Christmas, “For a moment like this to last,” was his only reply.

* * *

The next morning Colton awakened before Lauren and took the opportunity to observe her while she slept. He could barely hear her breathing, she slept so deeply. She had braided her hair after they’d made love last night for the final time and now it fell in a single tress down her back. She slept on her side and was literally hugging her pillow. He smiled. She looked so young in repose, nowhere near thirty.

He was still watching her when she opened her eyes and smiled at him. “Is it morning already?”

The sun filtered through the sheers at the window. She squeezed her eyes shut against the glare. “Why didn’t I put up blackout curtains?”

“You obviously like sunshine in the morning,” said Colton as he swung his legs off the bed and stood up. “I have electric shutters in my bedroom that block out everything.”

“What are you, a vampire?” she teased.

“If I were, you would be one by now, as well,” he told her.

He got down on the floor and began doing push-ups without a stitch of clothing on. Lauren sat up in bed to watch. This was the strangest man she’d ever met. She stopped counting at a hundred.

Climbing out of bed, she said, “I’m exhausted just looking at you. The general would love you. I bet he’s out jogging right now.”

“I’d love to meet him,” Colton said.

But she was gone. He heard the bathroom door close as he switched and began the sit-up portion of his morning regimen.

Momentarily, he heard the sound of Lauren brushing her teeth. After a hundred and twenty sit-ups he got to his feet, gathered his clothing that he’d discarded in the heat of passion last night and went to the guest room to shower and dress.

When he emerged a few minutes later, dressed and ready for his day, whatever it might bring, he heard music and followed the sound to the kitchen where Lauren was cracking eggs into a bowl. She looked up. “There you are. The electricity’s back on and the phone’s working again but according to Grandpa who knows the guy who drives the snowplow, the roads won’t be cleared up here until tomorrow morning. I’m sorry.”

Before he said anything, he kissed her good-morning. “Why are you apologizing? You didn’t cause the storm.”

“I thought you might be worried about your mom being alone at a time like this,” she said, concerned.

For a few hours Colton had been able to allow his mind to rest from the constant assault of grief over his dad’s death. Lauren had given him that, and he was grateful to her. But now it all came rushing back. “My sister, Jade, and her family are home from Miami. They’re with her,” he said.

“Oh, that’s good,” said Lauren. She turned back around and resumed cracking eggs. “Scrambled eggs and toast all right with you? I don’t have any breakfast meats. I’m not a big eater of bacon or sausage and I wasn’t expecting guests.”

He smiled gently. “Why don’t you let me cook for you? You cooked for me last night.”

She readily agreed and moved aside to let him take over. He did appear as if he knew his way around the kitchen. He effortlessly whisked the eggs in the bowl and then placed butter in the skillet. At just the right temperature, he added the eggs. He didn’t cook them too long, turning off the stove before they congealed, and when he put them on two separate plates they were of a fluffy consistency.

“Where’d you learn that?” Lauren asked.

“The Riley men are all competent in the kitchen,” he said. “Grandpa Riley was a chef at a restaurant in New Orleans before he got in his head to come to Raleigh and start a construction business.”

“Cooking and building don’t seem to go together,” Lauren said as she put two slices of bread into the toaster.

“They don’t,” Colton agreed. “That’s only a bit of Riley family trivia.”

When the toast was ready, they sat down at the island where Lauren had already put two place settings. She poured orange juice in their glasses. “Coffee?” she asked with the carafe poised over his cup.

“Yes, please,” Colton said, smiling at the domesticity of the scene. It was as if they did this all the time. He was very comfortable in her presence.

A local radio station was on in the background. The announcer reported, “That was the worst snowstorm we’ve had in these parts in years. As our listeners know, we’re used to milder winters.”

Another voice broke in with “Yeah, Bob, let’s hope the temperature doesn’t rise too swiftly because if it does we’re going to have a muddy mess out there.”

“How’d your granddad fare?” Colton asked once music resumed on the radio program.

“He says the lodge is none the worse for wear. That place is built like a fortress,” Lauren said fondly.

“He lives alone?”

“Yes, but his business keeps him so busy he isn’t lonely. Hunters and fishermen stay there year-round. He has a great staff but I’m afraid at eighty, he’s getting a bit old to run the place. I’d never say that to his face because he’d probably bite my head off. He’s never going to willingly retire.”

“He sounds great,” Colton said.

“He is,” Lauren was quick to say. “Our mom, Virginia, is his only child. She’s been trying to get him to move in with her and the general for years but he says if he and the general lived under the same roof, one of them would wind up shot.” She laughed. “He was only slightly exaggerating. He and Daddy don’t get along. He never forgave Daddy for marrying his daughter and taking her all over the world. Daddy’s been stationed quite a few places and Momma followed him. But then she decided she wanted us to have a more permanent home and that’s when they settled on Raleigh. It was a fairly large city and not too far from her father. She got a degree in English and took a job as a teacher and worked her way up to principal. Daddy’s retired now, but she’s still working and like her own father, shows no signs of retiring anytime soon.”

“She sounds like my mom,” Colton said. “Only dad’s illness got her to slow down. She wanted to spend as much time with him as possible toward the end.”

Lauren squeezed his hand in sympathy, but didn’t say anything. She always felt that if you didn’t know what to say to comfort someone it was best to say nothing at all. Just be there for them.

Colton took a deep, trembling breath. “I feel so helpless. I mean, I’m usually the guy people go to when there’s a problem that needs solving. But with this one, I feel totally out of control, unable to cope. It took everything out of me to watch him die in the hospital. Then to see my mother appear to age twenty years right before my eyes after he was gone hit me even harder. Her pain was palpable. I had to get out of there, and I’m sorry to say, I took off. I’ll always regret leaving her alone with my sister.”

“I’m sure they understand.”

“They love me—” he paused “—so they’ll say they understand, but deep down I believe they’ll think I abandoned them.”

“No, no, please believe me, Colton. Everyone responds differently to the death of a loved one. You had to distance yourself for a while. Your family won’t hold that against you.”

“Even now,” he admitted, “I don’t want to go back. I was grateful when you said the roads wouldn’t be clear until tomorrow. There’s the funeral to plan, the casket to pick out, a suit for dad to wear. I should be doing that. I’m his son.”

Since Lauren had known Frank for several years, she felt she could now share with Colton an observation she’d made about his father.

“You’re worrying about insignificant things,” she said. “The Frank Riley I knew and was very fond of didn’t leave matters like his final requests up to chance. He probably left minute details as to exactly how he wanted his memorial service to progress. And even if he didn’t, Veronica certainly has in mind how she wants him to be honored. Couples who’ve been together that long usually have things worked out in advance.”

“You think?” Colton was hopeful that she was right because he was at a loss. A big, strong man like him was completely stumped.

“The phones are working,” Lauren reminded him. “Phone Veronica after breakfast and ask her.”

Colton breathed easier as he finished his breakfast. Lauren had a calming effect on him.

Twenty minutes later he had his mother on the phone.

“Everything’s been arranged for some time now,” Veronica told him. “Your dad left specific instructions. The only thing I haven’t been able to arrange is the New Orleans–style jazz band that’ll play him all the way to the cemetery. His words, not mine. Jade’s on it. You say you’re going to be stuck there another day? Today’s Wednesday. The funeral is on Saturday. That’s plenty of time for you to get back home.”

“I’m so sorry I’m not there with you,” Colton told her sincerely.

“I know you are, baby,” Veronica said with warmth. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’ve always been too hard on yourself. Your father used to wonder if maybe when he was teaching you to run the business he forgot to teach you when to let go. Life isn’t all about making money and living up to everyone else’s expectations. It’s about knowing yourself and knowing when to relax and enjoy the fruits of your labor. You’re thirty-four and you haven’t fallen in love yet. What’s stopping you? Your father and I used to play this game whenever we met a nice young lady. ‘She would be perfect for Colton,’ I would say, and your father would laugh at me and say, ‘Let Colton decide who is perfect for him. Just like I decided you were perfect for me.’ That shut me up for a while, but I still wonder whenever I meet a nice woman whether or not she’s the one for you,” Veronica said with a sigh. Before she said goodbye she reminded him to give her best to Lauren.

Lauren was having her own conversation on the satellite phone as she walked outside on hard-packed snow. Her sister, Amina, a captain in the army who had recently finished a hitch in Afghanistan and was trying to get used to civilian life, was threatening to steal the general’s Hummer and come up there and collect her. “It’s Christmas,” she whined, making Lauren remember when they were kids and Amina, two years younger than herself, began to moan and groan until she wore her down. “No one should be alone on Christmas.”

Lauren told her about Colton’s unexpected arrival last night.

“It was the damnedest thing. I was in the tub at the time.”

Amina screeched with delight on the other end after listening to Lauren’s account. “Desiree says he’s man-candy. And you know she doesn’t say that about just anybody. Is he still there? We’re getting in the car now if he is.”

“No, you’re not,” Lauren said with some satisfaction. “The roads aren’t fit for driving and won’t be until tomorrow.”

“Damn!” Amina said disappointedly.

Apparently, Desiree took the phone from Amina because it was her voice that Lauren heard next. “Colton Riley, huh? Women in Raleigh have been trying to trap him for years. He’s either very wily or a confirmed bachelor. Be careful. You’re very vulnerable right now.”

Desiree was a psychotherapist who specialized in relationships. She had a diagnosis ready for any male her sisters came in contact with. She was so busy solving everyone else’s relationship problems she had no time for a relationship of her own.

“You don’t have to worry. I just offered him a warm place to stay last night,” Lauren said, mindful of the agreement she’d made with Colton. “There’s no relationship here for you to analyze, Desi.”

The next voice to speak belonged to her sister Meghan. “Hey, sis, don’t listen to these two. I hope you’re taking advantage of the isolation and getting to know Mr. Riley better.”

Lauren smiled at the naughty suggestion coming from Meghan. If any of her sisters could be stereotyped as bookish and a bit of a nerd it would be Meghan who was a history professor.

“It’s nothing like that, Meg,” she assured her. “He’s just the son of my neighbors.”

“All right, okay,” said Meghan hastily. “I’m just saying that if you let loose and went for it, you’re way overdue.”

Isn’t that the truth, Lauren thought. Her behavior had been exemplary up until now. She could be forgiven for one indiscretion, couldn’t she?

Amina was in possession of the phone again. “All right, we won’t come up there. But stay in touch and let us know when the roads are clear. We’ve got to go check on Grandpa. He says he’s fine, but he always says that.”

“Will do,” Lauren promised, “Bye, girls.”

She heard them call “Bye!” in unison.

She disconnected and put the phone in the deep pocket of her jacket. Around her the world was snow-covered and looked like a winter scene in a Currier and Ives painting. The pond was frozen over, the tiny dock layered with frost. The oak and pine trees that surrounded the property were snow-laden. They were definitely having a white Christmas.

“Everything okay?” she heard behind her.

Colton had walked out to meet her. She wondered how much of her side of the conversation he’d heard. “Yeah, my sisters threatened to come up here but I told them the roads weren’t clear yet.”

“You have four sisters, right?”

“Yes, but only three, Desiree, Amina and Meghan, are in the area. Petra’s a zoologist studying the Great Apes in Africa.”

“No kidding, like Jane Goodall?”

She smiled. There were many facets to him. “Yes, she’s been there for over two years now.”

“What does she do when she’s not studying apes?”

“Actually, she studied to be a veterinarian and worked at a big city zoo before deciding to specialize and become a zoologist. Now she lectures and has written a couple of successful books on the subject.”

“She sounds very accomplished.”

“Growing up in our household we were all told to aim high. And even if we didn’t hit the mark, we would be giving it our best shot.”

“That’s a good way of looking at things,” Colton said, smiling down at her.

They began walking back to the cabin. “What did Veronica say?” Lauren asked.

“Pretty much what you guessed she’d say,” he answered. “They’ve got it under control. The funeral’s on Saturday.”

“I’ll be there,” she said easily. “Unless you don’t want me...” She hated that now that they’d been intimate she was wondering if her presence at his father’s funeral would make him uncomfortable and perhaps make him relive their time together when he should be focusing on his father. But such were the repercussions of spontaneous sexual relationships. She figured she should expect some awkward moments.

“Please come,” he said. His tone was gentle and sure. “I’d like for you to be there and so would Mom.”