Читать книгу Love On Her Terms - Jennifer Lohmann - Страница 13

CHAPTER FOUR

THE PROBLEM, LEVI realized Sunday morning when he woke up and automatically started opening his blinds, was dark rooms and closed blinds reminded him too much of when Kimmie was feeling at her worst. She would close out the world and couldn’t bear even the little bit of it that Levi would bring home every day when he got back from work. For weeks after her funeral, he’d kept the curtains open 24/7—the neighbors be damned if they saw him drinking coffee naked in the kitchen.

He picked up his pajama bottoms from the floor and pulled them on before padding out to the front door to get his paper. He’d mellowed a bit since Kimmie’s death.

Once back inside, he tossed the paper onto his kitchen table and made himself some coffee before sitting down to the horoscopes. Sometimes he read the rest of the paper, but he always read the horoscopes. Not that the horoscopes ever said anything useful. Once a week—and today was the day—his horoscope told him to embrace a new future. Sometimes he wondered if the astrologer who wrote these simply had a list of generic recommendations for each sign that he or she rotated through.

Kimmie’s horoscope recommended that she go outside and work in the garden. “Start early preparing the beds for your life for the winter,” it said. “The warmth of Mother Nature will provide reassurance in changing times.”

Clearly the writer didn’t know that Kimmie had had a black thumb.

Levi looked up from his paper to the window, noticing that he’d sat facing Mina’s house this morning, not with his back to it like normal. With his blinds open he could see the burst of fall colors her mums provided. Mina, crouched in her front yard, a drill next to her in the grass, was also in full view. She was holding two boards together and screwing down a clamp. When she finished, she picked up a level, held it against the join and shook her head.

He took several sips of his coffee while he watched her undo the work she’d just done and try again. Unsurprisingly, given the uneven surface she was working on, she had to take it apart once more.

He guessed she was making a raised garden bed. The task would be a lot easier if she had some help.

He flipped through the rest of the paper, idly reading the comics—even the terrible soap opera–like ones he should have given up on years ago—and checking the ads. There was nothing worth reading in the rest of the paper, but he skimmed the headlines anyway. For completion’s sake.

Only when he’d finished the paper and his last bit of now cold coffee did he look up again. Mina had apparently gotten the two boards clamped together like she wanted. Now she struggled with holding the boards and predrilling holes for her screws.

Levi sighed. He wasn’t the type of neighbor who liked to do more than wave from his truck when he passed someone on the street. He didn’t want someone interpreting a friendly smile as an invitation to drop by and say hi.

Of course, Mina had already dropped by to introduce herself and before he’d worked himself up to even waving at her from his truck. And, despite helping her with Al, she hadn’t invited herself over for dinner. She’d been friendly but not intrusive.

He sighed again, then stood and put his coffee cup in the sink.

With one last look at his neighbor’s battle against the raised bed, Levi ran his hand through his hair and went upstairs to change into jeans.

She was too young. His heart was still too tender, his memories of Kimmie too fresh. But with no one there to help her, Mina would spend the entire day struggling to produce a garden bed with lopsided joins that would set his teeth on edge every time he stepped out of his front door.

After buttoning his jeans, he dug a work T-shirt out of his drawer. In the long run, going over to help her was a bigger benefit to him than it was to her. Not only did she need the assistance and he had the skills to provide it, but that house had been sitting empty for two years. Helping her fix it up would improve his own house’s value, not to mention what he had to see every time he looked out his windows.

He caught a glimpse of a bullshitting liar in the mirror as his head popped through the neck of the shirt. God, who was he fooling?

In the short bit of time he’d spent with Mina, he had felt more like his old self. The person he’d been before Kimmie’s death, who made plans and had dreams. If he spent more time with her, that man he’d once been would come back, and it was that allure that had him hurrying down the stairs and out the door.

Against his better judgment, he was sure.

* * *

A LARGE, MAN-SHAPED shadow blocked Mina’s view of the marks she’d made in the wood. She sat back on her heels, both in frustration at how long it had taken her to get the stupid boards flush and at the person blocking her view of the part of this process she was really looking forward to—using her new drill.

The shadow didn’t speak, nor did it move. Finally, she turned and looked up into the sun at the man towering over her.

Her sometimes friendly, usually unfriendly neighbor, Levi, had come to watch her be foolish. A better show in person than from the window, no doubt.

“Hey,” she said, throwing a little extra chipper into her voice.

“That’d be easier if you did it on the driveway. Your driveway’s pretty level.” Not much as far as greetings went, but what she could see of his shadowed face was open and friendly. Or as friendly as he got. His now two-day beard and sleep-messed hair didn’t add much welcoming or pleasant to his look, but she’d always preferred brooding to charming.

“I know it would be easier, but if I did this on my driveway, I’d need someone to help me move it once it’s built. And,” she said with a shrug, “I figured it would be easier to get it level on the grass than move it by myself.”

Looking up at him was giving her a crick in her neck. She put her drill down. Much to her surprise, when she looked back up, preparing to stand, his hand was out. She stuck her hand in his, felt a reassuring squeeze and then a pull that was surprisingly gentle considering how quickly she came to her feet.

“Thank you.” She wiped the dirt off her knees.

“Why don’t you have a friend help you?” There was nearly a smile on his face.

A hand and nearly a smile. Even though he hadn’t said a word to her since their trip to the hardware store, Levi wasn’t the cranky neighbor he seemed to so desperately want to be. Under the hair that had fallen down the front of his face again, there might even be a flicker of humor in his eyes.

Spooking him seemed like a possibility, so she didn’t smile back. Or even nearly smile back. “I’ve only lived here a month. No friends yet.”

His brows raised in surprise. “Really? You seem like the kind of person who makes friends in a day. And you’ve been here a whole month.” He said everything but the last word drily, and she wondered if he were making fun of her until she remembered the near twinkle in his eye and the twitch of a smile she might have seen on his face.

“Well,” she corrected herself, “no friends who could help me today. Ivan, the guy I share an office with, is going out of town this weekend. Perry and Susan are at church, and I guess there was a thing after church. And Caroline doesn’t do power tools. When I said I’d use the drill and she only had to hold the boards, she counter-offered with alcohol when I was done.”

She glanced at the boards that were not yet the rectangle she’d thought they would be by now and laughed. “I think I’m going to need at least a beer. Maybe three.”

Levi looked longingly across the two driveways to his house. For a long moment she thought he was going to shrug and walk back into his home. But he blinked, shook his head against some invisible foe and turned back to her. “I’ll help you.”

She didn’t have to wonder if he wanted to. There was no smile on his face and no light in his eyes.

“What makes you qualified?” she asked, more curious than suspicious.

He raised an eyebrow. “I’m a contractor. Normally people pay for my help.”

“Well, I didn’t ask and you don’t have to help me.” Help was help, but begrudging help was almost worse than no help at all. “If I don’t get it done today, Ivan can help me next week. He’s already offered.”

“Yeah, but if I leave you here, I’m going to know you’re struggling, and I’m going to think about it every time I look out a window. I’ll get nothing done.” From his deadpan delivery, she couldn’t tell if he was joking.

“So, really, I’m doing you a favor.” His backward logic brought a smile to her face. “After you help me with this, you’ll owe me a beer.”

Surprise opened his face for a brief second before he barked out a laugh. “Yeah, I guess you could say that.”

“That’s a fair deal.” She stuck out her hand to shake on it. And so she could feel his hand in hers again. Touch him again. Rugged, handsome, and he laughed at her bargaining skills. Suddenly she wanted to start touching him and never stop.

His hand lingered in hers, and with it the possibility of more intimate touches. Though, if that happened, she’d have to tell him about her HIV. And even if he didn’t back away in horror—and most people didn’t—he’d still want her to stop touching him so he could think about what she’d said. That everyone did.

Not that she blamed anyone for needing time to think, but, well, it always ruined the mood.

But Levi was helping her with her raised bed, not slipping his hand around to cup her head and bring her in for a kiss. There was no mood to ruin, only this stupid raised bed that she’d half destroyed in the process of building it.

As they sank down to the grass together, Mina kept her rash decision to build the garden bed at the forefront of her mind. The fact that she’d looked helpless enough for Levi to offer to help was a clear sign that she’d not thought the project through. And she knew better than to rush into things, men included—especially rugged neighbors with an air of tragedy about them. Lack of thinking things through made for bad decisions, and bad decisions made her parents worry. They would suggest she get on the job market again. They would call more. They would question every decision they knew about.

She’d moved to Montana for some independence, not to develop an unsubstantiated crush on a neighbor.