Оглавление
Jennifer Schneider. Always Turned On
AUTHORS’ NOTE
PREFACE
INTRODUCTION. DIGITAL TECHNOLOGY AND OUR EVER-CHANGING WORLD
QUICKENING THE PACE
THE PORNOGRAPHY EXPLOSION
ONLINE SEXUAL EXPLORATION
BACK TO CURRENT REALITY
CHAPTER ONE. SEX, TECH, AND ADDICTION
WHAT IS SEXUAL ADDICTION?
HOW TECHNOLOGY FEEDS SEXUAL ADDICTION
THE LURE OF PORN
THE GREAT PORN DEBATE
EVERYTHING ELSE UNDER THE SUN
THE “TRIPLE-A ENGINE”
BEYOND THE TRIPLE-A ENGINE
Interactivity
HOW DIGITAL TECHNOLOGY ESCALATES PORN ADDICTION
Compactness/Portability
Safety
Online Community (The Good)
Online Community (The Bad)
SEXUAL ADDICTION VS. SEXUAL OFFENDING
ONLINE ADDICTIONS INVOLVE SOME PEOPLE BUT NOT MOST
CHAPTER TWO. PLEASURE SEEKER OR ADDICT? UNDERSTANDING THE DIFFERENCES
THE BRAIN WANTS WHAT THE BRAIN WANTS
CASUAL VS. AT-RISK VS. ADDICTED USER
The Casual Cybersex User
The At-Risk Cybersex User
The Addicted Cybersex User
UNDERSTANDING CYBERSEX ADDICTS
AM I A CYBERSEX ADDICT?
CYBERSEX ADDICTION SCREENING TEST
SEX ADDICTION: IS IT A LEGITIMATE DISORDER?
WHY CAN’T I JUST SAY NO?
OUTWARD MANIFESTATIONS OF ADDICTION
CHAPTER THREE. THE CONSEQUENCES OF SEX GONE AWRY
EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS
RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS
DISRUPTION OF FAMILY LIFE
POOR SELF-CARE
SEXUAL DYSFUNCTION
TROUBLE AT WORK
FINANCIAL ISSUES
LEGAL ISSUES
HOW DO I STOP?
CHAPTER FOUR. SEXUAL ADDICTION: AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY DISORDER FOR WOMEN TOO
WOMEN AND CYBERSEX ADDICTION
WOMEN AND PORN
PORN IS THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG
CHAPTER FIVE. LOVE AND ROMANCE ADDICTION IN THE DIGITAL WORLD
YOUR BRAIN ON LOVE
CHASING THE DRAGON
LOVE ADDICTION SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS
LOVE ADDICTION AND GENDER
TECHNOLOGY DRIVES THE LOVE ADDICTION BUS
CAUGHT WITH A SEX ADDICT
AM I A LOVE ADDICT?
LOVE ADDICTION SELF-TEST
THE NATURE OF ADDICTIVE LOVE
CHAPTER SIX. TO THE CYBERSEX WIDOW AND WIDOWER
SPOTTING SEX ADDICTION IN A SPOUSE OR PARTNER
THE TRAUMA OF REPEATED INFIDELITY
GASLIGHTING MAKES IT WORSE
HOW CAN YOU BE MAD AT ME WHEN IT’S NOT EVEN REAL SEX?
Loss of Trust
Loss of Self-Esteem
Stress and Anxiety Brought on by the Cumulative Effect of Lying/Gaslighting
Diminishment of the Sexual Relationship
IF IT’S A SECRET, THEN IT’S CHEATING
HOW ABOUT MORE SEX AT HOME?
DEALING WITH BETRAYAL
SELF-CARE FOR PARTNERS
CHAPTER SEVEN. KIDS, FAMILY LIFE, AND CYBERSEX ADDICTION
WHEN MOM OR DAD IS AN ADDICT
WHEN KIDS DISCOVER A PARENT’S “STASH”
COMMUNICATING WITH KIDS ABOUT A PARENT’S SEX OR LOVE ADDICTION
KIDS AND CHANGING CULTURAL NORMS
KIDS AND DIGITAL SEXUALITY
BEYOND PORN
SPOTTING SEXUAL ADDICTION IN KIDS
CONSEQUENCES OF SEXUAL ADDICTION IN OUR YOUTH
Other Online Challenges
HOW TO PROTECT YOUR KIDS
HELPING KIDS ALREADY INTO CYBERSEX
CHAPTER EIGHT. FROM DISCONNECTION TO INTIMACY: THE HEALING PROCESS
TAKING STEPS TOWARD HEALING
INTERNET FILTERING AND ACCOUNTABILITY SOFTWARE PROGRAMS
GOING COLD TURKEY
DEFINING AND COMMITTING TO LONG-TERM CHANGE (CYBERSEX SOBRIETY)
TIME OUT
ABOUT MASTURBATION
THE SEXUAL BOUNDARY PLAN
ABOUT WITHDRAWAL
THE GIFTS OF HEALING
CHAPTER NINE. GETTING HELP, GETTING WELL
GETTING INTO THERAPY
LOCATING QUALIFIED THERAPISTS
EVALUATING A POTENTIAL THERAPIST
THERAPEUTIC CHOICES
COUPLES THERAPY
TWELVE STEP SUPPORT GROUPS
TWELVE STEP SUPPORT GROUP Q AND A
FAITH-BASED SUPPORT GROUPS
FINDING HELP OUTSIDE URBAN AREAS
KEYS TO MAINTAINING CHANGE
SLIPS VS. RELAPSE
Warning Signs for Slips and Relapse
CHAPTER TEN. SINGLE PEOPLE AND SEXUAL HEALING: THE DATING CONUNDRUM
ARE YOU READY FOR HEALTHY DATING?
TAKING IT SLOW
BASIC GUIDELINES FOR DATING AND SEX IN RECOVERY
SEXUAL FETISHES, SEXUAL ORIENTATION, SEXUAL IDENTITY, AND SEX ADDICTION
HEALTHY DATING USING DIGITAL TECHNOLOGY
SAFETY FIRST
FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON
CHAPTER ELEVEN. MARRIAGE, LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIPS, AND SEXUAL HEALING: REBUILDING THE BOND
HEALING BROKEN TRUST
ADVICE FOR THE RECOVERING ADDICT
ADVICE FOR THE BETRAYED PARTNER
A FEW WORDS ABOUT RIGOROUS HONESTY
ESCHEWING THE QUICK FIX
EMPATHY
ACTION STEPS FOR RELATIONSHIP SURVIVAL
CHAPTER TWELVE. MOVING BEYOND THE PROBLEM
THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF-NURTURING
NURTURING TASKS FOR THE RECOVERING ADDICT
LAST WORDS
RESOURCES. RESOURCES FOR ADDICTS. SEX AND LOVE ADDICTION RESOURCES. General Information
Sexual Addiction Books
Twelve Step Groups
RESOURCES FOR OTHER ADDICTIONS. General Information
Other Addiction Books
Twelve Step Support Groups
RESOURCES FOR SPOUSES AND FAMILIES OF ADDICTS. General Information
Books for Spouses
Twelve Step Groups
RESOURCES FOR THERAPISTS. General Information
Other Valuable Resources
APPENDIX. ACTIVITY RESOURCES. THE SEXUAL BOUNDARY PLAN
Part One: The Inner Boundary
Part Two: The Middle Boundary
Part Three: The Outer Boundary
SAMPLE BOUNDARY PLAN
GOALS
INNER BOUNDARIES (THE BOTTOM LINE)
MIDDLE BOUNDARIES (WARNING SIGNS)
OUTER BOUNDARIES (HEALTHY HEALING ACTIVITIES)
YOUR SEXUAL BOUNDARY PLAN
MY GOALS (overall guides to my sexual boundary plan)
MY INNER BOUNDARIES (the sexual behaviors I want to stop)
MY MIDDLE BOUNDARIES (warning signs and slippery situations)
MY OUTER BOUNDARIES (positive rewards and ways to maintain my sexual boundaries)
A FEW TIPS ON SEXUAL BOUNDARY PLANS
DEVELOPING A DATING PLAN
Sample Dating Plan
ADVANCED DATING PLANS
RED LIGHTS: END IT NOW!
YELLOW LIGHTS: PROCEED WITH CAUTION
GREEN LIGHTS: MOVE FORWARD
NOTES. PREFACE
INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
OTHER BOOKS BY ROBERT WEISS AND JENNIFER SCHNEIDER
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
