Читать книгу The Motherhood Mix-Up - Jennifer Taylor, Jennifer Taylor - Страница 9

ONCE, JUST BEFORE he had gone off to university, Leo had made a parachute jump. All his friends had been keen to try it and he’d gone along with them. In the event, most of them had chickened out so there’d been just two of them in the plane and he’d been the first to jump. As he had stood in the doorway, watching the ground rushing past below, he had felt his stomach sink with a mixture of excitement and fear. Although he had never jumped again, he remembered the feeling quite clearly. It was exactly how he felt as he waited to meet Mia’s son, scared and elated because he was about to leap into the unknown.

‘There he is.’

Mia touched him on the arm and Leo flinched. He looked over to where she was pointing but he couldn’t pick out one child from another. There seemed to be a sea of small excited faces staring back at him…

Leo’s breath caught as his eyes alighted on a sturdy little boy with dark brown hair standing up in spikes around his head. It had to be Harry; he just knew it was! Even though he would have dismissed the idea that his genes had somehow recognised those of his son if anyone had suggested it, he knew it was true.

Anyway, the boy had his nose as well as his hair. He had his chin too and his cheekbones, he realised in astonishment. In fact, the resemblance was so marked that he couldn’t understand why Mia hadn’t noticed it. Surely she could see how alike they were, he thought as she brought the child over to meet him?

‘Harry, this is Leo. He’s a doctor and he works at the hospital. He very kindly gave me a lift here so I wouldn’t be late.’

Leo had to hand it to her. Even though she must be finding it extremely difficult, there was no hint of uncertainty in her voice as she made the introductions. Her only concern was for her son and his admiration for her increased tenfold, especially when he found himself comparing the way she behaved to the way Amanda would have reacted.

The thought of the scene his ex-wife would have created was very hard to swallow and his mouth thinned with displeasure. Harry took one look at his grim expression and scooted behind his mother’s legs. Leo took a deep breath, cursing himself for allowing thoughts of Amanda to spoil the moment. Amanda had caused enough damage without him allowing her to ruin this too.

‘Hello, Harry. It’s nice to meet you.’ Leo fixed a smile to his mouth but Harry obviously wasn’t convinced it was genuine. He shrank away when Leo held out his hand.

‘He’ll come round,’ Mia said quietly. ‘Just give him a moment.’

She led Harry to the gate, leaving Leo to follow. There were a lot of parents milling about and they soon disappeared from view. Leo experienced a moment of panic as he peered over the crowd because he still had no idea where she lived. Maybe it was selfish but he needed a few more minutes with Harry, a bit more time to get to know his son.

The words seemed to dance in neon-bright letters before his eyes. Harry was his son; he was more certain than ever it was true. But where did that leave Noah? He loved Noah with an intensity he had never believed himself capable of feeling. From the moment he had been handed the wrinkled, bloodied little bundle in the delivery room, he had known that he would lay down his life to protect him. Amanda had got over her longing for a child by then and hadn’t even wanted to look at the miracle they had created, but he had been entranced, thrilled, enthralled.

When Amanda had decided after six months of motherhood that it wasn’t for her, Leo hadn’t argued and he certainly hadn’t tried to stop her leaving. He had never actually loved her but she had been sophisticated and worldly and had suited his requirements, as he had suited hers.

Their parting had been amicable enough and he’d been relieved that he’d been left, both physically and metaphorically, holding the baby. It had meant he could bring up Noah the way he wanted, make sure Noah enjoyed a far happier childhood than he’d had. If only Amanda had stayed away none of this would have happened.

The crowd parted and he spotted Mia and Harry standing by the gates. He hurried to join them, seeing the way the child shrank back as he approached. It grieved him that he had made such a bad impression on the boy and he promised himself that he would do everything possible to rectify it. If he was to be part of Harry’s life he wanted the child to feel comfortable around him.

‘I’ll run you home,’ he said, refusing to dwell on the thought that he might not get the chance to play daddy to his son. It all depended on what Mia decided and as he had no idea what that would be, he couldn’t go counting his proverbial chickens. Unlocking the car, he flipped forward the passenger seat so Harry could climb into the back. It was a tight squeeze and Leo realised not for the first time that he would have to buy something more suitable. Maybe he did love his car but with two children to consider now, it was hardly the most suitable of vehicles.

Mia made sure that Harry’s belt was buckled then slid into the passenger seat. Leo closed the door and went round to the driver’s side. He started the engine then glanced at her, seeing the strain that had etched tiny grooves at the sides of her mouth. His hands clenched on the steering wheel because the urge to reach out and smooth them away was almost too strong to resist. However, he had to resist it, had to resist doing anything that might alienate her.

‘Where to?’ he asked instead, sounding brusque and cold when he had meant to sound warm and approachable for Harry’s benefit.

‘Straight down the road and left at the junction.’

She glanced over her shoulder and smiled at Harry and Leo saw the little boy’s face immediately brighten as he checked the rear-view mirror before pulling out. That there was a deep and loving bond between the pair was obvious and he found himself wishing with all his heart that Noah could have had that sort of a relationship with Amanda. The problem was that Amanda put herself and her needs first every time. Noah came way down her list of priorities, somewhere below the next designer handbag she coveted or the next exotic holiday.

Leo could feel his mouth tightening again and fought to control it. If he was to win Harry round, he not only needed Mia’s co-operation but a major re-think about his own behaviour. He sighed. He had realised from the moment he had discovered that Noah wasn’t his biological child that his life was going to undergo a massive upheaval, but only now did he understand how much he was going to have to change.

‘It’s the house with the red door…just there on the left. Yes, that’s it.’

Mia gathered up her bag, trying to control the urge to leap out of the car. She wasn’t sure why she had agreed to let Leo meet Harry but it had been a mistake. She glanced round, seeing the worry on her son’s face. Although Harry was a happy and loving little boy, like most children his age he hated unexpected changes to his routine. Being ferried home by a stranger, even in such a luxurious vehicle as this, was obviously troubling him.

‘Thank you again for the lift,’ she said politely, turning to Leo. Although she was eager to get Harry into the house, there was no way that she was going to be rude. She summoned a smile when Leo looked at her. ‘I hope we haven’t taken you too far out of your way.’

‘Not at all.’ He shrugged. ‘I live in Primrose Hill so it’s only a short drive from here.’

A short drive maybe, but there was a massive difference in property prices, Mia thought wryly, glancing at the neat little terraced house they were parked in front of. She hurriedly opened the car door, not wanting to go down that route. Continually worrying if Leo intended to use his extensive resources to lay claim to Harry was counterproductive. She got out of the car then turned to unlatch the seat so Harry could get out, frowning when she found herself fumbling with the unfamiliar mechanism.

‘Let me do it.’

Leo gently moved her aside and tipped the seat forward. He offered Harry his hand but the child ignored him. Jumping out of the car, he ran up the path to the house and stood there with his back towards them. Mia sighed softly.

‘Harry hates it when his routine is changed. He prefers it when he knows exactly what is going to happen and when.’

‘It might have helped if I’d made a better impression,’ Leo observed, and Mia frowned when she heard the regret in his voice. He hadn’t struck her as a man who ever regretted his actions; he came across as far too confident for that. However, it appeared she may have been wrong.

It was worrying to think that she might have misjudged him. Mia cleared her throat, not wanting him to guess how unnerved she felt. ‘Children are highly susceptible to people’s moods and Harry has become even more sensitive since Chris died. He was only three when it happened so he didn’t really understand what was going on, but he saw how upset I was and it made a big impression on him.’

‘I see.’ Leo frowned. ‘I didn’t know that you’d lost your husband. I’m very sorry.’

‘Thank you.’ Mia felt a lump come to her throat when she heard the sympathy in his voice. Although she had come to terms with Chris’s death, it touched her that Leo should offer his condolences and mean them too.

‘Was it an accident? He couldn’t have been very old, I imagine.’

‘Indirectly, yes, it was.’ She took a quick breath, knowing that she couldn’t afford to let his response influence her. Until she was sure that she could trust him with regard to Harry, she needed to be objective.

‘Chris was injured in a climbing accident while he was at university. He suffered serious spinal damage and was unable to walk afterwards.’ She shrugged, aware of how hard it was going to be to remain dispassionate. Leo wasn’t the sort of man one could ignore. ‘As you know, being confined to a wheelchair makes people more susceptible to certain conditions and sadly that’s what happened with Chris.’

‘I’m sorry,’ he repeated. ‘It must have been a very difficult time for you.’

Mia inclined her head, deciding it was safer not to pursue the matter. Talking about Chris’s death always upset her and she couldn’t afford to allow her emotions to get the better of her. She quickly changed the subject to one that seemed more fitting.

‘I have the address of a lab that does DNA testing. I’ll collect the samples tonight and post them off first thing tomorrow morning. I should have the results back by the end of the week.’

‘Will there be a problem about providing a sample of your husband’s DNA?’ he queried, frowning.

‘No.’ Mia didn’t elaborate. She didn’t want to explain why she had kept Chris’s hairbrush. It was the last link she had to him, the only thing left of the man who had given her so much; however, there was no way she intended to explain that to Leo. She forced a smile to her lips, hating the fact that she felt so emotional. It wasn’t just thinking about Chris—it was everything else, Harry and Noah and what would happen if it turned out that she and Leo really did have the wrong children.

‘Anyway, I mustn’t keep you. You must be anxious to get home,’ she said, blanking out the thought. Of course she had the right child! Harry was her son and he couldn’t be anyone else’s. As the DNA results would prove. She held out her hand, preferring to end the meeting on a note of formality. ‘Thank you again for driving us home.’

‘It was my pleasure.’

His hand enveloped hers and Mia felt a rush of heat invade her when she felt the strength of his fingers close around hers. She quickly withdrew her hand and hurried up the path. She heard the car start up but she didn’t look round. She didn’t want to think about Leo Forester any more that day. She just wanted to go inside the house and get on with the evening. She and Harry had a set routine and she intended to stick to it—tea, playtime, bath, story, bed. If she stuck to it her life would feel normal but if she deviated in any way then who knew what could happen.

Mia bit her lip. There was one change to their routine she would have to make. She had promised to collect the DNA samples and she couldn’t break her word even if she wanted to. What would happen if the tests proved that Harry wasn’t her son? she wondered sickly. How would she cope with having her whole world torn apart?

Having a child of her own had always been her dream. She had been taken into care when her own mother had been unable to cope with looking after her. Her father had been well off the scene by then. Mia had never met him and didn’t even know his name so she had spent her childhood being shunted from one foster-home to another.

She had longed for someone to love and care for her, but it hadn’t happened. Her mother had refused to allow her to be put up for adoption so Mia had had to make do with temporary placements. Some had been good, others not so good, but the worst thing was that none of them had been permanent.

She had grown up longing for a home and a family of her own, although she had been very choosy about who she had gone out with. She hadn’t intended to make the same mistakes her mother had made and had turned down more dates than she had accepted. She had earned herself a reputation for being very standoffish, in fact, and that in turn had led to the incident that still haunted her.

When the new registrar on the spinal unit where she had worked had invited her out, she had refused at first. Although Steve Parker had seemed pleasant enough, Mia hadn’t been sure if it would be wise to go out with him. Steve was a bit of flirt and she had had no intention of becoming another notch on his bedpost. However, he had persisted and in the end he had worn her down.

They had gone out together several times and Mia had found herself enjoying his company. Steve had been fun and attentive and it had felt good to be on the receiving end of his compliments and feel special. Although she had never slept with a man before, she’d realised that she wanted to sleep with Steve so when he had suggested they should spend the night together, she’d agreed.

It was a complete and utter disaster. Steve was so rough and insensitive, making no allowance for the fact that it was her first time. Mia couldn’t wait for it to be over and left as soon as she could. She tried to write it off to experience but it wasn’t possible, not after she found out that Steve had been spreading stories about her, claiming that she was frigid and that any man foolish enough to get her into bed would regret it. However, the final humiliation came when she learned that he’d also claimed he had only slept with her to win a bet and that he was sorry he had bothered. As he’d put it, it would have been better if he’d forfeited the money!

Mia was mortified and swore she would never allow anything like it to happen again. She never went out on a date after that and might never have seen her dreams come true if Chris hadn’t been admitted to the spinal unit. She nursed him back to health, sat with him while he struggled to come to terms with what had happened, and grew to love him for his humour and his courage. When he asked her to marry him, she accepted immediately, sure that it was the right decision. And when she had Harry, she knew that she had everything she had ever wanted.

Now it appeared that nothing was certain any more. All she knew was that if she lost Harry, her life would be meaningless.

By the time Friday rolled around, Leo felt as though he was walking on a tightrope. Mia had promised that the DNA results would be back by the end of the week and they should arrive that day. His stomach was churning as he made his way to Theatre because the thought of what they would reveal was mind-blowing. If they proved that Harry was his son, what was he going to do?

He scrubbed up, nodding his thanks when the scrub nurse helped him on with his gown. His team was waiting for him, standing silently in Theatre as he preferred them to do. Some surgeons liked to listen to music while they operated but he liked silence, nothing to distract him, nothing to distract them. Heavy metal or classical—it was all the same to him. Noise.

‘How’s the patient?’ he asked Gerry Carter, his anaesthetist. He knew that the theatre staff drew lots to decide who would work with him, the ones who lost being sent in as part of his team. it had never worried him before that he was so unpopular but for some reason he found it irritating that day. Would it hurt them to smile when he came in, to wish him good morning even? Surely he wasn’t that much of an ogre that he not only scared little children but grown men and women as well?

The memory of how Harry had reacted to him had stayed with him and he found himself thinking about it again as the anaesthetist rattled out a summary of their patient’s vital signs. He was going to have to do something about his attitude if he hoped to win the boy round, Leo decided for the umpteenth time. He suddenly realised that Gerry had stopped speaking and was staring at him, obviously expecting a response, although for the life of him, Leo couldn’t imagine what it should be.

‘Sorry. What did you say?’ He gave a short laugh, faintly rusty admittedly but a laugh all the same. ‘It must be my age. I’m finding it difficult to concentrate these days.’

There was a stunned silence before someone gave a little chuckle, hastily turning it into a cough when they realised what they were doing. Leo felt heat flow up his face as he wondered if he’d made a fool of himself and was grateful for the concealing folds of his mask. He concentrated on what Gerry was saying, nodding when the other man came to the end of his spiel.

‘That’s great. Thanks. OK, folks, let’s get to work.’

Leo grimaced as he took his place at the table. Normally, he would have simply set to work without uttering a word, so why had he felt the need to say that? Surely he wasn’t that desperate to improve the image his colleagues had of him? It was Harry he needed to impress, nobody else…except Mia.

Finding out that her husband had died in such tragic circumstances had affected him far more than he would have expected. He had found himself thinking about it all week, imagining how difficult the past few years must have been for her. He had also found it hard to come to terms with the fact that her husband had been wheelchair-bound. Although he knew it had nothing to do with him, he couldn’t help speculating about their relationship. Had Mia undergone IVF treatment because she and her husband had been unable to make love?

He swiftly erased that thought. He needed to concentrate and he couldn’t do that if he was thinking about issues that didn’t concern him. the patient, Hilary Johnson, was undergoing surgery to replace her aortic valve. Leo made the first incision through the sternum then Hilary was placed on a heart-lung machine and her heart was stopped. It was an operation that was only carried out in extreme cases, when a patient was suffering life-threatening symptoms, but he had performed it many times before and worked swiftly, excising the damaged valve and replacing it with a prosthesis. He waited while the woman was removed from the machine, preferring to check for any problems before closing up. He nodded when everything appeared to be functioning normally.

‘That all seems fine. Dr Halshaw, perhaps you would like to close up? It will be excellent practice for you.’

He moved aside so that his registrar could step up to the table, ignoring the startled looks that were being exchanged. He rarely invited his juniors to take part so it was a bit of a red-letter day, but maybe it was time he made some changes in work too. After all, the younger doctors were never going to progress if they didn’t get any hands-on experience, were they?

‘Good. You’ve made quite a decent job of that,’ he said when the younger man had finished. He glanced around, rather enjoying the fact that everyone appeared slightly stunned to hear him praise one of their number. A sudden and wholly unfamiliar sense of mischief spurred him on. ‘Thank you, everyone, in fact. You all did extremely well today.’

Leo exited Theatre, smiling to himself when he heard a babble of conversation break out as the doors swung to. Maybe it was time he tried a different approach if it stopped people becoming complacent. It would keep them on their toes if they weren’t sure how he was going to react.

He showered and changed, then went to the consultants’ lounge to write up his notes. Although one of the juniors would type them up later, he preferred to outline the procedure while it was fresh in his mind. He had almost finished when there was a knock on the door.

‘Come,’ he called, without glancing up from the screen. He saved the file before he looked up, feeling his heart give an almighty leap when he saw Mia standing in the doorway. She had an envelope in her hands and he knew—he just knew!—it contained the results of the DNA tests.

Leo rose to his feet, his head swimming as thoughts rushed through it. He wasn’t ready for this! He didn’t want to hear what she had to say, didn’t want to know if Harry was his real son. He loved Noah and he didn’t want any other child to supplant him.

‘I have the results of the DNA tests.’

Her voice was so calm that it cut through all the turmoil in his head. Leo nodded abruptly. ‘And?’

‘I haven’t opened it yet.’ She showed him the envelope with its seal still intact. ‘I thought it best if we read it together. That way there will be no mistake.’

Meaning that he wouldn’t be able to accuse her of skewing the results, he thought wryly, although he couldn’t blame her for being cautious. Whatever they discovered, it was going to have far-reaching consequences for all of them—him, her and the two boys.

‘Right. Do you want me to open it?’ he offered, but she shook her head.

‘I’ll do it.’ She slid her finger under the flap and ripped it open. Taking out the single sheet of paper it contained, she read what it said before handing it to him.

Leo glanced sharply at her but he couldn’t discern anything from her expression. He took a quick breath then looked at the paper, although the words seemed to dance before his eyes. He, a man who read reports far more complicated than this every day of his life, couldn’t make sense of it!