Читать книгу Ain't No Way - Jerry Milam - Страница 8

Chapter Two

Explain Please

As the smell of coffee and breakfast filled the air, John and Barney swapped stories. Each story got more and more outlandish. Bernie could not relate to any of the stories and wondered why two grown men would lie to each other. So he decided to check his wares in his wagon. He figured just because it was his honeymoon, it did not necessarily mean that he could not sell some of his goods, if the occasion occurred.

Matt sat nearby so he could hear the tales but did not wish to participate. Luke, on the other hand, wanted to join in on the conversation but had nothing to say. Every once in a while, when there was a lull in the stories, Luke would blurt out, “Ain’t no way.”

“John,” Barney started asking, “I don’t mean to be nosy, but what in the daylights are you doing out here? This is a rough country for even the roughest and bravest of men, much less the likes of delicate women.”

“Barney T., I’ll have you know that I can match wits with any man, and strength with the most of them,” retorted Martha. “But I do appreciate the compliment of my delicacy. Seems some men do remember that I am a woman and not a servant nor a mule.” She shot a hard stare in the direction of her husband before continuing her conversation with Barney. “But before we answer that, you explain please.”

“My dear lady, whatever are you referring to?” Barney asked innocently, trying his best not to show the smile that was now entering his facial features.

“You know dad gum good and well what I’m talking about,” Martha replied. “That shot of yours that cost me two of my much-needed years of my life.”

“Oh, that.”

“Yes, oh, that,” repeated Martha. “But this time, no tall tales or big whoppers, you hear?”

“Yes, um, I reckon I do.”

“And none of that dumb hillbilly act neither,” Martha scolded. “Life aren’t going to fall for that, are we, gang?”

Smiling eyes and shaking heads flowed around the campfire and one demonstrative “Ain’t no way” from Luke, which meant that he did not have a clue to what she was talking about.

“Okay, okay,” Barney surrendered. “I had noticed that your fire was getting low, so I figured that whoever was on guard duty, if anyone, had fallen asleep, so to keep from startling anyone and maybe getting shot, I walked back up the canyon a ways and fired my gun in the air. I knew that the sound would echo, and by the time I returned to the camp, everyone would be aroused and fully awake.” Hard looks came from nearly everyone in camp but John and Luke. Luke looked bewildered, while John’s face was a cross between understanding, admiration, and guilt. Yes, it was John who had fallen asleep on guard duty.

“John, how could you fall asleep on duty while so many lives were in your hands?” scoffed Bernie Douglas.

“Ain’t no way!” shouted Luke.

“Yes, there was a way,” John admitted. “And you are quite right, Mr. Douglas, I made a very bad mistake. Luckily we were all unharmed this time.”

“Well, I hope you—” started Mr. Douglas.

“Honest mistake. Honest humans make honest mistakes,” Matt mumbled as he put up the stick that he was whittling on and meandered off toward the horses. Bernie Douglas pouted as the rest of the group only grinned.

“Well, that’s a human error that I hope will never happen again,” remarked John as a small whimpering yelp came from the unhuman who was lying near Barney T. John reached over to pet Do-What and said, “You too, uh, boy?”