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ОглавлениеSEX, LIES & CRAZY PEOPLE
A True Story
John Hickman
COPYRIGHT
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Printed in Australia by In House Publishing
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Dewey Number: 305.310941
Distribution to the book trade throughout Australia & New Zealand by
Dennis Jones & Associates Pty Ltd.
Cover design by In House Publishing www.inhousepublishing.com.au
Cover design by In House Publishing www.inhousepublishing.com.au
Metadata, manuscript formatting, templates and photograph enhancement by
In House Publishing www.inhousepublishing.com.au
ISBN: 978-0-9870945-7-5 (soft cover)
ISBN: 978-0-9870945-8-2 (hard cover)
ISBN: 978-0-9870945-9-9 (eBook)
ISBN: 978-1-3107543-9-5 (Smashwords edition)
CONTENTS
Dedication
Historical Accuracy
Acknowledgements
Chapter 1Fact or Fantasy-1965
Chapter 2Ace or Joker?
Chapter 3Dad’s simple plan
Chapter 4The Agreement
Chapter 5Beau Nash
Chapter 6Harewood Hotel
Chapter 7Dad’s plan B
Chapter 8Room Thirteen
Chapter 9Bogged down – S.O.S
Chapter 10Hitting the fan
Chapter 11On the prowl
Chapter 12Wild oats
Chapter 13Paradise!
Chapter 14Eliza
Chapter 15One step forward – two back!
Chapter 16Less square footage
Chapter 17The love zone
Chapter 18In limbo
Chapter 19Kentucky what?
Chapter 20Three old crones
Chapter 21Revenge, a dish best served…
Chapter 22Kathy
Chapter 23Uncorked
Chapter 24Frau Doodlebug
Chapter 25Wendy
Chapter 26Cupids arrow
Chapter 27Better luck next time!
Chapter 28My Aphrodite
Chapter 29Vings
Chapter 30A kitchen skirmish
Chapter 31Our jail bird
Chapter 32Warriors true
Chapter 33Three stars you say…
Chapter 34Si’l vous plait expliquer! Or please explain
Chapter 35Pros & Cons
Chapter 36Jacob’s wisdom
Chapter 37Menus my arse
Chapter 38Chef Johnny Boy
Chapter 39Tag…you’re it
Chapter 40Modern chef
Chapter 41Le Chef
Chapter 42Christmas humbug
Chapter 43Manyana
Chapter 44Calling last bets
Chapter 45Roy Rogers
Chapter 46Easy money
Chapter 47same shit, different day
Chapter 48Pet shop man–Steve
Chapter 49Charlie
Chapter 50Handbag, boots, or belt?
Chapter 51Lofty
Chapter 52The sting
Chapter 53Three bears
Chapter 54Bona fide
Chapter 55Shenanigans
Chapter 56Agent provocateurs
Chapter 57Farwell fair maiden
Chapter 58Lost love
Chapter 59Three monkeys
Chapter 60Bar’s open
Chapter 61Understanding women
Chapter 62Two weddings
Chapter 63Replacing Charlie
Chapter 64Vhat’s mein ist mein
Chapter 65Three cheers for Germany
Chapter 66Kangaroo man
Chapter 67Racist…?
Chapter 68Milestones
Chapter 69Each to their own…
Chapter 70Our German
Chapter 71High jinks
Chapter 72The roster crisis
Chapter 73Our new arrival
Chapter 74Chinese food
Chapter 75Torpedoed
Chapter 76Knickers!
Chapter 77Scientologists
Chapter 78One of them!
Chapter 79Grasping at straws
Chapter 80Lisa with an ‘s’ not a ‘z’
Chapter 81Lois Lane
Chapter 82The departure
Chapter 83Barbarians at the gate!
Chapter 84Blindsided
Chapter 85Sins of the father
Chapter 86Positive thinking
Chapter 87Disasterville
Chapter 88No plan B
Chapter 89Kryptonite
Chapter 90Lower than low
Chapter 91Being punished
Chapter 92Not feeling the love
Chapter 93Another tragedy
Chapter 94Needing a job
Chapter 95Surviving the Harewood Hotel
Chapter 96Working on instinct
Chapter 97Out of the woods
Epilogue
Photos
About the author
Notes to the reader
Books by the same author
DEDICATION
To everyone who has read Tripping Over and contacted me asking, “What happened
after you found a hotel your Dad could buy—without any money?”
To Carole, my wife of 50 years, who says being with me, was nothing like she expected, but has been interesting. Thank you for always being there for me as my closest friend and
confidant. You were my guiding light through those dark times, when we went backwards financially - but in sunshine.
To Sara and Mark, our children, all my love to you forever. Thank you for your belief in me.
HISTORICAL ACCURACY
As author it has been my choice to write under my own name. Other names have been changed out of consideration for relatives I have been unable to contact. The writer acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of narrative non-fiction, which have been used without permission.
The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorised, associated with,
or sponsored by the trademark owners.
To the best of the author’s intentions this work is a faithful rendering of the facts as remembered by him.
As stated, SEX, LIES & CRAZY PEOPLE is a work of narrative/creative non-fiction. This is a true story as remembered by the author and by his family; Dad, Gran, Gramps, Pandy, and Carole.
I have had remarkable clarity with most of the story. Where memory has failed or a gap has been discovered of which I was unaware, the tone has been recreated with the
general content for dramatic flow.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
My story is neither the beginning nor the end but somewhere in between.
It happened in some places I would rather forget, but like the phantom itch from a long ago amputated limb, it remains.
People who contributed to this book have had to wait a long time to see it appear.
Sadly, for some it has taken too long. Many have died before publication. The author hopes he has done their memories justice. We live a while only to die sooner than we planned.
Carole, my wife, is appreciated as always for her patience in tolerating what has become my obsession. She has been a model of calm and reassurance with her recall of our family folklore. She knew my dad, Bill, for more than thirty years.
To our daughter Sara Jayne, it was your artistic genius that led me to complete my book. Your contribution benefited me in so many ways. Our journey together with Sex, Lies & Crazy People became my greatest pleasure, and your insights saved another tottering sequel. Together I’d like to think we put the fun back into being dysfunctional. Thank you, Sara.
My story editor, the irreplaceable Tricia Eban, who gave her time unselfishly, kept me focused and never gave up on me. Tricia prevented my story from becoming a boring diary of events and toilet humour jokes Her many valuable suggestions and changes allowed my voice to come through.
Sincere posthumous thanks to Gran, who encouraged me to write with my first
Remington portable typewriter. Presented on my tenth birthday, it was an expensive gift in 1955 at £6 from Whiteleys department store, Bayswater, London.
John McMaster, good friend and literary mentor gave many valuable suggestions and clever, intuitive input, which has improved the telling of my story.
To my fellow scribes at Palm Lake Resort Writers’ Circle who have put up with my
obsession over the years; you know who you are – thank you.
And to the unique In House Publishing Team;
Ocean Reeve; In House Manager and head consultant made the management of my
processes enjoyable from our first meeting to the published book. He has a natural flair, which comes from his love of what he does.
Linda Daniel; In House Editor proved honest and sincere. Her integrity throughout stayed true. Consistent and fair she easily brought the best out of details I’d missed.
Kevin Palmer; In House head designer, take a bow for hitting the nail on the head (apologies for the cliché) with the design of the cover. You’re a genius.
Dylan Maybury; Ocean’s In House prodigy and sponge who absorbs everything and anything and creates new branches from the tree that is In House Publishing. This multi-tasker extraordinaire missed nothing and is to accompany me on our marketing journey.
Guy Kirk; In House IT legend and ultimate In House hole-filler. Guy covers all bases and takes immense satisfaction with building my online presence and eBooks.
Acknowledgement of photographs:
Sara Jayne Hickman
Carole Hickman
John Hickman
Pamela (Pandy) Twinning
Logan Shire Council
Queensland Newspapers
The other photographs are attributed to unknown photographers.
Other sources:
News of the World
Daily Mirror
Daily Telegraph
The Times
Daily Express
Wikipedia
L. Ron Hubbard
John Hickman 2014
