Читать книгу From Eden and Back: The Incredible Misadventures of Billy Barker - John Randolph Price - Страница 7

As they were floating on the barnacled plank toward the small island in the Caribbean, the two men introduced themselves, and Ned Piffle said, "Don't worry, son, we're going to make it. Life has its ups and downs and ins and outs, but the key is to go along for the ride until the dice roll craps."

Billy had a sudden urge to tell Rancher Piffle his life story, including all that had happened since he ran from the Doobie estate. And he did. By the time he had finished telling the story, they had reached land, a powdery white sandy beach with palm trees filled with coconuts.

They rested on the beach for a time in silence. Finally Piffle said, "Well, son, let me tell you about me." And for the next hour he told Billy about being gored by a bull with he was five, trampled in a stampede at age twelve, his girl friend falling into a well on their third date and drowning, his father and mother being killed by rustlers, and how he had built a good life on the losses and crosses of the toil and pain of adversity. "That's all a part of life, son. We win some, we lose some, but somehow it all balances out in the end."

Billy stood and stretched, his wet clothes quickly drying in the hot sun, his hair neatly blow-dried by the warm breeze. "Then you feel that everything is for the best."

The rancher unzipped his pants and urinated on the white sand. "Oh, I don't know about that. I just know that life is what we make it, kind of like walking through a jungle. You might step in quicksand, get bitten by a snake, chased by a tiger, or hit by a poisonous dart from a native's blowgun. On the other hand, you might just dance through the thick green foliage and come out completely unscathed. The difference is the luck of the draw on that particular day."

"What part does God play in all this?" Billy asked while eyeing coconuts in the tree above.

"Well, the way I figure it, God did his thing when he created us, then went off somewhere else to see if he could do a better job. It's like we're on our own and may the best man win."

Billy thought for a moment as he climbed the tree to fetch coconuts, then said, "So you do not feel that God has condemned us to eternal punishment."

"Hell no," the rancher said. "God said, in effect, get out of my face and go do your own thing. It was more a divorce decree rather than a sentence, and that's why we don't have to worry about any interference from him. We're free to do it our way, and if we goof it up, well, we live in our own dung until we draw a better card. No big deal. It's all according to the law of averages. Win some, lose some."

Billy slammed two coconuts together cracking both. He handed one to Ned Piffle and said, "What you are saying is so beautiful! You have given me a completely new understanding. Truly, Rancher Piffle, there is nothing to fear from the Almighty for all of life is based on statistics, a branch of mathematics that analyzes numerical data and draws conclusions from them. We define the problem by asking why certain things happen to people, and in the analysis of the data we find that it is all based on frequency distribution of patterns relating to probabilities. For example, the probability of my beloved Lillie being ravished and killed by a band of ruffians was, let's say, fifty percent with a three percent margin of error."

The old rancher took a bite of the coconut meat and looked at Billy with squinted eyes. "Son, that's just another way of saying that bad things happen to good people just because it was time for it to happen."

"Yes," Billy said, "and since God doesn't do it there's no reason for religion in a statistically-correct world. Everything doesn't happen for the best or the worst. It just happens because that's the way the universe is constructed. Oh how freeing, how exciting. My faith is now in mathematical probabilities and not in a vengeful God, and I will learn to be the best of all possible gamblers."

"Now you're talking," Ned said as he finished his coconut and tossed it into the water. "Come on, let's go see if we can find any semblance of civilization on this island."