Читать книгу The Tempting Of The Governess - Julia Justiss - Страница 14

Late that afternoon, Olivia settled her two tired charges back in the nursery to rest before dinner. She’d just gone to her own room to tidy up when Mansfield knocked at her door and informed her that the Colonel wished to see her at once.

Sighing, Olivia nodded. ‘Inform him that I shall be down directly.’

Most likely, after their acrimonious exchange this morning, her irate employer intended to formally discharge her. When, as furiously angry as she could ever remember being, she’d stalked from Colonel Glendenning’s library that morning, she’d been single-mindedly focused on providing for the children the warm blankets and clothing the caretakers of Somers Abbey were unprepared to furnish. Once that task was performed, she had resolved to resign—if the Colonel didn’t discharge her first.

But over the course of the day, her anger had cooled and her compassion kindled. Who would look after brave little Elizabeth and silent Sophie, who had yet to speak a word to her, if she left Somers Abbey?

Knowing how they were situated, she couldn’t just walk away—not until the Colonel found some kind female relation to take over their care—someone who showed a willingness to actually care for them.

So, as little stomach as she had for the idea, she was going to have to apologise to the Colonel. In terms humble and contrite enough to persuade him to keep her on.

She would have to be—how had he described the governesses in India?—meek and retiring.

If she kept before her the vision of the fear in little Sophie’s face when Mrs Wallace had looked at her accusingly this morning, maybe she wouldn’t gag on the words.

Her face washed and her hair and gown straightened, Olivia took a deep breath and took herself to the library.

Looking stern and contained, but much better than he had in the early morning light, when he’d been unshaven, bleary-eyed and obviously the worse for a night of hard drinking, the Colonel nodded to her as she entered. ‘Take a chair, please, Miss Overton.’

He wanted her to sit? Perhaps he intended to berate her at length before dismissing her. Wanting to head him off, Olivia said, ‘I’d rather stand, sir, if you don’t mind.’

Quirking his lip, the Colonel shook his head. ‘Are you always contrary?’

Belatedly realising she’d once again failed to be an obedient servant, Olivia said hastily, ‘Sorry, sir. I don’t mean to be.’

‘I don’t suppose you do. However, I’d like to inform you—’

‘Please, Colonel, if I might speak first?’ Without waiting for permission, she rushed on. ‘I... I must apologise for my conduct this morning. It was not my place to criticise the way you are discharging the responsibilities you generously agreed to shoulder in the raising of your cousin’s children, especially when you are already burdened with the heavy task of restoring your own estate, and have no wife or sister to assist you with their care. I let my...distress over their situation lead me into being much too impetuous and outspoken. I hope you will forgive me and let me begin again anew.’ Not at all sure she could make good on the promise, she made herself add, ‘It will not happen again.’

For a moment he stared at her unsmilingly. ‘Are you sure?’

Innate honesty warred with her determination to remain the girls’ protector. ‘I shall do my utmost to prevent it,’ she said at last.

She thought she saw the tiniest hint of a smile on his face. But surely she was mistaken, for he said, ‘I understand you were...impetuous and outspoken with my head groom this morning. Commandeering a vehicle? Taking the girls with you to Bristol?’

She swallowed hard. ‘Yes, sir. Since...since you referred me to Mrs Wallace to obtain necessities for the girls, necessities she had already refused to provide, I felt compelled to go to the city and buy them myself. As the day was warm and fair and the girls have seldom been allowed to leave the nursery, I decided to take them with me. After all, how can they come to love their homeland if all they know of it is a rainy field seen from the nursery window? And you had not given any orders that the children and I were specifically forbidden to venture away from Somers Abbey.’

‘No, I had not expressly forbidden it, Miss Overton. But I am not in the habit of having those in my care taken away without my knowledge. Nor did you think to take a groom along to protect them, should anything have happened on the road.’

‘I... I know the house is short-staffed, sir. I didn’t want to pull any of the other servants from their tasks. I can manage a team quite competently, the road is well travelled and, in broad daylight, I didn’t expect to encounter any malcontent who couldn’t, if necessary, be discouraged by the use of my driving whip.’

‘Deciding and managing once again, Miss Overton?’

Her cheeks heating, her eyes flew up to meet his gaze. It was for their good! she wanted to insist. But rather than voice the protest hovering on her lips, she made herself lower her eyes and say, in the most penitent tones she could manage, ‘Yes, I suppose I was. I’m sorry, sir.’

‘And you promise not to do that again, either?’

Eating humble pie was harder than she’d imagined. Keeping the image of Sophie’s face firmly in mind, she said, ‘I will earnestly try not to, Colonel.’

She heard something that sounded like a choked laugh. Surprised, she looked up—to find the Colonel chuckling.

She wasn’t sure what was more shocking—his sudden mirth, or how the smile made his blue eyes sparkle and transformed his stern features into something unexpectedly appealing—and undeniably handsome.

She was still trying to make sense of those startling observations when he said, ‘I’ve tortured you enough, Miss Overton. I can only imagine how difficult it was for you to hold your tongue and abase yourself to apologise, especially knowing you were right.’

‘I—I was right?’ she repeated, caught off guard.

‘Yes. Actually, I’d summoned you here so that I might apologise to you. I am not normally so churlish, but you caught me with the devil’s own headache—and, yes, I’d indulged far too much, so you needn’t add that scold.’

Then, as understanding dawned, she said indignantly, ‘You were going to apologise to me? And yet you led me on...’

‘True.’ He nodded. ‘It wasn’t well done of me, but I think we both have a...managing bent. As I know only too well, it isn’t easy for a person of that nature to apologise—especially when one knows one was in the right. I’m afraid I couldn’t resist encouraging you to go through with it. You were hoping a display of penitence would dissuade me from firing you, I suppose. Because you felt you must stay on and protect the girls from their evil, uncaring guardian.’

‘Not evil. But you did seem rather...uncaring.’

Some sort of anguish briefly crossed his face, gone before she could even be sure she’d actually seen it. ‘I shall have to do better. Once I’d calmed down after our confrontation—and some strong coffee and beefsteak had made me feel human again—I went up to the nursery and found it just as you described. I don’t recall what was on the beds when my brother and I were boys, but those threadbare cotton rags wouldn’t warm a flea. Somers Abbey’s finances may still be recovering, but we can certainly stand the cost of clothing and blankets, and so I informed Mrs Wallace.’

She must have grimaced, for the Colonel nodded. ‘Dreadful woman. I try to have as little to do with her as possible.’

‘Would that I might!’ Olivia said feelingly.

The Colonel frowned. ‘Do you fear she will try to exact retribution for your having come to me after she refused your requests?’

Now that she knew she had her employer’s support, Olivia was quite sure of holding her own. ‘I can deal with Mrs Wallace.’

He smiled slightly and once again she was caught unawares by the strength of his sheer masculine appeal. Goodness, what a transformation when he smiled! He should do it much more often.

‘I’m sure you can, my Managing Miss Overton,’ he was saying. ‘But if she does give you any trouble, you are to inform me. Also if she baulks at providing any other supplies you feel the girls need.’

‘If she is so unpleasant, why do you not discharge her?’ Olivia asked—and then remembered that, as an employee, she had no business asking such a question.

Instead of putting her in her place, though, the Colonel sighed. ‘After reducing the staff to a skeleton level and spending most of my time away from the house, I had to leave someone in charge. Why my brother hired the woman, I have no idea. Once things are in better order and finances improve, I intend to replace her.’

‘Providing her with a good character so you may pass your problem along to another household?’

‘You are impertinent, you know,’ he said, giving her a reproving glance.

‘I, too, have managed a household,’ she reminded him. ‘To be charitable, perhaps she would be happier in a larger household with more staff to manage.’

‘And to underscore her importance,’ the Colonel said.

‘Precisely.’

To her surprise, the Colonel chuckled again. ‘I should like to have been a fly on the stable wall when you commandeered that pony cart. What exactly did you say to John Coachman?’

Feeling a little embarrassed, she confessed, ‘I used my “Mistress of the Household” voice and simply ordered him to prepare it.’

‘Ah, yes. Behaving as if one has the authority to command something generally gets results—whether or not one actually has that authority.’

‘To be fair, he was hesitant at first. But a governess does have charge of the children, and once I demonstrated my driving ability, he was content to see us go.’ She smiled. ‘He probably reasoned that, if anything untoward transpired, since he’d not had orders to refuse me, I would mostly likely bear the blame of it.’

‘I imagine he did.’ The Colonel shook his head. ‘You are the most insubordinate subordinate I’ve ever encountered.’

‘Well, sir, you may be a colonel, but this is not the army and I am not your corporal.’

‘What are you then, I wonder?’

She looked at him...and something flashed between them. An odd sense of being kindred spirits, underlain with a strong physical attraction that sent a wave of warmth through her. The feeling of connection was gone almost before she was aware of it, but the simmering heat remained, exciting, energising...and dangerous.

Before she could pull her shaken senses together, he looked away. ‘We still have the matter of your purchases,’ he said, all business again. ‘By the way, how did you pay for them? Petty larceny from the household funds?’

‘Certainly not. Besides, I wouldn’t be surprised if Mrs Wallace carried the precious “household funds” around on her person. I used my own funds.’

The Colonel cocked his head at her. ‘Have I paid you anything yet?’

‘No, sir. I... I have a small amount of my own laid by.’

‘Then I shall see you reimbursed at once. Can’t have you drawing down your pin money buying necessities for the children.’

Her light mood faded as she recalled just how little money she had left. ‘No, that would not be wise.’

‘Very well. What was the total?’

After naming the sum, she tried to rally her suddenly sagging spirits. After all, she wasn’t going to be discharged, she would have important work to do, making her charges feel comfortable in their new home—and maybe, if the Colonel really wanted to do better by them, she might figure out a way to coax him to interact more with them.

The orphaned girls so desperately needed a permanent, protective presence in their lives. She could only sympathise, as she yearned for one, too—but at least she had Sara in London to turn to, should matters become truly dire.

After counting out what he owed her, the Colonel closed the desk drawer. ‘Very well, Miss Overton. You will let me know if you encounter any difficulties with Mrs Wallace—or if you feel the girls are in need of anything else.’

Might as well start now. ‘There is...one more thing. You are their last remaining close relation, you told me. I’m sure they would adjust more quickly, feel less frightened, lost and alone, if they could get to know you better.’

Immediately, that forbidding look came over his face, the same look she’d noticed before when she’d mentioned him seeing more of the children. ‘As I believe I already told you,’ he said, his tone noticeably cooler, ‘I’m busy and away from the house on estate business all day, almost every day.’

‘Do you know what Elizabeth said to me in Bristol? What convinced me I would have to apologise and try to retain my position?’

The increasing grimness of his expression warned she was once again risking an abrupt dismissal. Too certain he needed to hear the child’s comment to back down, she met his gaze unflinchingly.

For another fraught moment, she thought he meant to tell her he had no interest in childish confidences and send her away. Instead, with a wry grimace, he said, ‘I suppose you are going to tell me, whether I want to hear it or not.’

After biting her tongue to keep herself from responding to that provocation, she said, ‘Once we had made our purchases and were preparing to leave town, Elizabeth asked if I would be taking them back to Somers Abbey—or if I was going to leave them in Bristol with someone else. Please, Colonel, if you could just let me bring them in to see you occasionally, so they might start to feel they can rely on you and be reassured that you won’t simply pass them along to—’

‘Enough, Miss Overton,’ he interrupted, a sharp look of—surely it wasn’t pain?—crossing his face. Standing abruptly, he walked to the bookcase and halted there, his back to her. Though she ached to say more, she made herself remain silent and waited.

Finally, he turned back to her, his expression tightly controlled. ‘I will do as much as I can. I rely on you to reassure them.’

She knew better than to press him further. At least he hadn’t ordered her out of the room this time. ‘Very well. Thank you, Colonel.’

‘No, thank you, Miss Overton. For helping me “discharge my responsibilities”.’

So he did feel he should do more for them. She had the grace to feel a little ashamed at pushing him so hard. ‘That was unfair. I am sure you are quite capable.’

He sighed. ‘This time, I sincerely hope to be.’

With that enigmatic utterance, he nodded a dismissal. Giving him a curtsy, she left the room.

Late that night, Olivia tiptoed into the quiet nursery to check on the girls. As she’d hoped, her two charges slept peacefully, their small bodies covered from head to toe in thick flannel nightgowns and tucked in under heavy woollen blankets.

She smiled, remembering Elizabeth’s awe when she’d first donned the nightgown. ‘Oh, miss, it’s so soft!’ she cried, rubbing her small hands down the material. ‘Sophie, we shall finally be warm!’ Giggling, she’d hugged her little sister, then looked back to Olivia. ‘Thank you so much, Miss Overton!’

‘I may coax you into liking England after all,’ she’d said, then settled them into bed and told them a story—having discovered, when she’d given the schoolroom a closer inspection that evening, that its cupboards contained neither toys, nor slates for writing, nor books she could read to them.

Predictably, when she’d asked Mrs Wallace about it, the woman had replied icily that until last week, the schoolroom at Somers Abbey had been unoccupied for the whole of her tenure as housekeeper, so she had no idea if the household possessed such items. ‘Since you have such good rapport with Colonel Glendenning, perhaps you should ask him,’ she’d said snidely, obviously not at all happy that Olivia’s earlier talk with the master hadn’t resulted in the rebuke the housekeeper had expected.

Biting back the reply she would like to have given, Olivia hung on to her temper. Much as she’d like to give as good as she got with the woman, it would make life more pleasant, especially for the children, if she could find a way to establish a more cordial relationship. ‘Perhaps I shall do just that,’ she’d said brightly and left it at that.

Though it was now a bit later than she’d intended, the task of putting away the supplies she’d obtained in Bristol and the storytelling having taken longer than anticipated, she still had time to visit the library. Encouraged by her employer’s friendlier reception this afternoon—he hadn’t entirely retreated, even when she’d pleaded with him to see more of the girls—she’d decided to ask him about the schoolroom supplies. Most likely, once the Colonel and his brother were grown, all such items had been packed away, perhaps consigned to the attic. If the Colonel had some idea where they might be located, she could go in search of them first thing tomorrow.

Thinking it best to be cautious, she went quietly to the library on her own, without asking Mansfield to announce her. She’d heard that army officers serving in India were hard drinkers and the Colonel’s appearance this morning certainly seemed to confirm that. It probably wouldn’t be prudent to approach him about anything this evening if he were already in his cups.

The problem of how she would manage to open that heavy oak door without announcing her presence was solved by her finding it had been left ajar. Peeping inside, she saw the room was unoccupied.

Before she could turn away, disappointed, she noticed that the desk chair was pushed back and the desk itself boasted a fully lit brace of candles, a book and a whisky bottle sitting beside a half-filled glass. All of which suggested that the Colonel had only stepped out of the room for a moment and meant to return shortly.

She’d wait for him.

She walked in, intending to take the chair in front of the desk to which he’d invited her earlier. But just as she was about to seat herself, she noted one more object on the desk, sitting in the spot most brightly illuminated by the candelabra. Curious, she bent over it to take a closer look.

It was a miniature portrait in a gilded frame, she realised. Without thinking, she picked it up and angled it so that, from her position in front of the desk, the candlelight fell fully upon it.

A small boy with ash-blond hair and brilliant blue eyes smiled up at her. A small boy whose features reminded her strongly of—

‘What the hell do you think you are doing?’ an angry voice demanded.

Startled as much by the voice’s ferocity as the profanity, she looked up from the miniature to the incensed face of the Colonel pacing towards her, back to the portrait and up again. ‘You—you have a son?’ she gasped.

Reaching her, he ripped the small frame from her hand. ‘Had a son,’ he spat back. ‘Quite legitimate, I assure you, so you needn’t go all faint and maidenly on me. How dare you creep in here and snoop among my private things?’

‘I was not snooping!’ she cried indignantly. ‘I wished to speak with you, the door was open and the room appeared as if you’d only left it for a moment. I intended just to wait for you.’

‘Isn’t it anguish enough that he lies thousands of miles away, his little body trapped underground in a small wooden box with nothing but a stone angel to keep him company? Must I tolerate having indifferent strangers gazing upon his face?’

As he looked down at the portrait, his breathing went ragged, his jaw worked and tears sheened his eyes. ‘His beloved face,’ he whispered.

Horrified by what she’d inadvertently discovered, agonised by his agony, Olivia stood speechless, her mouth open in shock.

Before she could dredge up a reply, with his eyes still locked on the portrait, the Colonel made a swishing motion with his free hand. ‘Leave,’ he said, his voice raw. ‘Please, just leave me.’

Picking up her skirts, she ran from the room.