Читать книгу Some Kind of Incredible - Katherine Garbera - Страница 10

Nick had been at some low places in his life but never had he felt like this. The night was pitch dark and he was thankful that Lila was silent as they drove. He didn’t think he could take much more conversation from her at this point. In his mind’s eye he was surrounded by an image of Lila’s wide brown eyes brimming with a sheen of tears.

Though his mind screamed for him to back away his body relived the incredible rightness that their joining had brought. And he knew that he should regret that he hadn’t used a condom when they’d made love, but deep inside he was glad he hadn’t. His groin still throbbed at the remembered feel of her around him.

Lila had been the fulfillment of his dreams, of what a woman could be. But she was his assistant, dammit. How could he have let this happen?

But he knew once hadn’t been enough. In fact, as he came to a stop in front of her building, he knew that he wanted to come up tonight and mate with her again. To cement what was between them so that she didn’t have to react with her sharp tongue.

“Well, thanks for the ride,” she said and then a bitter laugh escaped her. “I meant the car ride.”

“Lila, stop it. I’m sorry for the way that our first time happened, but I won’t let you think it meant nothing to me.”

“I’m sure you say that to all the girls, Nick.”

“I don’t have a stock of lines I pull out for the appropriate moment.”

“I’m relieved.”

She looked at him, but her expression was indiscernible in the feeble light of the street lamp. He knew his reaction earlier had made his comments seem, well, like a lie, but truer words had never been spoken. Lila meant more to him than the faceless ladies in his past and she deserved better than a burnt-out executive whose only emotion was cold, hard lust.

Except it hadn’t felt cold or hard when he’d been with Lila. Buried in her sweet warm body he’d felt like he’d found the home he’d been forcing Colette, Inc. to be for years.

“Are you feeling better?”

She shook her head, the silky length of her blond hair was illuminated by the light of the moon. He wished he’d taken his time with her. He wished they’d had all night to learn each other’s bodies instead of a hurried explosion in his office. He wished that he could go back to the moment he’d pulled away from her and lie against her breast and comfort them both.

“I can’t do this right now. I’m achy and not myself,” she said.

“That’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I’m feeling mean, Nick. And I want to hurt you so deeply that you’ll still feel it weeks from now.”

“If it would make you feel better.”

She looked out the window, and when she spoke again her voice was so soft he had to lean in to hear it. “My mother gave birth to me when she was only sixteen. I’ve never met my father.”

Simple sentences. Simple words that summed up a life that was anything but simple. He hadn’t realized how complex the situation was, but now he did.

“We’re not in that situation.”

“No?”

He wanted to do the right thing, to say he’d marry her if she found out she was pregnant with his child, but he knew he couldn’t. The low points in his life were manageable because he’d found a way to guarantee they never happened a second time. He’d made the vow never to marry again because Amelia’s death had cut through the layers of who he was and left him a quivering mound of insecurity. If there was one thing he wouldn’t tolerate it was weakness.

“Well, you’re not sixteen.”

She reached for the door handle and Nick hit the locks.

“Let me out of the car.”

“I can’t.”

“Don’t be silly. You run a multimillion-dollar division for a large corporation, this should be a cinch for you.”

“I want you to tell me that you’ll stop beating yourself up about this. I seduced you.”

“I had no idea you were this bossy in your personal relationships,” she said, whipping her head around to face him. She leaned in close and he could taste her breath as it brushed across his face.

The leather seats and her scent teased his mind, tempted him to pull across the gearshift as he had this morning and kiss her until she was too exhausted to talk.

“You didn’t seduce me.”

He had. He knew he had. He’d been feeling out of control and had called on the one thing he could count on. Lila. She’d soothed him and comforted him and taken him out of his skin to a place he’d never really been before.

And he’d repaid her by possibly impregnating her. God, his technique could use some work. Except with Lila all those practiced moves didn’t work.

“I’m not about to debate this with you. Thanks for bringing me home.”

She manually unlocked the door and opened it. The chilly evening air swirled inside. It swept through the warmth and seeped into his clothing.

She closed the door and walked away without a backward glance. He watched the fluidity with which her limbs moved, while surrounded by the scent of her perfume and the chill of the autumn evening. The pain in his soul was unexpected but no less sharp than a knife to the gut.

Lila Maxwell already meant more to him than she should, but watching her walk away hurt. And knowing that he’d brought her pain added to the hurt that was layering through him.

Lila was tired by the time three o’clock rolled around. She’d been up since five in the morning baking pies and breads, which she’d dropped off at the Youngsville Nursing Home on her way to work. The route had taken her twenty minutes in the opposite direction, but she hadn’t minded. She’d needed the therapy that baking had brought.

She’d tried leaving Rose’s brooch at home but hadn’t been able to. It complemented the deep-brown silk shirt she wore with a long black skirt.

Longingly, she fingered the piece of jewelry, then dropped her hands to her keyboard and forced herself to get back to work.

Nick had been out of the office all morning, which meant she’d fielded a lot of calls from concerned staff on both the international and domestic teams. Lila didn’t mind the extra time on the phone because it kept her mind busy. And busy meant away from that open door leading to Nick’s office.

The phone rang as Nick returned to the office. Lila scheduled an appointment for Nick for the following week and pretended that he wasn’t standing on the other side of her desk staring at her. Pretended that he was still just a casual acquaintance. Pretended that last night had never happened.

She concluded the call but didn’t move. She was an efficient secretary until Nick walked into the room.

“Aren’t you going to look at me?” he asked, taking the handset from her grip and depositing it in its cradle.

“Sure,” she said, smiling up at him. All business, she reminded herself. “You need to sync your Palm Pilot. There are three urgent messages and an update to this afternoon’s calendar.”

“I’ll do it right away. I’d like a few minutes of your time,” he said. He was tired. He rubbed the back of his neck and loosened his tie. She wanted to pull him into her arms and offer him comfort. But couldn’t.

She glanced at her day planner. Of course the afternoon was empty. But she wasn’t ready to accommodate him. In the middle of the night as she lay in her bed staring at the cracks in the ceiling she’d realized that life gave you what you sought out. And she was seeking more than a man who couldn’t commit to her.

“I’m in the middle of a proposal. Maybe later?” she suggested, knowing his afternoon was booked.

Suddenly she realized why people advised you not to get involved with someone at work. It made the atmosphere very tense and uncomfortable. Before, they’d been a team, and Lila had felt that she had his respect. But not anymore.

He put his hand on hers. It cut to the core. His big, warm hand surrounding her small one. Protecting, cherishing. His forefinger moving in a slow sweep from wrist to knuckles. “Lila…”

Not fair, she thought. But she nodded and stood, reluctantly tugging her hand from under his. “I only have five minutes.”