Читать книгу A Marriage On Paper - Kathryn Ross, Kathryn Ross - Страница 7

THE air-conditioning wasn’t working in the apartment. Alicia had struggled to fix it for the last hour, but to no avail. The heat was making her feel a bit sick.

‘Never mind,’ she said brightly to her sister. ‘Dex will be here soon and he’ll be able to sort it out.’

‘I wish he’d hurry,’ Victoria moaned. ‘I’ve got a load of homework to do, but in this heat all I want to do is fall asleep.’

Alicia glanced at her watch. It was seven o’clock. Maybe if she phoned Dex he would come over early. She picked up the phone and dialled his number.

There was no answer from his apartment. Where could he be until now? Surely still not discussing business with Maddie?

‘I’ll get you some iced water,’ she said to her sister as she put the phone down. ‘Maybe that will help.’

Victoria pulled a face. ‘It would be a better help if you knew how to do these formulas.’

‘I’ll have a look, but maths isn’t really my subject.’ Alicia went over to the fridge. The cool air that hit her when she opened the door was a relief. She felt like leaving it open and pulling their chairs over to sit in the open doorway.

The apartment was far too small for the two of them. There were two tiny bedrooms, with a bathroom between, and then this kitchen-cum-living room. That was it, but it was all Alicia could afford. She was supporting Victoria through school, and that took all her extra cash.

She glanced over at her sister as she threw her pencil down on the kitchen table. ‘This is impossible,’ she groaned, raking a hand through her long blonde hair in frustration.

‘It can’t be that difficult.’ Alicia poured their drinks and went to sit next to her. Although there were only three years between them, Alicia acted more like a mother towards Vicky than a sister. It had been that way since Alicia was just nine years of age and their parents had died in a car crash.

From that first night when they had found themselves at Albany House Orphanage she had felt protective and responsible. She had been the one to comfort Vicky, had remained strong and put on a brave face. It had been a first lesson on how to hide her feelings. Thinking about someone else meant you didn’t have to concentrate on your own feelings of grief, your own fears. In a way it had helped ease the pain of loss. It had certainly made her grow up quickly.

When Alicia had been old enough to leave Albany House she had taken Vicky with her. Now they were quite happy here in this apartment…usually, anyway, when the air-conditioning was working and Alicia didn’t feel quite so nauseous.

They struggled on together with the maths project. It was difficult, and they were both so absorbed in it that Alicia didn’t notice how late it was getting. It was almost nine when Dex finally arrived at their door.

‘Hi, sorry I’m late.’ He reached to kiss her cheek.

‘Are you?’ She glanced at her watch and her eyebrows rose, but she said nothing.

‘God, it’s hot in here! What have you done to the air-conditioning?’ Dex strolled over to the control box on the wall.

‘Nothing. It just won’t work.’ Alicia watched as he opened it up, studied the timing on it, turned a few buttons and snapped it down again.

Cold air gushed from the vents instantly. ‘Your sister is hopeless when it comes to anything mechanical.’ He grinned over at Vicky in a conspiratorial kind of way.

Vicky smiled back at him. ‘Thanks, Dex. You don’t know anything about formulas, do you?’

‘Let’s have a look.’ Dex sat down next to her and pulled the books closer so he could read them.

‘That air system is damn well temperamental,’ Alicia defended herself swiftly. She felt suddenly helpless. Why did Dex make her feel like that…as if her life wouldn’t run smoothly without him? She didn’t like the feeling. She had always been independent, needed no one…until she had met him.

‘This one isn’t right.’ Dex pulled a pen through a line of figures. ‘Look, there’s a very simple way to do this.’ He proceeded to do in five minutes what had taken them half an hour.

Alicia wrinkled her nose. ‘Coffee, Dex?’

‘Thanks, that would be good,’ he murmured without looking up.

‘Not for me, Alli,’ Vicky said swiftly. ‘I’m going to have a shower and an early night. I’m shattered.’

Alicia made the coffee, half listening as Dex very gently and patiently explained to Vicky where she had gone wrong with her work. She’d have to tell him about the baby tonight, she told herself forcefully. As soon as Vicky had gone for her shower she would break the news.

She handed Dex his coffee, then sat down next to Vicky, watching as she finished off her work.

Dex glanced across at her. She looked tired, he thought. He’d have to stop putting so much work on her. Sometimes he relied on her too heavily in the office. She was just so efficient, the best secretary he had ever had. He’d have to tread warily; he didn’t want to lose her.

He looked from Victoria to Alicia. In some ways they were so alike. Same delicate features, same long, naturally blonde hair. Both wearing shorts and T-shirts. Alicia didn’t look much older than Vicky…and Vicky was just a kid really.

‘How’s that?’ Vicky slid the book over towards Dex and he looked at it.

‘It’s exactly right. You’re brilliant,’ he enthused.

‘No, you’re brilliant,’ Vicky told him with enthusiastic emphasis. ‘I don’t know how Alli and I would manage without you.’

He shook his head. ‘You’d manage,’ he said quietly.

Something about the way he said those words made Alicia’s heart squeeze painfully. Maybe they would have to after she’d told him her news. The thing was that Dex didn’t love her. This was just an affair. It was wild, exciting, passionate…but it wasn’t serious. He had made it clear on several occasions that he didn’t intend to settle down and get married. Once he had said that if he did it would be when he was much older, when everything in his life was running smoothly.

‘You mean when you’ve got your pipe and slippers you’ll get a wife to match?’ she had retorted, her eyes sparkling with amusement.

He had laughed. ‘Something like that.’

‘Have you ever been serious about any of your girlfriends, Dex?’ she had asked suddenly.

His expression had changed. ‘I was engaged once…years ago.’

‘She must have been very special.’

‘She was.’ For a moment he’d been quiet, as if far away. ‘Clare and I were childhood sweethearts. We were the same age, grew up together, graduated from university together. I knew from a very young age that one day I would ask her to be my wife.’

Alicia remembered feeling hurt for a while. It was all right Dex telling her he didn’t want to get serious; she could accept that. She enjoyed their relationship, loved being with him. She was happy with the way things were—after all, she had Vicky to think about. But finding out that Dex had been in love once, had asked that woman to marry him, had made her feel disconsolate, made her wish that she could stir up such powerful emotions within him.

‘So what happened? Why didn’t you marry her?’

‘She died in a car crash on her twenty-third birthday. The morning we were to be married.’

The words had been simply said, with little emotion, yet the expression for one unguarded moment in the darkness of his eyes had been one Alicia would never forget. Her momentary pang of jealousy had melted into compassion. She knew what it was like to lose someone you loved.

‘These days I want to put all my commitment into my business,’ Dex had continued rapidly, as if speaking about work helped to chase the emotional shadows away from his mind. ‘Push my career to the limits, and play the stakes to the highest possible levels. If I had a wife and responsibilities I couldn’t take those kind of risks.’

She had gone along with him. ‘I can understand that. I don’t want to get married either. I’m twenty, Dex…I want a career and travel, success and excitement…’

She had meant those words at the time, but they echoed mockingly in her mind now.

Vicky cleared away all her books as if she was beating the clock, dumped them in her bag and headed for her room. ‘I’m just going to make a phone call,’ she muttered over her shoulder to Alicia.

Alicia looked across at Dex. He was still wearing the suit he had worn to the office today, she noted. Had he come straight from his meeting with Maddie? If so it had been a hell of a long meeting.

He met her eyes.

‘You realise that you’re a know-it-all,’ she told him lightly.

‘I prefer it when you call me a genius,’ he said with a grin.

She grinned back at him. ‘How did your meeting go, genius?’

‘Couldn’t have been better.’

‘Would you like a glass of wine to celebrate, instead of that coffee?’

‘No, thanks. I’ve already had a glass of champagne, and I’ve got to drive home.’

She very nearly said, No, you haven’t. You can stay here. But she stopped herself. It didn’t sound as if he wanted to stay. ‘It must have been a terrific outcome if you celebrated with champagne?’

‘Nothing is signed yet,’ he answered cautiously. ‘But I’m quietly confident. I have to go to Perth week after next—meet some of Maddie’s associates. I’m hoping to sign a deal while I’m there.’

‘Really?’ Alicia tried to sound pleased for him.

He nodded. ‘I’ll be relying on you to hold the fort here for me.’

She didn’t say anything.

Dex frowned suddenly. ‘Are you OK, Alicia? You look very pale.’

‘I’m fine. Just tired.’ She got up and went to pour her coffee down the sink. Then stopped with her back to him. What was she saying? She wasn’t fine at all. For a start her hormones were up the creek, she had never felt so over-emotional. She needed to talk to him. She had to tell him before she fell apart.

She turned and looked at him.

‘Dex, I have something to tell you.’ The words seemed to come out in a terrible rush.

‘It’s not about the modelling, is it?’ His voice was suddenly wary.

‘Modelling?’ She stared at him taken aback by the question.

‘Peter came in to see me this morning. Early, before you arrived.’

Alicia frowned. Peter Blake was one of her closest friends. In a way he was like the big brother she had never had. He was two years her senior and had grown up in the same orphanage as she had. He was a talented photographer now, had made a big name for himself taking terrific shots of the Queensland scenery.

‘He told me about the photographs he had taken of you,’ Dex continued. ‘In fact he brought them in to show me.’

‘Oh!’ She was surprised that Peter had done that behind her back. She had already told him that she wasn’t interested in taking up modelling.

‘They were beautiful,’ Dex said softly. ‘I was impressed.’

‘Were you?’ She smiled, embarrassed and flattered by that look in his eye, by that husky quality in his voice.

‘He told me that he had sent them to some big agency in Sydney and they were very interested in you. Then he accused me of standing in your way, obstructing your road to a rewarding career.’ His voice held an unusually harsh note. ‘I told him that you hadn’t even mentioned the offer to me, but I don’t think he believed me. Even if he did, he still continued to inform me that I was holding you back.’

‘That’s just rubbish.’ Alicia pulled away from the sink and went to stand by the table. ‘He had no right to talk to you like that.’

‘Are you going to take up the offer? Go to Sydney?’

‘No.’ She was annoyed with Peter for mentioning this to Dex. She had told him last week, when he had hot-footed over with the news, that she wasn’t interested in leaving here. Modelling was hardly a secure job; not many girls made it to the big time. Maybe if she’d been sixteen she would have stood a better chance, but not at twenty. Anyway, that was all immaterial now.

‘Why not?’

She hesitated. ‘For one thing it’s not a good time to uproot Vicky. She’s studying for exams.’

‘And you want her to have all the opportunities you never had, don’t you, Alli?’ he asked gently.

‘I want her to do well.’ Alicia shrugged.

‘There are good schools and great universities in Sydney, you know.’

She stared at him. ‘Do you want me to go?’

There was a moment’s silence, and it suddenly occurred to her that he thought she should take up the offer. Her heart pounded painfully.

He looked at her, and thought again about how young she was. ‘I want you to do well, be happy,’ he said softly. ‘You know how ambitious I am, how I’m putting all my energy into my career. I’d be a hypocrite if I said that’s OK for me but not for you. If you want something you should go out there and get it. I wouldn’t want to stand in your way…if it’s what you want….’ He trailed off and shrugged.

It wasn’t what she wanted. She hadn’t even given it serious thought. Not because of Vicky, not because she was expecting Dex’s baby, but because she couldn’t bear to leave him. She loved him with all her heart.

‘Strange how paths of opportunity seem to be opening up for both of us at the same time,’ Dex continued lightly, when she didn’t make any reply.

‘Everything happens at once.’ She tried to keep her voice light too, but it was laced with emotion even in her own ears. Dex wasn’t even a little bit in love with her. He couldn’t be, not if he was telling her it was all right if she left. ‘Trouble is, those paths seem to be leading off in different directions.’

He reached up and took hold of her hand. The next moment she was sitting on his knee.

‘That’s better,’ he murmured huskily. ‘So what are you going to do? Are you going to run off to Sydney and leave me? It sounded like a terrific opportunity the way Peter was talking.’

‘I suppose it is.’ Her voice was pensive. They should be discussing the baby, but somehow it seemed even harder to bring up the subject now that she knew he wasn’t averse to her leaving.

‘I suppose if I were to be truthful…not to mention selfish…I’d say I don’t want you to go,’ he murmured softly.

‘You don’t?’ Her heart missed a beat, her eyes widened as they met his. ‘Why?’

‘I’d miss you, that’s why,’ He smiled. ‘Apart from anything else, you’re the best damn secretary a guy could get.’

Her heart seemed to crash somewhere down near her toes. All right, so maybe a few weeks ago she’d have laughed at that. Now she felt as if she’d never laugh again. ‘I’m not going anywhere.’

He frowned as he looked into her eyes and saw the mist of tears there. ‘Alicia?’

‘I can’t go. I’m pregnant.’ She whispered the words softly. ‘Seven weeks, to be precise.’

She saw shock clearly etched on his handsome face. It was no wonder he was shocked. It wasn’t as if they had taken risks. She had been using a contraceptive.

‘It’s all right,’ she said quickly. ‘You don’t have to offer to marry me or anything…’

He shook his head, seemed lost for words. The expression of shock had been replaced by a look of guilt.

‘I’ll have to have the baby, of course,’ she continued swiftly. ‘I mean…I couldn’t contemplate the alternative.’

Still he didn’t speak.

The silence between them had never been so tense. And yet she continued to sit on his knee.

She reached out and touched his hair. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said unsteadily.

He closed his eyes. ‘Don’t say that.’

‘Why not? It’s how I feel—’

‘This is as much my responsibility as yours Alicia,’ he said finally, firmly. ‘You should have told me earlier.’

‘Why?’ She looked at him warily.

‘Because we’ve got a lot to sort out.’ His voice was calm. ‘What do you want to do?’

‘I don’t know.’ She shook her head, then met his eyes directly. ‘What do you suggest?’

He frowned, and thought for a moment. The minutes seemed to drag interminably. Alicia suddenly noticed little things, like the tick of the clock on the sideboard, the drip of the tap in the kitchen. Small, inconsequential sounds that normally wouldn’t have bothered her. Yet at this moment they seemed so loud they were almost unbearable.

Dex raked a hand through his hair in frustration. He didn’t know what to say to her. His eyes moved gently over the pallor of her skin, the wide blue eyes. It was best to be totally honest, he supposed. ‘You know I care about you deeply, don’t you?’ He ran a caressing finger down over the side of her face, but she flinched away from him as if his words had been an insult. He dropped his hand. ‘I just don’t know if I want marriage—’

‘It’s all right, Dex.’ She cut across him crisply. ‘I told you I don’t expect you to marry me. I don’t think I want to get married.’

He frowned.

‘The days of people getting married for the sake of a baby are gone, aren’t they?’ Alicia stood up. She couldn’t think straight when she was so close to him. Her mind was telling her to be practical; her body was telling her something much more emotional. ‘We’re looking at the twenty-first century, not the Dark Ages.’

‘Well…yes.’

Was it relief she could hear in his voice, or perplexity? It was hard to tell what he was feeling. The dark features were so schooled and controlled now.

She went through to the kitchen to tighten the tap and stop the drip. It was more an excuse to turn away from him and collect her thoughts for a moment than anything else.

She had thought about the possible ways this conversation might go many times over this last week. Sometimes she had imagined Dex telling her he had fallen in love with her and asking her to marry him. It was a fantasy. She had always known that the reality was going to be painful.

Dex was also glad of a moment’s respite, a chance to gather his thoughts.

Since Peter’s visit to his office this morning, his well-ordered, almost phlegmatic life seemed to have been given a good shake. A few realisations had dawned on him, among them the fact that for some time now he had been deliberately avoiding any deep analysis of his feelings for Alicia. He had been content with the status quo—to remain as it was. He was comfortable around Alicia. He liked and respected her enormously. She was mature for her years, trustworthy, fun, spirited. Perhaps he had been taking her for granted, which wasn’t very admirable of him.

It was only when Peter had said she might be leaving that his mind had been jerked awake and he had been forced to look closely at the situation. He didn’t want her to leave, was appalled at the prospect. Then guilt had stolen in. Alicia was mature for her years, but that didn’t change the fact that she was young, her whole life stretching ahead. He had no right to object to her leaving. Not unless he wanted to make more of a commitment to her. And that was where his dilemma had brooded, and remained too complex to solve.

He cared deeply for Alicia, but as to anything more…he wasn’t sure. Love was something he didn’t want to speculate on. He didn’t know if he was capable of such depth of feeling again. Since Clare he had been so determined not to get too involved, had decided it was better to just play the field and have fun. Dedicate himself to his work. That was when he had decided that if Alicia said she was leaving he’d let her go.

It had been an incredibly hard decision to make, and deep down he had hoped that she wouldn’t really want to go.

Now he found out she was pregnant with his child. He didn’t know what to do. He wanted to protect her, be with her. But that spelt commitment, and that was the one thing he had told himself he didn’t want.

Alicia came back to face him. He noticed how straight she stood, how proudly she held her head.

‘Maybe I should just pack things up here, leave Queensland for a while and head for Sydney,’ she said suddenly. ‘I could model for a few months while I still have my figure, and a new start might be what I need. At least jobs will be plentiful in the city—’

‘Don’t be crazy.’ He cut across her, his voice forceful.

‘I’m not crazy.’ She glared at him. ‘I can manage very well on my own, you know.’

Maybe she could. He knew Alicia didn’t lack courage, or determination. His eyes darkened. The thought of her struggling on her own in a big city with his child made a sudden tightness grow in his chest. He pictured the baby going through different stages of development with no influence from a father. Or, worse, Alicia marrying someone else. Someone who would bring his child up. The very thought made him get up from the chair. ‘You are not on your own,’ he said firmly. ‘You’ve got me.’

Her eyebrows lifted ever so slightly at that.

‘We could live together.’

She looked surprised by the suggestion, nearly as surprised as he felt. The idea had flown into his mind from out of nowhere.

She was silent, her heart thumping against her ribs. The idea gave her a moment of pleasure.

‘The baby could take my name; we could put it on the birth certificate,’ Dex said, warming to the theme. The more he thought of it the more it seemed a practical answer.

She frowned. He would be happy for the baby to have his name, but not for her to have it. That hurt. She shook her head. ‘No.’ The word came out more vehemently than she’d intended.

‘At least think about it.’

‘I don’t have to think about it. I don’t like the idea. For one thing, I don’t want my child to have a different name from mine.’

‘Why?’ He sounded genuinely perplexed. ‘It happens a lot nowadays, and as you said yourself we are in modern times.’

‘A few moments ago you were urging me to follow my dream and go to Sydney. Now you’re telling me you want the baby to have your name. What next? After it’s born are you going to suggest waving goodbye to me and getting a nanny for my baby?’

‘That’s unfair, Alli. I wouldn’t do that. And anyway, I didn’t know you were pregnant a few moments ago.’

‘Do you like the idea of being a father?’ she asked him abruptly.

‘Yes,’ he answered without reservation, and that took him aback. He frowned. ‘Yes…I really do.’ He spoke with a kind of wonder that wasn’t lost on Alicia.

She was pleased by his reaction, yet saddened by it too. If only he had discovered such a depth of feeling for her.

Dex raked a hand through his hair and continued calmly. ‘But I’m not trying to manipulate the situation to get custody of my child—’

‘My child,’ Alicia corrected him quietly. ‘I will have sole custody, care and control.’

‘Hell, Alli, you’re talking as if we’re getting a divorce, and we’re not even married.’

She shrugged. ‘We may as well be honest about things. There’s no point in pretending.’

‘And living together and giving our child my name will be pretending, will it?’ He sounded annoyed now.

‘There’s nothing wrong with living together. But in our case it will be pretending to have feelings that we just don’t have for each other.’

He was grim-faced now.

She waited for a moment, to see if he would argue with her about that, but he didn’t. She swallowed on a sudden lump in her throat. She hoped she wasn’t going to cry. Her pride was dented enough as it was. ‘Well, now that we’ve examined our feelings for each other, and found them totally lacking in substance, perhaps it would be the right time to end our relationship.’ She took refuge behind a bright, flippant tone.

His expression changed to one of incredulity. ‘What kind of suggestion is that, when we’re going to be parents soon?’

‘It’s the kind of suggestion a woman makes when she doesn’t want to end up feeling used.’ Alicia smiled, a crooked, and uncertain smile. ‘Better to finish the intimate side of our relationship while we still respect each other and are good friends.’

‘We have been good friends, haven’t we?’ he reflected gently.

‘The best.’ She took a deep breath. ‘Pity we couldn’t have fallen in love.’

He stared at her as if she had said something deeply profound.

‘Look, I think you had better go,’ she said with quiet dignity. She felt that she needed to be on her own now. Console herself, try and and think positively. ‘I’m tired, and—’

‘Alicia, I don’t want our relationship to end.’

‘Dex, you’re the father of my baby. But as for anything else—’

‘Marry me,’ he said suddenly.

She stared at him, taken aback, wondering if maybe she had misheard.

He went across and took hold of her by the arms, staring down into her face with earnest eyes. ‘I think if I let you walk away from me now, take my child out of my life, it will be something I will always regret.’

‘Dex, you don’t want to get married…we’ve been through this. We’ve decided that nobody gets married for the sake of a baby any more—’

‘I’ve changed my mind.’ He grinned. ‘It’s not solely the prerogative of a woman, you know.’

‘Dex, you’re acting crazy.’

He shook his head. ‘No…I’ve just realised how much I want this baby. I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. I want to give him or her a solid home-life, security, love.’

‘Very commendable.’ Her voice shook with anger. How dared he talk with such lavish emotion about their baby and yet propose so coldly to her? ‘But I can manage to give my child all the love and security it needs, thank you.’ She didn’t want Dex’s proposal. She’d rather be on her own than stuck in a loveless marriage.

‘Are you turning me down?’ He looked stunned.

If this hadn’t been so serious it would have been amusing, she thought. Dex was so supremely confident that it had probably never occurred to him that any woman could turn down his proposal of marriage.

‘Yes, I’m turning you down.’ She stepped away from him, her head high, her eyes flashing fire. ‘I told you I don’t want to get married.’

‘You weren’t really serious about leaving here… You can’t, not now you’re pregnant. You need me.’

‘No, I don’t,’ she snapped positively. She was in love with him, she wanted him, but she wouldn’t lower herself to accept him on these terms.

‘Don’t be ridiculous. You can’t manage on your own.’

‘Dex, we’re talking about the rest of our lives. That’s not something that should be decided on a whim. Now I think you should go.’ She needed to get him out of her apartment fast, while she still had her anger and her pride to hold on to.

He followed her towards the front door. ‘OK,’ he agreed with her solemnly. ‘It’s not something that can be decided rashly.’

‘Exactly, and a loveless marriage would just make all of us unhappy.’

She was aware that he was standing very close behind her. As she started to open the door he stretched across her and closed it again.

‘But love could grow.’ He whispered the words softly, his mouth against her hair, tickling her ear. She could feel the warmth of his body, smell his cologne. ‘It isn’t something that has to happen instantly, with a crash of cymbals and a choir singing Hallelujah.’

Her anger dissolved as quickly as it had erupted. Dex was a realist, a pragmatic businessman. He would think she was the most foolish woman in the world if she were to tell him that her love for him had been instant. From the first moment she had looked into his eyes she had known deep down that this was the man she wanted.

‘And to be honest, Alicia, I don’t think couples who rush into marriage with love shining a blinding light in their eyes are exactly thinking straight either.’ Dex shrugged. ‘When the lamplight dims and the magic starts to wane, the survival of any marriage depends on the couple’s ability to work at things. Suddenly it boils down to little things, like how much you’ve really got in common.’

‘And how much have we got in common?’ Alicia asked him with a wry smile.

‘A lot. Don’t you see, Alicia? We’re good friends; that has to be the most solid foundation of all to build a marriage on.’

‘Next you’ll be making a computer program of it,’ she murmured, a tinge of sarcasm in her voice. ‘I can see it now: ‘PLAN YOUR COMPATIBILITY BY COMPUTER or HOW TO SURVIVE MARRIAGE USING THE PRAGMATIC PC.’

Dex didn’t say anything for a moment. Then he grinned. ‘You know, that might be a good idea—’

‘Dex, I was joking,’ she cut across him impatiently.

‘I know you were joking, but it wasn’t a bad idea.’

‘Except that a computer can’t analyse feelings—’

‘Or sexual compatibility.’ Dex reached to take her hand and turned her to face him. ‘I’ll have to do some further research into it.’ He studied her silently for a few minutes.

Her lips were soft and inviting, her eyes misty with uncertainty. For all her bravado she was scared; he knew that. He bent his head and gently kissed her.

Her lips were sweet and trembling for a moment, then his kiss deepened.

She clung to him, responding hungrily to his touch. Maybe he was right. Marriage was a good solution.

He released her then, and smiled down at her. ‘We’ve certainly got the latter in abundance.’

‘The latter?’ She couldn’t think straight now.

‘Sexual compatibility.’ He grinned as her cheeks flushed a bright red.

She pulled away from him, her heart pounding. ‘But that isn’t enough to sustain a marriage, Dex, and you know it.’ Her voice was unsteady.

‘It’s a good start.’ He was unrepentant.

‘You can’t plan a marriage like a business campaign. Any relationship, whether it be living together or marriage, needs love to sustain it.’

He noted the shimmer of tears in her eyes now. ‘Oh, sweetheart, don’t look at me like that. It breaks my heart,’ he said softly. ‘I care about you so much…more than any woman in a long, long time.’

‘And I care about you.’ She lowered her eyes away from him. ‘But it’s not enough, is it?’

‘Look, we’re both tired; we need to sleep on things.’ His voice was infinitely gentle. ‘Let’s discuss this over dinner tomorrow night. I’ll book a table at Romanio’s.’

‘I don’t know.’ His closeness confused her. ‘I think we’ve said all there is to say.’

‘Now you know that isn’t true.’ He traced a finger over the trembling softness of her lips. ‘Come on, Alli. I’m just asking you to have dinner with me…please.’ His voice was low and huskily inviting. It sent her blood surging through her veins in a way that sizzled.

She nodded. Tomorrow night would be good. Vicky usually went straight to her friend’s house on a Friday night. Sometimes she slept over. It would give them time and space to sort something out.

‘Thank you.’ He bent and kissed her briefly on the lips.

‘You won’t say anything to anyone, will you, Dex?’ she asked him suddenly. ‘I mean about the baby. I’d rather wait until further into the pregnancy.’

‘That’s fine by me.’ Dex smiled at her. ‘See you in the morning.’