Читать книгу Their Baby Surprise - Katrina Cudmore - Страница 9
Оглавление‘I DON’T WANT or need you in our lives.’
Charlotte’s words smashed into him.
His car, now opposite the entrance to the darkly historic Tower of London, was snarled up in a herd of London double-decker red buses and he had to rein in the desire to leap from the car and run. To run off the adrenaline twitching in his muscles, drying out his mouth, spinning his heart in crazy arcs.
He was going to be a father.
Something he’d never wanted to be.
Never wanting the responsibility, the fear of failing his child, never wanting to mess up, never wanting to have to face the fact that he was no better than his own father.
And he had always believed that a child deserved to be brought up in a loving environment with committed, responsible parents. Everything he didn’t have.
But a failed, tempestuous, torturous marriage when he was in his late teens had proved to him that he was totally incapable of any such commitment.
And now, before he could even start to process it all, to make sense of this turn in his life, Charlotte was trying to snatch it away.
Those sea-green eyes steadily held his stare when he looked back at her, the only hint of her nervousness in how she fingered the cream lined pages of her notebook.
He leaned a little closer to her. She backed away, her hand rising to touch against the edge of her delicate jawline.
Pain radiated in his own jawline, moving up through his clamped teeth and into his cheekbones. The scar above his ear throbbing, throbbing, throbbing. ‘As you’re pregnant, I’m going to ask you nicely to explain exactly what you mean when you say you don’t want me in your lives.’
She recoiled a little at first but then sat more upright in her seat, both hands running over the material of her black skirt. She settled challenging eyes on him. ‘You don’t want to be a father, not with your lifestyle and commitments... Let’s not get into an argument about this.’
‘Are you saying that I wouldn’t be a good father?’
Her head snapped back at his growl. Crossing one long leg over the other, she held her hands in a tight bunch on her lap. ‘Oh, come on, you’re constantly travelling, your social life keeps at least three celebrity magazines in business. Are you seriously telling me that you have time to fit being a father into that schedule? That you even want to be a father?’
Irritation tightened his chest. She might be right in everything she said, but a sense of being cheated out of something he hadn’t even begun to understand had him ask quietly, ‘And you think you have the right to make that decision for me?’
She grabbed her black leather handbag off the floor of the car and sat it on her lap. She lobbed her notebook into it and hugged the hard lines of the small rectangular bag to her stomach. ‘When it comes to protecting my baby, yes.’
He inhaled a deep breath. ‘Are you seriously saying that you have to protect this child from me?’
‘Well, you’re hardly “father of the year” material, are you? I don’t believe for one minute that you really want the responsibility of a child.’
She had to be kidding.
‘I’m a CEO of a company with a thirty-billion turnover, for crying out loud. Responsible should be my middle name.’
She gave him a satisfied look, the look of a prosecutor knowing they had caught the defendant out. ‘Tell me, just how many companies have you acquired in the past ten years?’
He folded his arms. ‘Sixteen.’
‘And how many countries have you lived in?’
‘What are you getting at, Charlotte?’
‘The way you constantly move around the globe is hardly the sign of a man able to give stability and commitment to a child, is it?’
This conversation had gone too far. He leaned closer to her and growled, ‘Let me get this straight. You want me out of your lives but yet are expecting me to blindly trust you in raising my baby?’
The words my baby leapt from his mouth unconsciously.
Charlotte looked at him aghast. ‘I’ll give my baby security, routine. I’ll be the best mother that I can be.’
Beneath her defiant tone, there was a nervousness she didn’t quite manage to disguise. Was she as confident about being a parent as she was trying to portray? ‘Did you want this—to be pregnant? To be a mother?’
She lifted one of the gold chain handles of her bag, the only hint of flamboyance in her entire wardrobe, and twisted it around her index finger, the metal tightening as she twisted once, twice, three times. ‘Not until now.’
‘Why?’
She gave a shrug. ‘I was focused on my career.’
Dieu! This was such a mess. A thought tugged in his heart and leaked out into his chest: this baby deserved better than this. He needed to start focusing on the practicalities, understanding just where they stood. ‘Are you seeing anyone else?’
She eyed him warily. ‘Why are you asking?’
He fisted his hands, a stab of jealousy sideswiping him at the possibility that she was dating someone. ‘I want to understand who will support you.’
She unravelled the chain from her finger, in one fast, furious movement. ‘You’re the father. There’s no one else in my life.’ She paused and vigorously rubbed the red welts the chain had left. ‘I know you might find all of that hard to believe given your social life, but it’s the truth.’
He itched with the desire to reach for her finger and soothe her skin himself. That night she had touched him lightly, tenderly, almost reverentially with those delicate hands. That feather-light touch just one of the many inexcusable reasons why he had broken his own ethical code that he never dated employees, never mind slept with them. Exasperated at his own weakness and lack of honour that night, he said sharply, ‘Don’t believe everything you read in the media.’
She rose a disbelieving eyebrow. ‘I saw a picture of you with Annabelle Foster online over the weekend.’
Yes, Annabelle Foster, a TV news reporter, had accompanied him to a Homelessness charity ball, but they had left early, his driver dropping Annabelle directly home. Alone.
Since his night with Charlotte he had dated a few women, but he had ended each date early, a restlessness making his bones itch as he had tried but failed to focus on his date across the restaurant table from him, images of Charlotte’s vulnerable, tender, passionate gaze when they had made love in his bed leaving him with no appetite. For anything.
‘It’s tiresome to attend functions on my own. I enjoy having company, but that doesn’t mean it’s anything more serious than a night out.’
She considered his answer with a suspicious frown but then, with an it doesn’t matter anyway shrug, swung her bag back to the floor. She gave him the faintest whisper of an understanding sigh. ‘I know this must have come as a shock to you. It did to me. But I want this baby... I want to give him or her the same happy childhood I had, with lots of love, laughter, happiness, certainty.’
All of the things he hadn’t had as a child. Instead he’d had arguments and accusations and animosity.
The worst being the night he’d woken to hear his mother sob downstairs that she hated her life, hated being married to his father, hated being tied down with a child with no way out.
His father had lashed back demanding to know if she seriously thought he wanted any of this, a nightmare marriage, his dreams of university, of a better life, long abandoned as he was now straddled with a wife and child to support.
It was another four years before they divorced, five years until his mother eventually threw Lucien out for punching her new boyfriend. Her boyfriend had caught Lucien stealing his beer and had flung a beer can at him. Lucien, sick of the controlling bully who spent his days belittling his mother, had launched himself at him, long past caring about the consequences of anything he did in life. He had ended up with a permanent scar over his ear and living in a fleapit in Bordeaux at the age of seventeen. But at least there, there wasn’t the constant silent, frightening tension of waiting for another bitter argument to start.
History could not repeat itself. This baby was never to feel unwanted.
That thought hit him hard in his gut, in his heart.
‘So who will support you in raising the baby?’
Her arms folded tightly on her waist. ‘My parents will be nearby. I know they will adore being grandparents.’
Which was something...but a feeling of loss, of not being in control of how his life was changing, of needing to make sure he got this right had him warn, ‘Being a single parent won’t be easy.’
She closed the window beside her and gave a shrug. ‘I’ll manage.’
But would she? He didn’t know her, not really. For a few crazy hours he had experienced a connection with her that had flummoxed him, but with hindsight he had recognised that it had been nothing more than a mutual powerful attraction.
And now she was expecting him to be happy with entrusting her with raising his child. What was the best thing to do? For the baby? Neither he nor Charlotte mattered in all of this. ‘Don’t you think a child has the right to know its father, to benefit from that support?’
White teeth bit down on the soft, tender plumpness of her lips. He cursed silently at the drag of attraction that barrelled through him.
She pulled on the collar of her plain lilac blouse and eyed him impassively before she answered, ‘Perhaps, but only if the father wants and is capable of doing so.’
Fresh irritation swept through him. He set furious eyes on her. ‘You’re making a lot of dangerous assumptions.’
She held his gaze, her mouth now a thin line of scepticism. ‘Am I?’
‘Let me be clear. I’ll make the decision as to my role in this baby’s life. Starting with understanding just how you propose to raise it. Are you going to work full-time? Who will take care of it when you do? Have you thought through the financial implications? Who else in your life will support you? What happens if something happens to you, you get sick or are in an accident—who will care for the baby then?’
‘Nothing’s going to happen to me.’
She spoke with a tremor in her voice. For a moment he paused, taken aback by the fear in her eyes...the same fear and vulnerability he had seen the night they’d spent together. Inexplicably he was hit with the urge to reach out for her again, to pull her soft body against him, to whisper that everything would be okay. Just as he had done that night.
Canary Wharf Tower, a touchstone for the command of commerce and finance in London, was now visible in the distance. Until thirty minutes ago he had thought of nothing but business and stamping his mark as the most successful owner in the global construction sector. He had worked for almost twenty years to achieve that position, moving from labourer to site management and then into operations. Moving companies, moving countries, working, working, working. Acquiring small companies in the early days and rapidly and aggressively expanding those by taking risks, all the time defying economic predictions. Needing to prove he was strong, that he wasn’t a failure, wasn’t a coward.
The feeling that he was at a critical crossroads in his life moved through him, dancing from his whirling brain down to the confusion plugging his chest. ‘How can you be sure nothing will happen? None of us know what the future holds—you need support in raising a baby.’
She reached down for her handbag again and, placing it on her lap, searched through it, not looking towards him when she answered, ‘I’m sure friends will help me.’
‘And your parents?’
Her fingers clasped the sharp, firm ridges of her handbag bottom. She eyed him warily before mumbling, ‘They’ll be supportive but they’re elderly.’
‘Have you siblings?’
‘No and I don’t see what the issue is here. Lots of people are happily brought up in single-parent homes.’
‘The problem is that I don’t like being given ultimatums. I will decide what involvement I want, when I’m ready to do so.’
She turned to stare out of her window.
When they passed a signpost for the Docklands Light Railway, Blackwall Station, he knew they were close to the airport.
Her gaze fixed on the outside world, she said in a low voice, ‘Even though I don’t want you in our lives.’
He closed his eyes for a moment, her words stinging hard.
He was another mistake in a woman’s life.
Too angry to speak, he willed away the remaining ten minutes of his journey.
He needed space and time to think.
He needed to get away from the woman next to him. The soon-to-be mother of his child. He see-sawed from an infuriation at her coldness, her icy assertion that she didn’t want him in her life, to a deep desire to tug her to him and kiss away that frozen exterior to the warm, passionate woman he had spent the night with.
When his driver pulled up at the departure terminal at City Airport, he turned to her. His words were lost for a moment when he once again was pulled under by her fragile beauty: the pale skin over high cheekbones, the plumpness of her lips, the high arched eyebrows over sea-green eyes that mostly belonged to the Arctic Circle but occasionally reminded him of the sun-kissed warmth of the turquoise sea by his villa in Sardinia. ‘What you want isn’t important. I’ll do what’s best for our baby. We’ll speak again when I return from my business trips.’
He jumped out of the car and stalked away but pulled up when he heard her call his name.
She stood behind the door he had exited, her hands clutching the frame. ‘I’ll still be handing in my resignation letter later today.’
He walked back to her and stared down into those defiant eyes. She pulled the car door even closer against her body.
He leant down close to her ear and whispered words that came from the very centre of his being. ‘Trust me, I’m not going to let you go that easily.’
* * *
Later that evening, Charlotte left the open expanse of the Thames river walkway in Bankside to scoot down Clink Street. The dark narrow cobbled street once again sent an involuntary shiver through her. Now a fashionable part of London, this historic area, famous for Clink prison, still held a hint of menace. And she loved it.
She loved all of London. It was why she walked to and from her work in St James’s to her home in Borough every day. Her journey took her past Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament. Then the London Eye, the giant wheel always making her smile when she remembered her mum’s terror when they had ridden it for her fourteenth birthday. And towards the end of her walk came her favourite, Shakespeare’s Globe Theatre. The timber construction embodying the history that this city was steeped in and the determination of its people to continue its rich and vibrant culture.
And now she was going to have to leave all of this. Leave her apartment, leave her challenging but exhilarating work, leave this buzzing city. She was leaving for all of the right reasons, but she would miss this life she had worked so hard to achieve.
Lucien’s question earlier that day as to who would care for her baby should something happen to her came back to plague her again. She yanked the strap of her rucksack tighter on her shoulder, her sports-trainer footsteps falling silently on the cobbled street. What if her depression did return? Not that he knew anything about her past illness.
A tight, tight, tight cord lashed itself around her throat.
How would she care for her baby if it did come back?
That’s not going to happen. I’m strong now.
She passed a noisy popular fusion restaurant and looked away from the smiling and animated couples and large groups of friends dining there. They all seemed so carefree.
In her final year at university she had been sucked deeper and deeper into depression. Not that she had understood any of that at the time.
At first it had just been a feeling of being overwhelmed by her workload, her looming exams and the self-imposed pressure of achieving a first-class degree. Unable to concentrate, constantly tired, her mind swamped by a sense of hopelessness. She’d kept it hidden for months. Not wanting to be thought of as weak. Feeling a complete failure. Not wanting to be a burden to anyone. Eventually she had told her boyfriend Dan and best friend Angie. And had somehow managed to drag herself through her final exams.
On the night of her final exam she had told Dan once again that she was too tired to go out. To her relief, for once he hadn’t become quietly irritated with her. But later she had changed her mind. Hoping that now that the exams were over just maybe she would be herself again.
With that glimmer of hope sustaining her, she had made her way to the riverside pub. And had found Dan and Angie in the beer garden. Kissing. Intimately. Lovers intimately.
Dan had been the first to see her. He had broken away and approached her with a guilty but almost relieved look on his face. Within minutes she had learned that they had been dating for weeks. And it was over between herself and Dan.
She had gone home to her parents that night. Broken. And had spent the following year slowly dragging herself out of the swamp of depression.
In the years since, she had wrapped up all the memories of that year into a tiny capsule that sat deep within her. Knowing that she needed to mind herself, protect herself against the depression returning. And she did that by telling herself that she was strong, protecting herself in relationships, and guarding herself against men who might hurt her again.
She passed an upmarket burger restaurant and walked on by. But a few steps on she came to a stop and turned around.
She needed a milkshake.
Twenty minutes later, she turned right onto Kipling Street, sucking hard on the thick sweet vanilla mixture, fears at bay for now, just glad to see her apartment block further down the street and the prospect of watching escapism TV for an hour.
The drink straw dropped from her mouth.
And her shock was much too quickly superseded by the hot heat of embarrassment and soul-destroying attraction.
Leaning against the door of this dark saloon, Lucien was talking on his phone. Earthy, menacing, sexy.
He hadn’t seen her yet.
She pushed away the impulse to run away and instead put the milkshake carton in a nearby bin, tidied the strands of hair that had escaped her ponytail, grimaced down at her purple and blue leggings and dark navy sweatshirt, and tightened her grip on her rucksack handle.
He became aware of her when she was twenty paces away. He continued to talk on the phone but he watched her intently. Every. Single. Step. Of. The. Way. Green eyes narrowed, lazily travelling down her body and back up again.
He was tieless, top button undone, his shirt sleeves rolled up. His dark brown hair was cut tightly into his scalp at the side, the top a little longer and curling slightly, adding to his air of menace. The powerful strength of his fighter body was clear in his muscular forearms, the broad width of his shoulders, the long length of his legs, planted wide apart.
Lucien didn’t look like the other suave CEOs that swarmed London. Instead he looked like a dock worker from Marseille who modelled and took part in mixed martial arts in his spare time.
She hated how attracted she was to him.
She hated how her body melted just seeing him, the tight longing that pulled hard within her.
She hated the physical hunger that froze her brain and all logic.
Destructive, crushing chemistry.
She came to a stop a few steps away from him and he finished his call.
They stared at each other and she raised an eyebrow. Determined not to be the first to talk. To ask him why he was here. To say that she thought he was away on business for the next fortnight.
His gaze dropped down along her body again. And stopped on her stomach. Heat blasted through her at the intimacy, protectiveness, ownership of his look.
Her heart thudded in her chest.
He was the father of her child.
They would be bound for ever.
A thought that was mystifying, incredible, terrifying.
She cleared her throat loudly and dropped her rucksack down in front of her, to swing against her legs. Her arms now shielded her belly.
‘We need to talk,’ he said.
She wanted to say no. This morning had been way more difficult than she had ever anticipated. In perhaps complete naivety she had thought Lucien would be shocked but accepting of her plans for the future. He wasn’t father material, after all. She had sat at her desk all day thinking about what he had said. And come to the realisation that she needed to reassure him of her ability to care for their baby.
He gestured down the street. ‘We can talk in a café on the High Street.’
‘The smell of coffee makes me nauseous.’ She hesitated for a moment as the lines around his eyes tightened. In concern or dislike at another reminder of her pregnancy? With a sense of inevitability and a need to get this over and done with, she added, ‘We can talk in my apartment.’
Lucien said something quickly to his driver and then she led the way into the 1960s redbrick block.
Inside the foyer, he reached for her rucksack. ‘I’ll carry your bag.’ For a brief moment their fingers met. Their gazes clashed and all of the intimacy, the intensity, the closeness of their night together rushed back.
She yanked her hand away and, not welcoming the prospect of being stuck in the tight confines of the lift with him, led him to the stairwell instead.
Walking alongside him up the stairs, she asked, ‘What explanation did you give Human Resources for wanting my address?’
He looked at her with a hint of bemusement. ‘The HR director has enough sense not to ask.’ Then his features fixed back into their usual hard shrewdness. ‘I also spoke to Simon. He made no mention of your resignation.’
They had reached the third floor and she paused on the stairwell and answered, not quite able to meet his eye. ‘I didn’t resign... I’ll do so tomorrow.’
‘Why?’
His now dispassionate tone, so in contrast to the heat of his gaze in the foyer, his lack of understanding of how her life was being turned upside down and his insistence on questioning everything she needed to do had her answer crossly. ‘Simon was busy, and frankly I couldn’t face it...not after this morning. I couldn’t take another difficult conversation today.’ She paused, and as the true realisation of what she was giving up hit home she grabbed her rucksack off him. ‘I love my job. I’ve worked so hard over the years to get to this position.’ A lump suddenly formed in her throat. She knew of her reputation as a tough negotiator within the wider organisation, but within her department, where she was one of the most senior staff members and often mentored the younger staff, she was more relaxed, more herself. ‘It’s going to be hard to say goodbye to everyone.’
She twisted around and stormed through the door into the corridor that led to her apartment. As she searched her rucksack for her keys he joined her at her front door and said, ‘You don’t have to resign.’
‘Yeah, that would work out just fine—me pregnant with the CEO’s baby and we can’t even bring ourselves to say hello in the corridors.’
‘That’s why I came back from Paris. We need to sort this out now.’
With tense fingers she opened the front door of her apartment, a heavy knot of anxious speculation landing in her stomach at his words, while simultaneously managing to worry about the trivial: what would he make of her minuscule apartment, especially in comparison to his vast five-storey Mayfair town house? But her love for her apartment’s bright open interior and pride that she had finally managed to get a foothold on the crazy London property market had her march in ahead of him.
In the open-plan lounge and kitchen she gestured to her grey velvet couch, silently inviting him to sit, and asked, ‘Can I get you something to drink?’
He didn’t sit but instead paced around the room. The room shrank around his restlessness, the power and strength of his body. Needing some oxygen against the tension in the room, she moved to the lounge window and opened it to the still-warm April air.
When she turned back to face him, he hit her with a non-compromising stare. ‘I want to be a part of this baby’s life on a daily basis.’
The knot of anxiety inside her twisted. ‘That’s not possible, you know that. I’m moving away from London.’
‘Don’t move away.’
She gestured around her apartment. ‘I need more space. I need to be near my parents. To have family close by.’
‘I agree, that’s why I believe you should move in with me...and, for that matter, why we should marry.’
She sank down onto the window seat below the open window. ‘Marry!’
‘Yes.’
A known serial dater was proposing marriage. This was crazy. He had the reputation for being impulsive and a maverick within the industry, but his decisions were always backed up with sound logic. And that quick-fire decision-making, some would even say recklessness, often gave him the edge over his more ponderous rivals. But he had called this one all wrong. She gave an incredulous laugh. ‘I bet you don’t even believe in marriage?’
He rolled his shoulders and rubbed the back of his neck hard, his expression growing darker before he answered, ‘It’s the responsible thing to do when a child becomes part of the equation.’
This was crazy. She lifted her hands to her face in shock and exasperation, her hot cheeks burning against the skin of her palms. ‘Have you really thought about what it takes to be a father? A child needs consistency, routine, to know that they are the centre of the parent’s life. Have you considered the sacrifices needed? Your work life, the constant travel, all of the partying—everything about the way you live now will be affected. Are you prepared to give up all of that?’
Standing in the centre of the room, he folded his arms on his wide imposing chest, his eyes firing with impatient resolve. ‘I don’t have a choice. This child is my responsibility and duty. I will do whatever it takes to ensure that it has a safe and happy childhood.’
‘I can give my baby all of that.’
‘You admitted this morning that you have limited support.’
‘I have my friends.’
‘Are they going to be there in the middle of the night when the baby is crying? Are they going to be there when you’re exhausted, when you’re sick, when you have work demands, when you need to be with your elderly parents?’
She flinched and lowered her head. Needing time to think.
Bitterly she accepted that he was right... She loved her two best friends, Tameka and Jill, both ex-colleagues from a previous employer, but she knew only too well the fragility of friendship.
When she’d had depression she had lost friends. Not wanting to be seen as being weak she had isolated herself, especially after Dan and Angie’s betrayal, but also their reaction when she had told them about feeling down and unable to cope. At first they had been understanding and supportive but as the weeks had passed she’d felt their impatience, their nervousness. Their eyes had said, Can’t you pull yourself together?
She stared down at the floorboards she had lovingly painted a pale pink last year, emotions sweeping through her.
Anger at those memories, anger at him for hitting so many raw nerves.
Frustration and guilt at being so daunted at the prospect of being the sole carer for a newborn, at the years that stretched out before her, knowing she was the only person protecting this precious life.
Fear about what would happen if her depression returned.
Anxiety about her parents’ slowly declining health.
Perplexity at how stupidly attracted she was to this heartbreaker.
Overloaded with all of those emotions, she rounded on him. ‘And are you going to be there in the middle of the night, when I’m exhausted, or are you going to be away travelling or out on a date?’
His expression tightened and he tilted his head back defiantly. ‘I will take my marriage vows seriously, including to be always faithful.’
The absolute resolution in his voice, the deceitful, guilt-inducing thrill in her heart at his words, blew her usual coolness even further out of the water. ‘Oh, please! You? Celibate? Are you kidding me?’
Heat entered his eyes, pinning her to the seat. ‘Who said anything about being celibate?’
She leapt up. ‘No way are we sleeping together again.’
He walked across the room and right up to her, inches separating them. He stared down at her, his eyes dangerously challenging her, daring her to lie about the attraction whistling through the air in the room. ‘Why?’
He spoke in a low whisper.
She swallowed hard, a shiver running through her. ‘Because you’re not my type.’
‘Which is?’
‘A serial dater who probably gets a kick out of breaking women’s hearts.’
A dangerous spark lit up in the corner of his eye. He moved even closer. She willed herself not to lean towards his heat, his gorgeous faint-inducing scent of leather and soap, his invisible pull that yanked on every cell in her body.
‘Afraid I might do the same to you?’
She stepped back. Away from his power. ‘No! Let me set you straight...my career and now my baby are all that matters to me. I don’t have time or interest in relationships.’
‘Good, so a working marriage will suit you perfectly.’
‘A working marriage?’
‘Think of it as a business relationship. We’ll both be clear that the only reason we’re married is for the welfare of our baby. Our mission will be to nurture and protect our child by working closely together and supporting each other in parenting him or her. It will be a team effort.’
He made it all sound so simple and logical. She shook her head and walked away, towards the kitchen counter, muttering, ‘I think I’m in a nightmare.’
‘This is the best solution. Our baby will have both parents in its life, you get to stay in London, stay working in the job you obviously love.’
Why was he doing this? There had to be more reasons than just because he felt responsible. Why would a player, a man known to live for his work, be willing to change his life so much when he didn’t have to? A horrible thought took hold. Was this proposal nothing more than appeasing his board and protecting his reputation? It wouldn’t look too good for a CEO to have got an employee pregnant. Even if he was the majority shareholder in the company. With a bitter taste in her mouth, she asked, ‘Do you want to marry so as not to damage your reputation?’
He considered her with amusement, a faint smile on his lips. ‘My reputation! Je m’en fiche complètement! I couldn’t care less. I’ll happily tell people that it was an accidental pregnancy and we decided to marry in order to raise our baby together. There is no shame in either. We’re simply being responsible and mature parents.’
Her mouth dropped open. ‘You’ll do no such thing.’
‘Why?’
‘My parents are elderly and conservative...they believe in the sanctity of marriage. They would be deeply upset if they knew I didn’t marry for love.’
Lucien threw his eyes upwards.
She eyed him angrily. ‘My parents have the most wonderful, loving marriage imaginable. Just because you’re totally lacking in any romance doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist for other people.’
‘Don’t tell me that you were waiting to be swept off your feet.’
She fixed him with her iciest stare. ‘Hardly.’
He looked at her warily. ‘Do you want romance, love...all of that fairy-tale stuff?’
She folded her arms and threw him an unimpressed look. ‘And here I was thinking all Frenchmen were romantics.’
‘A lot of us are grounded in reality.’
‘You’re so grounded I can practically see roots emerging from your shoes. To answer your question, no, I don’t want romance. Thanks to a few too many run-ins with men like you, I’ve been cured of all such desires... What my parents have is unique, but certainly not for me.’
‘Good, so there’s no reason why we shouldn’t marry. My PA has set up a meeting for us at the marriage registrar’s office tomorrow morning to give notice. You will need to bring your passport and proof of address. She also provisionally booked a slot for us to marry there in a month’s time.’
She swallowed the yelp of disbelief that barrelled up inside her. And fixed him with a deadly stare. ‘Wasn’t that a tad presumptuous on your part?’
‘Simply forward planning in the knowledge that your logical legal brain would see the sense of this plan. We have only seven months to get to know one another, to establish an effective working marriage. I want any potential issues resolved before the baby arrives.’
His words should have brought comfort; what he was proposing could, just maybe, work...on paper. Her baby would benefit from having another person in his or her life.
But what if Lucien proved to be unreliable?
And what of her attraction to him, how vulnerable she already felt around him? How she was always waylaid by her attraction to him, abandoning logic and self-preservation to the sound of his voice, the sight of his rugged face, powerful body, the pull of his clean, masculine scent.
She paced the room.
Dizzy, overwhelmed, giddy.
She had to think of her baby. And one thought kept snaking around her brain, around her heart. What if her depression returned? Who would take care of her child then?
She went to the kitchen counter and poured a glass of water.
The cold liquid calmed the nausea swishing around in her belly. ‘Do you mean it when you say that it will be a business relationship and nothing more?’
‘Let’s call it a team effort—we will raise our baby together and support one another at home and in our careers.’
His voice was calm, conciliatory, at peace with the decisions he had taken. A red rag to all of the fears coursing through her. ‘But will we be a team...or are you expecting me to make all of the changes? It’s me who has to leave my home, my independence. The plans I had already made for our future, the baby and me. Will you accept my desire to have a career of my own? Will you accommodate my friends, my parents, my interests? Or will I have to flex to your way of life? Will you change the way you work, your socialising? Will you welcome me and the baby into your life or will you always begrudge us?’
She had spoken angrily, her fear sitting at the base of her throat. She expected him to respond just as angrily but instead he walked towards her. He held her gaze while gently fixing a loose strand of hair behind her ear. ‘I will never make our child feel unwanted.’
His expression grew even gentler; concerned eyes swallowed her up. Just as they had the night they made love. ‘Don’t be so afraid.’
‘I’m not afraid.’
His smile told her she wasn’t kidding anyone. So she added, ‘It’s just that this is the craziest idea ever. We don’t know each other.’
‘We’ll get to know one another. You don’t have to do everything in life by the book.’ He lowered his head closer to her and whispered, ‘We can make this work, trust me.’
Her heart dipped and then soared in her chest.
He spoke with such strength, determination, even kindness, she forgot every reason why this could never work and said with a gulp, ‘Can we?’
His hand reached out and for a moment rested just above her hip. She stopped breathing. She fought the urge to move in closer. Longing to feel his arms wrapped around her, his body pushed against hers.
His gaze moved to her tummy and then back up to hers.
He lowered his head, his lips not far away from hers.
She fell into the green burning depths of his eyes.
His breath whispered across her lips.
She swayed closer.
His eyes burnt even brighter. And then his lips brushed against her cheek until he reached her ear. In a low voice he whispered, ‘We’ll make this work.’ His hand cupped her hip even more. ‘I’ll make sure it does.’
And then he was moving to the door. ‘Our appointment is at nine-thirty tomorrow. I will collect you at nine-fifteen.’
Dazed, she stared after him.
A gut-wrenching thought hit her.
Had she just witnessed a master manipulator at work?
She followed him to the front door, resolute that she was going to say no to everything he was proposing. There was no way she was agreeing to marrying this expert schemer...player...heartbreaker.
But before she could speak he turned and, with a quiet, intent dignity, he said, ‘I will be the best father and husband that I can. I’ll change my way of working, my socialising. I will be faithful to all of my marriage vows.’ He paused and his hand moved close to where her belly lay beneath her sweater top, his fingers tipping against the navy cotton. ‘Why wouldn’t I, when I have something so special waiting for me at home?’