Читать книгу Billionaire Bosses Collection - Кэрол Мортимер - Страница 31

She was staring at her stomach in the dressing room of her suite when her stomach rolled and she ran for the bathroom. She was sick again and this time she knew it was partly with worry.

She thought of her brother, Connor. Connor was strong-willed, the take-charge oldest sibling, a total alpha male who would want to make Zach marry her. He wouldn’t want to marry or he already would have talked about it. Zach would rebel and probably disappear to another country.

She shook again, chilled on the warm day. She ran a cold cloth over her face and went back to sit, knotting her fists and trying to think what to do, praying she was wrong.

She could leave, slip out without Zach even knowing and then say goodbye with a call from Dallas.

Too many things were so wrong. She had just tossed her future into uncertainty and chaos. Why had she ever stayed and worked for him? Why had she made love with him? Fallen in love with him when she had known it would be disastrous and hopeless? Why hadn’t the protection worked?

The Dallas job would go, too. If she stayed there, word would get right back to him. Just quit the company and go somewhere else, she told herself. By the time she was ready to tell Zach, he would probably be halfway around the world, far from Texas and from her. Soon she would be only a memory to him.

Standing in front of the mirror, she inspected her figure. She could get through Christmas without anyone knowing. Common sense said to stop worrying until she was certain, but that was impossible. All her positive reactions to past upheavals were gone now. She couldn’t hold the same cheerful certainty for herself and she needed to get a grip. This worry was not like her and there was a bright side. If she could just focus on the baby and try to avoid thinking about Zach. A total impossibility.

In her heart, there were no doubts. Because of their loving, she would become the mother of a Delaney. It seemed likely that Zach would help support his child, but that was all. A man whose heart was already given to traveling and his job would never be tied down by a family.

Feeling an ache of worry increasing, she rubbed her neck. Mary Kate was her closest sibling and she could tell her. The thought of Mary Kate’s support lifted Emma’s spirits slightly. Her sister would be a staunch ally and Emma was certain she could always count on her mother’s acceptance. If she could just keep Connor from doing something wild like wanting to punch out Zach.

She remembered Will and Ava and Caroline and the love that shone between Will and Ava, plus their eagerness when they had announced a baby on the way. Emma hurt, her insides twisting into a knot while tears threatened. She wouldn’t have that shared joy and love. This wasn’t the way she had always dreamed about having a family. The love she had wished for was what she had witnessed between Will and Ava.

Emma wiped her eyes and got up, walking restlessly, wishing she could undo what had been done. She had no one to blame but herself. How she wished she could back up and relive her life.

Then Emma thought about the baby and put her hand protectively on her stomach. Her baby. Her family would be shocked, upset, angry, probably even with her, but when the baby arrived, they would all accept and love the tyke.

This baby would fit into her family and they would shower the baby and her with love. Her brothers would be dads for the baby. Her child would not come into the world unloved or unwanted.

She stretched on the bed, staring into space while her mind raced over problems and solutions.

The first hurdle was to get through today with Zach. She was already packed, ready to go home. How was she going to be able to tell Zach goodbye?

An hour later she went down to work. Zach sat stretched out, his feet on a window ledge while he talked on the phone. She sat at her desk, unable to work, looking at him and thinking about the future.

She could tell he was getting ready to end the call, so she returned to the box of letters where she had spent all of her time lately.

As she picked up a letter something rattled inside the envelope. Turning the envelope over, she shook it. A golden heart locket on a chain fell into her palm. Glittering brightly in the center of the heart was a brilliant green stone.

She withdrew the fragile letter and read, looking up to interrupt Zach. “Listen to this letter: ‘… this was my grandmother’s locket with my great-grandmother’s and my great-grandparents’ pictures. I want you to have it because it should remain in the family to be passed to each generation.’ This letter is signed by your great-grandfather, so this locket must be incredibly old if it belonged to his grandmother.” Pausing, she put aside the letter. “Look at this beautiful locket. There are two tiny paintings inside with pictures, I suppose, of two more Delaneys, an even more distant generation.” She carried the locket across the office to hand it to Zach.

Standing, he took the locket to turn it in his hand and inspect it.

Finally he looked up and held it out. “Emma, you take this. I want you to have it.”

“Zach, I can’t do that! You have a family and some of your relatives may want it. You should keep that jewelry. It’s an heirloom and your great-grandfather wanted it to stay in the Delaney family.”

“You said you feel as if you are part of the Delaneys when you read those old letters. I want you to have it as a bonus for your work and to give you a tangible memory of all this history you waded through. Here,” he said, taking it from her and stepping behind her to fasten it around her neck.

“I really think you should keep this in your family,” she said and then realized part of her would become part of his family. She placed her fist protectively against her stomach.

“I want you to have it,” he insisted, taking her shoulders to turn her to face him as he judged how it looked on her. “It is pretty,” he added, his voice deepening while it thickened with desire. He looked into her eyes. She met his blue ones, her heart beating faster. She wanted his strong arms around her. She wanted to hold him while she kissed him. As if he could read her thoughts, he drew her to him and placed his mouth on hers.

Her heart slammed against her ribs. Zach pulled her close, holding her tightly while he kissed her hard and possessively.

Her pounding heart should indicate her feelings as she held him tightly in return. She let go all restraint, kissing him, her deepest love, the father of her baby. And she was certain she was pregnant. How she wished she didn’t ever have to tell him.

“Zach,” she said, on the verge of saying she would miss him. “Thank you for the necklace. Your brothers and your half sister may not be happy with you for giving away this heirloom.”

“My brothers would definitely want you to have it. Sophia, I don’t know. I want you to have it. Actually, I don’t think I’m making you much of a gift except I suspect you think so.”

She looked at the locket in her hand and got a knot in her throat as emotions choked her. “I do think so,” she whispered, knowing it would go to a Delaney heir.

Zach put his finger beneath her chin to raise her face. Embarrassed because she couldn’t hide her emotional reaction, she stood on tiptoe and kissed him quickly.

As their kiss became passionate, her emotions shifted. When she ended their kiss, they both were breathless and she suspected Zach had forgotten about her reaction to the locket.

“I’m going to miss you, Emma.”

“You can still come spend Christmas with us,” she said, certain of his answer.

He smiled. “Thanks, but I’ve already made arrangements. I’ll be at an Italian villa I inherited. Dad always referred to it as his ‘summer home.’”

His answer stung and made her leaving a reality. Yet it was for the best because now her emotions were on a rocky edge. They needed to part even though she felt as if her heart were breaking.

She placed her hand against his cheek. “I’ll think about you on Christmas in your Italian villa.”

“You are probably the one person in the entire world who feels sorry for me spending Christmas that way,” he said, smiling at her.

“I know what you’re missing.”

“We can both say that. You could come with me and let me show you that Italian villa and see how you like spending Christmas in Italy. Live a little, you have next Christmas with your family.”

“Thank you, but I’ll stay in Texas and you go to Italy. Zach, you get along with your family—your brothers and Caroline mean a lot to you. Realize what a treasure they are. Love and enjoy them. I think you shut yourself off in defense when you were hurt as a child. You have a wonderful family and your ancestors are fascinating. Don’t sell them short. Try a Christmas with Will and family sometime, get Ryan, Sophia and Garrett there, too.”

“You are a dreamer and a romantic,” he said patiently. “I will enjoy my Italian villa immensely. It will be sunny, beautiful with no crowds, no schedules. You really should try it.”

She shook her head. “Thank you. We’ll each go where our hearts are, only I think yours is there out of an old habit more than because you really enjoy it.”

“I suppose I never stopped to think about it.”

She stepped away and glanced at her watch. “I need to get on the road now. The job has been wonderful.” She tried to hold back tears as she stood on tiptoe to kiss him.

He held her tightly, kissing her fiercely. Finally, he paused. “You can stay this weekend if you want.”

“I have plans in Dallas,” she said, knowing it would be heartbreaking to spend the weekend and go through this last day again.

She stepped out of his embrace. It was time to go. She’d already said her goodbyes to Rosie and Nigel, and Nigel had already placed her things in her car.

Zach headed out with her, reaching around her to open the car door.

“You’ll hear from me,” he said.

“Maybe I’ll see you at headquarters someday,” she replied lightly, sliding behind the wheel. Closing the door, he stepped back and she started the car. As she waved and drove away, she glanced in the rearview mirror to see him standing in the drive, watching her.

She would tell her mother and sisters she had been invited to Zach’s Italian villa. Connor didn’t need to hear about it. An Italian villa sounded like paradise, but not at Christmas. That was definitely family time.

Family time. Worry and heartbreak stung. She couldn’t keep from crying until she thought about the baby and making plans. How and when would she tell her family? She’d wait until after Christmas because she had no idea how they would receive the news.

Zach had seemed good with Caroline and interested in her. How would he be with his own child? He had told her how they had struggled to get Sophia into the family and how much they wanted to know her. Surely, if he wanted to know his half sister, he would want to know his child.

The first thing was to get a pregnancy test kit. If she wasn’t pregnant, then all these worries would seem ridiculous.

Pregnant—it was a shock she couldn’t absorb. It was so totally unexpected because they had always used protection. Something she had never thought would happen to her until after she was married. She had always looked forward to her own family, but in her mind, it had included a husband who was an active family man. A reassuring thought now was the knowledge she would never be alone raising this baby because her family would all participate. Clinging to that, she tried to ignore the steady hurt squeezing her heart.

Christmas with a baby on the way. Would she have to give up college and her hope of teaching? Christmas had always been filled with magic for her, the best time of the year, and this Christmas would be so different. She would have to be responsible for someone else. It was an awesome task. She would get a present for her baby this week. And think of baby names. Her baby would not have the Delaney name. Another Hillman.

She missed Zach. As mismatched as they were, she liked being with him. He had been easy to work for. When she decided what and how she would tell him about the baby, she would get in touch with him. In the meantime, this break was as inevitable as it was necessary.

She fingered the locket around her neck. She thought it was a beautiful heirloom and she would take very good care of it. It would go into safekeeping for her baby soon.

She hoped Will prevailed on Zach to keep the letters. It would be sad to see them destroyed. Since she would be mother of a Delaney, if they decided to shred the letters, she intended to ask Zach for them.

She missed Zach badly and each mile between them increased her longing to be with him. She could have prolonged the separation, but there was no point and her emotions were on a raw edge. In a few hours she would be home and her family would keep her busy enough that the pain over parting with Zach should be alleviated.

By Monday, Zach missed Emma more than he had thought possible. He was planning to leave for Italy on Tuesday, but he had lost his enthusiasm for the trip. Should he do something else this Christmas? That was Emma’s influence. He recalled times as a child that he had wanted to be with his family, but then he and his brothers had been left at their schools for the holidays. Eating at the home of an indifferent headmaster had never been fun and Zach began to count only on his own company. He would be happy in Italy once he was there.

Earlier that morning Will had called his brothers and Sophia, and the entire family was coming for lunch today to bring their Christmas presents to him, so he was having a little Christmas celebration with his family. Emma would have been relieved to hear it, but now she was wrapped up in her own family’s activities. When he first was injured, Zach had given his secretary at headquarters a list of gifts to purchase for each member of his family. They’d been wrapped and delivered to the ranch.

Standing at the window, Zach looked at the dry, yellowed windswept landscape beyond the fenced yard. Why had life become empty without Emma? It had only been the weekend since she left, but it seemed eons ago. Common sense told him she was not the woman for him, not even in a casual way. He smiled at the thought. No relationship was casual to Emma. Not even the brief affair they had.

He paced the room restlessly. “Go to Italy,” he advised aloud. “Pick up your life and forget her.”

Memories flooded him of holding her, kissing her, making love to her. Of her laughter, her hands on him, her luminous green eyes studying him. Even the looks of pity she had given him came back to haunt him. Was he missing out on the best part of life as she had said? Was he letting that armor from childhood keep him from loving and being loved today?

Would he really want to be tied down with a family? Tied down with Emma? The last thought sounded like paradise.

Was he going to mope through Christmas? It was a time he had never given much thought to since he was grown.

He saw three limos coming up the drive so he left to open the front door.

Will, Ava and Caroline climbed out of the first limo. Ryan emerged from the second and Garrett and Sophia from the third limo. The drivers carried boxes filled with wrapped presents. Zach directed the drivers where to put the presents and then turned to greet everyone.

“Don’t tell me all this stuff is for me,” Zach said.

“Who else is here for us to give presents to? Although I do have one for Nigel and one for Rosie and I’ll bet the rest do, too,” Ryan said with a cocky grin. “You said you were giving Nigel and Rosie three weeks off.”

“And I did. Come in,” he said, picking up Caroline to give her a hug. He led them to the family room where the drivers had already placed boxes of presents.

A sofa beside a large wingback chair was piled high with Zach’s presents for his brothers, Sophia and their families.

“You should have had Nigel bring down the Christmas tree,” Will said.

“Don’t you start that. Emma had decorations up and I got rid of them.”

“You have turned into Scrooge,” Will said.

“Hardly,” Zach replied, waving his arm in the direction of the sofa with presents. “I believe I have a few presents for everyone.”

“My apology,” Will said, laughing. “Not entirely Scrooge. I do see mistletoe hanging over the door. That’s a weird decoration to put up for a man living alone.”

“Just drop it, Will,” Zach said.

“Maybe I should have stopped by last week and met the secretary,” Ryan said.

“Will a beer shut you two up?” Zach asked. “First, let me see about the drivers and get them settled with something to eat and drink. I’ll be right back. When I do, we’ll start this little family Christmas celebration that I suspect is totally for my benefit,” Zach remarked dryly.

When he returned he asked them, “Eggnog, beer, wine, martini, margaritas, Scotch, an old-fashioned—none of you have to drive home and I have a full bar, so what do you prefer?” he said, going behind the bar to fill orders. In minutes he brought out snacks Rosie had left.

Ryan held up his bottle. “Merry Christmas to our newest family member, Sophia, to Ava and Caroline, to my big brothers, to Garrett who’s been like a brother,” he said, including Garrett as he always had.

They all held up bottles and echoed his toast.

“Now I’ll propose a toast,” Will said, “and a Christmas prayer of thanks for Caroline in our lives, for Sophia becoming part of our family and for Ava. The four of us have been blessed by them.”

“Here, here and amen,” Ryan said and they clinked bottles together again.

In a few minutes Ryan raised his bottle high again. “Here’s to the two surviving bachelors in this group. Zach, my bro, I’m going to outlast you.”

All three of the others protested at the same time. “Ryan, you’re next,” Garrett said. “No way is anyone getting Zach down the aisle.”

“They can’t get him to stay in one country long enough to fall in love,” Will added, making Zach grin.

“Sorry, Ryan, but I’ll win this one,” he said, thinking about Emma.

They soon went to the kitchen where Zach got out ribs from a Dutch oven. All night he had cooked ribs and he had baked beans that had slowcooked for hours. He got a large bowl of Rosie’s cold potato salad. He replenished beers and they all gathered around the big table to feast on the rib dinner. As he passed out the beers, he thought of Emma. If she could see him now, she would know he enjoyed his family. They just weren’t together as often as hers.

“When are you leaving for Italy?” Will asked.

“Tomorrow. The weather prediction is good. So when is everyone else going?”

“We’re leaving tomorrow morning for Colorado,” Will replied. “Caroline is hyped over going and she is almost climbing the walls now,” he said, smiling at her and Caroline giggled.

“Garrett, when do you leave?”

“We’ll go to my folks’ house Thursday. We’re going out with Sophia’s friends Friday night.”

“Ryan, what about you?”

“I’m leaving to go back to Houston. I need to see if I still have a drilling business, I’ve been gone so long. Meg and I have parties Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday night. Meg’s a party girl.”

“Meg?” Zach asked. “Should I know who Meg is?”

“No. I can answer for him,” Will said. “Meg is just the most recent.” He grinned at Ryan. “You two are kids, still doing kid stuff,” Will teased.

“May be kid stuff, but it’s fun. At least I’m not so decrepit I have to sit around someone’s home each of those nights,” he teased.

“And Zach in Italy. Who is the latest beautiful lady?”

“I’ll be alone at my villa, which is fine.”

“Well, all of you should come to Colorado. This is going to be the best ever Christmas,” he said, smiling at Ava and then at Caroline. “We have a Santa suit for Muffy that Caroline thinks Muffy loves to wear. We’ll have worlds of fun and if anyone wants to come afterwards to ski and enjoy Colorado, you’re invited. Except our invalid.”

“Not an invalid any longer,” Zach said. “Doc’s given me a big okay and I can do whatever I want. We didn’t discuss skiing.”

“C’mon, Zach,” Ryan said. “Garrett, you, too. Let’s fly up there after Christmas and ski. I’ll come, Will, right after New Year’s if you’re staying that long.”

“Sure. All of you come join us. You can bring anyone you want with you.”

“I’ll see how it goes in Italy,” Zach said. “I doubt if I’ll be back that soon.”

“The bird has flown the coop again,” Will teased. “You just can’t stay put. We’ll see you next summer.”

“I’ll pass this time, but thanks,” Garrett said. “I’m building furniture and Sophia is painting.”

“Still the workaholic,” Ryan stated. “Some things never change.”

They ate ribs until they had a platter filled with bones. When they finished, they all cleaned up and soon they returned to the family room to open gifts.

The first gift went to Caroline and her eyes sparkled as she unwrapped a box that held a new doll. She gave Zach a hug and he smiled at her. “Merry Christmas, sweetie,” he said, wishing Emma was with him.

After the gifts were unwrapped and stacked neatly to go, Zach said he had something else for them.

He left and returned with a box holding the gold pocket watch, the Colt revolver and the Henry rifle. “My secretary and I have been through a lot of the memorabilia. I don’t know why these things were buried under the letters. So far, we found these three items. Why doesn’t each family take one. We can draw if you want to see who gets what, regarding this stuff.”

“You ought to have something,” Garrett said. “Leave me out. These are Delaney possessions and I’m not a Delaney.”

“Sophia is,” Zach said immediately. “There was a locket that I gave to my secretary. Sorry, I didn’t wait to ask you, Sophia, when I gave Emma the necklace. She has pored over this stuff and enjoyed it. You’d think these people were related to her.”

“That’s fine, Zach,” Sophia said. “Really. I don’t need it and it’s nice you gave it to her.”

“Sophia, you participate,” Zach said. “I’m staying out of it because all of you know I don’t care about the letters and the ancestors and our past. It’s history.”

“Our parents weren’t sentimental, and you’re really a chip off the old block,” Will said.

“Now that remark and comparison, I can do without.” Zach scribbled out words on three pieces of paper and wadded each up. “We can draw or you can each say what you want and see if anyone else wants it. Or we can go in order of age.”

“Hand us the papers and that will be that,” Will said.

Zach held out his hand and in seconds Will picked up the Henry rifle, Ryan the Colt revolver and Sophia the pocket watch. “Okay. Is everyone happy with what you got?” Zach asked.

“Sure,” Ryan said, rubbing his hand along the Colt. “This is excellent.”

“I love this watch—more than I would the rifle or the revolver,” Sophia said. “I would like one of the letters to put with it.”

“Good choice. I like the watch,” Garrett said, exchanging a smile with his wife.

“Go to the office and pick out whatever letters you want,” Zach instructed. “We can divide them all three ways when someone finishes going through them.”

“These things are treasures,” Ryan said, continuing to turn the revolver in his hand.

“The Henry rifle is fantastic. I’m definitely happy,” Will added.

It was late afternoon when Garrett stood. “We need to get home because we’re flying back to Dallas.”

Ryan stood and gathered his gifts. “I’ll go, too. Soon I’ll fly out for a tropical paradise, palm trees and warm breezes and a beautiful woman.”

“Won’t seem like Christmas,” Will said. “Of course, you may not care. I’ll bet you’ll be ready for snow-covered mountains before New Year’s.”

“Probably will,” Ryan replied cheerfully.

“You can bring your friend with you.”

Ryan winked. “I think I’ll come alone and see if I can find a new friend. See you in the summer, Zach, and thanks.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll let your drivers know you’re going.”

Zach saw them out, then returned to join Will and Ava while Caroline played with her new doll. “Want one more beer? You don’t have to go because they did.”

“Sure, I’ll have a beer. Is your foot hurting?”

“No. It’s healed,” Zach said, getting two beers from the bar.

“You don’t look so great. Anything worrying you?”

“No. Maybe you’re getting me mixed up with Ryan. He’s the one who’s always got a smile. Remember, I don’t have his rosy outlook on life. This is my natural look all the time.”

“I know that, but you aren’t usually as quiet as today and you look as if something’s on your mind besides Christmas and us.”

“Actually, Christmas hasn’t been on my mind, which I’m sure, surprises no one.”

“What do you think about the prospects for the Cowboys this next year?”

“Great,” Will answered and the talk shifted to football and then moved to business while they told each other what the current projects were.

When Ava and Will finally stood to go, he paused. “Will you come back from Italy or just go to a job site?”

“Probably just go to a site. I’m through here, so I’m dumping the letters and memorabilia. It’s up to you and Ryan now. Garrett, too, if you can rope him into it because of Sophia.”

“I’ll see. So you sent your secretary back to the Dallas office.”

“Yes. We won’t see each other again. She turned out to be efficient and good, Will. She’s read a mountain of old letters.”

“I don’t want to shred them. She’s right about a tie to our past.”

“With time they’ll disintegrate. She copied some of them carefully and put them in a scrapbook between clear acid-free sheets. She said that way we can make copies for family members who want them.”

“I’m astounded they got through our parents without being destroyed. You know Mom wouldn’t care at all about them. Dad didn’t until the end of his life.”

“Frankly, I can’t work up a lot of interest.”

Will chuckled. “So how did she get you to go home for Thanksgiving with her? Is there something going on here that I haven’t been told?”

“Will, don’t quiz your brother about his personal life,” Ava said, smiling at Will. “Caroline and I will say goodbye. The ribs were delicious and thank you for the gifts. You know we’ll all love everything.”

“Merry Christmas, Ava,” Zach said, walking her and Caroline outside. “Take care of him.”

“Merry Christmas, Zach. I intend to,” she answered and waited while he hugged Caroline before the two of them climbed into the limo to wait for Will.

“So how did your secretary get you to go home for Thanksgiving with her?” Will persisted.

“I think she’s trying to rescue me. You can’t imagine how sorry she feels for me and how much sympathy I get.”

“Sympathy.” The word burst from Will and he started laughing. “She feels sorry for you because you don’t celebrate these holidays. Does she know how you live and how much money you spend whooping it up on holidays?”

Zach grinned as he shook his head.

“So she made you go home with her for Thanksgiving. Now what in the world incentive did she use to get you to do that?”

“Mind your own business, Will. And the best possible incentive of all.”

“I never ever thought I’d see the day.”

“You haven’t seen it yet. Don’t worry, there isn’t anything serious between us and there won’t be. She is one hundred percent a homebody. I’m almost one hundred percent traveler. That’s not a good fit and we both know it.”

“Yeah, right,” Will said, smiling. “By the way, you didn’t tell me that she’s gorgeous. I know now why from the first you didn’t want me to get someone else to work for you.”

“She’s an efficient secretary.”

“With drop-dead looks. Well, merry Christmas,” Will said, impulsively hugging his brother. Startled Zach hugged Will in return.

“I think Caroline and Ava are changing you,” Zach said, stepping back. “It’s a good change, Will. None of us wanted to turn out to be like Dad.”

“Sure as hell not. He was as cold as ice until Caroline came along. She’ll never know how she has affected this family.”

“All for the better and you’re good for her.”

“I’m trying. Ava’s the one.”

“It’s you, too. Don’t sell yourself short,” he said following Will to the limo door. The driver held it. “Merry Christmas, Will. Thanks for my presents.”

Zach stepped back and watched as the driver closed the door and went around to get behind the wheel. He continued watching the limo go down the drive, but his thoughts were on Emma. Tomorrow he was scheduled to leave for a night in New York and then to Italy. Right now, he didn’t feel inclined to leave Texas. This was home more than Italy. He was comfortable here. He had to admit, he was a lot closer here to Emma than he would be in Italy. If he just had to see her, he could in only a few hours’ time. From Italy, it would be a real trek.

Jamming his hands into his pockets, he went back to the empty house. How could it seem so big and empty with Emma gone? What was she doing at this moment? Did she miss being with him?

Inside, he closed the front doors and heard the locks click in place. He stood in the entryway and debated whether to call her. It was pointless, so he went to the office, pausing beneath the mistletoe. He reached up to take down the decoration, turning it in his hands, remembering her kisses. Sex with Emma had been the best ever. Of all women, Emma was the only one who had created sparks the first moment they looked at each other. She definitely was the only one to include him in her family gatherings, the only one to make him rethink his past, the only one he had ever really missed.

With a sigh he tossed the mistletoe on a table. He didn’t expect her to be back at the ranch ever.

He didn’t want to go to New York tomorrow. He picked up his cell to tell his pilot they weren’t going until later in the week. He didn’t have to be anywhere at any specific time so there was no rush to leave Texas.

Tuesday afternoon he didn’t feel any more inclined to leave for New York and Italy than he had on Monday. Even without Emma, he would rather be at the ranch than in an empty house in Italy. He didn’t want to ruin his pilot’s Christmas, just because he didn’t care about his own, so he told his pilot he would stay in Texas until after the holiday. If he decided to go, he could catch a commercial flight. Or just go to New York and spend Christmas there.

Feeling glum, he reached for his phone to call Emma just to talk. How many times he had done that the past few days, and then decided he wouldn’t call her?

He was restless and nothing interested him. Emma occupied his thoughts most of his waking hours.

Startling him, he received a call on his cell phone. Shaking his head, he was tempted to not answer when he saw it was from Will. Afraid it would be an emergency, he said hello.

“Zach, it’s Will. Where are you? Italy or Texas?”

Zach swore and gritted his teeth. Will usually didn’t call until Christmas day. “I’m still in Texas, but will go to Italy soon.”

“I just thought you might still be in Texas. What’s wrong?” Will asked.

“There’s nothing wrong. Staying here is just easier.”

“Right,” Will said. “Could it be that you miss Emma? I imagine she invited you to spend Christmas with her family. You could, you know,” Will said without giving Zach time to answer his question.

“I am not spending Christmas with Emma and sixty other Hillmans.”

“So then pack and go to Italy. You’ll forget her and get over her.”

“Thanks. I plan to go to Italy. I’m just not in a rush,” he said, thinking he wasn’t going to get over Emma anytime soon.

“Well, I know it’s a safe bet you haven’t fallen in love, so I’ll stop worrying about you. You can still fly up here if you want. Caroline will take your mind off Emma. Caroline is having a blissful time. Christmas is magical for her and she’s turning it into magic for us.”

“That’s great, Will,” Zach said with sincerity.

“Even Muffy is enjoying the snow. We have to clear paths for her or she’ll sink out of sight. Give some thought to joining us.”

“Thanks. Bye, Will,” Zach said and ended the call without giving Will a chance to prolong it.

Zach returned to staring at smoldering logs in his fireplace while Emma filled his thoughts. Did she miss him or was she immersed in family Christmas activities? He held up his phone, tempted to call her, finally giving in to the temptation.

At first he thought she wasn’t going to answer, but then he heard her voice and his heart skipped beats.

“Zach, you’re calling from Italy?”

“I haven’t gone yet. I’m going to New York first,” he said. “Ready for Christmas?”

“Hardly, but I will be soon. Something’s always going on around here. People coming over or someone wanting me to do something or Mom needs help. I’m busier than ever. Have you heard from Will or Ryan?”

“Will today. They’re having a great time,” he said, longing to be with her. The phone call only made him miss her more and he felt ridiculous for calling. “I’ll have to admit, the place seems empty with you gone.”

There was a long silence. “I miss being there.”

“No, you don’t, really,” he said, smiling, certain she didn’t, but he hoped she missed him.

“I do miss you,” she said solemnly in a quiet voice that made his heart lurch. He inhaled deeply, wanting her with him, in his arms now.

“Will you go out with me for New Year’s Eve? I’ll come home if you will.”

There was another long pause and he held his breath. “Yes,” she said. “The sensible part of me says no and I’m sure you feel the same.”

“We’ll have a good time,” he said lightly, his heart racing with eagerness that he would see her again and go out with her. He settled back to talk, asking about her family, enjoying listening to her, glad for this tenuous connection that was still a link with her.

They talked for over an hour before Emma broke in. “Zach, my family is calling me. I promised I’d go shopping and they’re waiting for me to join them.”

“Sure. See you New Year’s,” he said.

The connection ended and he felt more alone than he had in years. He wanted Emma with him. How could she have taken such a place in his life that he couldn’t get along without her now?

New Year’s Eve seemed an eternity away. He stretched and walked around restlessly. He couldn’t concentrate on work. He didn’t want to go to Italy. He didn’t want to join Will because all he would do was think about Emma.

He left to head for his gym while he stayed lost in thought about her.

Emma hurried out to join her sisters and mother to spend the afternoon shopping, but the entire time, she couldn’t keep Zach out of mind. She was going out with him for New Year’s Eve. Surprise had been her first reaction. She was astounded he wanted to pursue a relationship. She had debated only a moment with herself. Now that she was carrying his baby, everything had changed. Whether she or Zach liked it or not, she would be tied to him for years. Unless he totally rejected his child and she didn’t think he would. Not when he seemed to care so much for his niece. She still couldn’t accept having a casual relationship with him, but she would just have to see how he reacted and what he wanted.

The aching gloom that had enveloped her when she parted with him had lifted, leaving only worry over his reaction to her news. Excitement, joy over the prospect of an evening with him was tinged with concern over when and how to break the news to him about their baby. If he rejected this child, he would break her heart. Even though he had rejected her lifestyle and hadn’t wanted her in his life permanently, this baby was more important now and life had changed.

By five in the afternoon, she was exhausted from shopping and wanted to go home and take a nap. She suspected her mother might be wearing down also, so she told Mary Kate she thought they should call it a day.

It was almost six before they actually unloaded the car and were settled back at home. Emma headed to her room, leaving her packages to get later. All she wanted to do was stretch out and get a quick snooze.

She hadn’t been in bed five minutes when there was a knock on her door and Mary Kate appeared.

“Can I talk to you a minute?” she asked, stepping into the bedroom and closing the door. She shook her dark brown hair away from her face as she crossed the room. Her tan sweater emphasized gold flecks in her hazel eyes.

“Sure, come in. Does Mom need help with dinner?”

“No, she’s lying down, too, and Sierra has gone home with her brood. So has Lynne to relieve Connor of watching their kids. They all promised to come back after a while.” Mary Kate sat on the edge of the bed.

“You’ve got all the energy,” Emma remarked.

“How are you feeling?”

“Tired. We did a lot of shopping and I guess the work I’ve been doing and the Christmas stuff has caught up with me. I’m sleepy.”

“Sure. You were sick this morning when I came.”

Emma sat up slightly. “Whatever it was, it passed.”

“You know I’m here for you,” Mary Kate said, her hazel eyes filled with concern and Emma took a deep breath.

“How did you know?” Emma asked, certain her sister had guessed she was pregnant.