Читать книгу I'll Be There For You - Kerry Barrett - Страница 15

Chapter 7

I didn’t feel amazing. I felt wretched. But I couldn’t let Louise pass up on such a brilliant opportunity. And it was only a couple of months, I kept telling myself, determined to have a look at some holiday deals for when it was all over.

For now, though, I had bigger things to worry about ‒ Esme’s baby group for a start. And the fact that with Fiona and Finn both showing signs that their magic was developing, I was going to have to fess up to Ez about my lack of powers and ‒ worse ‒ throw myself on her mercy and ask her to help. I felt sick at the thought. I was not the sort of person who enjoyed asking for help. Nor was I completely confident in Esme’s abilities. It wasn’t that long ago that I was giving her magic lessons, so to be dependent on her now made me uneasy.

It was another sunny spring day and I was walking with the twins in their double buggy to Esme’s house. She also lived by the river, but it was impossible to negotiate the muddy path with our gigantic pram, so I’d walked round by the road.

Esme and Jamie’s house was lovely, though quite small now they had Clemmie. Their pram was outside the front door and as I rang the doorbell I could hear Esme singing the wheels on the bus and Clemmie crying. I didn’t blame her. Esme was no SuBo.

She answered the door with a slightly tearstained Clemmie in her arms.

‘Ready?’ she said with a grin.

I shook my head.

‘Not really.’

Esme clipped Clemmie into the pushchair and handed her a chewy giraffe to gum, then she reached inside the front door and grabbed a raincoat I’d never seen before.

I narrowed my eyes at her.

‘Is that Boden?’ I asked as she pulled it on. I looked her up and down. She was wearing skinny jeans, ballet pumps, a Breton-striped T-shirt and now her Boden raincoat. It wasn’t her normal style at all.

‘Esme,’ I said, fighting laughter. ‘Are you wearing a uniform?’

Esme tossed her hair, she pushed Clemmie down the path and I followed with the twins who were shouting for Esme’s attention.

‘It’s just easier if I look like everyone else,’ she muttered. ‘Given that I’m not like everyone else.’

I felt sorry for her suddenly. She’d always struggled with being different, bless her. I embraced it, but she hid from it.

I patted her hand where it rested on Clemmie’s pushchair handle, her knuckles white with tension.

‘They’re a really nice bunch at the baby group,’ she said. ‘I think it’ll be nice for you to make friends. It’s so good to have other people who know what you’re going through.’

‘I’ve got Louise,’ I said. ‘And I’ve got you.’

‘I know,’ Esme said, she turned to look at me as we paused to cross the road. ‘But you’re not yourself at the moment and I don’t know why. I just thought getting out might help.’

We were walking past the gates of Inverleith Park as she spoke. I saw my chance.

‘Do we have time to just sit for five minutes?’ I asked.

Esme nodded, looking slightly nonplussed. But she didn’t argue as she followed me into the park and sat down next to me on a bench overlooking one of the ponds.

I could feel Esme watching me, but I stared straight ahead. It would be easier to say this if I couldn’t see her reaction.

‘I’ve lost my powers,’ I said in a rush. ‘They’re gone. Nada. Nil. Vanished.’

Esme didn’t say anything. She just took my hand. I started to cry.

‘And I’m so scared, Ez,’ I wailed. ‘So scared that we could lose the twins, and that I’ll lose the business and we’ll have no money, and I can’t tell Mum, because what would she think of me? And now the twins are starting to use magic and I can’t help them…’

Esme threw her arms round me and I sobbed into her shoulder.

‘Okay,’ she said, patting my back like she did to Clemmie when she got cross. ‘Okay. We’ll sort this out. I can help with the twins ‒ I can cover if they do anything at baby group for a start. We should definitely tell your mum and my mum. And it’s all going to be fine.’

She pulled back and looked at me.

‘You’ve got mascara on your chin,’ she said, smoothing down my hair.

I felt so much better for having told her that I didn’t care about how I looked.

‘Do you really think it’ll be okay?’ I asked.

Esme pulled some baby wipes out of her bag and handed them to me so I could wipe my face.

‘Of course,’ she said. ‘You’re the best witch I know.’

‘I’m the only witch you know,’ I pointed out. ‘Except for our mums.’ Esme wasn’t really one for mixing in the magical community.

‘I know plenty of witches,’ she said sniffily. ‘At least, I know of them. And you’re the best. Everyone knows about you, H. That talent can’t disappear overnight. We’ll get it back, mark my words.’

I blew my nose.

‘There’s a woman online,’ I said. ‘She says her friend had a similar problem, so I’m hoping she can help out.’

Esme nodded briskly.

‘Good,’ she said. ‘We’ll work out a plan. But for now, we need to get to baby group.’

She grinned at me, a gleam of mischief in her eyes,

‘If anyone’s in need of a shortcake biscuit and a cup of tea in a polystyrene cup, it’s you.’

I groaned, but I didn’t really mean it. I was fiercely independent and didn’t like relying on anyone, even Lou, but every now and then I lowered my defences and I was always pleasantly surprised by the result. Esme’s reaction had made me feel much better and I thought that an hour of inane chat about nappies and weaning could be just what I needed to take my mind off things.