Читать книгу Modern Romance September 2016 Books 1-4 - Кейт Хьюит - Страница 20
ОглавлениеTHE NEXT MORNING Bianca had woken to the sounds of the ocean and had blushed as she’d recalled how she’d behaved with such wanton abandon the previous afternoon, lying on the beach as waves had washed over them. What was more shocking and harder to deal with was the fact that she’d wanted Liev in a way that had been almost impossible to resist. Her whole body had been on fire with need. So much that she’d almost given in to him last night.
As the morning had passed they had made polite conversation and after a while Liev had gone for another swim, but this time she’d declined his offer. As she’d watched him go, the feeling that she was making a mistake, letting something special slip by, wouldn’t leave her. She began to question why she’d stopped him last night, why she’d denied herself something every nerve in her body had demanded.
She didn’t know that answer, didn’t want to know it either. All she did know was if he ever kissed her again she wouldn’t be able to stop. Every nerve in her body was on high alert, the simmering attraction she’d felt from the beginning now a desire-driven madness.
What was it about Liev? Could she really be in love with him? Had she found the same love Lucia had written about in her letter all those years ago? The words she’d read so many times came back to her, strangely fitting what she felt right now.
For is that not what love does? I would not change a moment of it, even though you are not entirely mine and I not entirely yours.
She was not Liev’s fiancée. She had no right to feel anything for him, let alone this strange emotion that felt painfully like love. That thought was knife-like in her heart because, right now, cameras were being set up and her make-up was about to be done and she would be going out to face everyone as Liev’s fiancée.
‘Are you ready?’ Liev joined her, his firm stance as he looked at her one that would not take no for an answer. At least once this was over and the visit to her grandfather done, they could finally go their separate ways. She was sure the shelter interview and this photoshoot would achieve much more than he’d originally demanded of the deal.
‘Ready,’ she lied, and she followed him out to the beach where the first shoot was planned. Posing so boldly for the camera was not something she was used to. She’d never invited the attentions of the press or magazines like this, which was probably why they’d instantly jumped at the chance.
The cameras clicked and Bianca posed, her body pressed close against Liev. Every move she made intensified the fire of awareness within her. All she could think about was that kiss yesterday, the one which had left her yearning for more, needing to know the joy of loving a man. Would that have happened if she hadn’t stopped things last night?
‘Have you set a date yet?’ the interviewer asked as they took the final shot. ‘And where will the wedding be? Here?’
Bianca blinked. She hadn’t rehearsed any answers to their questions. Yesterday’s moment of intimacy with Liev had completely thrown her off her usual organised course.
‘Nothing is set yet.’ Liev came to her rescue as he took her hand and lifted it to his lips. The camera she thought had been packed away clicked once more as she looked up at him. ‘We are enjoying being together for now, are we not, Bianca?’
‘That’s it. That’s the one.’ The photographer’s ecstatic voice hardly registered as she looked into Liev’s eyes. The icy grey had softened as desire blended within them. Desire she knew was echoed in her eyes, but it was the intensity of them, the potent power of that seductive look, which almost made her knees buckle.
He lowered his head and kissed her—slowly, lingering so sensuously she closed her eyes and gave herself up to the moment. Then it ended. He pulled away and a chill swirled around her despite the warm wind and afternoon sun.
‘Thank you,’ Liev said as he turned to shake hands with the interviewer, but Bianca just wanted them gone, wanted back the peace that had surrounded the small villa as they’d arrived.
* * *
The sun was low in the sky, but Liev didn’t feel the happiness he should feel as he stood and looked out over the ocean. The photoshoot had gone well. Bianca had been amazing, providing plenty of photos that could be used to show how much they were in love. She’d been so convincing he’d almost believed it too. But he’d been deceiving himself.
Try as he might, he couldn’t fight the attraction he had for Bianca. She had unlocked the man he could have been if his life had taken a different course, the man who wanted love and happiness, just as his parents had enjoyed before everything went spectacularly wrong. But he wasn’t that man any more and never could be again. One disastrous affair had seen to that.
‘It’s so peaceful here. You can almost forget the rest of the world exists,’ Bianca whispered as she joined him on the balcony, the warm evening breeze moving through her dark hair as he turned to look down at her. This was a much softer version of the woman he’d outbid at the auction for a bracelet. During the time they’d been together as a couple he’d fallen harder and harder for her, until he knew he couldn’t get enough of her.
What would she say if he told her he wanted to scoop her up and take her to the big bed he’d slept in alone last night and make her completely his? Would she welcome his touch, his kiss and his possession?
‘Thank you.’
‘For what?’ His thoughts were muddled as heat infused him at the image of her in his bed.
‘For bringing me here.’ Her voice had a delicate wobble and he clenched his hands into fists to prevent himself reaching for her, pulling her into his arms and kissing away that worry. ‘I know it’s for the benefit of the exclusive, but thank you.’
‘Is it true, that you have never spent time with a man like this, that you’ve never had a holiday romance?’ He was still getting his head round the fact that a woman as sexy and alluring as Bianca had never gone away with a man.
She blushed and looked down. ‘Yes.’
Now he couldn’t help himself. He reached out and lifted her chin, forcing her to look at him. Apprehension showed in her eyes as well as that ever-increasing vulnerability. Had he pushed her too far in his pursuit of revenge? ‘I’m sorry to have put you in this position. I never intended it to be this way.’
It had all been about keeping her from her latest trinket, but he suspected even that wasn’t the truth. Whatever was going on with the bracelet, she’d stood up to him, fought her battles hard and kept her side of the deal.
The gentle breeze moved her hair across her face as she looked up at him with an expression of innocence. Gently he pushed her hair back and tenderness squeezed at his chest. If only he wasn’t the heartless man life had made him, he knew he could love her.
‘I needed the bracelet,’ she said softly, her eyes searching his, but no trace of anger in her voice.
‘I know,’ he whispered, guilt pressing down on him.
‘You thought I was just being frivolous, buying myself jewellery?’ Her words, though barely above a whisper, still held the injustice of that. ‘It’s not like that at all.’
‘No, I don’t think it is. There are many things about you that I have got wrong, Bianca.’
‘Such as?’
‘I believed you were a cold woman. One who knew exactly what she wanted and went for it, but I was wrong. The woman I see now is someone completely different. She is soft and loving, loyal and innocent, making me want things I can’t have, things I don’t deserve.’
‘What things?’ The cracked whisper sent a lust-filled heat racing around him.
‘Affection.’ He meant love, but that was a word he’d thought he’d never use out loud again. Bianca had done something to him, touched a part of his heart that had frozen the day he’d buried his father and sworn revenge and later had been shattered by a woman’s betrayal.
‘Everyone deserves affection.’
‘I’ve done bad things, Bianca. I’m not the kind of man your grandfather would wish you to date, let alone become engaged to.’
‘You’ve blackmailed me, deceived my grandfather and all of New York’s society with our engagement and made me an accomplice in that deceit. What could be worse?’
If he told her of his past, about what had made him the man he was today, would it end this madness he was feeling? Would it stop the thoughts of making her truly his? Of course it would. A woman like Bianca Di Sione would want nothing to do with a criminal, even if his childhood record had been wiped away, as if those years in prison had never happened. But they had and he’d never forget them.
‘I am what I am today, cold and calculating, because I had to learn to survive on my own, to fend for myself and fight my own battles—literally.’ For a moment his mind raced back to those dark days on the streets of St Petersburg.
She reached up and touched his face, her palm soft against his skin, and he bit down hard to prevent himself from pulling her against him. She was seriously testing him. He caught her hand in his, her eyes widening with shock as he held her wrist. Her gaze held his, a hint of the strength he’d first seen in her coming forward.
‘I was in prison, Bianca—for five years.’
She gasped and the horrified look on her face told him all he needed to know. ‘What for?’ she asked, trepidation in those whispered words.
‘For trying to stay alive.’
‘I don’t understand.’
No, she wouldn’t. How could she when she’d never worried or wanted for anything? A protected princess.
‘After my parents died, I had no choice but to live rough on the streets of St Petersburg. I stole to eat and fought for a safe place to sleep. One day I was caught stealing bread and potatoes for myself and the younger kids.’ The embittered words snapped from him as he remembered the day he’d arrived at the prison, the hell of the place shaping who he now was.
‘That was the home you mentioned the other day? How old were you—when you went to prison?’
‘Thirteen.’
Why hadn’t she backed away? Why hadn’t she pulled herself free of him in disgust, knowing she could truthfully add thief to the charges she’d already laid on him? He let go of her and turned away, hardly able to bear the suspense of waiting for her to do just that. Why had he told her? He’d never let anyone know and had gone to great lengths to cover up that part of his past.
* * *
Bianca watched as Liev turned away from her. She should be glad. He was allowing her to walk away, but something held her there. This wasn’t like that night ten years ago when she’d overheard the bets being made by the boy at school she’d fallen in love with. He’d been betting on whether she’d sleep with him by the end of the prom. She’d been used and the humiliation of that had given her a resilience she’d never known.
She’d been used again, but this time she knew the facts. All of them, from his sad childhood to the reason he was blackmailing her today. The two inextricably linked. She knew this and now as she watched Liev standing alone and proud on the edge of the beach, she felt her heart melt and fill with love for him, for the child he’d been and the man he’d become.
The past few days she’d wanted nothing more than for Liev to kiss her. Deep down, on a level she’d never experienced before, she also knew that if he did so again, it wouldn’t stop there. There was no doubt in her mind that he was the man she’d been waiting for. They might not share a long-lasting love as she’d always dreamt it would be, but right now on this island they would be lovers.
‘None of that matters, Liev.’ She moved towards him and saw his shoulders stiffen and ached to touch him.
‘How can you say that?’ The gruffness of his voice told her he was struggling with his emotions as much as she was.
‘Because nothing matters. Nothing at all. Your past or mine. Not even the future.’ She reached out and touched her hand to his arm, felt the rigidness become more taut beneath her palm. ‘All that matters is this moment right now.’
He turned towards her, stroked his hand against her hair. ‘How can I have ever thought you were cold and emotionless?’
‘Everyone hides something, but I can’t hide from you any more. I want you to kiss me, Liev.’ A nervous flutter skittered in her stomach as she said the words. Would he want to kiss her if he knew how inexperienced she was? She’d never even kissed a man before him, not really kissed. That tantalising taste of what could be had left her wanting more.
‘Are you sure?’ His eyes darkened as his fingers tangled in her hair, bringing her closer to him.
She’d never been so sure of anything in her life. ‘I’ve been hiding for too long and tonight I want to change that.’
His eyes, dark and swirling with desire, searched hers, and then, so slowly the anticipation was almost unbearable, he lowered his head and kissed her, gently at first, but as she wrapped her arms around his neck, it became harder and more demanding. His fingers clutched her hair, holding her just where he needed her, and the flames of passion he’d been stirring since the moment they first met exploded into life.
‘You have no idea what you do to me, Bianca.’ He broke the kiss and looked at her, his fingers stroking her cheek, the tenderness of the touch almost unbearable. She felt his breathing, deep and uneven, as his chest rose and fell against her, sparking more desire.
Did he have any idea what he was doing to her? Did he know she wanted to cast aside her ten-year vow and allow herself to love a man, in every sense of the word—even if it was just for one night? She was under no illusions it would be more, but maybe, just maybe, love could change that.
‘Neither do I,’ she said, and a soft blush crept over her cheeks, but she had to tell him this was new to her. ‘I have never done this, Liev.’
He frowned. ‘Seduce a man?’
Was she seducing him? She had no idea how to. Embarrassment flooded her and she lowered her gaze. ‘Seduction is not something I’m well practised in.’
His hands moved to hold her arms and he held her gently away from him and looked at her, his expression hard and serious. ‘Is that so?’
Her heart was thumping hard as she waited for the rejection that would surely follow such a revelation. Inside she was eighteen again. Uncertainty filled her, almost dousing the flames of desire which were leaping inside her. The only difference was that this time she didn’t want to walk away, didn’t want to deny herself the chance of loving.
Slowly she nodded, too afraid her voice would fail her if she tried to say anything. Nervously she bit her lower lip and looked up at him, his hard expression almost unreadable. If he was going to push her away, she wished he’d just do it, instead of prolonging the agony.
His hands slid down her arms. Then he took her hand in his. Without saying anything, he led her from the garden, through the homely comfort of the living room to his bedroom. With every step her heart thumped in nervous anticipation. Never had she imagined the moment she would give herself completely to a man to be like this.
‘Liev,’ she whispered as he closed the door of his bedroom. The sound of the ocean lapping the sands was all she could hear other than her pounding heart.
‘Don’t say anything, Bianca.’ His voice almost broke with huskiness as he pulled her into his arms. ‘Just feel.’
She closed her eyes as his lips claimed hers, coaxing the flames of passion to rise once more. His hands skimmed down her sides to hold her hips, pulling her against him, proving he wanted her. She sighed into his mouth, revelling in the strength of his body. She didn’t want him to stop now. She was his—and maybe she had always been.
When he let go of her and stepped back, she swayed like a newly bloomed flower in the wind. She was light-headed and the throbbing heat his kiss had evoked was almost too much pleasure. All she wanted was to close her eyes again.
‘I feel as if my whole life has been waiting for this moment.’ His words were still husky and heavily accented. ‘And it will be special for you, I promise.’
She drew in a ragged breath as he looked at her, sizzling intent in his eyes. She wanted it to be special—for both of them. A time out of reality that could never be repeated. She wanted him, because he was the right man, the man she’d been waiting for, and alarming as it would be when she left the island and returned to her real life, he was the man she loved.
She took a deep breath, one born out of anticipation, and moved against him and placed her palms on his chest, feeling the strength beneath them. Slowly she raised herself on the tips of her toes and brushed her lips against his. If she had to feel the moment, so did he. As he responded, her fingers opened his shirt, with an ease which astounded her. She dropped back down off her toes and trailed her fingers through the dark hair which covered his chest, marvelling at its silky smoothness—and her boldness.
She pressed her lips against his skin, inhaling the intoxicating scent of the man she’d fallen in love with, committing it to memory. He lifted her chin, forcing her to look up at him.
‘Is this really what you want?’ Harshness had crept back into his words and his expression was stern, as if he was fighting for control.
‘Yes.’ She could hardly speak as her pulse seemed to be jumping in her throat. ‘But if you don’t...’
She didn’t manage to finish her sentence before he claimed her mouth in a hard and hungry kiss which took her breath completely away. She gave in to the desire which was throbbing within her, urging her on, and kissed him back as if her life depended on it. Maybe it did.
He moved against her, propelling her backwards towards the bed, each step becoming more urgent. He didn’t stop kissing her as they fell onto the bed, the soft white covers wrapping around them as their bodies entwined.
This was wild and so much more intense than she’d ever imagined. If this was how he kissed, really kissed, she didn’t think she’d survive being made love to. His lips, bruising and demanding, stoked the flames higher as his hands roamed over her body, the flimsy sundress little protection against the heat of his touch.
Her hands began exploring him, spreading over his back, relishing the strength and then moving under his open shirt and over his skin. She’d never touched a man this way, never been caressed like this, and didn’t want it to stop.
His fingers teased her hardened nipples and she gasped with the shock of pleasure which raced through her. He began to kiss her throat, moving lower and lower, and she lay there, eyes closed, enjoying the sensation of fire each kiss left behind. His fingers began to unfasten the small buttons on the front of her blue dress, but the same impatience she felt made him pull hard at the fabric until the buttons yielded and the dress tore.
She should have been horrified, but she didn’t care about that; all she wanted was to feel his touch on her breasts, his skin against hers. In response, she pushed his shirt from his shoulders, forcing him to briefly release her as he levered himself up, and virtually tore the shirt from him.
He paused and looked at her, his chest rising and falling rapidly with each desire-driven breath. ‘You are more beautiful than I could ever have imagined.’ Then with a wicked smile he removed his jeans, until he stood before her in black briefs which did little to conceal his hardened state of arousal.
She sat up and began to undo the remainder of her buttons. He placed one hand on the bed and leant towards her, the muscles in his arm firming as he did so, snagging her attention. ‘No more,’ he said gruffly. ‘That is for me to do, but first I need to take care of a practical issue.’
‘Practical?’ Her mind stumbled. What was he talking about?
‘The small issue of contraception.’
How had she forgotten that? What kind of idiot would he think she was? She watched him closely for any hint of shock at her brazen behaviour, but was more shocked when he opened his bedside drawer, took out his wallet and produced the necessary foil packet. Did he always keep his island home so prepared?
Before she had a chance to dwell on that, he’d wrapped his hands around her ankles, then slipped off her sandals, his grey eyes watching her intently. She blushed as his attention lowered, to her exposed breasts, and had to force herself to stay there beneath his scrutiny instead of giving in to the innocent urge for modesty.
He stroked his fingers up her legs, over her knees and under her dress and she was transfixed by the fire of need which raged in her. Just when she thought he was going to touch her intimately, he moved back, leaving her aching. But that ache was soon quenched as he moved over her, lowering his body onto hers as he claimed her lips in a kiss so wild and demanding she gasped aloud.
As if driven by her response, he slid his legs between hers and she could feel the heat and hardness of him. All she could think about was moving against him, finding a way, any way, to get closer, and she became irritated by her half-undressed state. She could feel his bare chest against her naked breasts, but it wasn’t enough. Nowhere near enough.
His hands moved down between their bodies as he lifted his weight from her and in seconds the remainder of the buttons were undone and her dress pushed away from her. Underwear was now the only barrier between them.
Giving in to an instinct that was new and exciting, she lifted one leg and with pointed toes trailed it up his leg. The growl of pleasure he gave emboldened her further and she moved her palms against his buttocks, pressing him against her until a string of muttered Russian words flew from his lips.
‘If you continue with this, I am not going to remember your inexperience and will lose all control.’ He looked down at her, his arms braced as he held his upper body above her, but still his erection pressed against her.
She smiled at him, liking the power over him she now had. ‘In that case.’ The taunt in her voice was clear as she wrapped her other leg around him, forcing him so close that if it wasn’t for their underwear she would be his.
The thought sent heat spiralling through her. She wanted this man to claim her, to take her most precious gift, because somehow she’d fallen in love with him. She had no idea when, but in their constant battles for control, she’d lost her heart to him. She was already his; no matter what happened now, she was his.
* * *
‘Bianca, have mercy on me.’ Surprised at the hoarseness of his voice, Liev claimed her lips once more in a kiss so mind-blowing he very nearly lost control right there and then. What was it about this woman that was so different from any other?
‘Never,’ she gasped as he pulled away from her and looked down at her, hair spread across the pillow and eyes closed in total abandon.
He moved down, trailing his fingers over her stomach until he reached the final physical barrier between them, and as he slid off the bed, he pulled her panties down those delicious legs that had caught his attention the first time he’d seen her. Now that demure and controlled woman was his, her passion so fierce it almost burned him.
She opened her eyes and looked at him, a nervous question in them. She was so beautiful it broke his heart. Did he have one to break? He’d always thought that it had been replaced by stone the day his life had changed.
He grabbed the foil packet he’d pulled out of his wallet earlier, removed his underwear and, with her eyes hungrily devouring him, rolled on the condom. He’d intended to take it slowly, to try to be mindful of her claim of inexperience, but as he covered her body with his, hers welcomed his so expertly he lost that final thread of control and thrust into her, deep and hard.
Her fingernails dug into his shoulders, and with her head pushed back deep into the pillow, she cried out in shock and pleasure. He stilled, the effort making his body shake. She was more than inexperienced. She was a virgin.
‘Don’t stop, Liev, please.’
She moved her hips, urging him to continue, and that final thread of control he’d been hanging on to snapped. He moved inside her, and as she wrapped her legs around him again, keeping him deep inside her, he was lost. Waves of pleasure, so big he thought he might drown, cascaded over him, and he knew this moment would change things. It would change him, change everything he’d been driven to do since he was a young boy.
She gasped his name as her release swept her away, dragging him with her until he lay over her, shaking in a way he’d never done before. All he could think about was that he’d taken her virginity, stolen it with his deceit and lies, because there was no way she would have surrendered such a precious gift if she’d known all he wanted was revenge on ICE, revenge that would destroy her brother too.
With his breathing still ragged and his body still humming, he moved off her, disgusted with himself. He’d taken a woman’s innocence in the name of revenge. What kind of man did that make him?
‘Liev?’ He heard her startled question as he strode to the bathroom, but he couldn’t look at her, not yet. She would see the anger and disgust blazing in his eyes and she didn’t deserve that. She didn’t deserve any of this.
* * *
Bianca heard the shower and lay there, unable to move. She wanted to run back to her room and hide from the anger she’d seen blazing in his eyes and the contempt as he’d glanced back at her.
Should she have told him, made it clear that she was totally inexperienced—a virgin?
What had she done to change things so drastically? The passion had been so intense her body had burned for his; now it was icy cold with shock and she realised she was shivering. Whatever was wrong, she wasn’t going to run and hide. Bianca Di Sione didn’t hide; she faced things head-on. Always had done and always would do.
She pulled the delicate and creased fabric of her dress together, buttoning it up and wishing her hands would stop shaking. When he came out of that bathroom, she was standing in front of the mirror brushing down her hair, smoothing away the just-tumbled-in-bed look.
Their eyes met in the mirror and she blinked at the image of him naked but for a skimpy white towel around his hips. The passion she’d just experienced flared to life again and she wondered if this was to be the moment they would go back to bed—if they were lovers.
‘You should have told me, Bianca.’ He looked at her in the mirror, those icy grey eyes full of regret. ‘You should have made it clear you were not just inexperienced. You should have said you were a virgin.’
Indignation rose, as did the need to protect herself, just as she’d done ten years ago. ‘And if I had?’
He walked over to her and stood before her, hardly caring about his state of undress. She looked up at him, trying to ignore the increasingly rushing pulse just from being so close to him.
‘You were a virgin and I am not your fiancé. Hell, I’m not even your lover.’ The softened features of his face she’d kissed just moments ago were now hard and set in fierce lines.
‘No, you are my blackmailer. You’re no better than Dominic. He’d placed bets with his friends at the school prom he’d take my virginity. Thankfully I’d found out, played him at his own game. But you stooped even lower.’
‘I would not have done that if I’d known.’ The anger in his voice was so clear it cut at her delicate heart, crushing it cruelly. ‘I made a mistake.’
She gasped. ‘Don’t say that.’ Why was he pushing her away?
‘It shouldn’t have happened, Bianca.’
‘Where does that leave us now, Liev? What happens now?’
He stalked across the room to stare out at the gardens bathed in light from the setting sun. ‘We leave tomorrow morning as planned.’
She wanted to go to him, to ask what she’d done, but her pride and ever-present need for survival kept her from doing that. Instead she stood with as much decorum as her crumpled dress would allow and lifted her chin in the defiant gesture she always did when life hurt.
‘We still have to visit my grandfather. That was part of the deal.’
‘Very well. You kept your side of the deal today at the photoshoot. I will honour that.’
