Читать книгу A Season of Love - Kim Watters - Страница 10
ОглавлениеChapter Two
What had Ethan been thinking? Holly needed money, not a manger scene inside a snow globe. The irony that they were both in the same position but for different reasons would have struck him as funny if things weren’t so complicated. Somehow, though, the action seemed right. For a moment, he saw behind her mask of exhaustion and fear and glimpsed the beautiful, caring, compassionate and vulnerable woman underneath.
The kind of woman Jared would fall for. He could, too, if that was what he wanted.
But wanting to protect her when he had to be part of her problem? Sure, he hadn’t been the cause of her financial woes, but deep down he knew that being behind in her bills bothered her and he felt like a cad. His mom would have never gone over there and asked for the back rent. As soon as he met Holly Stanwyck, he knew he wasn’t going to get it from her. Even if she did somehow come up with it, he wasn’t sure he would take it and hoped her idea for the holiday decorating service panned out because she needed money.
The woman also needed some divine intervention right now. He’d add her to his prayers tonight and ask his mother to do the same. Knowing Nan, though, Holly was already on the list.
He slammed his car door shut. As a career soldier forced out because of his injuries, he’d never make it in the civilian world if he didn’t toughen up. Right. He was just a big softy, regardless of which side he was on. He’d always had pieces of candy in his pocket for the Afghan children and biscuits for the stray dogs. Now he was opening a sanctuary for dogs to stay while their owners served on foreign soil and to help transport stray dogs adopted by servicemen overseas and reunite them stateside.
Head down to keep the lingering snowflakes from his eyes, and hands bunched inside his coat pockets, he headed toward home and the kennels in the enclosed porch of his house in town that he used as the temporary sanctuary. The permanent one was going to be at his family’s farmhouse outside of town, but it needed to be refurbished before he could take the dogs out there. He needed money to do that; some of it he’d hoped to get from Holly. Now he’d have to look elsewhere, since his disability checks barely covered anything.
The lemon scent of cleaner and varied barks greeted him when he walked through the double French doors off the back porch.
“How’d it go?” Meredith, his cousin and fellow board member of Beyond the Borders Dog Sanctuary, greeted him.
“As well as I suspected. There won’t be any funds coming from the store anytime soon.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. Holly’s such a nice woman. She’s just had a lot to deal with lately.”
Ethan didn’t bother to mention the incident with the garage door, seeing as he suspected Meredith was the one who had leaked the eviction information to the wrong person. He loved his cousin, but after being away so long, he’d forgotten her fondness for spreading gossip.
“Anything new with the little girl?” Ethan changed the subject. He didn’t want to think about Holly anymore, or the tangible energy that had made the short hairs on the back of his neck stand at attention when his hand grazed hers as he gave her the snow globe. Meredith sat inside the kennel, stroking the little black-and-white mutt’s head, and he saw the bandages covering both front legs where the dog had licked away all her fur.
“Pudding Cup will be fine. It’s just nerves. She misses her mom.”
“How about the big guy I brought in to Tim?” He’d found the injured stray mix huddled on the side of the road yesterday, and it reminded him of one of the dogs their patrol had rescued from the cruelty of an Afghan family. He couldn’t ignore the mutt and had thoughts about keeping him, despite the fact Ethan needed to stick to his mission statement. There were other shelters in the area that took in homeless and abandoned dogs.
“He’s going to be just fine. Tim thinks he’s found a home for him already, so he said not to worry about the bill.” Meredith was engaged to the local veterinarian, who also sat on the board and was willing to take care of any of their animals for cost.
“I’ll have to stop by and thank him.” And make sure the animal was going to a good home. Okay, so he was a sucker for dogs and kids and apparently widows behind on their rent.
Ethan rubbed his hand across his stubbly chin. “Anything else?”
“Yep.” Meredith rose to her feet, causing Pudding Cup to whimper and follow her to the gate. “Another stray is being shipped over from Afghanistan, courtesy of your buddy Phil, along with the other one. Duggan and Jasper arrive Saturday, as do two more dogs on Wednesday. Their owners ship out next Friday.”
“Great.” Ethan wiped the snowflake residue from his face. His six temporary accommodations were more than full. With four more dogs coming in, he would be over capacity at seven, even though the two from Afghanistan would only be temporary until he could reunite them with their owners, who’d arrived home from their tour of duty last month. He could spill out into his living room, but he’d be over the limit and need a kennel license that much sooner. “Where am I going to put them?”
“Whose brilliant idea was it to provide a home for displaced animals when their owners left?”
“Mine, and you know it’s a good one. It’s one less thing for our local service men and women to think about while they’re doing their tour. Most are fortunate to have family to take care of them, but not all.” Ethan had started his studies to be a lay minister and had often counseled some of the enlisted men when the need arose. Leaving their pets behind ranked pretty high up there behind family, especially when they had to dump their companion in a shelter.
Being distracted could get a person killed. He knew that firsthand.
He stared at the nubs on his hand and tried to feel the forgiveness. The emotion refused to come. Five people died that day, and he wrestled with the guilt. Despite the fact he was assigned to protect the chaplain, he felt a responsibility to everyone he traveled with. He should have seen the IED. He knew the signs to look for. A strange vehicle on the side of the road, the wink of light reflecting off the camera lens set up to film the incident, the uneasy feeling harbored inside his gut because of the delay in getting the convoy started.
But he’d been distracted.
None of that mattered now.
What mattered as he stared at his scars and searched for forgiveness was that God had a plan for him. And it revolved around the sanctuary and taking care of man’s best friend.
“You’re just a bleeding-heart softy. That’s what I love about you.” Meredith gave him a hug. “I’ll take Pudding Cup with me. I like the little girl, and Tim says it’s no problem for me to drop her off at his office during the day. I think she’ll recover quicker from her abandonment issues, so that frees up one kennel and then you’ll have enough.”
“Thanks. I appreciate that.” For what seemed the first time that day, he smiled. Meredith was more like a sister than a cousin, and with a job in sales and marketing, she was an invaluable part of the team he’d selected for the board. He’d also asked her fiancé, Tim, and his mom because she owned the property that would house the permanent sanctuary. He should find one other person, to make the numbers odd in case they needed a tiebreaker, and he had yet to find someone with accounting experience so he could concentrate on the dogs and managing the sanctuary.
Things had happened so quickly. He’d probably gone about this the wrong way by accepting animals before he was ready, but the alternative would have been for his first resident, Sadie, to end up in the pound. It would work out. God’s plan had been revealed to him during those long hours in the hospital and continued to be revealed daily.
Pudding Cup treated him to a good licking when he bent and scratched her behind her ears. Bear, the black Lab who had alerted him to yesterday’s graffiti artists, whined and pawed at the metal fencing of his kennel, begging for attention. “I’ll be right there, boy.” His gaze scoured the cramped area again. “I need money to expand and move everything out to the farm.”
“Keep praying. It’ll happen. We’ll get the grant money and more private funding. You’ll see.” Meredith picked up Pudding Cup and squeezed her gently. “Oh, there’s one other thing.” By the hesitant smile registered on her lips, Ethan knew he wasn’t going to like the next words out of his cousin’s mouth. “We’re also getting a ferret. Seems like one of the dogs arriving Saturday thinks it’s her baby. I told Private Smith it would be okay.”
“But we agreed this would be strictly dogs. It’s called Beyond the Borders Dog Sanctuary.”
Meredith crossed her arms over her chest and stared at him darkly. “Then change it to Beyond the Borders Animal Sanctuary. As a member of the board, I have the right to speak up, as well. How can you break up a family? What kind of peace of mind would our soldier get if he didn’t know both his pets were safe while he was away? I suspect we’ll be getting calls for cats soon, too.”
Ethan shoved his hand through his hair. “No. Absolutely not. No cats.”
“We’ll see about that.” She gave him a dark look. “Just because you have a personal issue with the cute, cuddly creatures doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have the same consideration as dogs. They are all God’s creatures.”
“I’m well aware of that. I’m okay with cats. I just don’t understand them. They need to go elsewhere. I’m having enough trouble raising the money and supplies for dogs.” His cousin’s scowl grew. Half Irish with red hair to match, Meredith was a force to be reckoned with when she was angry. “I’m not going to win this argument, am I?”
She shook her head. “They make medicine for that, you know. I’ll make a cat lover out of you yet. I’ve gotta run, but I’ll be back after dinner to help you walk them and transition Bear and Sadie for the night. You really need to get some volunteers in here, though, when the other dogs arrive.”
“I’ll work on it.” Another item to add to his list of things to do for the shelter that grew longer, not shorter, with each passing day. And now to complicate things, he had a whole separate issue to think about.
Holly Stanwyck refused to budge from his mind.
* * *
Shadows from the early-morning sun stretched across the road in front of them as Holly drove to the other side of town Saturday morning. The digital clock in her car read 7:57 a.m. and she still had ten minutes to go according to Ethan’s directions. Holly disliked being late. The scheduled 7:45 departure time shouldn’t have been an issue, since she was an early riser. Too bad her son had other ideas. Holly had let him sleep as long as possible, but he still looked wiped out from the week, disgruntled and a bit dejected. He’d given her a hard time about getting up.
Instead of going to the early church service tomorrow, they’d catch the later one. Not that she really wanted to go, but she had to, for Cam’s sake. It hadn’t worked these past few months, but maybe being in the Lord’s house would straighten him out since she hadn’t been able to get through to him. She glanced sideways at her son and caught the scowl underneath the perfected look of boredom. Nothing seemed to have remained from his childhood, and her heart ached at the thought of how things used to be before Jared died.
So much had changed since the accident. Especially the past year.
Holly tried to lighten the mood inside her old Honda. “Mindy’s manning the shop today.” The high-school student worked for her part-time because Holly couldn’t work seven days a week, keep sane and keep Cameron out of trouble, which apparently wasn’t working very well. She couldn’t really afford the student, but Holly hated asking her friends to continually pitch in. “I need to stop in and check on a few things, but any ideas on what you’d like to do after we finish at Mr. Pellegrino’s house?”
“I wanna ride the quad again.” He folded his arms across his chest and glared at her.
“You know we don’t have them anymore.” To help pay their medical bills, she’d sold both ATVs after Jared died.
“That’s what I want to do. Patrick tells me they have two. You can let me go home with him after we’re finished.”
“You know that’s not going to happen. Besides, we don’t even know if they’re coming today to help. They never responded to my phone call.” Her fingers gripped the steering wheel a little harder as she turned the corner and merged with the rest of the local and tourist vehicles heading through the downtown area. She couldn’t imagine not communicating with another parent had the roles been reversed. But then again, she had no idea what was going on inside Patrick’s home, and she had never met his parents.
Silence accompanied them the last five minutes to Ethan’s house, where he waited for them outside by the garage with a can of paint and painting supplies. Arms crossed, he paced the small cement area in front of the 1960s-style single-story brick ranch house.
“Good morning.” Holly spoke as soon as she exited the car. Too bad her inability to get her bearings had nothing to do with the sudden movement and everything to do with the man in the old T-shirt underneath his worn camouflage jacket and faded jeans. He still wore the same compassionate look he’d had inside her shop the other day, but underneath she sensed his uncertainty and awkwardness that probably stemmed from his injury in Afghanistan.
“Good morning.” His gaze swept over her fleece-lined jacket and then back to her face, making her feel a bit self-conscious. A half smile broke the tension. “I’m glad you’re here.”
Heat consumed her cheeks. “Sorry we’re late. I should have called. I would never back out on a promise or commitment. We just had a hard time getting out of the house this morning.” She glanced around the driveway, not surprised to see her car the sole vehicle. “I take it Patrick isn’t here?”
“Not yet.”
“Then he probably won’t show. I was only able to leave a message for his parents, and they never called back.” Sorrow and a touch of anger burrowed into her heart. From what she’d gleaned from Cam’s conversation the night of the incident, the idea had been Patrick’s and so had the spray paint, but her son was just as guilty for going along with the plan.
“That’s not your problem. I should have contacted them myself. Ready? After Cameron removes the graffiti, it shouldn’t take that long to paint, but we may have to do two coats. We should be finished by eleven. If you need to leave earlier, I can drop Cameron off at the store.”
“We? I thought this was Cameron’s job.”
“It is.” Ethan rubbed his chin with the back of his hand, drawing her gaze along with it. “But I somehow feel responsible. If my cousin hadn’t mentioned my hastily spoken words—about evicting the tenant because of the back rent—to her best friend, the busybody of Dynamite Creek, your son wouldn’t have heard it from his classmate.”
She looked at the black spray paint on the light brown wooden door. Holly nodded. “I see. Look, I understand your position. You need someone in there who can pay the rent, and being behind usually results in eviction. I get that. Now, as for the door, you’re right, it would go much quicker if we all helped, especially because you haven’t seen Cam paint yet.” She glanced back at her car. Her son still sat hunched in the front seat. “Today, Cameron. The sooner you get started, the sooner you get finished.”
Cam sulked as he stepped from the passenger seat and shuffled toward them. The preteen residing in his body screamed attitude. Holly needed to get a handle on him before he towered above her with his next growth spurt.
Ethan gave Cameron a pair of black work gloves. “Here, put these on.”
“For painting?”
“You’re going to remove the spray paint first. I doubt the paint for the garage door will cover the black markings very well.” After kneeling down, Ethan wedged the yellow bottle with red lettering into the crook of his arm and used his good hand to open the top.
“What’s that?” Cameron yanked on the gloves.
“It’s supposed to remove the graffiti.” Ethan poured some liquid onto a rag, set the bottle down, stood and then handed the cloth to Cam. “Just start rubbing the painted areas. It should come off.”
“Me?”
“Of course.” He winked at Holly, making her heart flutter until she tamped down on the emotion. Despite the two years that had passed since his death, her heart belonged to Jared.
“You’re the one who did it. I’m here to supervise, not do the job for you. Your mom, either. Just be careful you don’t get it on your skin or clothes.” Folding his arms over his chest, Ethan stepped back.
What? she mouthed, raising her eyebrows and tilting her head to the side. Ethan put a finger to his lips and motioned for her to take a few steps back.
Once they were out of hearing distance, he leaned close to her ear, the warmth of his breath creating havoc with her breathing. “We’ll help with the painting. This part is a lesson the boy needs to learn for himself.”
“Sounds like you have experience,” Holly replied softly as she inched away, needing to distance herself.
“I do. I wasn’t exactly a choirboy in my youth.” A fraction of a smile tugged at his lips, and his gaze slipped back to her son begrudgingly rubbing the saturated cloth over the paint.
“Really. What did you do?”
“Pretty much the same thing. I tagged a neighbor’s garage door because he was old and crotchety. Back then, I didn’t get to use any sort of remover. I had to sand the area first, apply a primer and then four coats of paint. Took nearly the whole weekend.”
“Did you learn your lesson?”
“That was just one of many.”
And yet it looked as if Ethan had managed to turn his life around, go into the service and almost die for his country. Her gaze flickered to his injured hand again and wondered if it still hurt and how he managed to do the day-to-day stuff that required two sets of fingers, but she was too polite to ask. Besides, that would mean opening up her heart again to the possibilities of establishing some sort of friendship or relationship with him, and that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.
“This stuff smells like your nail-polish remover, Mom, but it really works. Look. The paint is almost all gone.” Cam broke into her thoughts, dragging them back to the garage door. A slight stain still clung to the beige paint, but it was much less noticeable now. She breathed a sigh of relief, realizing they wouldn’t be there all day as she’d anticipated.
“Pretty much. Now you need to rinse the residue off. Then while it’s drying I’ll show you around.”
“Show us around?” Cam dropped the cloth on the newspaper protecting the driveway and yanked off the gloves.
“I’m opening a sanctuary for dogs while their owners are overseas.”
“Dogs? Really? I wish we had a dog, not a stupid, silly cat.”
Holly heard the criticism and hurt spew from Cam’s lips. Her mouth opened and shut quickly as the blood now drained from her cheeks. Any words she could even think to say caught in her throat as she stared at her son and gulped for air. The person standing next to Ethan bore little resemblance to the sweet, innocent boy she remembered.
“Your dad brought Figaro home.” That was all Holly managed to say. Pain ate through her heart again, and tears hovered behind her eyelids. How could she explain to her son that the cat was more than just a cat? Figaro was another link to the past she’d shared with Jared, just as Cam was.
Ethan broke the uneasy silence. “Cats are wonderful creatures and just one of God’s many creations, Cameron. Pets come in all shapes, sizes and colors. The same as people. God made us all unique. He loves us all the same, despite our differences.”
Holly squirmed at Ethan’s mention of God. Of course, she should expect no less from a chaplain’s assistant, but it made her uncomfortable, especially since she went through the motions for Cam’s sake but didn’t really believe or love the way she was supposed to.
“I want a dog that can play fetch.”
Ethan caught the defiant look the boy threw at his mother, and a subtle change hovered in the air between them. Clouds drifted in front of the sun, blocking out its temporary warmth, and the wind kicked up a notch, intensifying the clang of the wind chime on the front porch of his neighbor’s house. Holly’s soft gasp met his ears as her light floral fragrance drifted under his nose. Her stricken expression told him more than any words she could speak. The tagging incident aside, the boy was headed for trouble if there wasn’t some kind of intervention.
He liked kids, had a special rapport with them. He’d started training as a lay minister after he joined the military, where he had high hopes of saving the world. He hadn’t. Instead, five people had paid the ultimate price. But this wasn’t about him, the pastor or the two soldiers and civilians with God now. Saving the entire world was His job. Opening the dog sanctuary and maybe helping a troubled boy find the right path in life was something Ethan could handle. Maybe. It was the least he could do for Jared. For Holly.
A thought struck him as he turned on the spigot, yanked the hose to the garage door and then passed it off to Cameron. Ethan knew he should check with Holly first, but he had only so much time to get through to the boy. “I have a solution.”
“What?” Both she and Cameron spoke at the same time.
“I need a volunteer or two to work at the dog sanctuary. Cameron can come after school. He’ll stay out of trouble, I’ll get some much-needed help and the dogs will have someone to play with. He could ride the bus here after school. What do you think?”
“Really?”
“Really. Why play with one dog when you can play with several?” Encouraged by the hope blazing in the boy’s eyes, Ethan shot a look at Holly and saw her cross her arms and draw her lips tight.
“Can I, Mom?”
“What about his homework?”
Ethan understood this was about more than just homework. She’d already lost her husband; this was about her son’s safety. Despite his being her landlord, she didn’t know him from any other stranger in town. He’d reassure her while Cameron rinsed off the door.
A strand of hair had fallen free from her ponytail and accentuated the curve of her jawline. Her soft lips graced him with a tentative smile, and her green eyes made him think of his childhood and rolling in cool, thick grass on a hot summer day. Ethan almost forgot why he stood in front of his garage. Almost. He pulled his gaze from her and refocused back on the boy and safer territory. Something about Holly brought out his protective side that, despite what had happened in Afghanistan, was a part of him that refused to go away. And that extended to her son, too.
“I’ll make sure he gets his homework done.”
“And how will he get home afterward?”
“I’ll drive him there.”
“I don’t know...” Holly felt the weight of two pairs of eyes staring at her. This twist threw another item she had to deal with into her already-crowded mind. Pressure simmered underneath the surface.
“Please, Mom?” Cam begged her.
“Rinse off the door and give me a moment.”
Holly should have realized her son wanted a dog. She did know that she couldn’t handle the added expense or the time commitment, although the idea of helping out at the shelter was brilliant. Had her monetary worries removed her that far from her son’s life? Had she been so focused on getting through each day that she had lost touch with what was the most important to her?
Yes.
Holly didn’t like the answer that popped into her head. She didn’t understand her son anymore. Jared would have told her to take her troubles to the Lord. Easier said than done. Holly blamed Him for taking her husband away from her.
Cameron quickly squirted the water onto the door and washed away the paint residue and chemicals. Then he handed the hose back to Ethan. “I’ll get my homework done. I won’t get into any trouble and I won’t ask for a dog again. Please?”
Put like that, how could she say no? Easily. Her alternatives, though, were wondering how to keep Cameron away from Patrick or dealing with her son’s sulking expression in the store after school. It would make him happy, settle the issue of Patrick and help Ethan out at the same time. In a way, she owed it to her landlord for letting her stay in the shop until after Christmas.
She still had to deal with the fact that she didn’t even know Ethan that well. But he had to be good. He was a Christian, retired from the military and had once been Jared’s friend. Plus he was Nan Emrey’s son, and she’d never had any issues or concerns with the older woman. Her gut told her it would be okay, but it wouldn’t hurt to ask around about him tomorrow just in case. She could always change her mind if necessary.
“Fine. We’ll try it out for a week. I’ll pick him up, though, after I close the shop. Now shake on the deal and...” Holly turned to face Ethan, the last of her words garbled in her throat. Blood pooled in her cheeks.
This time Ethan had no problem putting out his hand as if almost daring Cameron to touch it.
“What happened to you, Mr. Pellegrino?” Cameron’s eyes widened as he stared at Ethan’s hand. His own hovered in the space around his head.
A muffled silence filled the space until Holly’s strangled voice cut into it. “Cameron. Where are your manners?” Yet she’d asked the same question days earlier.
“Does it hurt?”
“Cameron Jared Stanwyck. Enough.” Holly clenched her fists.
Ethan ignored her outburst and leaned toward her son. “Not so much anymore, but when the cold seeps in, it does bother me somewhat.”
Flexing his thumb, the only remaining digit on his hand, Ethan stretched it toward Cameron. “Go ahead. You can touch it.” He gave her a no-nonsense expression. “I’ve found talking about it instead of ignoring it helps.”
When his gaze caught hers, Holly had a hard time remembering her name. His startling blue eyes had turned into deep, mysterious pools of uncharted waters, challenging her. She fought to gain control over her emotions. What was happening to her?
“Feels weird. How do you write and stuff like that?”
Holly’s gaze remained averted, but she sensed Ethan’s attention shift to her son. “I’m relearning that, or I do it with my left hand. It hasn’t been easy, but I’ve discovered you can teach an old dog a new trick. Speaking of which, come on. I bet Bear is just waiting to learn something new today.”
“Bear?”
“A black Lab that’s going to be here for at least a year. He loves to play fetch with an old tennis ball. The temporary sanctuary’s in the house until I can move it to the family farm outside of town.”
When Cam ran ahead of them, Ethan faced Holly again and held out his injured hand. “Here. Your turn. We may as well get this out of the way, since I’m guessing I’ll be seeing a lot of you when you pick Cameron up.”
Seeing each other? Holly had no plans on that. She would make sure that Cameron waited for her outside.
“Holly?”
Blinking, she forced her thoughts back to the present. She inhaled sharply. She’d tried to keep from staring earlier, but her gaze had kept returning to his injured hand. She was curious. But to touch it?
Swallowing, Holly reached out. She stopped short. It seemed too intimate a gesture for someone she hardly knew, despite the fact Ethan and Jared had gone to school together. “I’m really not comfortable with this.”
“And I’m not going to be comfortable with the idea of seeing the questions in your eyes all the time.”
“But—”
“It looks worse than it really is, but I understand.” Ethan shrugged and stared at his hand as he withdrew. “It does take getting used to.”
“I’m sorry, Ethan.”
Holly felt his pain again behind his mask of indifference, confirming there was more going on inside him than he let on. The bomb had taken more than just his fingers and five lives. It left behind a shell of a man, struggling to deal with everyday life. He suffered the survivor’s guilt that ate away at the soul like a moth devoured clothing.
Holly wore it every day like a piece of her wardrobe.
She should have never insisted that she and Jared attend the Chamber of Commerce function when the weather forecaster had predicted the cold snap that would turn the melted snow into ice. But how was she to know in that brief moment she took her eyes from the road that the argument would be their last?
