Читать книгу The Mirror Maze. Almost a chess novella - - Страница 4

How boastful and self-satisfied I was just recently! I am calm. I am satisfied. We are ready. Ugh! Who would have thought that this little spot on my skin could change everything? My face and hands have long been covered with such spots of various shapes and shades, but today my new doctor decided to scare me. He was staring at yet another mole with such a concerned face. His whole expression said, “This is bad. Very bad. I am concerned.” The dermatoscopy lasted an entire hour! At the end, the doctor asked if I use sunscreen regularly. That’s hilarious! I am ninety years old. I wear sunglasses; without them, my eyes water. But I’m not going to smear anything on myself. Never have!

This doctor is just a stupid boy! It’s a pity that everyone I trusted has already died. This young man thinks that the sunscreen will save him from age spots and death at the same time? I swear, he was almost glad I didn’t use that damn sunscreen. As though he understands everything now. Reason has been found successfully. “Wait for the examination results.”

Fine. I’ll wait. But what good will that do? I was sure that I was going to forget everything as soon as I walked out of his office. And that’s exactly what happened. I couldn’t care less about the results. I’m not afraid of death. There are worse things. What about guilt? Guilt before humanity?

Noah was just building an ark. He didn’t lock people and animals in cages before the time was right. He believed he was saving all life on Earth. I also believed. Only now we are not getting out of the ark…

Two weeks. The answer will come by email. I have to do this. I must examine all the results and allow myself to conclude: was our Project a mistake? That’s what really scares me! I don’t want to think about that anymore; I need to leave. That’s easier said than done. It was chilly in the clinic; all the heat is out here. There’s a bench in the shade, but it’s thirty metres away. How slowly it’s approaching. My shirt is sticking to me like glue, burning my skin. It’s getting harder to breathe. My walking stick treacherously slips out of my sweaty palm, making me fall hard on my bony bottom. I hope everything ends as soon as possible. The heat, sweat, and chills. And this embarrassing weakness. Did the boy really manage to scare me? No, it’s just the heat. I need to find a taxi. I’m just 5 minutes away from home. I typically enjoy walking, but not today… There is a car just two minutes away. I need a break.

Where is the taxi? I’m freezing. My watch is showing six o’clock. I don’t understand; what have I been doing all this time? Doesn’t matter. Here is the nearest taxi. Got in the car. Asked the driver to drop me off at the cafe. Sitting on that cursed bench, I dreamt of getting home as soon as possible. To lie down and sleep. But now I wanted to delay my return, like a prisoner on a walk. I sat down on the terrace and ordered my favourite tea with honey. Its scent of mint soothed me.

I saw a girl in the opposite corner of the terrace feeding sparrows. Her pale skin glistening in the midsummer light was the unmistakable symbol of “our” people. I suddenly wanted to do something nice for her. But what exactly? Buy her sunscreen? She doesn’t need it. She doesn’t go out in the sun. And evidently she doesn’t need croissants either. She just tossed crumbs to the noisy flock as soon as they began to chirp. But still, there has to be something… Her complexion resembles a magnolia at dusk. It’s almost as if she’s asking to be put onto a canvas. Crazy idea, but maybe that’s exactly how I will find out what that flower needs?