Читать книгу Redeeming The Billionaire Seal - Lauren Canan - Страница 10

Three

Chance froze as a flare of heat once again surged to his groin. He cleared his throat and tried to weigh the question. He’d been around the men in his platoon too long. They all tended to break the tension and stress by intentionally putting the wrong connotation on something another said. This was Holly. Especially after what just happened, it was better to be safe.

“Is what hard?”

“What you do. For a living. Being a SEAL.” She looked down at her hands, fiddling with a piece of straw. “I know you guys are the best, but even then, sometimes... Sometimes bad things happen. Like...what happened to Jason. I know you were hurt. Wade told me. I hear about an accident in Iraq or Afghanistan, like a chopper going down or our men being killed by some hidden bomb, and it’s all I can do to take another breath. I know what it’s like to get that phone call from a near hysterical wife who is calling to tell you your brother—her husband and the father of their baby—is dead. I can’t imagine what it must be like on the other side. To actually see someone killed or badly injured.”

He felt her struggle to not break down.

“After Jason... It became so real. It was no longer just a news report that happened to someone else. They could be talking about you. I pretty much held my breath every time they announced another casualty or bombing involving our guys, only relaxing when Wade didn’t call to tell me anything after a few days.”

That surprised him. He’d never considered that Holly would follow the news reports from that part of the world out of concern for him. He sensed she needed to know more than she’d probably been told. “It’s a job, Holly. One that needs doing. I try not to think any further than that. I trust my team. I know they’ve got my back and in return they have confidence in me and we get it done. Sometimes bad things happen. But that’s true wherever you are, whatever you’re doing.” They all prepared for that moment; they all knew the next breath could be their last, especially in SEALs. But he refrained from saying that out loud.

She was quiet for a long time.

“I wanted to write to you.” She shrugged. “Especially after Jason was killed. Wade offered an address.” She shook her head. “I was afraid I would say something that might cause you to lose your focus.”

“Nah. You should write. I’d enjoy hearing from you.”

She looked up at him. “Really?”

“Well, yeah.”

She settled back against the board wall and he felt her relax. One of the horses nickered; another answered.

“The horses are always ready to go. Night or day. I love their spirit. So eager to be saddled and taken on an adventure. I think they enjoy it as much as the riders do.”

“I would have to say you’re right. The biggest problem I used to encounter was holding them back when they wanted to tear ass and run.”

“Do you think you can still do it?”

Chance had to get a grip on this. There were so many ways this question could go.

“Do what?”

“Ride a horse.” This time she looked over at him, frowning. “What did you think I meant?”

He shrugged and hoped she would let it go. Distraction was the key. “Hell, yeah, I can still ride. It’s like a bicycle. Once you learn...”

“Isn’t that what they say about sex?” she asked. “I suppose it fits both scenarios.”

Sex? Did she bring that up on purpose? He glanced over and saw the look of pure innocence on her face. Nah. “What do you know about sex anyway?” It was out before he could stop it.

The cool look she gave him didn’t require words. But she answered anyway.

“Really. Are you honestly going there?” A look of disbelief covered her fine features. Her mouth was open in awe. Again. “Chance, I’m twenty-four years old and a year shy of being a doctor. I probably know more about sex than you do.”

He absolutely refused to take up that challenge. “I didn’t mean it that way.”

“What way did you mean it? That I’m just a dumb little girl who never left the farm?”

“Your intelligence has never been questioned. I know you’re smart,” he murmured, adjusting his jeans in the most unnoticeable way he could. “You always have been.”

“Okay. Well, that kinda narrows the options.”

Chance didn’t like where this conversation was going. He didn’t want to think about Holly in another man’s arms let alone his bed. Hell. It was none of his business. Holly was an adult and she could date whom she wanted. But he still didn’t like it. Those bullets had done more than knock out his knee and shoulder. Apparently they had severely screwed with his head.

“Who is your boyfriend? Maybe I know him.” Safe subject.

“Don’t have one. Once the clinic caught on, I barely had time to breathe. That’s when we hired Jolie to run the office, take the calls, set up the appointments.”

“You said Kevin Grady is the co-owner?”

She nodded.

“I remember him. Red hair? Thick glasses?”

“Yeah.” She nodded and smiled. “You should see his kids! Anyway, he has the experience but couldn’t handle the workload by himself. I had the land and the old house that was left to me when Aunt Ida died. And that old masonry building sitting empty. So we formed a partnership. So far it’s working. There are two high school boys who work weekends and evenings, cleaning and caring for the boarded animals. Even then it’s still hectic at times. Right now we are all struggling to learn the new computer system.”

“You’ll get there. Look at how much you’ve accomplished already.”

“I guess. I owe a lot to your brothers. They fronted the money for the equipment. We’re making payments but I’ll be so glad when I’ve paid them back.

“Hell, I doubt if they’re worried about it.”

“So when are we going to saddle a couple of horses?”

Chance hesitated. In actuality, he wasn’t so sure he could still swing up into a saddle. His right knee was still healing. It was mended enough that he could hide the tendency to limp. And the left knee took the brunt of the weight when he put his foot in a stirrup. Maybe he could manage without doing any more damage. “I don’t know. I think Wade is expecting me to spend some time in Dallas but that probably won’t be until next week.”

She let her head fall back against the wooden wall and grinned like a cat that had just found the key to the milk vault.

“What?”

“I have something I want to show you while you’re here. Something I’ve recently gotten into. I’ll bet if you give it a try it will have you flat on your back and begging for mercy in about eight seconds.”

Mother of God. He wasn’t going to ask. He. Would. Not. Ask.

“Aren’t you going to ask what it is?”

“No.”

“You sound grumpy again.” Her eyes narrowed as she gave him the once-over. “You must be really tired. I know you’ve experienced a lot of emotions today. I’ll wait until you get your strength back and show you. Give you a live demonstration. It’s easier than trying to describe it anyway. I guarantee you’re going to think I’ve gone absolutely wild-child crazy. But I love it. You get into this rhythm and feel all that power beneath you, pushing you up and slamming you down, and know you control it...ah man, there’s nothing like it.”

He pinched his eyes closed and took a deep breath. He could feel her looking at him. For the life of him, he didn’t know how to tactfully respond.

“Can we change the subject?” He cleared his throat. Why had he ever decided to come to the barn?

“Sure. Are you in pain?”

“No.” Yes. But not in a way he could do anything about at the moment.

She nudged his arm playfully. “What do you want to talk about?”

He hadn’t found one safe topic of conversation so far and he was quickly running out of ideas. When he’d thought about coming back to the ranch to recuperate, he hadn’t envisioned this. He hadn’t considered how Holly would have grown and matured into someone he would love to know better. A lot better. And thoughts like that wouldn’t cut it. He needed to clamp down on his wayward thinking and he needed to start right now.

“How about on Sunday we grab a couple of horses and disappear for a while? I’ll tell Wade we will go into Dallas later in the week. I’d like to see how things have changed on the ranch.”

“That sounds great.” She yawned. “Maybe then I can show you my new passion.”

He let his head bounce against the back wall. Goddamn. This was so messed up. He needed a smoke. Or a beer. Or both. The last time he’d seen Holly she’d been a child. For some reason she’d taken to him and he’d not been able to stop her from following him around the ranch, first with her brother there, then the few times when he wasn’t. She’d been too young to take a hint and he wasn’t about to hurt the feelings of a little ten-year-old by telling her to get lost and leave him alone. She had persisted and not only had he begun to enjoy her presence, he’d missed her when she wasn’t around.

She’d been a cute kid, smart, never hesitating to speak her mind and not caring if she insulted someone in the process. He’d respected that. Especially in one so young. It was just over fifteen miles between her home and the school, so hanging out with her friends and classmates had rarely been an option for her, even after she’d joined 4-H. He’d definitely been like a second big brother. That status forever changed the second he’d stepped inside her clinic earlier tonight.

He felt Holly snuggle into his shoulder, her hand falling across his waist. It wasn’t long before the sounds of the night were the only things he heard. He leaned farther back against the board wall, scooting down in the hay, absently smoothing his hand over her long silky hair.

How many times over the past ten years had he sat for hours against a stone wall, his senses alert to any sound out of the ordinary? The desert air had been dry, dusty, with a smell like something was rotting, the nights cold, the landscape harsh. In his mind he’d always walked through the plan of attack they would carry out just before sunrise, going over it in detail time after time. Recently, though, images of this ranch had pushed strategic preparations out of his head. The lush green pastures, the smiling faces. And sometimes he’d begun to wish he could come home to exactly this, although he hadn’t really envisioned Holly snuggled in his arms. But that made it even better.

He had to question what was changing inside to make him start thinking of home after twelve years. Twelve years next month. At that time he would sign up for another three-year stretch if the medical evaluation board didn’t determine he was out of the military forever.

Chance heard footsteps and looked up to find Wade walking in his direction. The smile on his face and a slight shake of his head said he wasn’t surprised to find Holly asleep in his brother’s arms.

“Just checking,” he said in a lowered voice. “You both okay?”

“Yeah. I was just about to walk her home.”

Chance stood up, then gathered Holly into his arms. She weighed next to nothing. A couple of tentative steps told him his knee could do it.

“Her house is behind the clinic a few yards. There’s a path and light. You’ll see it. It was her aunt’s old house, if you remember.”

“Thanks.”

Walking to the front of the barn, Chance stepped out into the semidarkness. Holly had tucked herself into his arm, her head resting on his shoulder. He could feel her soft breath against his neck. When the smell of berries infused the night air, it was intoxicating. She was intoxicating.

A sudden sense of being home wrapped around him like a heavy fog. He could see only the road beneath his boots and the gentle face of the woman who slept in his arms. Drawing a deep breath, he inhaled the familiar smells of the ranch and heard the sounds of nature that stirred in his mind memories he’d carried since forever. He felt uplifted, although exactly what caused it, he didn’t know. For the first time since he was wounded—maybe further back than that—he didn’t feel the restlessness that speared him on each and every day. He felt at peace.

Stepping off the gravel road onto a well-worn path, he heard the water running in the stream seconds before he felt the cooler temperature inside the tree line. He smelled the rich, raw earth. Then he heard the hollow sound of his footsteps as he crossed the wooden footbridge that had existed long before he’d discovered it. He skirted the clinic, and with one last glance down at Holly, he stepped up onto the small patio of her home and opened the door.

If the woman watching TV in Holly’s house thought it strange to see a man step inside with Holly in his arms, she hid it well.

“And you are?”

“Chance Masters. And Holly is fine. Just asleep.”

“That way.” The woman pointed to her left. “Down the hall on the right.”

“Thanks.”

He laid Holly on her bed, pulled off her shoes and covered her with the blanket. He had to get a grip on this. Fast. Less than twenty-four hours back on the ranch and he was putting her to bed and fighting the desire to climb in with her.

Holly was a beautiful temptation. But Chance knew it would be unethical to come on to her, especially when his future was not set in stone. Some women were in it for the sex and were okay with no promises of forever. When he disappeared on a mission, the women he dated just found someone else. He couldn’t see Holly in that light. She was as special now as she’d ever been and she would expect more from him. Maybe a lot more than he could give.

He needed to find something that would guarantee that distance was maintained between them. With every breath Holly reminded him he was a man. Every muscle in his body tightened, making him throb with painful need. The vision of Holly beneath him, the delicate features of her face glowing in mindless captivation of their sexual joining, her eyes locked to his as he moved inside her.

He had to stop it. Now.

But even so, the innocence of their friendship was forever gone. Whether a good thing or bad, there would be no going back to the way they were.