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Chapter 6.

Fifteen dollars and forty-nine cents

DESPITE THE UNPLEASANT PROSPECT OF having to wear yesterday’s socks, Ruby was in a good mood and was eager to get up and dressed, long before her school day began. She was surprised to see her morning drink (one third grapefruit, one third cranberry, one third peach – with a straw) sitting waiting for her. How did that Hitch guy know what she drank for breakfast? What’s more, where did he get the straws from?

So mind reading is what they teach them in butler school.

The morning paper was lying on the countertop and Ruby glanced at the headlines.

Mayor wages war on garbage: ‘Litter bugs are trash’ says Mayor Abrahams

Good as Gold: five tons of gold bullion to be deposited in Twinford City Bank vaults

Heaven Scent: Twinford National Blossom Day set to be the most spectacular since records began

Hitch had obviously been to some all night supermarket because the countertop was covered in a vast array of breakfast possibilities.

‘That’s some butler,’ muttered Ruby, as she set about pouring Choco Puffles into a paper bowl. Out of habit she rummaged in the pack to find the free gift : it was a brain teaser puzzle consisting of five shapes which when arranged correctly would make a perfect square. Ruby did it in six and a half seconds. She threw the paper bowl into the trash bag and stood listening for sounds of life. There was no sign of Hitch, and her parents weren’t up yet, so she gave Bug his breakfast and went out to patch her bike tyre – but miraculously it was already fixed.

‘Boy! That’s some butler,’ muttered Ruby again.

‘Thanks.’

Ruby looked up to see the amused face of Hitch. He looked kind of pleased with himself, which irritated her.

‘So what’s wrong with your arm?’ said Ruby

‘I’m sorry?’

‘What’s wrong with your arm?’

‘I’m surprised you noticed.’ And he was surprised too; he thought he had concealed his arm injury well.

‘I notice things, I’m good at that.’

‘I guess you are,’ he said.

‘So what happened?’

‘Just a touch of housemaid’s elbow – I need to lay off the dusting.’

‘Oh yeah, housemaid’s elbow, that well known complaint.’

Stuffing her notebook into her bag, Ruby whistled to Bug, got on her bike and cycled off towards the centre of Twinford, her dog running along side. All the way there she tried to remember exactly what the mystery caller had said.

‘…Do you notice everything Ruby Red?’

‘…A little bird told me… that you are capable of noticing the smallest things, the tiny details… I bet you can see when something is plum square in the wrong place, while everyone else just walks on by.’

Bug had no trouble keeping up with her and in no time they had reached Chatter-Bird Square. She was pretty sure she was right about Chatter-Bird Square – there wasn’t a Plum Square in Twinford, at least not one that Ruby knew about and in any case Chatter-Bird fitted with the clue, ‘a little bird told me’. She looked around her. There was nothing obvious to be noticed – but then that was the point wasn’t it?

‘The smallest things…’

Look for something tiny, Ruby. That could take all day. The square, in fact a park, was big and would soon be teeming with people on their way to work.

‘…people walking on by…’

Bug had wandered off. He was busy going from tree to tree sniffing and doing what dogs do. Ruby watched him snuffling along the ground, making his way over to the tree in the middle where the footpaths met. He had spotted a brown paper bag on the ground under the tree and was busy trying to get whatever was inside it, out.

‘Geez Bug, do you have to eat everything? You just had breakfast a half hour ago.’

Ruby went over and picked up the bag and out fell three squishy plums.

Kinda weird to find plums at this time of year, thought Ruby. And then she looked up at the tree and down at the fruit and she remembered what the voice had said. This was a plum tree and it was in the middle of the square.

Plum in the middle of the square…

…where… everyone just walks on by…

She walked right up to the tree and then walked around it and then she saw it, something red.

‘Do you notice everything ruby red?’

The voice had not been saying her name, it had been telling her to look for something red. The something red was a price sticker – it had Joe’s Supermart printed across the top and a price, $15.49, printed in the middle.

Is this the clue or is this just a price sticker?

She looked at it some more.

If it’s a clue then I guess I’m meant to go to Joe’s Supermart – but fifteen dollars and forty-nine cents? I’m meant to go in there and find something for fifteen dollars and forty-nine cents? I bet there’s nothing in Joe’s Supermart for fifteen dollars and forty-nine cents. No one who had fifteen dollars and forty-nine cents would shop there.

The dog looked at her stupidly – he didn’t know what was going on but he wouldn’t mind doing something else. Ruby was taking no notice though – she was just staring at the little sticker. After a couple of minutes of silent staring she got back on her bike and headed off towards school.

When she got to the crossroads in the middle of Bird Street she called over her shoulder, ‘OK Bug, time to go home.’ The dog looked at her, disappointed, but he knew what to do and he took a left and Ruby cycled on up the hill. She would be early for once.

As soon as she arrived at Twinford Junior High she went to look for Clancy. He was there already of course – overly punctual was his style.

‘Hey, what happened to you?’ he asked. ‘You sorta look like a truck ran over you and then decided to reverse.’

‘Yeah well, I didn’t get too much sleep on account of someone stole my bed,’ replied Ruby

‘Someone stole your bed?’ said Clancy, his mouth open like a fish.

‘Yeah, and that wasn’t all they took.’

‘What do you mean?’ said Clancy, flapping his arms.

‘We don’t have a single piece of furniture left,’ said Ruby dramatically.

‘You got burgled?’ mouthed Clancy.

‘I guess you could call it that – though it looks more like we moved house, but no one bothered to tell us where we were moving to.’

‘They took everything?’ said Clancy his eyes widening.

‘Everything except the phones,’ said Ruby. ‘By the way, thanks for your call buster.’

‘What call? I didn’t call,’ said Clancy. ‘My dad grounded me, wouldn’t let me call, so I didn’t.’

‘No, I noticed,’ said Ruby. ‘But someone did, I tell you I got some super strange telephonic activity last night.’

‘You did?’ said Clancy. ‘What kinda super strange, weird strange or creepy strange?’

‘It’s hard to say,’ said Ruby. ‘One was a hang-up and the other was this gravelly voiced woman.’

‘Like the woman in A Date with Fate ?’ asked Clancy.

‘Sorta,’ said Ruby. A Date with Fate was a show that had been running for years; each week some mildly creepy ghost story was introduced by this old actress with this raspy voice – the stories tended to be a little lame.

‘What did she say?’

‘It’s hard to explain exactly – some kinda code.’

‘You crack it?’

‘Not yet, but listen, before that this kinda chiselled guy turns up at our house and says he’s the house manager my mom requested, only of course my mom being my mom is calling him a butler.’

‘You got a butler! Wow,’ said Clancy impressed, even though his family had never been without one his whole entire life. ‘What’s he like?’

‘A total airhead,’ said Ruby.

‘That doesn’t sound good,’ said Clancy. ‘You don’t want an airhead butler.’

‘Well, technically he’s not a butler, he’s a household manager – whatever that means.’

Clancy whistled. ‘Mrs Digby’s not gonna like that!’

‘Yeah well luckily she’s with her cousin Emily right now, but you’re right – she’s bound to notice there’s something a little off about this guy.’

‘How dya mean – off?’

Ruby paused for effect. ‘I think there’s something sorta strange about him.’

‘Like what for example?’ said Clancy, unable to keep the thrill out of his voice.

‘He seems to know too much. Things he couldn’t know – well, not unless he was psychic or something.’

‘So where did he come from?’ asked Clancy – he was on the edge of his seat or at least would have been had he been sitting down.

‘London, supposedly, but who really knows,’ replied Ruby.

‘He’s English?’

‘No, just been living there – the people he used to work for have ‘suddenly’ gone off riding elephants for three years.’ Ruby loved getting Clancy all wired about the possibility of some dark mystery.

‘Perhaps he stole their money and did away with them,’ he said earnestly.

‘Well that might explain the flashy car – he’s got this silver convertible, but I am not sure it explains the arm injury.’

‘The arm injury? You’ve got an injured butler? You don’t want an injured butler. He’s really injured?’

‘Oh yes,’ nodded Ruby. ‘He looks like he was involved in some kinda accident.’

‘Or shoot out!’ whispered Clancy conspiratorially. ‘You know what Rube, I’ll bet he’s not even a butler – he’s almost certainly a hit man or something.’

‘You’ve got some imagination Clance my old pal!’

But she didn’t tell him the thought had crossed her mind.

Ruby wasn’t one to get in trouble unnecessarily, but she was finding it hard to concentrate and several times during class it was noted that she wasn’t paying attention. The thing was she just couldn’t put it together – what was the significance of fifteen dollars and forty-nine cents?

After lunch it came to her – she couldn’t believe she had been so stupid, it was the most simple kind of clue, the staring you in the face kind. So obvious you missed it. As Ruby all too often remarked, PEOPLE OFTEN MISS THE DOWNRIGHT OBVIOUS {RULE 18}.

It was Mr Walford who got her to see it. He used to be in the military and liked to be precise about things. He was a stickler for using the 24 hour clock.

‘Redfort, Ruby,’ he barked. ‘It is precisely 13:31, recess is no longer in progress, march your way swiftly to class, please.’

Ruby stopped in her tracks, paused, and then suddenly turned to Mr Walford. ‘3:49pm! Of course! Not fifteen dollars and forty-nine cents but fifteen hundred hours and forty-nine minutes – or put another way, eleven minutes to four.’

The price sticker is telling me to be at Joe’s Supermart at 3.49pm.

Mr Walford looked at her as if she was a complete crazy but that didn’t matter, nothing mattered… oh, except for the school basketball tournament, scheduled to begin at sixteen hundred hours.

Darn it, Del is going to kill me.

Ruby would be sorely missed if she didn’t show. Del’s team, the Deliverers, were playing Vapona Begwell’s team, known as the Vaporizers, and there was always a lot of rivalry. Del Lasco would not forgive her unless she had a good excuse, and even then, she still might not.

Inspiration came during afternoon recess when Ruby dramatically faked a foot injury – everyone saw as she tripped down the outside steps. A stuntman couldn’t have done a better job.

‘Jeepers! My toe, I think I just broke my little toe.’

Ruby knew that toes get broken all the time and that they don’t necessarily require a trip to the emergency room. More often than not one is simply told to ice it. She had no trouble convincing anyone that she wasn’t going to be playing basketball anytime soon – Ruby was an accomplished actress.

‘Too bad Ruby, we’re really gonna miss you,’ said Del, kicking furiously at a weed. This was no lie, Ruby Redfort would be missed because what she might lack in height she made up for in skill. She had the amazing knack of distracting the opposition and scoring before they knew that they had even lost possession of the ball.

‘Yeah Del, I know, I’m sorry,’ said Ruby, wincing as she hobbled towards the medical room.

Mrs Greenford the school nurse couldn’t get either of Ruby’s parents on the phone, unsurprising since some time ago Ruby had changed their contact details in the school files. The numbers now sent any member of the staff to an answerphone with the reassuring message, ‘if Ruby should need to come home early today, I am around, please pop her in a cab.’ (Ruby could do a flawless impression of her mother.) This way, if ever she wanted to pull a stunt like this, her parents would not be informed.

Ruby limped off to the taxi.

‘So I’m to take you to Cedarwood Drive?’ said the cab driver.

‘Nah, change of plan – Joe’s Supermart on Amster,’ said Ruby.

The driver gave her a knowing look and nodded. ‘Yeah, I was a kid once – don’t worry, my lips are sealed, sweetheart.’