Читать книгу Family Drama 4 E-Book Bundle - Leah Fleming - Страница 31

On Sunday, Pearl stood on Brighton beach, gazing at the scene in wonderment. Even the pebbles under her feet held fascination as she picked her way across them, stooping to pick up one after another as she studied the colours and strata, just as Miss Rosen had taught her to do at the orphanage.

Moving closer to the foaming waves, Pearl stood transfixed as they ebbed and flowed. She stepped forward, jumping back like a delighted child when the next wave tumbled in, almost soaking her shoes. She laughed, turning to look at Derek as he lumbered down to her side, face red from the whipping wind.

‘Have you had enough now, love? We’ve been on the beach for an hour and I don’t know about you, but I could do with some grub.’

‘Just five more minutes,’ she begged.

‘All right, and I’m glad to see you’re looking better.’

‘It must have been something I ate, but my tummy’s fine now.’

Pearl looked up at the sky, saw gulls soaring, wings silhouetted against the dark clouds, their plaintive cries echoing in the bleak seascape. Rain began to fall, and reluctantly she dragged her eyes away, trying to hold it all in her memory. Head down, she stooped again to pick up a shell, fascinated by the texture and colour. ‘Oh, Derek, isn’t this lovely?’

‘Yeah, if you say so, but you’re getting soaked. I think we should find some shelter.’

Pearl slipped the small shell into her pocket, her heart once again going out to this lovely man. He looked so wet, miserable, his expression hangdog. All right, he wasn’t much to look at, but nowadays she hardly noticed. Instead it was his personality that shone through, and suddenly she knew without a doubt that she really did want to marry him.

Pearl grabbed his hand, smiling widely. ‘All right, come on then. Food it is.’

They scrambled across the beach, Pearl throwing a last look over her shoulder before they headed for the nearest café. She shivered as they entered the warmth, the smell of food suddenly making her stomach turn. Mo had insisted she have a huge breakfast before she left, but she’d been unable to eat more than a few mouthfuls before being sick. Now once again she felt queasy.

When the waitress came to their side, Derek ordered roast lamb, but Pearl shook her head. ‘Just a cup of tea for me, please.’

‘You need more than that,’ Derek said, looking at her with concern.

‘I had a big breakfast,’ she lied. ‘Honestly, I’m not hungry.’

He shook his head doubtfully, but said no more, and as his meal was put him front of him, Pearl looked away as he ate. The clouds thickened, rain teeming down and beating against the widows of the small café as though trying to gain admittance.

‘I reckon we’ll have to make our way home,’ Derek said as he finished his meal and sipped his tea. ‘I can’t see the weather brightening up.’

Pearl didn’t mind. She had seen the sea, it was etched into her memory, and once again her fingers itched to paint. Derek paid for the meal and, head down against the driving rain and wind, they hurried to the railway station.

In the waiting room, a small fire burned in the hearth and they made for the nearest bench, hands in pockets as they huddled inside their coats. Fortunately they didn’t have long to wait for a train back to London, the carriage empty as they climbed inside. As they sat down, Derek put his arm around her and Pearl sank against him, the smell of his damp clothes assailing her nostrils.

‘Shame about the weather, but at least you’ve seen the sea now.’

‘Yes, and it was wonderful,’ Pearl said. She yawned, her eyes closed, and then she knew no more until they arrived at Clapham Junction.

‘Wake up, sleepy head, we’re home.’

Pearl opened her eyes, for a moment bewildered, and then realising that she had slept for the whole journey, she stumbled to her feet. ‘Oh, Derek, I’m so sorry.’

‘Don’t be daft, love. I think working the tables on your own in the café must be wearing you out.’

Derek took her arm as she alighted from the carriage, but as her feet touched the platform, she swayed.

‘I don’t think this is just tiredness, Pearl. I think you’ve caught a chill or something. Come on, let’s get you home.’

She knew Derek was right, but as the only waitress in the café they’d be in a terrible fix without her. Maybe Mo would have a couple of aspirins or something, and if she went straight to bed, she’d be all right in the morning.

Pearl did feel better the next morning, and though she couldn’t face food, she felt strong enough to go to work.

The breakfast rush was almost over when a woman came into the café, Bernie greeting her. ‘Hello, Madge, long time no see. How are you?’

‘I’m fine, and I’ve come about the job.’

‘Blimey, are you sure?’

‘Yeah, I’ve had enough of working evenings and weekends.’

‘Right, you’d better have a word with Dolly.’

Bernie went to the kitchen, whilst Pearl surreptitiously studied the woman. She looked to be in her mid-to-late forties, her eyes small, but bright. With short, coarse brown hair and a thin face, she reminded Pearl somewhat of a fierce terrier dog.

Dolly came bustling out of the kitchen, a smile on her face. ‘Madge, nice to see you. Bernie tells me that you’re looking for a job.’

‘That’s right.’

‘After being a silver service waitress, it’ll be a bit of a comedown.’

‘All the functions are in the evening or at weekends. My boys are grown up now and I’d rather do day work.’

‘What about the money? I can’t pay you what you’re used to.’

‘With two of my lads at work, they’re stumping up their keep. I don’t mind taking a drop in wages.’

‘Well, if you’re sure, Madge, the job’s yours. It’ll be nice to have you working here.’

‘Smashing, and if you like I’ll start straight away.’

‘With only one waitress, it’d be a godsend.’ Dolly turned, beckoning Pearl to her side. ‘This is Madge Harding, my cousin.’

‘Hello,’ Pearl said shyly.

‘Nice to meet you, love. Perhaps you could show me the ropes?’

‘I’d be pleased to.’

‘Right, I’ll leave you to it,’ Dolly said brusquely. ‘I’ve still got Gertie and Mo working for me, and once the tables are cleared we’ll have a gossip over a cup of tea.’

As soon as Dolly was out of sight, Madge turned to Pearl again. ‘How do we split the tables?’

‘We split them in half, one section at this end, and the other nearest the kitchen.’

‘Well, as I’m the last in, I suppose I’ll be doing this end.’

‘Er … well, no, not if you don’t want to.’

‘Bless you, love, I don’t mind. In fact it’s only fair. Now, what else do I need to know?’

Pearl told Madge all she could think of, both women working happily together as they cleared the tables. Despite her fierce demeanour, Madge turned out to be a friendly soul, and when they took the stacks of crockery out to the kitchen, both Gertie and Mo greeted her with delight.

Dolly told Pearl to fetch them each a cup of tea, and when she returned it was to hear Madge saying, ‘That Pearl seems a nice girl, but where on earth did you find her? She talks like she’s got a plum in her mouth and certainly doesn’t come from these parts.’

‘As she’s right behind you, why don’t you ask her yourself?’ Gertie chuckled.

‘Gawd, sorry, ducks,’ Madge said, her face red as she turned. ‘Well, at least I wasn’t running you down. I’m a nosy old biddy and must admit I’m curious about where you hail from.’

‘I was brought up in an orphanage in Surrey.’

‘You poor kid. Don’t you know who your parents are?’

‘No. I was left on the steps.’

‘Christ, that’s awful. So you haven’t any family at all?’

‘None that I know of.’

‘Where do you live now?’

‘I have a room in Mo’s house.’

‘Yeah, and she’s fast becoming one of the family. Her and my Emma are now as thick as thieves.’

‘That’s nice,’ Madge said. ‘What about you, Gertie? How are you doing these days?’

‘I ain’t too bad, but my stomach still plays me up now and again.’

Dolly spoke, her voice sharp. ‘You and Mo are both Mrs Neverwells. You’re never out of that doctor’s surgery and he must be sick of the sight of the pair of you.’

‘Now then, Dolly, don’t exaggerate,’ Gertie protested.

‘I ain’t, but enough gossip for now. You can get on with that washing-up, and you, Mo, get back to the vegetables.’

Madge winked at Pearl, the two of them going back to the dining room. ‘I see Dolly’s as bossy as ever. I know we’re related, but she still scares the shit out of me.’

‘And me,’ Bernie called, ‘but if you don’t want her to hear you, you’d best keep your voice down, Madge.’

The woman’s head shot round, eyeing the kitchen door with fear, whilst both Pearl and Bernie broke out into laughter.

‘Only kidding,’ Bernie spluttered.

‘Oh, you bugger,’ Madge said, but she soon joined in the laugher. ‘Well,’ she said, wiping eyes, which were wet with mirth, ‘at least it’s going to be all right working with you two.’

Pearl placed the tray of cups on the counter, deciding that she already liked Madge, and though she’d miss the extra money in her wage packet, she was glad that the woman had applied for the job.

Madge turned out to be a comic and often had Pearl helpless with laughter. As a local she knew many of the costermongers, giving them as good as she got in light-hearted fun.

Nearly two weeks had passed, and the only problem was Pearl’s continuing ill health. It was becoming a real concern.

When she got up on Friday morning she was once again feeling nauseous, and as she sat opposite Mo at the breakfast table, her food uneaten, the woman eyed her thoughtfully. She then dropped the bombshell.

‘Pearl, have you … well … have you been with Derek?’

‘Been with him? What do you mean?’

‘Er … have you slept with him?’

‘No, of course not.’

‘Blimey, that’s a relief, and I’m sorry for being suspicious. I thought with you being sick in the mornings that you might be pregnant.’

Pearl’s face stretched in surprise. ‘Pregnant! You think I’m having a baby?’

‘No, not now you’ve told me that haven’t slept with Derek. I’m sorry, love, I should have known better. You’re a good girl, but as I said, with you being sick and all …’

Pearl stared at Mo, her eyes transfixed with shock. She couldn’t be – she just couldn’t … Yes, she had missed once, but surely that didn’t mean anything? Her mind tried to calculate dates, but so much had happened in such a short time that she’d lost track. She’d left her first bedsit, moved in with Connie and Derek for a while and then ended up here. Oh God … and as realisation dawned, Pearl’s face drained of colour. It wasn’t just one period she had missed – it was two. With a gasp she stumbled to her feet and into the hall, taking the stairs two at a time as she fled to the sanctuary of her bedroom

No! Oh, no! She was pregnant. But it wasn’t Derek’s baby she was carrying.

Pearl was lying on her bed when Mo tapped gently on the door but, unable to face her, she buried her head in the pillow. She heard the door open, and hunched her shoulders.

‘Well, Pearl, from your reaction, I think I’m right after all. Come on, it ain’t the end of the world. You’re not the first girl to get herself pregnant before the wedding and I doubt you’ll be the last. At least you’re engaged to Derek and now you’ll just have to get married as soon as possible. You ain’t showing yet, so it won’t be so bad.’

A sob rose in Pearl’s chest. She had expected disgust, censure, but instead Mo was being so kind. What would her reaction be when she found out the truth?

‘Try to pull yourself together, love, or you’ll be late for work. Have a chat with Derek as soon as you get the chance, and don’t worry, I reckon he’ll be as pleased as punch. Anyone can see that he thinks the world of you.’

Pearl gasped, her whole body shaking and, obviously bewildered, Mo continued to pat her back. The door opened again, Emma coming into the room.

‘What’s going on?’ she demanded. ‘What’s the matter with Pearl?’

‘Shall I tell her, love?’ Mo asked.

Pearl fought to bring herself under control, managing to nod her head in agreement, but couldn’t look at Emma as Mo broke the news.

‘Pregnant!’ she gasped. ‘Blimey, you soppy cow. Does Derek know?’

With another sob, Pearl shook her head. She would have to face Derek, but dreaded his reaction. She was carrying another man’s child and there was no way he’d marry her now. Unable to put coherent thoughts in order, her mind raced. Connie would go mad too, and there was Dolly Dolby. What would she say when she found out that Kevin was the father?

Kevin! Kevin was the baby’s father! Her stomach lurched. She had been denying her feelings for him for so long, but now that she was carrying his child they overwhelmed her. Despite the way he’d behaved – despite the flaws in his character – she was in love with him.

When Pearl finally dashed into the café she was half an hour late, but instead of giving her a reprimand, Bernie puffed out his cheeks in relief.

‘I was worried that you weren’t going to show up. Madge is late too, and Dolly’s in a right old state.’

‘I’m sorry,’ Pearl told him, tying her apron hurriedly.

‘You don’t look too good, girl, and you look like you’ve been crying.’

‘I … I’m fine.’

‘If you say so, but perhaps you’re coming down with a cold.’

‘Yes, maybe,’ she said, thankful for the excuse.

The morning rush had just started and Madge still hadn’t arrived. Pearl took her first order through to the kitchen.

‘You look awful.’ Dolly said.

‘I think I’m coming down with a cold.’ Pearl was glad to grasp at Bernie’s comment. Mo wasn’t due in yet, but she dreaded her arrival. She’d promised not to say anything, but Pearl knew how much the woman loved a good gossip. There wouldn’t be a chance to talk to Derek until her break, but if Mo opened her mouth the news would spread like wildfire. Please, God, she prayed, let him hear it from me.

Madge came into the kitchen.

‘Where have you been?’ Dolly snapped.

‘Sorry, but I ain’t feeling well. I’ve got an appointment at the doctor’s but not until eleven thirty.’

‘You look all right to me.’

‘Have a heart, Dolly. When I woke up this morning I was in a terrible state, so wet with sweat that I had to have a bath. I may be a bit late, but I still turned up for work.’

‘All right, don’t go on about it, and get on with your work.’ Dolly’s eyes flicked to Pearl, ‘and that goes for you too.’

As they scuttled back into the dining room, Madge threw Pearl a wink. ‘Dolly missed her vocation. She should have been a bleeding sergeant major.’

Pearl managed a small smile but her heart wasn’t in it. In truth, tears were just below the surface but she fought them as she tackled the breakfast rush. How had it happened? She’d only slept with Kevin once, yet she was pregnant. Please let him want me. Please let him want our baby.

Derek came in at eight thirty but she could hardly look at him, just murmuring that she needed to talk to him later. He looked puzzled, but seeing how pushed she was he didn’t ask questions.

At last the café emptied, and at ten thirty Bernie called out, ‘Pearl, you still look awful. Madge can manage now so why don’t you have a break?’

Pearl picked up a stack of crockery and went to the kitchen. ‘Dolly, I’m just about to take a break. Is it all right if I pop out for a while?’

‘What for?’

‘There … there’s something important I have to do.’

Dolly heaved a sigh. ‘All right, but don’t be long. Madge has to be at the doctor’s for half-past eleven.’

‘Good luck,’ Mo called.

‘Why does she need luck?’ Dolly asked.

Mo and Pearl looked at each other, both stuck for words, Pearl’s face now livid with colour. It was Mo who managed to stutter an answer, ‘Er … she’s going to sort out the wedding date with Derek.’

Without giving Dolly a chance to speak again, Pearl swiftly left the kitchen, still wearing her apron as she made for Derek’s stall.

He saw her coming and grinned. ‘Watcha, love.’

‘I … I need to talk to you,’ she stammered.

Frank’s voice rose raucously from the next stall, ‘Apples – Bramley apples. Come on, ladies, only sixpence a pound.’

Derek glanced at Frank and said sadly, ‘I still can’t believe that Frank’s leaving the market. He’s been pitched next to me for donkey’s years. Anyway, love, what do you want to talk to me about?’

‘Alone … we need to be alone.’

‘There ain’t much chance of that. Can’t it wait until tonight?’

‘No … it must be now.’

‘Frank,’ Derek called, ‘can you watch me stall for a while?’

‘Yeah, all right.’

‘We’ll go for a walk, will that do?’ Derek asked as he took Pearl’s arm.

She nodded, feeling sick inside. She may not be in love with Derek, but was very fond of him and if this hadn’t happened she’d have married him. Unbidden, a thought popped into Pearl’s mind. Yes, but would you really have gone through with it? Pearl shook her head against the question. She’d been enjoying life, loved living with Emma and Mo, and had been relieved when Derek offered a long engagement. A year was a long way off, and she had avoided thinking about marriage. Now everything was going to change and stark reality was staring her in the face. She was going to lose Derek, lose his friendship, his protection. Tears gathered, but she managed to hold them back. She had betrayed this lovely man, she was going to hurt him badly, and however bad his reaction, it would be no more than she deserved.

They walked to the end of the market, and along Shuttleworth Road, Pearl’s head low. There was a pub ahead and as they drew alongside it, Derek stuck his head inside.

‘The snug’s empty. Come on, we can talk in there.’

With her head still low, Pearl sat at a table, and when Derek asked her what she wanted to drink her throat felt as if it was closing. She managed to speak, a croak, ‘Nothing, thanks.’

He walked to the bar, soon returning with half a pint of beer to take the seat beside her. ‘Now then, what’s this all about?’

She couldn’t look at him, she just couldn’t, her voice still a strangled whisper when she finally was able to spit out the words. ‘I … I’m having a baby.’

There was a moment of silence, but then Derek’s voice was loud in protest. ‘Don’t be daft. Talk sense, Pearl. You can’t be having a baby. We ain’t … well, done it, if you know what I mean.’

‘Yes, I know, but I … I’m definitely pregnant.’

There was another moment of silence and finally Pearl was able to glance at Derek, a swift look that showed his face white with shock.

‘Who was it, Pearl? I’ll bloody kill him.’

‘I can’t tell you. He … he doesn’t know yet.’

Derek seemed to slump in his seat, his head shaking in denial. ‘I can’t believe this. Here, wait a minute, did he force you?’

With all her heart, Pearl wished she could say yes. At least that might ease this lovely man’s pain, but with a sigh she said, ‘No, he didn’t force me.’

‘I’ll still kill him.’

‘No, Derek, please don’t say that. I’m so sorry, I really am. It only happened once, that was all.’

‘Huh, it only takes once. Bloody hell, Pearl, we’re engaged. I was gonna marry you.’

Pearl looked at him at last and, unable to bear the hurt she could see in his eyes, tugged the ring from her finger. She then laid it on the table and rose to her feet, choking back tears as she ran out of the pub, leaving Derek slumped in his seat, looking like a whipped dog.

‘Here, Pearl, where’s Derek?’ Frank called as she hurried through the market.

She couldn’t answer him, couldn’t speak. It had been awful, dreadful, Derek’s pain terrible to see. He would never forgive her and she didn’t blame him.

The café was almost empty when Pearl stumbled through the door and sank down at the nearest table. Head buried in her arms, a huge sob rose, a dam of tears bursting as she finally broke.

‘Pearl, what’s wrong?’ Madge asked, hurrying to her side.

Unable to answer, she was aware only of Madge tugging her arm, urging her to the kitchen. ‘Come on, girl, let’s get you out of here.’

Somehow Pearl managed to drag herself up and as they entered the kitchen Madge said, ‘Dolly, I’ve got to go now, but Pearl’s in a right old state.’

‘All right, get yourself off.’

Madge patted Pearl’s back before hurrying out, Dolly then saying, ‘Now then, what’s all this? Mo’s told us that you’re pregnant and I must say I’m shocked. Still, it ain’t the end of the world and I can’t see why you’re so upset. Surely Derek has said he’ll marry you as soon as possible.’

Pearl knew there was no way out. She took a deep shuddering breath, struggling to bring herself under control. ‘The … the baby isn’t his.’

They were all gawking, faces stretched with shock, but it was Dolly who voiced their thoughts. ‘My God, you look such a little innocent, but now you’re telling us that you’re pregnant by another man. Who’s the father then?’

‘I … I can’t tell you.’

‘Why not? Is he married?’

‘No, he isn’t, but he doesn’t know yet.’

‘Well, you’d better tell him, my girl, and as soon as possible.’

Yes, but how? Pearl thought. She hadn’t seen Kevin for a couple of days, and when she did he ignored her. Worse was to come when Mo spoke.

‘I thought you were a nice girl and that’s why I offered you a room. You’ve only been around these parts for about five months and in that short time you got yourself engaged to Derek Lewis. Now you’ve got the nerve to tell us you’re pregnant, but it ain’t his baby. Well, madam, after your shift you can pack your stuff and get out of my house. I don’t want my Emma associating with the likes of you.’

With a sob Pearl fled the kitchen, and the café. She heard Bernie’s shout, but nothing stopped her.

Tears blinded Pearl’s eyes and she didn’t see Bessie Penfold sweeping the pavement outside her shop until she collided with her.

‘Blimey, girl, watch where you’re going! Gawd, what’s the matter? Has Dolly Dolby been on the warpath again? That woman can’t keep waitresses for more than five minutes.’

Without waiting for a reply, Bessie took Pearl’s arm, ushering her into the shop and locking the door behind them. ‘I’ve seen more girls leave that café than number nineteen buses. Mind you, I’ve never seen one leaving in a state like this. Hold on and I’ll put the kettle on. You look like you could do with a cup of good strong tea.’

Bessie bustled out to the back room, but by the time she returned, Pearl had managed to calm down only a little. She was handed a cup of tea that looked almost black, but found her hands shaking so much that the cup rattled in the saucer.

‘Now then. Do you want to talk about it?’

As she looked into the old woman’s dark eyes, Pearl saw gentleness, wisdom, and with the need to unburden, the words spilled from her mouth, ending with, ‘… and I … I’ve got to leave my room too. Mo is disgusted with me.’

‘Don’t take any notice of Mo Price. She’s no better than she should be. I could tell you a few things about her that might shock you, but I ain’t one to gossip. Right, let’s take this one step at a time. First you need to have a word with Kevin Dolby, but if you ask me he’ll try to squirm out of it.’

‘But he can’t – surely he can’t? Oh God, what will I do?’

‘You could get rid of it.’

Pearl stared at the woman in horror, her hand inadvertently touching her stomach. ‘Oh, no, I couldn’t do that.’

‘Yeah, I suppose it could be a bit risky, but you could have it adopted.’

Pearl frantically shook her head. ‘No, I’d never let my baby be adopted.’

‘You can’t support a kid on your own and, if you ask me, it would be the best thing for it.’

‘No it wouldn’t,’ Pearl cried. ‘I came from an orphanage and know what it’s like. I’ve seen children fostered out and then returned, sometimes traumatised by what happened to them.’

‘I said adopted, not fostered out.’

‘I know, but some of the children put up for adoption were returned too. Can you imagine what it was like for them? They dreamed of being part of a proper family, but some people only want perfection, not a traumatised child who may wet the bed or find it difficult to settle into a normal home.’

‘It wouldn’t be like that for a baby.’

Pearl touched her stomach again. She knew what it was like to be without parents, without love, always wondering why she had been put in an orphanage. Always wondering who her mother was, her father was, and why they’d rejected her. She shook her head again. No matter what, she was determined that her baby wouldn’t suffer the same fate. Her voice was strong as she said, ‘Whether Kevin marries me or not, I’m keeping my baby.’

‘All right, I can see why you feel like that, but it ain’t gonna be easy for you.’

‘I don’t care. I’ll manage somehow.’

‘Yeah, I think you will,’ Bessie said softly. ‘Anyway, for the time being you need a place to stay. I’ve got a spare room and, though it ain’t up to much, you’re welcome to it. If you need a job for a while you can help me out in the shop. It’s getting a bit much for me nowadays, but I won’t be able to pay you much.’

Pearl stared at Bessie Penfold with amazement. There had been no censure, just advice, and now the offer of a room and job. Her eyes filled with tears again at such kindness. ‘Oh, thank you. Thank you so much.’

‘There’s no need to thank me. If you remember, I told you that our paths would cross again and I was right. Now come on, I’ll show you the room and then I’d best open the shop again. I can’t afford to lose customers.’

As Pearl rose to her feet she felt a surge of guilt. She had run out of the café, leaving them in the lurch, and she hoped Madge would be able to cope with the lunchtime rush. God – was she losing her mind? When Dolly found out she was carrying Kevin’s child, she’d go mad. No, she couldn’t go back, she couldn’t face Dolly, and quaked with fear at the thought.

She followed Bessie upstairs, and as the woman led her into a small room, Pearl saw it as a refuge.