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CHAPTER TWO

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Tess’s hut looked like all the rest: woven rice grass hung around the outside of a wooden frame. Carefully woven palm spikes had been thatched to make a thick, impermeable roof to keep the rain at bay during the monsoon season, which would begin shortly. The boy pointed to an opening covered with a faded orange cotton cloth.

“Tess?” Pete called hesitantly at the door.

“Come in.”

He pushed the cloth aside. The three small windows were open to allow air and light into the hut, but he had to stand still for a moment to let his eyes adjust. Tess sat cross-legged on a rice mat with a child in her arms. She had cleaned up and changed out of her black pajama outfit into a pale pink cotton blouse and khaki pants that looked threadbare. Her hair had been washed and brushed, and it lay in damp strands down her back. Long hair meant sweet exploration, Pete thought as he imagined his fingers combing through that rich red, gold and copper carpet. The image sent a sharp shaft of longing through him.

The child in her arms was a little girl, no more than four years old. Frowning, Pete stepped closer.

“What’s wrong with her?”

Tess glanced up at him. In the shadowy light, Pete’s face showed the first genuine concern she’d seen in him for someone other than himself.

“She stepped on a rusty nail the other day.” Tess ran her hand worriedly down the child’s spindly leg to where a dirty bandage covered her small foot. Feeling the child’s damp brow, she murmured, “She’s running a fever.”

“Has she had a tetanus shot?”

Tess held his troubled stare. Maybe he wasn’t as shallow as she’d first thought. Maybe there was a shred of depth and concern for others in his life. Maybe. “What tetanus shot? Captain, out here we don’t have such things.” She gently unbandaged the girl’s foot. The flesh was red and swollen around the puncture wound.

Pete came forward and crouched next to Tess and the girl, frowning. “Damn, but that looks ugly.”

“It is,” Tess said softly as she gently stroked the girl’s sweaty cheek and head. “I washed it out the best I could this morning. The supply truck comes by tomorrow. I could send her on it to the hospital at Da Nang.”

“Did you use soap and water?”

“Yes.”

“That’s all you have?”

“We didn’t get soap until about six months ago, Captain, so I’m not complaining. It’s a step forward.”

Pete’s heart went out to the little girl, who sleepily rubbed her eyes, then nuzzled deeply into Tess’s arms, her face pressed against Tess’s breast, as if she were her mother. “Where are her parents?”

“The mother’s dead. She stepped on a mine meant for an ARVN soldier in one of our rice paddies earlier this month.”

“Oh.”

“This is the frustrating part of being over here. I know about tetanus shots, antibiotics and everything else available in the real world. But they don’t exist here.” Tess’s voice lowered with pain and weariness. “In fifteen months I’ve seen so many needless deaths just for lack of simple things like vaccines and antibiotics.”

Bitter memories surfaced in Pete, and he struggled to keep them at bay. He watched almost with jealousy as the little girl in Tess’s arms gradually fell asleep, warm, obviously loved and protected.

Looking at Tess in the dim light, her damp red hair curling softly as it dried, Pete felt his heart respond powerfully to the expression on her face. In the shadows her features glowed with such care and concern for the child in her arms. Each stroke of her long, work-worn fingers across the child’s injured extremity tore at his closely guarded heart. It was the look of love on Tess’s face that suddenly gripped him, held him as nothing ever had in his entire life. There was such compassion in her large green eyes fraught with anguish. The richness of her mouth, her lips parted as if in a silent cry for the helpless child, startled him.

Shaken deeply, Pete suddenly got to his feet and backed away. He scowled, feeling a mixture of pain, hope, anger and need. It was a stupid array of feelings to have churning within him, but he wanted to be in Tess’s arms, being stroked by her caring hand, seeing that look in her eyes for him. Muttering a curse under his breath, Pete walked to the door of the hut, unable to sort through what was going on within him. Why should this particular scene, a not-unfamiliar one, get to him? Why now? Was it Tess? Him?

“I hate Vietnam,” he ground out in frustration. “Everywhere I look, there’s nothing but stinking poverty and suffering.” He gripped the orange curtain with his fist and pulled it aside to stare blindly out the opening.

Tess looked up. “Captain, some things, with time, you’ll get used to.” She glanced lovingly down at the child in her arms. “Others, you never will.”

“How could you have signed over for a second tour?” Pete demanded in a strangled voice.

Leaning down, Tess pressed a small kiss on the sleeping child’s brow. Looking up to meet his tortured gaze, she whispered, “How could I not?”

Pete froze at her softly spoken words. He saw the hope of the world in her eyes, and realized that she was one of those people who had a heart larger than her body, larger than her brain, and that it was going to get her into trouble someday. She gave more than she ever got. He tore his gaze from her lustrous eyes. Pete took more than he gave, and he knew it. But then, everything had been taken away from him since birth—he wasn’t about to give any precious piece of himself back to anyone or anything that might run away with it, hurting him all over again.

“You know what a scrounger is?” he said abruptly.

“No.”

He jabbed his thumb into his chest. “I’m one. Every squadron has a guy who’s good at getting things, scrounging up whatever is needed from God knows where.”

A slight smile hovered around Tess’s mouth. “Is that more or less like a wheeler-dealer? A used-car salesman?”

A thaw went through Pete as her smile gently touched his walled heart. How could her one, sad smile, get to him so easily? Completely off balance in Tess’s quiet, serene presence, he nodded. “Yeah, I’m the guy who can double- and triple-talk anyone out of anything. Look, why don’t you come back to Marble Mountain with me? While you’re there, I’ll scrounge up some tetanus vaccine and antibiotics for this kid.”

Tess gasped. “You could do that?” Even her brother, Gib, who wasn’t immune to the recent suffering of the Vietnamese people, hadn’t been able to requisition any medical supplies for her villages—as much as he’d wanted to.

Grinning cockily, some of his old spirit returning, Pete nodded. “Honey, I’m the best scrounger in the world. What you need, I can get.” Without reason, he wanted her to come back with him. A hunger ate at him to know Tess better—much better. Normally, he didn’t care what was in a woman’s head, it was always her body that got his undivided attention. But curiosity about Tess transcended his normal needs regarding women, and Pete was at a loss to explain why.

“Well—”

“Come on. You can’t do this girl much good here. If you come with me, I’ll make sure you get your medical supplies. Now, how can you pass up a deal like that?” he cajoled.

Smiling with relief, Tess nodded. “You’re right: I can’t. Not for her or the people of the three villages I work with. Okay, I’ll go with you.”

“According to Gib, you’re supposed to come back to Da Nang every night, anyway.”

Tess gently placed the girl on a sleeping mat and rummaged through a large rice-mat chest. She felt more than saw Pete draw near to look over her shoulder at what she was doing. “Gib would like me to go to Da Nang every night, but I don’t,” Tess said. Her precious supply of bandages—thin cotton strips that she’d torn from her old shirts, washed and then boiled thoroughly—were almost gone. With care, she took a vial of iodine from the chest.

Pete snorted as she laid out her meager medical items. “God, is that all you have to work with?” He looked at the strips of cotton in lieu of true bandages or dressings, a lousy one-ounce bottle of iodine, a pair of scissors and a set of tweezers.

“That’s been it ever since I arrived here.” Tess set to work scrubbing out the girl’s infected foot with cool, soapy water. Afterward, she placed more iodine into the puncture wound, bandaged it, then covered the girl with a thin excuse for a blanket and allowed her to go to sleep.

Tess got to her feet. “She’ll sleep for a while. Let me go next door and ask the woman to check in on her while I’m gone.”

“Where’s the rest of this kid’s family?”

“Her father is a sergeant in the South Vietnamese Army, her two older brothers have been kidnapped by VC, and you know what happened to her mother. She has no one. I’ll be right back.”

Pete stood in the hut, alone with the sleeping child. As much as he wanted to bar the raw, rising emotions from his heart, he couldn’t. Looking down at the girl, her small hands gently curled in sleep—some of the pain she was suffering eliminated through Tess’s care and love—he felt tears flood into his eyes.

“What the hell?” he rasped, and took a step back toward the door. Blinking furiously, Pete retreated, unable to deal with the quandary of feelings that Tess had unknowingly evoked within him. What was the matter with him? Why should he feel anything for this little rug rat?

Tess met him outside. The late afternoon sun shot through the lush vegetation that surrounded the busy village. The fragrant scent of cooking pots filled with rice and vegetables, the wood smoke and the singsong voices of the people impinged upon Pete’s heightened awareness. Although Tess wore baggy clothes, in his opinion barely suitable for a beggar, nothing could hide her obvious femininity.

Perhaps it was her shoulder-length red hair—now caught up in a haphazard ponytail with tendrils touching her high cheekbones—that made her so beautiful. Pete blinked, and stared at her as she approached. Back Stateside, a buxom chick in a miniskirt always got his attention. Now this woman, who wore Third World garments and no makeup, somehow looked more beautiful than any of those women he’d ever chased and caught.

“I’ll get my knapsack and be with you in just a second,” Tess promised. She saw a confused and penetrating look in Pete’s eyes as she walked past him. There was something going on between them, and Tess wasn’t sure what it was. As she went into her hut and picked up the olive green knapsack that had literally been around the world with her, she wondered what it was about this cocky, narrow-minded pilot that touched her heart. One moment he was such a hard case, yet the next he seemed an angel of mercy.

As Tess walked with Pete back to where the jeep was parked, she asked suspiciously, “So what’s in this for you if you get me the medical supplies I need?”

Pete grinned. “You.”

She shot him a withering glance. “I’m off-limits.”

“Not to me, you’re not.”

With disgust, Tess muttered, “You can’t demand a person do or be something you want, Captain.”

Pete laughed and opened his hands in a peaceful gesture. “But look at me: here I am, twenty-eight years old, a bachelor, handsome as hell and unattached. What more could you want, Tess?”

Inwardly, Tess offered grudging agreement. He was terribly handsome, and when his mouth lifted into his boyish grin, his dimples and smile lines deepened, giving his face a wonderful character. “I would think an intelligent man would want a woman to come to him of her own volition, not because she was blackmailed.”

“Some women just don’t know what they’re missing until they get it.”

Tess halted next to the jeep and tossed her knapsack in the back. She climbed in. “`It’ being a roll in the hay?”

With a shrug, Pete climbed in and started up the jeep. The vehicle coughed, sputtered, then roared to life. “I can’t think of anything better than sharing my bed with a woman. Can you?”

Tess gazed at him in utter shock. The jeep jerked twice, then they were off down the rutted dirt road, heading toward Marble Mountain, only a few miles south of Da Nang.

“Are you for real? I mean, are you serious about this trade-off—medical supplies for me?”

Pete backed off at the angry fire in her verdant eyes. He was an artist of sorts when it came to manipulating a woman into his arms. Too much pushing and Tess would tell him to take a walk. “Well,” he hedged, “let’s just say I’d hope you’d entertain the thought of letting me into your life a little.”

“Going to bed with someone isn’t a `little’ thing, Captain.”

“Couldn’t you call me Pete?”

Tess crossed her arms. “I guess...if you want.” She scowled at him. “Where I come from, women save themselves for marriage, and engagements are in order.”

Chuckling, Pete said, “Hey! Now, I’m not getting that serious, honey.”

“I didn’t think so.”

For some reason, Pete winced inwardly at her bitter tone. For some reason, he wanted Tess’s respect, not the disgust written so eloquently on her lovely features. “Look, don’t take this so seriously. Just let me get to know you a little better.”

“What does `better’ mean?”

“A date at the officers club? Maybe we could do some dancing? It’s not much of an O club yet, just a couple of tents, but we’ve got a plywood dance floor and a mean jukebox. We could have a couple of drinks.”

“I don’t drink. And I haven’t danced in years. I’d probably step all over your feet and break one of your toes. At the very least, I’d break your healthy ego.” Tess looked at the surrounding vegetation, in every shade of green ranging from yellows to nearly black. “And as for partying, I’m a stick-in-the-mud. Back at Texas A & M, I was one of those girls who stayed in the dorm and studied. I wasn’t out every night with the frat boys.”

“Well, let’s just start with a talk over some ice water at tonight’s party. Fair enough?” Pete gave her his best little-boy look, guaranteed to get him an affirmative response. This time, however, he felt a bit guilty, because he knew Tess was leveling with him, and he wasn’t with her.

“Tonight?”

“Why not? You’ll be at the party at our squadron. I’ll requisition a jeep and drive you back over to Da Nang. You can return to the village tomorrow morning.”

“I was hoping you’d get me the medical supplies and I’d hop a ride back to Le My with a convoy going this direction tonight. Or maybe Gib could authorize me a helicopter ride back to the village. That little girl needs the tetanus shot and antibiotics as soon as possible. My conscience would eat me up alive if I stayed overnight, knowing she could die without the medicine.”

She was right. Pete realized Tess was extraordinarily sensitive to those around her, not necessarily to herself. “Man, we’re complete opposites,” he muttered as the jeep bounced along the road. “Every time I get off a chopper flight, I hit the bar and have a good time. There’s no guarantee I’m coming back from any one of those flights, and I’m not putting my life on hold because of it.”

“What I do is relatively safe,” Tess said. “So that kind of good time isn’t high on my list of important activities.”

“Like hell your job’s safe. It isn’t. The VC are getting aggressive, and Intelligence says they’re gonna start getting real nasty real soon. You’re a white American woman, and you’re gonna be in their sites.” Pete glanced over at her profile, wildly aware of the innate gentleness of her mouth and the softness in her eyes. “Don’t ever think you won’t be a target, Tess.”

With a shrug, she said, “Listen, everyone knows me—friend and foe alike. They know my work. I’ve helped the Vietnamese increase rice yields, gotten them more food and improved their existence. I’m here as an AID advisor in an agricultural capacity. No, Pete, I’m safe. They won’t hurt me.”

“Brother, are you an ostrich with your head in the sand.” Shaking his own head, he looked both ways, then turned onto the asphalt of Highway 1. Gunning the jeep on the smooth road, he relaxed slightly, knowing there was less chance of VC attack on the highway, too.

Tess smiled absently and leaned back against the less-than-comfortable jeep seat. “So, will you get me the supplies as soon as we get to Marble Mountain?”

“Yeah, I suppose.”

“I’ll go over and see Gib about a chopper flight back while you do that.”

“No, don’t. I’ll fly you back.”

Tess stared over at Pete in surprise. His mouth flat, the corners pulled in. “Thanks,” she said, meaning it.

“Yeah, don’t mention it.”

“Maybe you’re not such a bad guy after all.” Tess grinned. When Pete glanced over at her, he didn’t look very happy. “And don’t worry, as soon as I can, I’ll have that glass of ice water with you at the O club.”

Heartened, Pete suddenly couldn’t remember when he’d wanted anything quite so badly. He wanted to know a hell of a lot more about what made Tess Ramsey tick. She was a lone American woman in a Third World country, surrounded by escalating danger and hardened military men. But none of these things seemed to register with Tess. With a sigh, he realized that Tess wouldn’t be in his arms tonight. He’d be spending time with her, albeit with him in the cockpit and her in the rear with the door gunner. Still, the hope in her eyes, the awe that he could finagle medical supplies for her, had won him some of her respect and approval, and Pete knew it.

* * *

It was early evening when they arrived back at the Marine Air Group at Marble Mountain. To Tess’s disappointment, Gib was out on a helicopter flight, so she wouldn’t be able to see him. Pete insisted that Tess walk with him over to the group of olive green tents, wood-backed and set on platforms to keep them above the sandy ground, that housed thousands of boxes of supplies for the base. She stood to one side as Pete corraled a marine gunny sergeant, a position she knew to be very powerful in the military system.

“Look, Gunny,” Pete cajoled, “I need a box of vaccines—all kinds—and a box of antibiotics for this pretty young lady here. She works with the villagers. What have you got for her?”

The gunny, a grizzled, lean man with sharp gray eyes, sized up Pete and then Tess. “What have you got for me, Captain?”

Grinning affably, Pete looked around the dark, silent reaches of the tent. “What do you need, Gunny? Name it, and it’s yours.”

The gunny snorted. “How about a case of Johnnie Walker Red?”

“Done.” Pete thrust out his hand.

The gunny shook it, then gave him a wary look. “When am I gettin’ it?”

“I gotta make a milk run down to Saigon next week. I’ll pick it up and deliver it to you on my return. How’s that sound?”

“Good,” the gunny growled.

Pete smiled triumphantly over at Tess as the marine sergeant disappeared between the aisles. “Well? What do you think?”

Tess shook her head, awed. “I think you’re an angel in disguise.”

“Me? An angel?” Pete laughed deeply. “I’ve been accused by my ladies of being many things—a bastard, a devil, a swindler, a liar—but never an angel.”

Tess tilted her head and studied him in the tent’s shadowy gloom. There was such a wall around Pete that she could almost feel it. Why? It was as if he wanted her to think the worst of him. What about the good he also carried within him? “That’s quite a list of adjectives.”

“Yeah, well, the ladies were right. I’m not the nicest guy in the world.” Pete shook his finger in her direction. “And stop looking at me with those beautiful green eyes with the hope of the world in them. I’m a bastard. I make no bones about it. Life’s short and I intend to play hard and work a little. I’m not an angel, Tess Ramsey, and don’t you ever forget that.”

Sitting on the nylon seat in the rear of the Sikorsky helicopter on the way back to Le My, Tess held both precious cardboard boxes of medical supplies on her lap. Darkness had fallen, and all she could see in the reddish light from the cockpit display up front was the bare outline of Pete’s helmeted head. He sat in the pilot’s seat, his gloved hands busy with the controls, keeping the aircraft stable as they sped toward their destination. Night flights weren’t a helicopter’s strong point, Tess knew, although they often did fly in the murky darkness.

Pete had assured her that he could make this short hop blindfolded. Well, that was close to the truth. Tess’s awe of him had risen a notch by the very fact he was willing to fly her back to the village. Knowing full well he could have refused, she rummaged around in her heart, trying to understand what made him run the way he did. He was an enigma. Verbally, he was telling her he was a bastard to every woman he’d met. Yet, he was flying a mission of mercy for her and the little girl. Of course she hadn’t forgotten that Pete was probably counting on the chance to seduce her at a later date.

As the helicopter landed outside Le My, many of the children came running out to see it. Pete gave orders to his copilot, Lieutenant Joe Keegan, and his door gunner, Lance Corporal Jerry Random, to keep their eyes peeled for trouble in the form of roving VC while he escorted Tess into the village. Tess climbed out of the aircraft, her precious cargo cradled in her arms as the powerful blades whipped up dust and debris all around her. Pete unhooked his communications jack and, leaving his helmet on, climbed out of the front seat. Leaping down, he gripped Tess’s arm and hurried her away from the buffeting wind.

The children ran alongside them, their voices high with excitement. Tess was wildly aware that Pete hadn’t released her elbow as he shepherded her along the dirt path into the village. The air seemed charged with energy as he grinned down at her.

“See, I told you we’d get you here with no problem.”

“You’ve got eyes like a cat,” Tess agreed breathlessly.

“Here, let me help you.” Pete took one of the supply boxes and tucked it under his left arm. He looked around, feeling edgy. This flight wasn’t authorized by anyone. He doubted Gib would have okayed it. Night flights were strictly planned, and little jaunts like this one were forbidden. Pete didn’t trust the VC buildup he knew was taking place, either. If he got the helicopter shot up or one of his crew wounded, all hell would break loose and his career would go down the tubes.

In the village, some of the adults came out to see who had arrived. Tess halted at her hut and quickly moved the curtain aside. An old kerosene lamp sputtered in one corner, shedding meager light. On the grass mat the little girl still slept. Going over to her, Tess touched the child’s brow.

“How is she?” Pete asked, kneeling next to Tess and opening the box of antibiotics.

“Terribly hot. Her temperature must be 102 or 103.”

Taking off his helmet, Pete set it aside. “Here, let me help.” He saw the worry in Tess’s shadowed eyes, and the way her mouth was pursed to hold back her real reaction to the girl’s deteriorating condition. Ripping off the top of the cardboard box, Pete located the antibiotics. “Start her with 500 milligrams of penicillin.”

“That’s a heavy dose,” Tess protested.

“Yeah, but honey, you ain’t got no choice.” He motioned to the little girl’s foot. “Look at the red lines moving up her leg. The kid’s got blood poisoning.”

“Oh, God...” Tess looked more closely. Her hands shook as she took the syringe and needle from Pete.

“Hey, relax. She’s gonna make it. Just give her this shot, keep her cooled down with water, and by morning she’ll be a lot better.”

Tess gave him an odd look. “Are you a doctor?”

Shyly, Pete shrugged. “Nah, I’m just the kind of bastard that knows a little about a lot of things. Go on, give her the penicillin.” Gently he turned the girl onto her side so that Tess could give the shot.

Relief cascaded through Tess afterward. Pete had also wrangled an entire box of syringes and needles, so she wouldn’t have to keep boiling and using the old ones over again as she had in the past. “Thanks,” she murmured, her voice wobbly with feeling. “You really are a knight in shining armor to us.”

Pete snorted and slowly rose. “Don’t go putting me on any pedestals, honey, I’ll sure as hell fall off faster and quicker than you could ever believe. Listen, I gotta hoof it out of here. I don’t like leaving my helo crew sitting ducks on the ground.”

Immediately, Tess stood. “I—thanks, Pete. Thanks so much....”

Gone was the brusque, hard-talking woman of this afternoon. In her place, Pete was privileged to see the real Tess. And sweet God, did he like what he saw. With a shrug he placed his hand on her shoulder. “It’s nothing.”

“I don’t call helping a little girl `nothing.’” There was such vulnerability in his eyes now. Tess felt her breath become suspended and her heart start to beat fast at the discovery. Pete’s hand felt good, steadying her spinning emotions.

“Then,” Pete whispered, devilry dancing in his eyes, “I intend to collect for my good deed sooner or later.” The urge to lean forward those few inches and kiss the hell out of her parted, soft lips was almost Pete’s undoing. But something cautioned him not to do it—at least, not yet. Patting her shoulder, he said, “I’ll see you around, honey.”

He was gone. Tess stood in the center of the hut, the syringe still in her hand. Whatever powerful magic was at work made her feel dizzy and not of this world. Trying to shake off Pete’s overwhelming presence, she turned and knelt down by the little girl. Tess’s night would be spent bathing the child to keep her temperature down until the antibiotic took hold—if only it would. Some of Tess’s hope diminished as she heard the helicopter take off, the heavy whap, whap of blades cutting through the humid air that always hung over Vietnam.

She began to gently bathe the girl, and her hope continued to erode as the last sounds of the helicopter bearing Pete Mallory back to Marble Mountain faded into nothing. It had been a crazy day in so many ways. Pete had crashed into her life, quite literally. Tess couldn’t understand how his hard line toward women in general went with such a compassionate streak toward children. It didn’t make sense. He didn’t make sense.

Still, as she remained awake through the early morning hours, bathing the delirious child, Tess couldn’t forget Pete. There had been moments when his eyes had revealed another side to him—and it was that side she wanted to know. Tess sighed. She’d already lost her innocence about life and men. Three years ago, she’d been engaged to Eric Hampton, a Peace Corps volunteer. So caught up with being in love, Tess had given herself—body, heart and soul—to him.

Tess struggled to shake off much-needed sleep to stay up with the girl. By 3:00 a.m., the child’s temperature was beginning to drop. Relief shattered through Tess as she lay down and drew the girl into her arms. She closed her eyes, but sleep refused to come. Pete’s unexpected entrance into her life had stirred up a lot of unsolved feelings toward Eric.

Eric had been the exact opposite of Pete: quiet, sincere and hardworking. Somehow, the engagement had fallen apart. What had gone wrong? Had it been her? Was she incapable of being loved? Or of knowing what love really was? Now Pete was saying he was a bastard, making no bones about it, and yet there was such a discrepancy between his words and his actions. Unable to figure it all out, Tess sighed again and gave the little girl a gentle squeeze, just to let her know she was loved and cared for.

Pete Mallory was a hunter with few morals or values when it came to women. The pain in Tess’s heart widened as she broached the twilight zone between sleep and wakefulness. So how could she be drawn to him? How? Resolution wove with sleep as she surrendered to the security of the darkness. Under no circumstance would she allow herself to be manipulated. No way.

One Man's War

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