Читать книгу The Holiday Nanny - Lois Richer - Страница 9

“Do you think Daddy got my letter yet, Connie?”

Connie Ladden couldn’t bear to quash the hope shining in Silver Abbot’s glossy blue eyes, so she brushed the riot of blond curls away from her four—almost five—year-old charge’s face and eased onto the bed, next to the little girl.

“Remember, I showed you on the map how far away Argentina is?”

“Uh-huh.” Silver nodded solemnly.

Too solemnly for Connie’s liking. Silver wanted her daddy, and after two months as nanny for the delightful child, Connie thought Wade Abbot needed to act more like a father and be here for his precious daughter. Still, her job was to help Silver with her life as it was, not the way they wished it could be.

“Well, it’s only been about a week since we mailed it, sweetie. Argentina is a very long way for a letter to go.”

Thanks to the courier’s emailed confirmation of delivery, Connie knew the package with Silver’s recorded message had safely arrived at its destination. But she didn’t want to say that. Connie hadn’t yet met Silver’s father, and she wasn’t sure how Wade Abbot would react to his daughter’s latest communication.

“It’s been ten days. I counted.” Silver frowned. “David, at my preschool, told me email is very fast. Do you know how to do email?”

“Yes.” Connie smiled at her serious look.

“You could have sent my letter that way, couldn’t you, Connie?”

“I guess I could have. But think how nice it will be for your daddy to get an envelope from home, from his own little girl.”

David Foster, Mr. Abbot’s lawyer and Silver’s guardian, had made it clear when he hired Connie and provided Wade Abbot’s email address that Silver’s father did not want to be distracted by everyday minutiae. Wade Abbot was in Argentina on a very tight schedule. It was urgent that he bring in the project on time for Abbot Bridges, Inc., according to David. The way he’d phrased it had led Connie to deduce that the company stood to lose a substantial amount of money and perhaps forfeit future contracts with the Argentinean government if the deadline was missed.

“Your daddy might not have had a chance to open it yet.”

“’Cause he’s so busy.” Silver sighed. “I know.” Resigned, she snuggled into her bed and drew her puffy pink quilt up to her chin.

Connie bent to kiss her good-night a second time, unable to resist the downy softness of Silver’s rounded cheek or the delight of another hug.

“Can’t we have just one more story, Connie?” The chubby arms refused to release her neck. “Please?” The beguiling smile begged her to relent.

“You’ve already had three stories, munchkin. Now it’s bedtime. You know my rules.” Connie rubbed her nose against Silver’s, unclasped her grasp and tucked her arms beneath the pink quilt patterned with fairy princesses. Tiny silver bells attached to princess shoes tinkled softly. “We have a lot to do tomorrow. It’s our bird-watching day. I want to find out more about the hummingbirds here in Tucson. You need to rest those baby-blue eyes so you’ll be able to point them out.”

“You sure like hummingbirds.”

“I sure do,” Connie agreed.

“Hey, we forgot to say my prayers.” Silver grinned.

“So we did. Okay, go ahead.” Connie knelt at the side of the bed, closed her eyes and waited.

“Dear God, thank you for today. And for Connie. I love her lots.”

Connie’s heart squeezed so tight that she could barely breathe. It’s mutual, kiddo.

“We had fun flying our kites this afternoon, God. Thanks for the wind and for Cora’s yummy muffins and for Hornby’s pretty roses. Bless my daddy and bring him home soon. And help Granny Amanda not to be mad at Daddy anymore. Amen.”

“Amen.” Connie hesitated as she studied Silver. “Honey, why do you think your grandmother is mad at your father?”

“Because she said—” Silver’s blue eyes welled with tears and she snuffled, unable to finish her sentence. “I don’t believe he’d forget about me,” she muttered defiantly a moment later. “My daddy loves me. Doesn’t he, Connie?”

“Of course he does, sweetie. Everybody knows that. You must have misunderstood your grandmother.” Connie hugged the fragile body close, praying her words were true.

“Why, look at all the lovely things your daddy sends you. Your room is going to burst if he doesn’t stop.”

That made Silver smile. A few moments later, her eyelids drooped and she was asleep. Connie rose, switched the lamp to dim and padded quietly out of the room. She set the door just the tiniest bit ajar so that if Silver woke during the night she would see the hall light and not be afraid.

Connie paused, debating the wisdom of her next move. But she couldn’t put it off any longer. Something had to be done. Her job was to protect Silver.

Help me, Lord.

She trod downstairs, moving silently over the glossy hardwood until she came to the living room. She tapped on the door once then waited for an invitation to enter.

“Constance. Is everything all right?” Amanda Abbot glanced up from the magazine she was perusing. She’d spilled her tea over the lovely rosewood table and onto the white carpet but seemed oblivious to the mess.

“Oh, dear.” Connie stemmed her irritation and grabbed two napkins to sponge up what she could. “I hope that doesn’t mark.”

“Who cares? Wade can afford another one.” Amanda waved an irritated hand. “What did you want, Constance?”

Connie rose, inhaled and prayed for courage. Some noise outside the room drew her attention for a moment. Probably Cora, the Abbot’s cook, leaving for the night.

“Well?” Amanda’s eyes flashed with annoyance.

“Speak.”

“I wanted to talk to you—” Connie gulped and forced herself to continue “—about Silver.”

“What about her?” Amanda continued to flip through the magazine. “Is she sick?”

“She was upset by your comments about her father.” There, she’d said it.

“My comments?” Amanda’s lips tightened. She tossed the magazine away. “What comments, exactly, Constance?”

“Actually, it’s Connie. Plain old Connie.” She cleared her throat. “I believe you hinted that her father had forgotten about her. Silver was quite agitated by that.”

“Oh, fiddle.” Amanda huffed. “The child needs to hear the truth. As it is, she lives in a fairy tale world. It’s better to face reality.”

“But it isn’t reality, is it?” Connie asked quietly. “Her father couldn’t have forgotten about her when he sends her a gift every week.”

“Are you questioning me?” Amanda sounded outraged.

“You know that you only have this job because I allow it. I could have suggested many others to be my granddaughter’s nanny.”

But none of them would put up with your manipulations. It was the truth, but Connie didn’t say it. Amanda did not like to be contradicted.

She also did not like her stepson.

Or so it seemed to Connie.

“I believe Mr. Foster hired me because he knew I’d protect Silver. I’m not questioning you. I’m simply telling you that when you say these things about her father, it hurts Silver. And I know you don’t want to do that.” Connie paused to gather her courage. “Yesterday, you said her father had probably found another family in Argentina. Perhaps you didn’t mean for her to overhear, but she did, and she cried about it for an hour.”

“Then you weren’t doing your job, were you?” Amanda didn’t look fazed by her part in her granddaughter’s unhappiness. “You’re supposed to keep her busy and happy.”

“I’m trying to do that. I care a great deal for Silver. That’s why I’ve come to ask you to be more careful.” Connie refused to back down. “What you say could damage the relationship between Silver and her father. That’s not right.”

“What I say is none of your business. Pack your things and get out. You’re fired.”

Connie wanted to protest, but she knew it wouldn’t help. Amanda was not one to be swayed by others.

“I’m sorry if I’ve offended you,” she said quietly. “I’m only trying to do what’s best for Silver. That is why I was hired, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it is. Isn’t it, Amanda?”

Connie whirled around at the quiet but controlled voice that had come from behind her. A man identical to the picture on Silver’s night stand dropped the bag he was carrying beside his feet. He held out one hand.

“I’m Wade Abbot. I assume you are Connie Ladden, Silver’s nanny.”

“I am.” She shook his hand, felt the strength in his tanned fingers. He was so rugged looking and so handsome. A tiny shiver wiggled its way from her hand to her heart in a twitch of awareness. “I’m pleased to meet you. Your daughter talks about you constantly. She adores you.”

“Does she?” He studied her for a few moments then inclined his head. “I’d like to speak to my stepmother privately, Ms. Ladden. But when I’ve finished, I’d also like to talk to you. Could you meet me in the kitchen in a few minutes? I’ve been flying for seventeen hours and I’m starved.”

“Certainly, Mr. Abbot.”

“It’s Wade.”

“Yes, sir.” Connie forced herself not to look at Amanda as she left the room. She hurried down the hall, pausing momentarily to glance at herself in a mirror. She wished she’d had time to do something about her ponytail and lack of makeup before meeting Silver’s father. Not that it mattered. She was just the nanny.

And that’s all she intended to be. Romance was highly overrated.

“You’re not hungry again, are you?” Cora grumbled when she saw Connie. But her eyes twinkled. “Because if you are, I’ve left some chocolate cake in that cupboard.”

“Great. I’ll cut some for Mr. Abbot. He’s talking with Amanda just now, but I’m to meet him here. He’s hungry.”

“Wade’s back? Wonderful.” Cora’s round face wreathed in smiles, then as quickly saddened. “If I’d known earlier I’d have made his favorite pie, but…” She glanced at the clock.

“You have your granddaughter’s recital tonight, right? Don’t worry. I’ll heat some leftovers for him.” Connie hugged the older woman and helped her into her coat.

“Go on now.”

“You’re such a dear. This house has been filled with light and joy since you’ve come.” Cora hugged her back then frowned. “But there aren’t any leftovers to heat.”

“Then he’ll get eggs. I’m not a fantastic cook like you, but I can manage to scramble some eggs. Leave it to me.”

“Thank you, dear. I believe I will. Bless you.” The woman hurried away.

Connie assembled ingredients, set the kettle to boil and prepared the toaster. But when the slam of the front door shook the house, she decided to check on Silver. If she hadn’t already been awakened, the child would be overjoyed tomorrow when she learned her father was home.

Upstairs, Connie noticed Silver’s door was open wider than she’d left it. She hurried toward it then froze. Wade Abbot stood beside Silver’s bed, watching as the little girl slept. He stretched out a hand as if to touch her hair then quickly drew it away. Instead, he squatted beside the bed, apparently content to stare.

He was a tall man with dark brown hair cut short, probably to stem the riot of curls that now caressed the tips of his ears. Lean and fit, he had the kind of physique that came from hard physical labor. His shoulders stretched his faded chambray shirt, which he’d tucked it into a pair of well-worn jeans. His feet were covered by battered brown boots. Nothing about him gave away his status as head of a prestigious contracting firm.

Earlier, Connie had only caught a quick look at Wade Abbot’s face, but now with Silver’s bedside lamp illuminating it, she saw deeply set eyes beneath a broad forehead, chiseled cheekbones above gaunt hollows, a straight aquiline nose with a mustache beneath that partially hid his lips and a jutting chin that telegraphed grit and determination.

In slow motion he lifted something bright blue and fuzzy that released a faint tinkle. Another of Silver’s beloved bells? He set the stuffed animal beside his daughter. Then he tenderly lifted her covers and snugged them in place under her chin.

Connie knew very little about the Abbot family. David Foster had told her that Mrs. Abbot had died four years ago on a yacht in Brazil shortly after Silver’s birth. Connie knew from her internet search that the couple had been living in Brazil at the time Mrs. Abbot had died, but she’d found few other details.

Silver remembered nothing of her own mother, which was probably why she yearned for her father so much. But David Foster had warned Connie that the last nanny had left because she’d developed an affection for Wade. He’d been adamant that Connie should not suffer the same fate.

Wade isn’t interested in love, so don’t have any illusions about him.

As if Connie needed that warning. She wasn’t about to give her heart to any man again. Not after being jilted at the altar by a man she’d called a friend for years, a man she’d thought she could trust completely. He was the second important man in her life to let her down when she most needed him. Connie didn’t need a third lesson.

“I didn’t waken her.” Wade now stood beside her in the hallway, his brown eyes swirling with secrets.

“It wouldn’t have mattered if you had,” Connie murmured, smiling. “She’s been longing to see you. She’d be ecstatic.”

“But her rest would be disturbed. I don’t want that. I’ll wait till morning.” He took one last look at the sleeping child then motioned for Connie to precede him down the stairs. “She looks well. And still crazy for bells?”

“Oh, yes.” Connie chuckled. “She’ll be delighted with the toy.” She motioned him to a chair at the counter and poured a mug of tea. “I’ll scramble some eggs.”

“Please, don’t bother. I can have toast. Or anything.”

“It’s no bother. I told Cora I’d do it, because she had to leave to attend a function for her granddaughter. In fact, I have to do it or she’ll punish me tomorrow. I don’t want that. Her cooking is to die for.” Connie grinned at him then set the pan to heat while she whipped the eggs and added onions, cheese and peppers. “Are you finished with the bridge?”

“You sound like Amanda.” He chuckled at her blink of surprise. “Yes, it’s finished. A month early, too. Tell me about Silver.”

Connie had been prepared to dislike this man. After all, he’d left his little daughter alone for several months to complete a job in some distant country. She didn’t see that as the sign of a doting father. But the eagerness in his question now had her reassessing her judgment. She knew nothing about the reasons Wade had left, and she didn’t trust the nasty hints Amanda had dropped. Not everyone was like her own father. Why did she have to keep reminding herself of that?

“Silver’s very bright. She seems to enjoy her gymnastics club, storytime at the library and her art class.”

“So she said. Clever idea, that video you sent. I should have thought of it before. I could have sent one back to her, shown her where I was working, what I was doing.” He frowned and then sipped his tea.

“Well, you can do that next time you go. She’ll love it.” Connie flipped the omelet onto a plate and set it in front of him.

“I’m not going again,” Wade said, with a stern finality, as if he thought she’d argue.

“Oh.” What were the implications of that? Would Connie’s job be over now that he was home? “Silver will be very happy you’re staying.”

“Mmm.” He ate for a few minutes, devouring the omelet and toast she set before him as if he hadn’t seen food in a long time. “Sorry.” He caught her staring and grinned. “I never eat on airplanes. Your cooking is very good.”

“They’re eggs. Hard to ruin.” She shrugged. “Cora said there’s cake. Would you like some?”

He nodded, and she cut a huge slice. Wade lifted a forkful of cake into his mouth, closed his eyes and groaned.

“Man, I’ve missed this.”

“Were there rough conditions where you were working?” she asked, trying to think of a way to ask if she should look for new employment.

“It was a work camp. Most of the labor was Argentinean so the kitchen tried to stick to their culturally familiar food. Delicious, but different.” Wade grinned. “I was more than ready for some good old American chow.” He finished the cake then set his dishes in the dishwasher.

“I could do that.”

“It’s done. Perhaps we can talk in the family room.” He lifted his cup and walked toward the big sunken room that overlooked the pool and the backyard. He waited for Connie to sit, then sank down in a larger chair. “On the video, Silver mentioned a Christmas play.”

“Yes. I’ve been taking her to church with me on Sundays. The Sunday school is putting on their usual nativity play. They’ve asked Silver to be one of the Christmas angels. She has a speaking part that she’s very excited about.” Connie frowned. “I hope it’s okay that I took her to church. Mr. Foster didn’t object and your—er—Amanda didn’t seem to care.”

“It’s fine,” he said. “I should have seen that she was going to Sunday school regularly. My father would have insisted on that.”

“Was he a godly man?” she asked curiously.

“My father thought God directed everything in a person’s life if they were committed to Him,” Wade told her, his face thoughtful. “I’ve been remiss in several areas where Silver is concerned, and church is one of them. I regret that.”

“Now that you’ll be staying home, I suppose I’m out of a job,” Connie said, summoning a smile.

“Why would you think that?” Wade regarded her with that dark probing gaze.

“Well, you’ll be here and…” Connie stopped, suddenly realizing that Wade had made no mention of taking over her duties with Silver. She should know by now that theirs was not a traditional father–daughter relationship.

“I’m going to be very busy finding enough staff to hire for our new job. And Silver still needs someone to look after her. Unless you haven’t enjoyed caring for her?” He raised one eyebrow.

“I love being with Silver,” Connie said with genuine satisfaction. “She’s a fantastic child, well behaved and so easy to teach. It’s been a pleasure to be here these past two months. You’ve done a great job raising her.”

“I can hardly take credit for that. Cora’s daughter cared for her when we first returned from Brazil. Then when she started her own family, she couldn’t manage it anymore so I hired a nanny for Silver, but—” He glanced up, his brown eyes intense in their scrutiny. “David may have explained the problem to you?”

“He said—” Connie blushed. “He said the nanny be came enamored of you.”

“Interesting way to put it.” His mouth twitched. “She thought she was in love with me. I have no time for love, Ms. Ladden.” He paused, watching for her response.

Connie wasn’t thrown by his comment. “Me, neither.”

“Oh? Why is that?” He leaned back, lifted his feet onto an ottoman. “If you don’t mind telling me?”

“I don’t mind. It’s in the past. I’ve put it behind me.” Which wasn’t quite true. Being dumped still smarted. “Six months ago I was engaged to be married,” she said quietly.

“I learned too late that my fiancé expected me to cut all ties with my family.”

“Oh?”

“After I finished school, I helped my foster mother care for my foster brother, a ten-year-old boy named Billy with terminal cancer. I thought Garret understood that I couldn’t just walk away from Billy simply because I got married. We’d talked about it. I believed he understood my position. Clearly, I didn’t appreciate his issues.”

Wade said nothing, but his mouth tipped down in a frown.

“I was at the church, ready to walk down the aisle when someone gave me a note. Garret had left town to go on our honeymoon by himself. He didn’t want to start our married life in second place, he said.”

“Selfish guy.”

“That’s what I thought. He wouldn’t have had long to wait,” she murmured, a flicker of sadness tweaking her heart. “Billy died two months later.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Me, too.” Connie tucked away thoughts of the precious little boy. He could have been her own child, so deeply had she loved him. “Anyway, my foster parents had put up a lot of money for the wedding—alot for them that is. I needed to get a job and pay them back.”

“So you came to Tucson. I see. But if you’ve enjoyed your work here, why even think of leaving?” He rubbed his temple as if trying to ease a muscle there. Tiredness revealed itself in the tiny fan of lines on the outside edges of his eyes.

“I guess I assumed that now you’re home you’d be more involved with Silver,” Connie said bluntly.

“I will be, as my time allows. But I prefer she have full-time care. That would be you, unless you’ve other plans?”

“No. Uh, I mean, I’m happy to stay on as her nanny.”

Actually it would be a relief. After leaving North Dakota, Connie had specifically chosen Tucson because she’d tracked her birth father here. Though she hadn’t yet had any success at finding him, she spent most of her free time searching. Until she figured out why he’d abandoned her when she was eleven, Connie knew she couldn’t remove the barrier that had kept her from totally adopting the faith her foster parents had taught her and trust God in the deepest recesses of her heart. Garret had ruined any hope she had of trusting a man again.

“After seeing that video, I know Silver is thriving under your care. I’d like to ensure she stays that way. Her happiness is very important to me.” The quiet words hung in the silence. Then Wade rose, his gaze pensive. “If you’ll excuse me now, I’ve had a long flight. I’m going to bed. Amanda’s gone out, but she’ll be back. Hornby’s still around?”

“Oh, yes. Though I doubt he’ll still be up.” Connie checked her watch then shook her head. “No, I’m sure he’s asleep now.”

“So he still likes to rise before the rest of humanity? Some things never change. I suppose he’s still fiddling with those roses of his?” Wade chuckled as he followed her from the room.

“Yes. He won first place in the horticultural show last month.” She indicated the snapshot she’d taken, which Silver had insisted on placing on the hall table. “Now he’s preparing for some kind of Christmas tour. He must have advised you or Mr. Foster about that?”

Wade laughed. Connie couldn’t help admiring how handsome he was when the stern lines around his mouth relaxed and his brown eyes lost their shadows.

“Hornby hasn’t advised me of his plans in years,” he chuckled. “He started here when my grandfather ran Abbot Bridges. I think he still sees me as a boy who’s barely tolerated in his precious gardens. Nothing changes for Hornby but his flowers.”

“His son visited him last week.”

Wade’s eyes opened wide. “Jared is back in town? I didn’t think he’d ever leave Australia. I’ll have to call him up.”

“Well, if you’ll excuse me?” Connie tried to step around him, but Wade’s hand on her arm stopped her.

“So, there won’t be any, um, situations, between us that you might mistake?” Wade asked, his gaze direct.

Connie had to smile.

“I’m not looking for a man,” she assured him and then realized that wasn’t quite true. “At least, I’m not looking for a husband,” she amended. “You don’t have to worry about my affections, Mr. Abbot. You’re quite safe.” Then she stepped awkwardly around him and hurried up the stairs to her room next to Silver’s, his “good night” echoing around her head.

As she sat in her window seat overlooking the backyard, Connie mused on the changes that would come. The Abbot home was large. The master wing was on the second floor, on the far side of the house, opposite Silver’s rooms and hers. The child might have very little contact with Wade unless Connie arranged otherwise.

“There’s a problem between the two of them, God,” she murmured, watching as Wade emerged on the pool deck ten minutes later. He walked back and forth across the deck, pausing at one end to inspect a bush, then resuming his private stroll. “Some barrier that I don’t understand. Help me to help them. Amen.”

She didn’t turn on the light, didn’t prepare for bed, as was her custom. Instead, Connie sat in the dark, watching Silver’s father pace across the yard, his steps barely slowing. When he finally sat on one of the chaise longues, the little clock on her nightstand read two thirty.

Yes, definitely something wrong. It wasn’t her business, but Connie wanted to help. She knew what it was like to face each day knowing your father didn’t care about you, had cut you out of his life. She couldn’t let that happen to sweet Silver.

Wade wasn’t uncaring. He’d made it a point to visit his daughter, check on her when he arrived home and even bring her a special toy. He’d asked about her welfare, said it was important to him that she be happy. He had to love her.

“He has to, God. Because I don’t want Silver to be like me.”

Wade climbed the stairs slowly, knowing he should stay away but needing to reassure himself one more time that Silver was all right, that nothing bad had happened to her in his absence. The reports he’d asked David to send were never enough to soothe his imagined anxieties. And the video Ms. Ladden had sent only made his yearning to be near the child that much stronger.

“Can you come home and see me in the Christmas play, Daddy? Please? I’m going to be an angel,” Silver had said in the video.

An angel. A gift from God—for him? That was the question.

He slipped through the partially open door and stood gazing down at the wonder that was Silver. From the moment she’d been born, he’d been overwhelmed by her, by the silver-gold hair that had never lost its fat curls, by her enormous blue eyes that peered up at him with utter trust, by the tiny hands that grasped his in complete confidence that he would not lead her astray.

And yet Wade had failed her. At least he felt he had. Though his heart ached to spill out the words of love that had built inside for the past four years, somehow they wouldn’t move past his lips.

Because since the day Bella had died, he’d been enslaved by fear.

Fear that Silver wasn’t his. Fear that someone else would claim her and he’d lose the only person in his life who truly mattered. Fear she’d never know how much he wanted to be the kind of dad she deserved. With his return home, those fears erupted anew. What had seemed so simple last week in Argentina—coming home, settling down, being a real father—now took on nuances and complications he hadn’t imagined.

Bella’s child.

Not his daughter, but Bella’s child.

As always, Wade’s mind traveled back to that day and the phone call that had turned his world on its axis. There had been a fire on a private yacht. A child had survived unharmed. A woman had died. Her death was a result of smoke inhalation, they said. The reason for the fire wasn’t known. When Wade arrived on the scene, he’d seen that beside Bella lay the body of the man she’d run to, the man with whom she’d been going to raise Silver.

The nightmare had shattered when Wade had heard the plaintive cries, pleas for someone to help. He recognized Silver’s howl immediately. She lay upstairs in her carrier, secured to a chair on the bow of the charred vessel, kicking and bawling at the top of her lungs, guarded by a firefighter. She was fine—unhurt but hungry. Wade had snatched Silver into his arms and left as quickly as he could. The next day he’d flown home.

But in four years, the startling clarity of one image from that day never left Wade’s brain, no matter how hard he’d tried to erase it—Bella’s man was a young blond-haired Adonis whose blue eyes stared lifelessly at him.

That man could have been Silver’s father. Silver, the child Wade would gladly give his life for if it would keep her safe and happy.

The beautiful blessed daughter he’d begun to doubt was his own.

Something wet dripped on Wade’s shirt and brought him back to the present. Tears. But what good did they do? How could he give up Silver? It would be like ripping out his own heart.

But what if Wade was wrong to keep her? What if he’d torn her away from cousins, aunts and grandparents who would dote on her, fill her life with love—something he had so much trouble showing?

“I can’t lose Silver, God. Don’t ask that of me. Please.”

God hadn’t answered Wade Abbot’s prayers in a very long time.