Читать книгу North Country Hero - Lois Richer - Страница 11

Chapter Two

Kyle rubbed his eyes, unable to dislodge memories evoked by the familiar aroma of his home. Tanned leather and Old Spice—it smelled of Dad, of happiness, of moments shared together. All of which were gone.

Emotion rose like a tidal wave. He fought for control.

When Kyle was younger, Churchill had been a fantastic adventure he’d embraced. Now it was just another problem in his life.

But for a moment, as the midmorning sun warmed Kyle through the window, the sensation of being loved enveloped him. He relaxed into that embrace. Comfort erased the pain of loss that dimmed everything in his world these days.

Home—without his dad? He closed his eyes and wept.

Moments later, footsteps treading up his stairs shattered his privacy. He rubbed his shirtsleeve across his face. The computer part. Of course.

“Come on in,” he called before they could knock.

Laurel preceded Sara into his kitchen. “Do you need more time?” Laurel scanned his face, then the empty tabletop.

“I haven’t looked yet.” He tore his gaze from the wall where a family photo hung. It had been taken six months before his mom’s death. “I was just sitting here—remembering.”

“You can help us out another time, when you’re more rested,” Laurel said in a gentle tone.

“I’m fine.” Kyle didn’t want to give Laurel any more chances to draw him into her program at Lives. He’d do this one thing for her now and then get on with his own life. He opened a door that had once been a pantry and nodded. “Yep, just as I thought.”

A small squeak of surprise made him glance over one shoulder.

Sara’s eyes were huge. She met his gaze, looked back at the shelves and said, “Oh, my.”

Finding her understatement hilarious, Kyle chuckled as he dug through his father’s accumulation of computer parts. “I told you Dad was a pack rat.”

“No luck, huh?” Laurel asked when he drew back from the cupboard.

“Not yet.” Kyle motioned to Sara. “Could you help me for a minute? I think the printer is on the bottom of this shelf. If you could hold up this box while I free it, I wouldn’t have to waste time unpacking all this junk.”

“Okay.” She moved beside him and followed his directions exactly.

With a tug Kyle freed the printer, but in doing so brushed against Sara. Assailed by a host of reactions, from the fragrance of her hair to the way one tendril caressed her cheek, to the fierce look she gave when he had to yank on the cord to free the end, he realized that asking for Sara’s help had been a bad idea.

He moved away, eager to put some distance between them and hopefully end his heart-racing response to her.

“Thanks.” He set the printer on the table and opened it.

“If you explained how to reinstall it, I wouldn’t have to drag you back out to Lives. Maybe I could do it myself,” Laurel said.

Kyle lifted his head and arched one eyebrow. From what he’d seen in her office earlier, Laurel Quinn’s aptitude did not lie in computers.

“Yeah.” Her face turned bright pink under his look. Laurel laughed. “You’re right. I haven’t got a clue.”

“I can do it in a matter of a few minutes,” he told her as he lifted out the part she needed. He deliberately didn’t look at Sara. “But you will have to bring me back home after, and I know you’re busy.”

“I’ve got almost everything ready to greet the first two boys, Barry and Tony.” Laurel’s eyes shone with expectation. “I’m hoping that while you and I are busy with the printer, Sara will start some of her fantastic cinnamon buns for tomorrow.”

“I can do that.” Sara, cheeks pink, looked away from Kyle. What was that about?

“I’ve got what we need.” He held up the tiny relay switch. “I’m ready to go.”

“Oh, Laurel, I just remembered. We’ll need to move those groceries so there will be enough room for everyone,” Sara said quickly.

Too quickly? Kyle searched her face. A puzzled Laurel opened her mouth, but Sara grabbed her arm and pulled, insistent. Frowning, Laurel stepped outside.

“Come out when you’re ready, Kyle,” Sara said, her voice a bit forced. “We’ll meet you at the car.”

And that was when Kyle got it. Sara knew the stairs gave him problems. She was keeping Laurel busy so he could navigate without feeling as if they were watching him.

Her thoughtfulness eased the knot of tension inside.

Sweet, thoughtful Sara. Why couldn’t he have met someone like her first?

Kyle shut down the wayward thoughts. He’d ruled out romance in Afghanistan the day he’d been dumped, and he wasn’t going to change his mind now. Anyway, Sara couldn’t care about him. How could she? He was a ruined shell with nothing to offer a woman. He couldn’t even figure out his own future.

Kyle shrugged on his jacket, shoved the printer part in his pocket and stood. He’d get this done and then move on to his own business. Sara was nice, sure. But there was no point in pretending her kindness was anything more than that.

Self-consciously he tromped down the stairs and walked to the car. Once again, Sara was seated in the rear seat, so Kyle sat in front. Once again, he filled in the drive’s silences with facts about Churchill. And once again, after he got the printer running, Sara served him her delicious coffee along with a sandwich and some kind of lemon cookie that melted in his mouth. As Kyle ate, he quashed his yearning to linger, to get drawn in by the warmth of Sara’s smile and forget the emptiness that awaited him at home. He couldn’t afford to forget that. His future wasn’t here in Churchill. God had made sure of that.

So finally he pushed back his chair, thanked Sara for the lunch and asked Laurel to take him home. Sara walked with them to the car.

“I’m glad to have met you, Kyle,” she said, hugging her arms around her thin waist, revealing the scars he’d noticed earlier. “I’ll be praying for God to bless you with a wonderful future.”

“Thanks.” He wanted to tell her asking God for anything was pointless but he didn’t. Instead, as they drove away, he voiced the other question that plagued him. “What is Sara’s story, Laurel? Why is she here in Churchill? She looks like she’ll blow away in the wind.”

“You’ll have to ask Sara. Suffice it to say that she deserves happiness and I hope she’ll find some here. She’s a wonderful person.” Laurel smiled at him. “So are you, Kyle. Anytime you want to fill in a few hours of your day, feel free to drop by. Lives Under Construction can always use another hand.”

“I know Marla told you I’d be interested in doing that,” Kyle admitted. “But the truth is, all I want to think about right now is cleaning up my dad’s place.”

Laurel patted his shoulder then swung the van into his driveway. “After you’ve had time to grieve, please visit us, even just for another cup of Sara’s coffee.”

“I’ll think about it,” Kyle said, knowing he’d do no such thing. He climbed out of the car. “Thanks again. See you.”

Kyle waited till Laurel’s car disappeared, then braved the stairs again. Inside, the house seemed empty, lonely. He flicked up the thermostat and sat down in his father’s recliner in the living room. A notebook lay open on a side table. He picked it up.

“Two weeks until Kyle comes home. Yahoo!” His father’s scrawl filled the page, listing things they’d do together. Kyle slammed the book closed.

Why? his heart wept. Why did You take him before I could see him again?

Suddenly he heard Sara’s words in his mind.

I’ll be praying for God to bless you with a wonderful future.

Well, Sara could pray all she wanted, but whether God granted her prayers or not, nothing could make up for the loss of his dad.

With a weary sigh he rose and thumped his way to the kitchen, where he sat down to deal with the stacks of mail someone had dropped off. For a moment, he wished Sara was here with him. Somehow he thought that smile of hers and the calm way she approached life would make facing his not-so-wonderful future a whole lot easier.

But of course, imagining Sara in his house was just a silly dream. And Kyle was well aware that it was time he let go of dreams and face reality.

* * *

“Laurel, what’s an ATV?” Sara shifted to allow the flames of the fireplace to warm her back.

“All-terrain vehicle. Like those big motorized bikes we saw this afternoon. Why?” Her friend stopped working on her sudoku puzzle to glance up.

“Kyle mentioned an ATV.”

“Well, we have an ATV here,” Laurel told her. “But I’m not sure you should try riding it without some lessons.”

“I’m sure I can walk anywhere I need to go. I’m looking forward to it.” Sara loved to walk. In the time since she’d been released from the Masters’ home, she’d discovered the freedom of going wherever she wanted, of turning around, of changing direction without having every movement scripted for her. That freedom was precious. Sara ignored Laurel’s next remark about winter being too cold for much walking. “Tell me about Kyle’s father.”

“His name was Matt, ex-military,” Laurel said. “I knew him a little—a very nice man, full of laughter. He and Kyle ran a tourist business together. Matt couldn’t go overseas when Kyle got hurt because he’d had a heart attack. He didn’t want his son to know. I think the hardest thing for Kyle to accept is that his dad isn’t here with him.”

“There’s a kind of reverence in his voice when he mentions his father.” Also an echo of utter loss that Sara couldn’t forget. “He must have loved his dad very much.”

Laurel stayed silent for a few moments “Sara, you’re not comparing the love they shared with— Well, you don’t think of your foster father as your dad, do you? Because the Masters are not in any way part of who you are. They tried to ruin you, but you were too strong. Now your heavenly Father has other plans for your future.”

“I wish I knew what they were.” Sara wanted to escape the misery she’d endured. But at night, when the darkness fell, those horrid feelings of being unloved returned.

Actually, they never quite left her. That was why she needed to find her birth family—to make newer, better memories.

“Hang on to the truth, Sara,” Laurel told her.

“The truth?” Sara wasn’t sure she knew what that was anymore.

“You are the beloved child of God. But you have to trust Him and be patient for His work to erase what the Masters did.” Laurel got up to press a kiss against the top of her head. “I love you, too.”

Sara squeezed her hand. But she waited until Laurel was busy making hot chocolate before she slid a sheaf of papers out of her pocket and studied them.

To find your birth parents we must have these forms signed and returned along with the fee and a copy of your birth certificate. This will initiate a search of our records.

So many times Sara had wondered about the mother who only came back to her in fragmented dreams. Who was she? Why had she put Sara into foster care? Why had she never come back? Didn’t she love Sara? Didn’t her father care that his daughter might need him?

In the past, Sara had come up with a thousand reasons why her parents had never come to retrieve her—fairy tales, happily-ever-afters, like the romance stories she loved reading.

But now she needed the truth. She wanted to find her parents, embrace them and let their love erase the past. She wanted to have what Kyle had lost—people who loved her always.

She wanted a forever family.

“Here you go, sweetie.”

“Thanks.” Sara hurriedly tucked her papers into her pocket before accepting the gigantic mug from Laurel. Laurel was as close to Sara’s ideal mother-fantasy as anyone had ever been, but even Laurel couldn’t fill her need for her mother’s love.

“Enjoy it.” Laurel smiled. “Savor this time alone because once the boys arrive it’s going to get mighty busy.” She sat in the chair across from Sara, her face serious. “Are you sure cooking here won’t be too much for you?”

“I’m sure.” Sara cupped her hands around her mug.

“Let me tell you a bit about each boy so you’ll be prepared.” Laurel gave a brief history, ending with the youngest and in Sara’s eyes the most vulnerable boy, Rod.

“I think I’ll like Rod.” Sara knew she’d like all of the boys. Kids were easy to love.

“I’m not telling you about them because I expect you to get involved with their programs,” Laurel said.

“Oh?” Sara frowned, confused.

“I hired you to cook for us because I know how great you are at it.” Laurel leaned forward. “But I want you to be free to do other things.”

“Like what?” Sara already had a to-do list. Finding her family was first.

“Sara, you lost most of your childhood being a servant to the Masters. All the years you should have been a kid were spent making sure the other foster kids were okay.”

“I had to do that,” Sara said simply.

“You shouldn’t have had to,” her mentor insisted. “You’re twenty-two. Have you ever taken time to think about yourself?”

“I managed.” Sara didn’t like to dwell on the past.

“Oh, my dear, you managed wonderfully. But now you have this time in Churchill and I want it to be your time. I want you to enjoy your life, find new interests. Make new friends.” Laurel’s voice softened. “I want you to focus on your future.”

Sara thought about Kyle, alone in his house with that awesome yard. Rod would be arriving tomorrow. The sprout of an idea pushed down roots in her mind. She tucked it away until she could consider it more thoroughly.

“I will focus on my future. But I need you to do something for me, too, Laurel.” Sara paused to assemble her thoughts. “I know I’m going to love it here. But I will only stay till Christmas. By then I believe God will have shown me what he wants me to do with my future.”

“Well...” Laurel inclined her head.

“No, I mean it. I know myself, Laurel. I’ll love it here, I’ll get too comfortable and I’ll want to stay. But you must ignore that, even if I ask you not to. You have to find someone else to take over for me after Christmas. Promise?” She leaned forward, her gaze intent on Laurel.

“If you insist,” Laurel finally agreed.

“I do. I thought about this a lot while I was going to cooking school. Our minister said that in order to be the person God intends us to be, we must discover what He wants us to do.” She leaned back, smiled. “That’s what I am going to do while I’m here in Churchill. I’m going to search for God’s plan for my future. So you cannot let me talk you into my staying.”

Laurel studied her for a long time before she nodded. “All right.”

“Now, what kind of things should I do while I’m here?”

“There’s a pool at the recreation center attached to the school. You could take swimming lessons,” Laurel told her. “Also, the school holds classes for anyone who wants to upgrade their education. You might want to look into that.”

“Yes, I do.” Sara didn’t feel compelled to explain. Though the Masters had claimed Sara was homeschooled, Laurel had revealed their lies.

Laurel understood how awkward and geeky Sara felt, how much she wanted to shed her “misfit” feelings and be like everyone else. That was why she read so much. But sometimes it wasn’t enough to just read about something. Her reaction to Kyle was a prime example. Nothing she’d read had prepared her for the instant empathy she felt for him.

“I’ll pray that God will reveal His plans to you, Sara, so you’ll be able to figure out what He wants for your future.”

Sara already knew what she wanted in her future. She wanted her family reunited.

“Could I take computer classes?” Sara asked.

“Why not? You’ll probably have to wait till fall for the new sessions, though. We’ll phone and check tomorrow. I’ll pray that God will reveal His plans to you so you’ll be able to figure out what you want for your future.” Laurel drew her into a hug.

She already knew what she wanted; she wanted her family reunited. But she closed her eyes and let her spirit revel in Laurel’s embrace. Somehow that triggered thoughts of Kyle. Hugs were new to her, but he was used to them. He’d had parents who loved him and showed it. She’d seen it in the photos on his kitchen wall. He came from a tight-knit happy family.

“I’m going to bed now,” Laurel said, releasing her. “You must be tired after that long train trip.”

“Oh, no. Riding on that train was like being rocked to sleep.” Sara could remember being rocked. Barely.

Laurel kissed her forehead. “Goodnight, sweetie.”

“Goodnight, Laurel.” Sara followed her, stepped into the room Laurel had given her earlier and gazed around. Her room. Space that belonged to her and her alone.

For now she had a home, just like Kyle.

Sara marveled at how far she’d come today. She loved Churchill from the moment she’d stepped off the train. Rough and wild, but brutally honest. Everyone seemed friendly—except for Kyle. An image of him sitting in his kitchen—exhaustion, agony and utter loss etched on his face—filled her thoughts. Sara could excuse his brusqueness because he’d been hurting, body and soul.

What she couldn’t excuse was the way she’d stared at him so admiringly.

“Stop thinking about him,” she scolded herself. “This isn’t a fairy tale. He’s a wounded veteran who lost his father. He’s none of your business.”

To dislodge Kyle’s face from her mind, Sara curled onto the window seat, seeking the rolling ribbons of northern lights her book had talked about. But Laurel said the approach of summer meant it would stay light well into the night, that Sara wouldn’t see the lights for months.

The northern lights, learning the computer—it seemed as though everything had to wait till fall. But she would only be here till Christmas. Would she find her family by then?

She had to. As soon as possible.

Reading had always been her escape as well as her education, but Sara now knew book knowledge wasn’t the same as actually living and experiencing. She was short on experience. That was why she always felt as if she was a step behind everyone else. But she would catch up; she would learn about love and families and all the things other people took for granted.

She tugged the papers from her pocket and began to fill them out. Tomorrow she’d visit Kyle, not only to discuss the idea she’d had earlier to help Rod, but because she didn’t want to wait until fall to learn how to use a computer. Maybe she could persuade Kyle to do an exchange—she’d clean his house or maybe cook him something and he’d teach her how to use a computer to search for her family.

Because her family was out there. Somewhere. Sara just had to find them. Then she would finally have somebody who loved her, somebody she could love back. She’d have the circle of love Kyle had always known to support her in doing whatever God asked of her.

“Please help me.” The prayer slipped from Sara’s lips as she peered into the growing gloom. “Please?”