Читать книгу Her Christmas Family Wish - Lois Richer - Страница 12
ОглавлениеGracie has her mother’s eyes.
With his animal patients well on the road to recovery, Wyatt’s mind was free to puzzle over Ellie’s words as he drove home. Wasn’t Ellie Gracie’s mother?
He pulled into his ranch, surprised by the warm glow he felt at seeing the house lights on as if to welcome him. He stood outside and paused a moment. In the twilight nothing looked amiss, as if this was a well-run hobby ranch instead of a work in progress. Still, Wyatt doubted his father would approve.
Inside the back door he inhaled the savory aroma of simmering beef. His stomach growled in response. Ellie walked toward him, a welcoming smile on her face.
“Hi. How’d things go?”
“Fine. The animal is recovering nicely.” He liked the way she’d bundled her silvery curls on the top of her head, leaving her pretty face and wide smile free for him to admire. “Everything okay here?”
“All quiet on the western front,” she said. “Cade zonked out a while ago.”
“I’ll just go check on him.” Wyatt washed first, then entered Cade’s room, smiling at the sight of his boy curled up and snoring. His heart squeezed almost painfully tight as he smoothed a hand against Cade’s dark head. “I love you, son,” he murmured. He drew the blanket tighter, his heart welling with thankfulness that God had entrusted this small being to him. “Sleep well.”
“I hope you don’t mind that I put Gracie on the bed in your spare room,” Ellie said when he returned to the kitchen. “I thought that way we wouldn’t disturb her, and you can eat in peace.”
“Very thoughtful, thanks. Speaking of eating... What is that tantalizing smell?”
“Oh, just some stew I made from that beef you had in the fridge.” She lifted a dish from the oven. “I hope that’s okay?”
“Yes, but—it’s very kind of you to go to all this trouble.” He licked his lips, slightly embarrassed when he realized Ellie was watching him. As her gaze held his he felt the intimacy in the room ramp up.
“I’m guessing you’re hungry.” Ellie’s wide smile brought a sparkle to her gray eyes like sunshine glinting off a granite rock.
“Starving.” He took out a plate and Ellie filled it with beef, potatoes and green beans.
“I made some biscuits, too.” She set them beside his plate.
“Biscuits?” He licked his lips. “I haven’t had those for ages.”
“Go ahead and eat. I’ll make some tea,” she said and immediately set the kettle to boil. “Do you cook?” She sat at the end of the breakfast bar, not far enough to break the friendly feeling but enough to give Wyatt some room.
“Oh, yes. My father was a firm believer that his kid should know how to fend for himself.” He scooped up some stew. No way was he going to spoil this meal by talking about his unhappy childhood. But Ellie had other ideas.
“Your mom didn’t mind you in her kitchen?” She rose as the kettle boiled.
“I never knew her.” He smeared butter on the feathery light biscuits and watched it melt before taking a bite. “These are fantastic. Everything is. Thank you.”
“I’m glad you’re enjoying it.” Ellie put the teapot and two cups on the counter. “Tanner told me your father was a well-known lawyer.”
Which meant they’d been talking about him. Wyatt didn’t like that, but he didn’t have time to dwell on it because Ellie was speaking again.
“You never had any desire to follow in his footsteps?”
“None. My first love has always been animals.” No point in elaborating or discussing the many reasons why he hoped he’d never become like his father.
“I saw how much you care for animals.”
Her comment shocked him. He stared at her, thinking that the flush of color on her cheeks suited her.
“I was walking Cade the other day when I saw you with that abused horse at Wranglers,” she mumbled, her head tilted down. After a moment she looked directly at him. “He was filthy and mangy, and yet you touched him so gently, as if he was the most precious animal. You’re a wonderful vet.”
“Well, I try,” he sputtered, a little surprised by the fervor of her words. Uncomfortable with her praise, he changed the subject. “Does that mean my son didn’t settle as easily as you claimed?”
“He was restless, needed some fresh air.” She shrugged. “He was fine.”
“I see. Well, thank you for that. And for babysitting tonight and for supper.”
“Oh.” A furrow formed on her wide forehead as she moved to the fridge and pulled out a bowl. “I almost forgot. Rice pudding?”
“My favorite.” Wyatt spooned some onto his almost clean plate, slightly unnerved by how intimate it suddenly seemed in the dim room with two sleeping children next door. How was he going to let her know he wasn’t interested in getting better acquainted? Although if he was honest with himself, he was curious about Ellie Grant.
He ate the pudding. “Delicious.”
“Good.” He saw her gaze swivel to focus on his wedding portrait. “Your wife was a very beautiful woman. Was she also a veterinarian?”
“Taryn?” Wyatt laughed as he scooped out a second helping of the pudding. “She was an interior designer. We were polar opposites. I’m country and she’s—she was,” he corrected automatically, “definitely city. The ranch was going to be our compromise. Only—” He bent his head.
“I’m so sorry for your loss, Wyatt.” Somehow the generous compassion in Ellie’s soft voice soothed his lingering hurt. “May I ask how she died?”
“A bunch of kids were joyriding and broadsided her car. The driver was underage and shouldn’t even have been behind the wheel.” As it always did, anger flared toward the teen. “He claimed it wasn’t his fault, but it was.” Wyatt stared at his hands, guilt welling inside. “It was also my fault.”
Irritated that he hadn’t yet found relief from the guilt of that awful day, Wyatt rose and loaded the dishwasher. He was fully aware that Ellie was watching every move with her all-seeing eyes, waiting. There was nothing else to do but explain. He poured two cups of tea and passed one to her.
“Taryn was out that night because of me. She should have been here, at home, with Cade. Instead she was running my errands.” He stopped to clear the rasp from his throat. “My son will spend every Christmas without his mother because I didn’t keep my promise.” He didn’t want to talk about the past anymore, so he turned the tables. “Why did you say Gracie has her mother’s eyes?”
“Because she does.” Ellie sipped her tea nonchalantly. She must have realized he didn’t understand, because she suddenly set the cup down and smiled. “Sorry. I forget sometimes that people don’t know our history. Biologically Gracie is my niece. My sister, Karen, was her mother. She died after Gracie was born and I adopted her a bit later.”
So Ellie, too, carried pain. Wyatt sat down on a stool to listen, curious about the arrangement.
“Karen was married to Kurt. She was four months pregnant when he was killed in an accident at work. Kurt was in construction. He was on the job site one day trying to secure everything in a windstorm when a structure collapsed and killed him.” Ellie sighed, her eyes tear-filled. “It was so hard for Karen to go on, but the pregnancy gave her courage. Then one day she phoned me in Chicago. She’d just found out she had brain cancer, and she’d decided to refuse all treatment in order to keep Gracie safe. I flew down to be with her. She died three months after Gracie’s birth.”
“Ellie, I’m so sorry.” Wyatt reached out to touch her hand where it lay on the counter.
“So am I.” Ellie glanced at his hand, then eased hers away. “Karen would have made an amazing mother. I’m just her stand-in. I promised her I’d do my best to be Gracie’s mom but—” She shook her head as tears rolled down her cheeks. “I think I’m failing.”
“How can you say that?” Uncomfortable with her tears but hearing the worry in her tone, he tried to reassure her. “Gracie’s a great kid. I think you’ve done amazingly well with her.”
“Then why isn’t it enough? Why does she keep searching for a father?” Ellie asked, her voice breaking. “I love her so much. I’ve tried to give her everything she needs, but I can’t give her a father!” She dashed away her tears, the gray irises darkening to slate. “There is no man in my life.”
“Because?”
“Because that’s the way it has to be.” Ellie’s cheeks bore dots of hot pink. “I was engaged, but that ended and I realized that God doesn’t want me to have a romantic relationship. He wants me to focus on being Gracie’s mom.”
“Maybe it was the breakup with your fiancé that triggered Gracie’s sudden interest in finding a daddy?” Wyatt privately thought her ex-fiancé must be an idiot to have let this woman go. “Maybe her hopes were dashed because she thought she was going to have a father like the other kids, and then she didn’t get him.”
“I don’t think that’s it,” Ellie said slowly. “Because looking back, I realize Gracie never called Eddie Daddy. She always called him by name. When I explained we weren’t getting married, she seemed okay with it. And she hasn’t seemed upset about it since then. She was very excited about starting school. That’s all she talked about.”
“Well, maybe Eddie gave Gracie a sense of, I don’t know, security? Maybe his male perspective is something she needs?” he said. “Is there someone else in your life who could take his place as a father figure?”
“But that’s what I’m saying. Eddie wasn’t a father figure in Gracie’s world,” Ellie protested.
“Maybe he was, and you didn’t realize it.” But even as he said it Wyatt found it hard to believe that Ellie could have missed something so important to her daughter. He’d seen just how caring and protective of Gracie she was. “Maybe there’s someone you could ask to act as a male role model for her?”
“No.” Ellie’s voice was firm and unhesitating. “Tanner and Pastor Jeff are the only influential males in her life right now, and their lives are full with their own kids.”
“Well, I’m no psychologist but...” Wyatt felt uncomfortable giving advice, but clearly Ellie wanted his opinion, and after all she’d done for him tonight, he could hardly throw up his hands and give up. “My guess is Gracie wants a closer bond with a man. Why? Maybe to show him off to her new school friends, maybe to have him take an interest in her that others haven’t, or maybe she wants someone special that she can confide in.”
“Why can’t she confide in me?” Ellie said with a belligerent glare. “I am her mother.”
“Did you tell your mother everything? Weren’t there some times when you wanted to share with someone else?” In his own life Wyatt had never shared his hopes and dreams with his father. He’d often wished he could, but knowing he’d be mocked had kept him silent.
“What does a little girl of five have to confide?” she asked.
“I have no clue.” Wyatt felt like he was digging his way out of a quagmire. “But maybe Gracie thinks you wouldn’t understand or that you’d try to dissuade her if she bared her heart. Or maybe she just needs perspective from another person.”
“Which means I’m not enough.” She looked so desolate that Wyatt hurried to reassure her.
“It doesn’t mean that at all. It just means that she’s growing up, expanding her world.” He was speaking off the cuff, praying he said the right thing, because he had no clue how little girls’ minds worked. “I don’t think this is about you, Ellie. It’s about her.”
“But what do I do? She prays every night for God to give her a daddy. And now that she’s met Cade, she’s added a brother to her Christmas list.” Ellie threw up her hands. “I can’t make her understand,” she wailed. “Sophie keeps telling me to pray about it and I am, but I’m not getting an answer and I need one because I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”
“‘If any man lack wisdom, let him ask of God.’” Wyatt shrugged. “I read that this morning. I guess you have to keep on God’s case, asking Him to show you how to proceed.”
“I guess.” Ellie sighed. “Gracie’s going to be heartbroken when a daddy doesn’t appear at Christmas.”
“Maybe I could talk to her a little, sound her out on what’s behind her request.” Wait a minute! What was he doing? He didn’t want to get involved.
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Wyatt, though I thank you.” Ellie nibbled on her lower lip. “Gracie’s already fixated on you as the daddy of her dreams. Maybe you’d only make it worse, make her believe you really are moving into her life.”
“I’d make sure she understands that I’m her friend, but I can’t be her daddy.” Wyatt had a lot more to say on the subject, including a warning to Ellie not to get the wrong impression about his offer. But he couldn’t say it because the phone rang. “It’s after hours. Let the machine pick up,” he said when Ellie glanced from the phone to him.
“Wyatt, this is Jim Harder at the Triple T. I’ve been trying to reach you for days. You promised you’d do those inoculations this week, and I’m still waiting. I can’t run a ranch like this. Call me tonight with a time to get it done in the next two days, or I’m looking for somebody else. I’d rather have you, but your hours are too erratic. I need a vet who gets here.”
In the dead quiet of the room Wyatt stared at the answering machine, ashamed that Ellie had heard but frustrated because he knew he was about to lose his most understanding client. Cade was sick. How could Wyatt have left him with some nanny and walked away? But he also needed the work the Triple T offered. They had the biggest herd around. The income from that call alone could pay off some of Wyatt’s bills.
“What are you going to do?” Ellie whispered.
“I don’t know.” He raked a hand through his hair, trying to come up with a plan. “I guess I could do the inoculations in bunches. It would take me a few days, but I could do it. But Cade’s sick with this cold—” He shook his head. “I just don’t know.”
She studied him for several moments, saying nothing, dealing with her own private thoughts.
“We both need to pray for wisdom, I guess,” she sighed after a few moments had passed. “Right now I have to get Gracie home. Thanks for letting me cry on your shoulder, Wyatt.”
“I thought it was the other way around.” He followed her into the bedroom, watching as she lifted a sleeping Gracie into her arms.
“She’s too heavy for you,” he said. “Let me take her.” He didn’t wait for Ellie’s permission but instead scooped Gracie from her arms into his, smiling when the child’s eyes fluttered open.
“Hi, Daddy,” she murmured, then fell back asleep.
Wyatt met Ellie’s gaze without saying anything. He followed Ellie out to her car and set Gracie in her car seat, then drew back so Ellie could fasten the seat belt, his mind working furiously.
“Listen,” he blurted when she emerged from the car and had closed the door. “I have an idea. What if I spend some time with Gracie, just to clear up this daddy notion of hers?”
“In exchange for what?” Ellie’s eyes searched his face.
“For you watching Cade for a few hours.”
The look on her face told him she was about to reject his idea, so he rushed on. “I’ll arrange for a nanny to come every morning as you suggested and handle office calls then. But I have to spend time working my ranch. If you could watch Cade for a couple of hours in the evening, I could get a lot done. Then maybe I’d be able to see more clients here.”
“But the evenings, before bedtime, those are special daddy moments you shouldn’t miss with Cade,” she protested.
“Something has to give, Ellie.” He hated admitting that. “I have to work and keep up our home.”
“I know.” She glanced down at Gracie, then back to him. Her lips tightened as if she wrestled with a decision, then she nodded. “What if I come over after I finish work at Wranglers Ranch? Gracie’s finished school by then. We could stay with Cade, maybe make dinner, and then you’d be free to bathe him and put him to bed. Would that work?”
“It would.” Wyatt slowly nodded while every brain cell in his head screamed a warning.
“I have just one condition,” Ellie added, her voice deadly serious.
“Name it.” Then he’d tell her his condition.
“You have to agree that this is simply an arrangement between friends and nothing more. I’m not looking for a father for Gracie or a relationship for myself. I need you to be clear on that, Wyatt. Strictly friends.”
“Agreed,” he said with a nod, relief swelling. “I don’t want any romantic entanglements either. I want help with Cade, and I promise to do my best to help Gracie.” He grinned at her and thrust out his hand. “Deal, friend?”
Ellie took her time but finally she shook hands with him. “Deal, friend.”
Wyatt stood there, in the dimness of twilight, holding her soft hand, staring into her lovely face, and wondered if he was making a mistake.
“I have to go.” Ellie pulled her hand free and got into her car. She started it, then rolled down the window. “Beginning tomorrow?”
“Sounds good. We’ll be here.” He waved as she drove away until the twinkle of her red taillights had disappeared. Then he walked inside his house and checked on Cade.
Satisfied his son was sleeping peacefully Wyatt returned to the living room and let his gaze rest on his wedding photo. The same old lump of bitterness toward the youth who had caused Taryn’s death burned inside his gut. If not for that kid his wife would be here and Wyatt’s world would be fine.
Only it wasn’t fine because he’d kept breaking his promises.
“That’s not going to happen again,” he told her, his shoulders going back. “I’m focusing on Cade first. Everything else comes second. I promi—”
Wyatt stopped himself from saying it. No more promises. Turning away he lifted a sleeping Mr. Fudge from his recliner and, after a quick trip outside, locked him in the laundry room to stay safe overnight.
As he walked past the kitchen to his office to work on his accounts, Wyatt caught a whiff of Ellie’s spicy fragrance. He sat down at his desk thinking of her. She was a focused, determined woman, and she cared deeply for her daughter. She would be an amazing caregiver for Cade, and Wyatt was certain she had no designs on him.
But what was he going to do about Gracie and her “daddy” quest?