Читать книгу An Accidental Mom - Loree Lough - Страница 10

The four-year-old wrapped an arm around his father’s leg. “Daddy,” he said, tugging at the pocket of his father’s sports coat, “why do people come to the simmy-terry?”

The day was as gray as Max Sheridan’s mood, and Nate’s questions did nothing to improve it. He looked into the innocent, brown eyes and smiled despite himself. Oh, but he loved this kid! “To visit loved ones, Nate. To pay our respects to people who have died.”

Nate knelt in the damp grass. One by one, he placed the white roses he’d chosen at the flower mart at the feet of the marble angel guarding his mother’s grave. “Mommy isn’t in there.” He spoke with conviction. “Only her bones. Her soul is in heaven with God.”

He stood and pressed close to his father. “Right, Dad?”

Max inhaled deeply. “Yes, Nate.” He’d told bedtime stories to soothe the boy to sleep; how different was this white lie? He’d tried believing in God, in miracles. Well, if God truly existed and He could perform miracles, he and Nate wouldn’t be here at Melissa’s grave, now would they?

For a long time, Nate merely stared at the tombstone. “She isn’t cold, you know….”

Nate had been too young when Melissa died to have any real memory of her. He seemed to have no recollection of those bleak days in the funeral parlor, when friends and relatives speculated about why a beautiful woman with so much to live for would take her own life. If there had been a God to thank for that, Max would have prayed himself hoarse. Max had only brought Nate to Peaceful Gardens twice, and each visit inspired new curiosities—and childlike observations about death, dying and the afterlife—in his son.

“…because the tempa-chure in heaven is always a pleasant seventy-five degrees.” Nate’s beaming face told Max how proud he was to have remembered that tidbit of information.

Max chuckled. He was something else, this kid of his. “Where’d you hear that?”

“Gramma Georgia tol’ me so, on the phone yesterday when I tol’ her we were coming here to say goodbye to Mommy. She said Mommy will always be warm and happy, ’cause everything is perfect up in heaven.”

If God didn’t exist, then neither did heaven. But Max smiled. He saw no point in tarnishing the boy’s image of…things.

Even Max didn’t understand why, when in all other areas he’d been a no-nonsense, tell-it-like-it-is parent. Fairy tales were stories, nothing more. Santa and the Easter Bunny were invented to put money into the pockets of the greeting card manufacturers. The tooth fairy? The lazy parents’ way of coaxing their kids to brush and floss. Far better to extinguish his son’s belief in fantasies like that than to let him grow up and find out how painful and unrelenting the real world could be.

Strangely, though, he was less rigid when it came to matters of religion, spirituality and faith. If Nate wanted to attend Sunday school with his school chums, fine. If he wanted to tag along when the neighbors attended services, so be it. Nate got so much out of the whole “church thing” that Max couldn’t bring himself to put an end to it. Something, though, told him that the longer he waited to teach the boy the truth as he saw it, the more difficult it would be.

“Is Gramma full of beans?”

Laughing, Max took Nate’s hand. Where did the kid come up with this stuff? “’Course not, son.”

Nate’s face crinkled with confusion. “But, Dad, you said so yourself, just last night, ’member?”

Yes, he remembered, only too well. He’d been on the phone with his mother, discussing the trip to Amarillo, when she started with her usual “bless this” and “pray for that” nonsense. Max’s day had been bad enough to that point; being forced to listen to her spiritual malarkey was the proverbial straw on the camel’s already overloaded back. “If your precious Lord is so merciful,” he’d demanded, “why’d He allow Melissa to take her own life? Why’d He let you—a woman who devoted her whole life to Him—break your leg?”

“I didn’t raise you to talk like that!” Georgia had scolded. And when she started praying for his salvation, he’d put a hand over the phone and closed his eyes. “Mom,” he’d muttered, “you’re full of beans.”

And that’s when he’d noticed Nate, standing in the doorway.

“I was only teasing,” Max had whispered past the phone’s mouthpiece. “Besides, Gramma didn’t hear me.”

But Nate’s doubting expression said he believed otherwise.

Now, Nate stood and brushed freshly mowed grass clippings from the knees of his jeans. “You gonna say goodbye to Mommy, Dad?”

Closing his eyes, Max held his breath and summoned the strength to go through the motions…for Nate. He’d tried to say goodbye to Melissa, for even as the EMTs struggled to save her, they’d known she was dying. Instead, he’d struggled to keep a lid on his temper. Max couldn’t remember being more angry with her. He hadn’t understood why she left Nate then, and he didn’t understand it now…nearly three years later.

The very people who, when he was a boy, taught him that suicide was one of the most grievous sins a human could commit, also believed that God in His heaven had total control over things on earth, that He loved every last person. If that was true, why did some of His “children” die of starvation, while others became victims of genocide and war? Why did good people get cancer, while bad people robbed and raped and pillaged?

Despite all that, their simple faith seemed to bring them such joy, such solace. Nate—more than any of them, Max believed—deserved to grow up feeling that way. At least until life stepped in and taught him otherwise in its usual fist-to-jaw way.

“You gonna say a prayer for Mommy?”

Prayer. Of all the— Groaning inwardly, Max shaded his eyes. “Tell you what,” he said from behind his hand, “why don’t you say the prayer this time.”

“Me?” Nate’s brown eyes widened. “Thanks, Dad! I’ll do a good job. I promise.” He got down on his knees and bowed his head, then he closed his eyes and pressed both palms together, fingers pointing skyward. “God? It’s me, Nathan Maxwell Sheridan. Um, me an’ my dad won’t be comin’ to visit my mom here at the simmy-terry for a while, on accounta my gramma busted her leg an’—”

“Broke her leg,” Max corrected gently. He didn’t see much sense in correcting the “for a while” part.

“…on accounta Gramma broke her leg, an’ we’re going to Texas to take care of her ’til she can walk again. So, God? Could You do me a favor? I know my mom’s soul is up there in heaven with You, so maybe You could tell her not to worry ’bout her bones an’ her wedding ring an’ stuff while we’re gone, ’cause the men who work here take real good care of the place. Thanks.” Nate started to get up, then changed his mind. Eyes squinted tight-shut again, he added, “And, God? Please send another wife for my dad…and a mom for me. We really, really need one. Amen.”

On his feet again, Nate put his hand into Max’s. “How was that, Dad? Did I do good?”

Max swallowed the hard lump that always formed in his throat when Nate prayed for a new mom. It was only natural, he supposed, that even though Nate didn’t remember Melissa, he’d yearn for a mother’s love. But he was doing okay by the boy, wasn’t he? Hadn’t he learned to cook—a little? Hadn’t he taught himself to do laundry—sort of? He’d figured out every gizmo on that fancy vacuum cleaner of Melissa’s—hadn’t he? And tough as it had been to go it alone, he hadn’t missed a single Parents’ Night at Nate’s school. What did they need a woman for!

Max hoisted his son, held him close. “You did great with that prayer, kiddo, just great. Now what-say you and I head over to the burger joint. We have enough time for chicken fingers and curly fries before we head out.”

Nate kissed Max’s cheek. “You’re the best, Dad. Almost as good as havin’ a mom and a dad!”

Almost as good, Max thought, but not quite. Sad fact was, Nate would never have it “as good”—at least, not in the mom department, because Max had made a promise to himself when Melissa died.

And he aimed to keep it.

“Well, as I live and breathe,” Georgia said, slapping the arm of her wheelchair. “If it isn’t Lily London!”

“Oh, my!” Lily said, pointing at the woman’s cast. “What have you done to yourself?”

The redhead smiled. “One leg too few in a three-legged race?”

“Don’t let her pull your leg, Lily,” the fry cook called over the counter. “Genius Georgia was changing lightbulbs…on a stool with wheels.” He raised floured hands and shook his head. “Again!”

Georgia waved his comment away. “Oh, put a lid on it, Andy.” As an aside to Lily, she added in a loud whisper, “That man doesn’t know what he’s talkin’ about.”

“I know what I saw,” Andy argued.

Lily scooted a chrome and vinyl-padded chair nearer to Georgia’s wheelchair. “Is that cast as uncomfortable as it looks?”

“Nah. Hardest part about wearin’ this thing,” she said, knocking on the toes-to-thigh plaster, “is not being able to get around like I’d like to.”

“How long ’til you’re back on your feet?”

“Ten weeks. Eight, if I’m very, very good.” Georgia tucked a red curl behind her ear. “One good thing came of it, though.”

“In other words,” Andy tossed in, “ten weeks. Probably more!”

Georgia feigned a frown. “Funny man. Maybe we oughta get you a gig at the local comedy club.”

Lily helped herself to a cup of coffee. “Can I get you some?”

“Had my quota for the day, thanks.”

“So, what’s the ‘good thing’ to come of your broken leg?”

“Max is coming home,” Georgia said, beaming. “And he’s bringing little Nate with him!”

Lily felt as though her heart had plummeted into her stomach. Max? Coming back to Amarillo? She put her coffee on the counter, afraid her trembling might cause her to spill it. “When…um…when will Max be here?”

Georgia glanced at her wristwatch. “They called from the road not half an hour ago, so they should roll in here any—”

The door burst open and a small boy with curly brown hair exploded into Georgia’s diner. He was the spitting image of Max, right down to the adorable dimples bracketing his wide grin.

“Gramma!” he squealed, arms outstretched as he ran toward Georgia. “Gramma, we’re finally here!”

Georgia hugged him tight, then held his rosy-cheeked face in her hands. “Lemme have a look at my favorite grandson,” she said, pressing a noisy kiss to his chin.

Giggling, Nate said, “How can I be your favorite grandson when I’m your only grandson?” He swiped at the spot his grandmother had kissed. “And second, how can you have a look at me while you’re kissin’ me!”

His grandmother hugged him again. “Four-year-old genius,” she told Lily, “just like his daddy. Yes’m. That’s my boy!”

She glanced toward the door. “Speaking of which, where is your daddy?”

“Parking the car.” Nate’s eyes widened. “You should see all the squished bugs on the front bumper. Must be a million of ’em!”

As Georgia laughed, Lily smiled self-consciously. She had to get out of here, fast, because it would be only a matter of seconds before the genius’s father followed him into the diner. And she had no desire to see Max Sheridan again, not after—

“Actually,” Nate added, “it isn’t ’zactly a car. It’s an Ess Yoo Vee. It’s big and red, like a fire truck. He bought it right before you busted your leg.”

“Broke my leg,” Georgia corrected. “I still think you and your dad should have flown into town, saved all those hours on the road. Especially considering there’s a perfectly good car in the garage that he could’ve—”

“I’m a pencil pusher, not Mr. America,” interrupted a teasing baritone. “What makes you think I could steer that boat of yours?”

It was Max, looking more gorgeous than Lily remembered. Tall and broad-shouldered, he seemed more at ease with himself than when she’d last seen him, more manly and mature. Marriage had done that to him, she supposed. Marriage and fatherhood.

Lily swallowed the lump of jealousy that formed in her throat and asked God to forgive her pettiness, because much as she’d wanted to be the one at his side when those things happened, he’d chosen someone else.

“Max!” Georgia waved him over. “C’mere and give your old fat mama a great big hug!”

He crossed the room in three long strides and bent to wrap his mother in a warm embrace. “First…you’re not fat.”

“I hope you’re gonna say ‘Second…you’re not old.’” She gave him a playful poke in the ribs.

“Do you see ‘Fool’ tattooed to my forehead?” He assumed a serious stance and a pious expression.

They enjoyed a laugh, then Georgia said, “You know my motto.”

“‘God and Nature have decreed that I will age,’” Max quoted, “‘…but I refuse to get old!’”

He crouched beside the footrest of her chair. “So, let’s have a look at this leg of yours.”

While Max inspected his mother’s cast, Lily did her best to sneak out of the diner unnoticed.

“Stop right there!” Georgia hollered.

Lily froze in her tracks, only too aware that all eyes were now on her. Caught in the act!

“Where d’you think you’re going, young lady? You can’t leave ’til you put your John Hancock on my leg!”

Feeling the heat of a blush creep into her cheeks, Lily moved woodenly toward the wheelchair. “Sorry,” she said, accepting Georgia’s felt-tipped pen. “Where would you like me to—”

“Daddy,” interrupted Nate’s hoarse whisper. He tugged at his father’s hand. “She’s bee-yoo-tee-ful!”

Lily chanced a quick glance in Max’s direction. Now he was blushing. Her heartbeat doubled when he met her eyes and smiled that oh-so-tantalizing half grin that had captivated her years ago. She’d changed a lot since he left for Chicago; she hoped he wouldn’t recognize her.

He got to his feet. “Lily? Lily London?”

Yeah, she thought bitterly, it’s me. The silly little twit who used to tag along behind you like a well-trained puppy, hoping for a pat on the head. She plastered what she hoped was a sophisticated smile on her face and tried to sound composed.

“How are you, Max?”

How long had it been since she last saw him? Five years? No, six…if she didn’t count the tens of thousands of times she’d pictured him in her dreams. Six long years since he’d left Amarillo—with his blushing bride on his arm.

“Wow. Look at you! I hardly recognized you. It’s great to see you.”

If he’d given her a thought at all in all these years—which was doubtful—he’d probably pictured her in braces and a ponytail, and carrying an armload of books. Surely the change hadn’t been that drastic, so why was he staring at her as if she had a third eye in the middle of her forehead?

Lily broke the intense eye contact by pretending to recap the pen, but ended up stabbing her palm with the point, instead.

She stifled an ouch, as Georgia said, “Who’da thunk that skinny freckle-faced li’l gal would grow up to be such a knockout!”

Nate took a step closer and smiled up at her. She’d heard through the grapevine that Max and Melissa had had a son. Mostly, she’d tried not to think about the fact that Max had started a life with someone other than her, because she’d loved him almost from the first moment they’d met—when she was a knobby-kneed seventh grader and he’d been Centennial High School’s star quarterback.

“Hi,” the boy said. “My name is Nathan Maxwell Sheridan. Max, here, is my dad. I’m very pleased to make your awk-a-ah…”

“Acquaintance,” his father helped.

“That’s it,” Nate said, nodding, “‘acquaintance.’” He looked up into Lily’s face. “What’s your name?”

“Her name is Lily,” Georgia said. “Lily London.”

“Sounds like a movie star’s name.” He furrowed his brow. “But I thought a lily was a flower.”

“It is,” Lily said, shrugging. “My mother’s name was Rose, see, so I guess she thought it would be neat to name my sisters and me after flowers.”

Nate giggled. “That’s pretty funny.” He giggled again. “What’re your sisters’ names?”

“The twins are Ivy and Violet, and there’s Cammi…which is short for Camellia.”

He narrowed his big, black-lashed eyes. “They’re nice names, but I like Lily best.”

A person would have to be made of stone not to warm to this child, she admitted, mirroring his friendly grin. “Well, thanks, Nate,” she said, shaking his extended hand. “And I’m pleased to make your acquaintance, too.”

He jerked a thumb over his shoulder. “My dad here could sure use a wife. See, my mom died when I was a baby. He does pretty good, considering he’s not a lady, but he sure could use some help. So…are you married?”

Georgia chuckled under her breath as Max slapped a hand over his eyes and gave a loud sigh.

Lily found herself enjoying his discomfort, perhaps a little too much. “I’m afraid I’m a little too busy to…help your dad out. I have a job. Two, in fact.”

His brows nearly met in the center of his forehead. “Wow. Two jobs?” he said, stuffing both hands into his pants pockets.

As if on cue, Max did the same thing, Lily noticed. It was obvious the two spent a lot of time together, because Nate had also picked up Max’s tendency to say “first” this and “second” that. Maybe Nate hadn’t been too far from the mark when he’d said Max was an okay parent.

“I’m an animal rehabilitator,” she told the boy. “And I manage my father’s ranch.”

Nate’s brow furrowed. “What’s that?”

“She nurses sick and injured animals back to health,” Max explained, “then takes them back where they came from.” To Lily, he added, “Sorry. He’s a great kid, but sometimes he talks too much.”

She was about to agree that Nate was a great kid and add that Max had nothing to apologize for, when Nate said, “Your dad has a ranch? With horses and cows and stuff?”

Lily smiled again. “He sure does.”

“Man, I’ve never been on a real-live ranch before. They don’t have ’em in Chicago, y’know.”

She glanced at Max. He’d grown up in cattle country; why hadn’t he taken the boy to see his buddies’ homes during visits to his mother?

“Are you a vettin-air-yun?”

“No, Nate, but I do work very closely with one.”

He crossed both arms over his chest. “I’m gonna be a vettin-air-yun when I grow up, ’cause I like animals.”

“Do you, now? Do you have a cat or a dog?”

Nate shot his father a less-than-friendly look. “Dad says I’m not old enough to be ’sponsible for a pet.”

“Well, maybe you’d like to come out to our ranch sometime, see my animals.”

Nate gasped. “Really? I could do that? Cool! What kind of animals!”

“Oh, a raccoon and a wolf cub, an eagle, some hawks, three monkeys and—”

“Monkeys! Way cool! Dad, I wanna—”

One look into his father’s stern face was enough to silence the boy. Lily couldn’t help but wonder why Max would have a problem with Nate visiting River Valley. It was the most natural thing in the world for a city boy to get enthused about the prospect of seeing animals up close, especially if his only prior contact had been at Chicago’s Brookfield Zoo!

Lily knew that if she didn’t get out of there fast, she’d likely say something she’d regret. “Where should I sign?” she asked Georgia, pen poised above the cast.

Georgia pointed, and Lily scribbled Get Well Quick! above her signature. “I’d love to stay and chat,” she fibbed, handing Georgia her pen, “but I have a million things to do.”

“You got any kids?” Nate asked.

“No,” Lily told him. “But with two jobs, I don’t have time to properly take care of children.” She didn’t tell him that not being able to make her “wife and mommy” dream come true was one of the most disappointing and heartbreaking facts of her life. The lump that formed in her throat surprised her.

And before any of them could say another word, she headed for the door. “Bye,” she called over her shoulder. “See you all later.”

Not! she tacked on as the door hissed shut behind her. At least, not if she had anything to say about it!

During the drive back to the ranch, Lily’s cell phone rang. “There’s a dog doing its best to keep from drowning in Lake Meredith,” her sister said. “I heard two small-craft pilots talking about it, listening to my CB radio. They’ve been hovering overhead for a couple minutes. Don’t know how long the poor thing has been down there. If someone doesn’t do something for it soon, one of ’em is gonna put it out of its misery—with a rifle!”

The mental picture of a dog paddling like mad to stay afloat, while sharpshooters zeroed in on it, made Lily’s heart flinch. Ordinarily, she didn’t specialize in household pets but this was hardly an ordinary circumstance. “Okay, all right, calm down before you fall down,” Lily said, making a quick U-turn on Route 40. “I’m on my way. Meanwhile, get back on that CB of yours and see if you can reach those guys. Tell the trigger-happy one to keep the safety on his weapon. I’ll be there in less than an hour.”

She’d witnessed situations like this before, and knew that unless the dog had been injured, it could stay afloat for an amazingly long time. Over the years, people had taken to calling her Snow White because of her talent for communicating with animals. She hoped the gift would help her coax this poor pup to the shore before…

Taking the exit onto Route 136 and heading north to the small town of Fritch, Lily forced the horrifying image from her mind. Lord, get me there fast, she prayed. “Say, Vi…”

“Hmm?”

“I’ve always wondered…why do you have a CB radio in your shop?”

Violet laughed. “Well, originally I got it to keep track of deliveries. If a deliveryman called to say he was stuck in traffic, I’d know within minutes if he was telling the truth or feeding me a line of baloney. Didn’t take long to weed the dishonest ones from those I could trust.”

Grinning, Lily waited for the “other” reasons.

“I realized pretty quick it’s also a great place to catch up on local gossip. And I find out when a bus-load of tourists is rolling in at Georgia’s. One quick trip to the diner, one quiet mention of all the good deals across the street at my boutique, and I have all the business I can handle ’til the bus rolls out again.”

Lily couldn’t help but smile. “So much for the ‘dumb blonde’ adage. You’re one of the savviest businesswomen I’ve ever known.”

She listened to the heavy silence for a few seconds before saying, “Vi? You there?”

“Yeah. I was just thinking about that poor dog.”

Nodding, Lily said, “Me, too. But don’t worry. I’ll do everything I can to save it.”

“’Course you will. Why do you think I called you as soon as I heard about it!”

“I only hope the mutt is wearing tags, so I can reunite him with his owner fast as I can. This whole ordeal will be traumatic enough without being separated from loved ones.”

“Well, a customer just walked in. Call me later, let me know how things turned out.”

Lily hung up, hoping that when “later” came, she wouldn’t have to tell her sister she’d been forced to take the dog home. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d taken in a lost dog or cat, and experience had taught her it wouldn’t be the last. Whether bringing the animal back to its former healthy state took months or days, every situation lasted only long enough to roust out a good family to adopt the pet. But regardless of how much or how little time and energy she invested in the creatures, Lily always experienced a period of mourning while she adjusted to life without the furry critter.

Nate Sheridan came to mind, with his big brown eyes and mop of dark curls. If she managed to save the dog and couldn’t find its owner, maybe…

Of course, that would require direct contact with Max. Lily’s heart beat double time at the mere thought. Clucking her tongue, she whispered through clenched teeth, “Get a grip, girl.” Because, really, what could happen between them in the few minutes it would take to get his permission to introduce Nate to the rescued dog?

“You’re getting way ahead of yourself, Lily.” She had no idea what kind of dog was splashing around for its life, no clue what condition it might be in by the time she reached it. A glance at her dashboard clock told her she’d been on the road less than fifteen minutes; it was nearly an hour’s drive to the entrance gate at Lake Meredith.

It dawned on her suddenly that she hadn’t asked Violet where the pilots had seen the dog. Acres of water made up this stretch of the park.

She reached for her cell phone, punched in her sister’s code. “Hey, kiddo…it’s me,” she said when her sister answered. “I didn’t think to ask earlier, but did those pilots mention where they spotted the dog?”

“I remember something about the boat dock. They thought maybe the dog had fallen off a sailboat or something.”

“But who’d go boating at this time of year?”

“I know I wouldn’t want to waste a nice day like this if I’d sunk a hundred grand into a sailboat.”

Violet made a good point, Lily admitted. The weather had been remarkably balmy for October, these past few weeks. “Did you manage to raise either of them on your CB?”

“No. We must be on a weird frequency. I’m hearing them fine, but they didn’t respond to me at all.”

Just great! Lily thought. Chances were pretty good that the sharpshooter who’d talked himself into believing he’d be doing a good deed by “putting the dog out of its misery” might actually take aim…and pull the trigger!

“Thanks, Vi. I’d better step on it. I’m still forty-five minutes away. I’ll call soon as I know something,” she said, and hung up.

“Please, God,” she said aloud, “watch over that pup. Give him the strength he needs to hang on ’til I get there.”

Maybe she should phone Georgia, so she and Nate could join in her prayer. No, the kid would get his hopes up. And knowing how much danger the dog was in would only worry him. Besides, if she didn’t reach the lake in time, his little heart would break, and for what? Lily knew only too well how much it hurt to lose an animal, any animal.

“Help me, Lord….”

What if she phoned ahead, told the rangers at the gate who she was! If she described her car and explained the urgency of her mission, they’d let her through without stopping.

Lily said a quick thank you to the Almighty for the idea and grabbed the phone again, dialed the number she’d memorized ages ago—and stomped on the gas.