Читать книгу A Mom For Christmas - Lorraine Beatty - Страница 10

Chapter One

The air in the enclosed stairwell reeked of age, and the timeworn wooden stairs creaked with each step. The glass in the old-fashioned door rattled in protest when Bethany Montgomery grasped the knob and pushed it open.

She stepped from the narrow staircase leading to her apartment above her mother’s real estate office and inhaled deeply. Even here in the broad recessed entry of the downtown building, the air was tinged with the scent of degrading metal and aged wood. The tiny black-and-white octagonal tiles on the floor from over a hundred years ago completed the picture. Everything in her hometown of DoOver, aka Dover, Mississippi, was old. And at the moment she felt the same. Old, worn-out and irrelevant. And in need of a major do-over.

Unlocking the door to the right, she entered the office of Montgomery Real Estate, her mood sinking another level. She didn’t want to be here. Not in Dover, not in the office and not in Mississippi. Her life was in New York, dancing with the Forsythe Ballet Company as principal ballerina for the last six years. She’d been living her lifelong dream, the culmination of a journey started when she was five and her mother had taken her and her sister to see a production of The Nutcracker in New Orleans.

Now it was all gone. Ended by a torn ACL complicated by years of overuse and damage she’d paid little attention to. Her neglect had finally caught up with her. There would be no lead roles from here on, and even a spot in the corps de ballet was doubtful. Instead she was forced to come home and work for her mother. The doctors and physical therapists had all declared her days of classical ballet over.

She refused to accept that. Others had recovered from this kind of injury and gone on to perform for years. She would be like them and she wouldn’t stop working until she was on stage, en pointe, and once more at the top of her profession.

Beth switched on the lights, booted up the computer and scanned the small office, her gaze landing on the wall of family photos. Her throat tightened as she looked at her portrait. It was her first professional photo, and she was dressed in a white tutu, en pointe posed développé croisé devant, looking like a graceful bird. Absently she rubbed her leg, remembering the pain of the last nine months and that moment when she’d landed and heard the horrible popping sound in her knee.

Her heart dropped into her stomach, leaving a cold emptiness in its place. How was she supposed to go on from here? What was she supposed to do with her life? A sob formed in her chest, but she fought it down. She’d cried and raged enough since the accident. It hadn’t changed anything and only made her feel more like a failure.

“Good morning, sweetie. I’m glad to see you up and here on time.”

Beth put a smile on her face before turning to face her mother as she breezed into the office. “Did I have a choice?”

Francie Montgomery patted her shoulder before taking a seat at the desk. “Of course you do. Where you work is up to you. What you do with your life from now on is in your hands. You could open up a dance studio here in Dover.”

No way. She was not going to be one of those failed dancers who goes home and opens up a dance school for every mother who thinks her child is the next movie star. “What I want is to dance again.”

Her mother exhaled a soft sigh. “Beth, sooner or later you’ll have to accept that your professional career is over. Longing for something you can’t have is pointless.”

“It’s not over. Once I’m fully recovered, I will dance again. Somewhere.”

Her mother came and stood in front of her. “I hope and pray that’s true. But your doctors and your physical therapist think differently. You have to face the facts, sweetheart. And the sooner, the better.”

It was an old argument and one of the reasons Beth had moved out of her mother’s house. Though well-intentioned and motivated by love, her mom’s advice had quickly grown old. Being back in the family home, where the presence of her late father lingered, had added to her distress. There was only so much heartache and sadness she could endure. With her sister, Tori, in California for an indefinite amount of time, Beth had moved in to her apartment above the real estate office to maintain her sanity.

With her mother occupying the desk, Beth moved to the front window and stared at the early morning activity along Main Street in the small town. Her mother was right. She had to face reality. But how did she begin to accept that? How did she face each day with no direction? What could possibly fill the dark, aching void left inside that ballet had always filled?

As she turned away, movement from the office across the entryway drew her attention.

Her mom had bought the entire building when she’d opened her real estate business decades ago. The ground floor consisted of two office spaces, one on either side of the entry, each with windows facing the street and each other. In the four days since she’d moved in to the apartment, she’d assumed the other office was vacant. But now a man was moving about inside. Curious, she stepped closer to the window.

He disappeared into the back room. When he reappeared, Beth strained for a closer look. Even with his back to her, it was impossible to miss how attractive he was. He had broad shoulders beneath a long-sleeved polo shirt of deep red that highlighted his muscular back as he bent and moved. Dark jeans hugged long legs. A warm trickle of appreciation oozed along her skin. Something about the dark hair curling along the nape of his neck bumped up her interest. She peered closer, hoping to catch a glimpse of his face.

“Beth, I need to show houses this morning. I don’t know when I’ll be back. Is there anything you need to know before I leave?”

She tore her gaze from the intriguing figure in the other office. “I don’t think so. Nothing much has changed since I worked here in high school.”

Her mother smiled. “True. Change comes slowly to Dover. But we’re getting better. I can’t wait for you to see the Christmas celebrations Gemma introduced last year.”

Beth had only come home for a few days last Christmas, and had left as soon as possible. She’d been eager to get back to prepare for the London tour, and looking at the extensive decorations and events her sister-in-law had orchestrated hadn’t been of interest to her.

With her mother gone, the office grew silent, allowing Beth too much time to dwell on the losses in her life. Thankfully the phone started ringing, and the next few hours passed quickly. The man next door hadn’t reappeared, but she’d been unable to get him out of her thoughts.

At noon, Beth hung the out-to-lunch sign on the door, set the lock and stepped out into the entryway. She looked forward to going upstairs and hiding in her room for a while. Maintaining a happy face for the walk-in customers and a cheery tone for the call-ins inquiring about homes for sale took a toll on her emotional reserves.

She inserted her key into the lock as the door to the other office opened, and she glanced over her shoulder. Finally she would get a glimpse of the intriguing man she’d seen this morning. The smile on her face faded when she looked at him. There was something familiar about the sky blue eyes and the angle of the chin.

“Hello, Beth.”

She inhaled sharply. “Noah? Noah Carlisle. Is that you?” She took a closer look. It was him, but he was different. Very different. This wasn’t the rail-thin, awkward, nerdy friend she remembered. The thick dark glasses were gone, exposing the rich blue eyes with lashes long enough to touch his brows. The planes of his face were still angled, but maturity had added a depth to his features and a sensuous fullness to his lips. Heat flooded her cheeks at the direction of her thoughts, along with a rush of delight. She reached out and gave him a hug, only to pull back when she realized he wasn’t returning the gesture. In fact, he wasn’t saying anything at all. There was no warmth in his blue eyes, no welcoming smile.

“I’m surprised you remember me.”

“Of course I remember you.” How could he say that? Her mind flooded with wonderful memories of their friendship. It had been the most important one in her life. She’d fallen in love with him, but he’d made it painfully clear he hadn’t returned her feelings. Her warm recollections drained away into a dark pool of humiliation. Suddenly self-conscious, she swallowed and brushed an errant strand of hair off her cheek, attempting to collect herself. “I was thinking about you the other day.”

A muscle in his jaw flexed rapidly. “Just the other day?”

What was he saying? “Yes. I mean, I’ve thought about you several times over the years.” His eyes were hard and cold, and there was no warmth in his tone. Noah had changed in more than looks.

A sardonic grin shifted his mouth. “That often in twelve years.”

Her conscience burned. She had thought about him, but she’d never bothered to do anything about it. Gathering her composure, she lifted her chin. “You look good.” Good didn’t come close. The scrawny young man she remembered had grown into a dangerously attractive man.

The bony shoulders had broadened into an impressive width above a muscular chest and biceps strained at the fabric of his shirt. His clear blue eyes were more vibrant above the high cheekbones. His thick, dark chocolate hair still persisted in falling over his forehead. But it was his air of confidence that was the most striking difference. The once shy, hesitant boy now carried himself with a confident masculinity that radiated from every pore.

“You’ve changed.”

“I grew up.” He held her gaze a long moment. “I heard you were back in town.”

The disinterested tone in his voice hurt. They’d been best friends. Why was he so distant and angry? True, she hadn’t stayed in touch. Her career had taken all her time and attention. Surely he understood that. She refocused on his comment. “I am. For the time being.”

Noah set his jaw. “Don’t you think you’ve chased this foolish dancing dream of yours long enough?”

She clamped her teeth together and fisted her hands to keep a lid on her anger. She didn’t know what his problem was, but she’d had enough. “Foolish? I’m a professional dancer with a world-renowned ballet company. I’d hardly call that a dream.”

“Are you dancing now?”

The truth pierced like a scalding poker to her heart. “No. But I will be. As soon as I heal and regain my strength.” Maybe if she said it often enough, it would be true.

He shook his head. “You haven’t changed a bit. Still obsessed with only one thing. Being a big-time ballerina. You don’t care about anything else.”

“That’s not true. I care about a lot of things.”

Noah arched his dark eyebrows, and one corner of his mouth hiked up. “I know what you don’t care about. Your family and your friends. How could they compete with your dreams of fame? Good seeing you again, Bethany. Have a nice life.”

He pivoted and strode out onto the sidewalk, disappearing before she could form a response. Noah had always been her biggest supporter, her cheerleader. What had she done that had turned him against her? If anyone had a right to feel angry, she did. He was the one who had rejected her affections with a shrug, leaving her burning with humiliation and pain, then put as much distance as possible between them.

Up in her cozy apartment, Beth munched on a tasteless sandwich, searching her memory for some explanation for Noah’s behavior. What was he doing back in Dover anyway, and why hadn’t her mother told her he was here and renting space from her?

A vague memory formed of her mother mentioning something about an old friend coming back to town, but she’d tuned it out like she did most things concerning Dover.

The ugly truth forced itself into her mind. Because keeping in touch wasn’t high on your list. Dancing had been her passion her whole life. She’d been aware that her drive had pushed most of her relationships to the side. Even her family. But to succeed, she’d had to pour all her effort and concentration into her work. And it had paid off. For the last six years, she’d been at the top of her game. Ambiance, the new ballet the troupe had performed in London, which she’d helped choreograph, had been the highlight of her career and put her name in the forefront of the dance world. Until one misstep had caused an injury that put her future in jeopardy. But she’d come back. She would. Somehow.

Was losing touch with Noah a big enough reason for his attitude? It didn’t make sense. All she knew was that she didn’t like him being angry with her. It had been a long torturous year, starting with her injury in London last winter, two surgeries and months of painful rehab in New York before coming home. She was worn down and desperately needed a friend. Noah had always been her confidant, and he’d known exactly what to say to lift her spirits.

Until today.

* * *

Noah strode away from his office and along the sidewalk, working his jaw and trying without much success to quell the anger and hurt raging in his gut. Bethany was back. He’d known that for a while. And he’d known he’d run into her sooner or later. Sooner, actually, since her mother was his landlord.

Checking Main Street for traffic, Noah jogged across to the courthouse park, making his way to Union Street and Latimer Office Supply. The chilly November wind stung, but he welcomed it. It took his mind off seeing Beth again. He had a new business to get up and running. Carlisle Structural Solutions was all he should be thinking about.

After paying for his supplies and picking up a sandwich at the DoOver Deli on the corner, Noah returned to his office and settled in the back room. The first bite of his sandwich triggered a memory—one he didn’t welcome. He’d ordered the deli’s special club sandwich—Beth’s favorite. He’d forgotten that. He shoved the meal aside.

He’d forgotten a lot of things about Beth. Like how lovely she was. When she’d turned and faced him, his mouth had gone dry. His palms had grown sweaty, and his heart rate tripled. He was eighteen again and in love with his best friend. The years had faded away, along with the pain of her desertion and her callous indifference toward those who cared about her. All he saw was her hazel eyes that always sparkled, her kissable mouth and the way she stirred his protective instincts when she was close. The pink sweater with the wide collar added a rosy tinge to her cheeks and made her look very touchable. Her dark hair was cut in a way that made it float around her face, and when a strand had landed on her cheek, he’d had to stop himself from brushing it aside.

Then she’d hugged him, and he’d slammed into a wall of searing emotions, unable to move. She’d been soft and warm against him. He hadn’t been prepared for that kind of response. He’d fought against the tender emotions, which had only brought out his long buried resentment. He’d spoken harshly, aware of the hurt he’d caused her from the look in her eyes, but unable to stop the stinging words.

Beth had severed their friendship with one quick cut and never looked back. That’s when Noah realized that as far as she was concerned, nothing and no one was as important to her as her life in the dance world.

Until today, he had believed he’d recovered from his broken heart and her disregard for their friendship. But like a punctured water line, all his emotions were spewing forth. In the meantime he’d have to shut off the emotional flood and keep his distance from Bethany until she left again. Easier said than done. He was always keenly attuned to her nearness, and he’d never been able to keep her from flitting through his brain like a butterfly, touching down lightly here and there, bringing memories to life again.

He glanced around the back room of his new office. He still had a lot to do to get his engineering business up and running. In the meantime he was working full-time for the city of Dover as a building inspector. Not his first choice of jobs, but it paid the bills. Thankfully, he’d be spending most of his time conducting on-site work, and there’d be no need to interact with Beth. Besides, she’d be gone soon enough, back to the only thing that ever mattered to her. Dancing. Then life would go on as usual. And he could forget Beth. Again.

Tossing his trash in the bin in the small kitchen area, Noah locked up and headed out. He had four inspections to do this afternoon. He fought the urge to glance into the real estate office to see if Beth was there, scolding himself for his weakness. He would not look. Stepping onto the sidewalk, he went straight to his car and climbed in, shutting down all thoughts of his old friend, fully aware of the uncomfortable truth he’d denied for years.

Bethany Montgomery had taken root in his heart, and there was no yanking her out.

* * *

Beth rubbed her eyes, trying to focus on the listings on the computer screen. After a restless night she’d wanted nothing more than to sleep in, hide under the covers and try to forget her life was in shambles. Her sister’s apartment was perfect for isolating herself. Tori had a good eye for decorating, and she’d designed the space in soft muted tones of green and blue that wrapped around you like a warm hug. The balcony, which overlooked the courthouse square across the street, was shielded from curious eyes by large pots of evergreen vines that even in the dead of winter provided privacy.

But today her new job required her to be in the office bright and early. Her mother had a long list of showings, which meant Beth would be working alone most of the day. Not a pleasant prospect because it allowed her too much time to think.

She’d fretted over Noah’s icy reception all night, but still found only one logical explanation. He hadn’t forgiven her for not staying in touch. Noah didn’t have a mean bone in his body, but he’d behaved like a man with a giant chip on his shoulder. A man who had been deeply hurt. But not by her. He’d never loved her. The realization still had the power to bring a sharp prick to her heart. She planned on talking to him again once he calmed down. If he did. She had enough to worry about as it was.

Shutting down thoughts of her old friend, she concentrated on sorting through the new additions on the Multiple Listing Service and the few phone messages left by locals who were putting their homes on the market. Thankfully the day passed quickly. It was early afternoon when the office door swooshed open. She looked up, expecting house hunters. Instead, a young girl walked in and slowly made her way toward the reception desk, her gaze scanning the walls as she went.

She was a cute child with golden brown hair in a page-boy style that framed her oval face and brought out her big blue eyes. Beth guessed her to be about the same age as her niece, Abby. She leaned her forearms on the desk. “Are you looking to buy a home, or are you more interested in renting?”

The little girl giggled. “I’m not looking for a house. I’m only nine. I’m here to look at the pictures.” She pointed to the wall of family portraits and photographs her mother proudly displayed.

“I see. Shouldn’t you be in school?”

“Dentist appointment.” The girl stepped to the desk and extended her hand. “I’m Chloe. I come in here a lot to look at the pictures when Miss Francie is here. Oh.” Her eyes grew wide, and her mouth fell open. “You’re her. I mean you’re you, I mean—” She swallowed and pointed to the ballet portrait. “That’s you, isn’t it?”

Beth smiled and nodded. “Yes, it is.”

Chloe’s eyes grew soft and dreamy, and she clasped her hands together over her heart. “You’re beautiful. Like a white butterfly floating in the air.”

Her throat contracted. Never had she received such a sweet and sincere compliment. “Thank you, Chloe. That means a lot to me.”

“I want to be a ballerina. I want to drift like a feather and wear beautiful costumes.” She spread her arms and twirled around the office.

Beth couldn’t help but smile. The child was adorable. “Well, you can if you work hard. It takes a lot of training and dedication. Do you take dance lessons now?”

Chloe stopped. Her arms dropped to her sides, and her expression sagged nearly to the floor. “No. I can’t.”

She spoke the words with such drama that Beth had to swallow the chuckle that rose in her throat. “Why not?”

Chloe plopped her elbows on the desk, resting her chin in her hands. “Because my dad thinks it’s a waste of time, and he doesn’t want me to get caught up in silly dreams.”

Beth frowned and pressed her lips together. What kind of parent would tell a child such a ridiculous thing? “Dancing isn’t silly or a waste of time. It is a beautiful way to express emotion. It builds muscle and teaches discipline.”

“Daddy thinks it’s better if I play sports. He says they build character and teach a whole bunch of life lessons and stuff.”

Typical male. She could hear her brothers making the same argument. “What does your mother say?”

“Oh, she’s not here. She and Daddy got divorced a long time ago. She lives in Hollywood and has her own TV show. It’s called Brunch with Yvonne St. James.” Chloe’s eyes brightened, and she came around to stand beside Beth. “She’s going to send me a plane ticket so I can spend Thanksgiving with her, and she’s going to put me on her show, and I’ll get to meet lots of famous people. I hope I can meet Dustin Baker. I love his music, and he’s so dreamy.”

Beth had no idea who that was, but obviously he made Chloe’s little heart beat faster. “Are you going alone to see your mom?”

“Yes, ma’am. I can’t wait.”

Beth hadn’t been addressed as ma’am in a long time, and hearing it now set her back. It was common, even expected, here in the South, but having it directed at her made her feel older than her thirty years.

“I’ve seen lots of pictures of you.”

“You have?”

Chloe nodded. “Your mama talks about you a lot.” She pointed to the picture wall again. “I know your whole family. Those are your big brothers, Linc and Gil, and that’s their new wives, Gemma and Julie. Oh, and that’s Evan and Abby.” She walked toward the wall. “That’s Seth and Tori, but they aren’t here now ’cause Seth is in school to be a policeman and Tori is in California. I wonder if she knows my mom?”

“California is a pretty big place.”

Chloe shrugged. “I wish I had a big family. It’s just me and my dad. Oh, and my gram.”

“I’ve noticed you’re limping. Did you hurt yourself?”

She glanced down at her knee and shrugged. “I have Alls Goods Ladder.”

“She means Osgood-Schlatter.”

Beth’s pulse throbbed at the sound of Noah’s rich voice. She hadn’t heard him come in, nor had she expected to see him again so soon. He barely gave her a glance now.

“Chloe, what are you doing here? I told you to stay in my office.”

“Hi, Daddy. I wanted to see the pictures, and I got to meet the ballerina. I mean Miss Beth. Isn’t she beautiful?”

An awkward silence fell over the room like a suffocating blanket. Beth kept her gaze averted as Noah placed his hands on his daughter’s shoulders in a protective gesture. Noah was a father? She hadn’t considered that. She’d heard he’d gotten married not long after he’d moved to California, which had added another spear to her punctured heart. Noah had never thought of her as anything other than a friend. His buddy.

She swallowed and grasped for control. “Osgood’s. That’s a knee problem, isn’t it?”

He nodded. “She injured her knee playing soccer and then had a growth spurt, which complicated things.” He squeezed Chloe’s shoulder. “She’s supposed to do her physical therapy exercises every day, but it’s like pulling teeth.”

“I hate them. They hurt and they’re boring.”

Beth could sympathize. “I know exactly how you feel. I had surgery on my knee, and I have to do PT exercises every day, too. It’s not fun, but if you’re going to get stronger and play soccer, you have to do them faithfully.”

Chloe screwed up her mouth and crossed her arms over her chest. “Great. I was hoping you’d be on my side.”

Beth chuckled softly. “The exercises don’t have to be boring. You can listen to music—that usually helps.”

“Is that what you do?”

She nodded. “I put on my favorite ballet warm-up music and pretend I’m dancing. You know dancing can help strengthen the other muscles in your legs and knees and speed your recovery.”

“Really? Dad, can Miss Beth teach me to dance? I’ll do my exercises if I can dance. Please?”

The deep scowl on Noah’s face made it clear he was unhappy with her suggestion. “Chloe, go on back to my office and collect your things. We’re going home.”

“Okay. ’Bye Miss Beth.”

The minute Chloe was gone, Noah approached her, his eyes narrowed and dark. “I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t encourage her to come over here.”

“Why? Apparently she visits my mother frequently.”

“That’s different. Your mother will always be here. You won’t. You said yourself you’ll be leaving as soon as you’re fully recovered.”

She had told him that even though she knew it wasn’t true. “And what does that have to do with Chloe visiting me?”

“I don’t want you filling her head full of ideas about your dancing career.”

Now she understood, sort of. “Is that why you don’t want her to take dancing lessons? Because of me?”

“Don’t flatter yourself. I want her to grow up with a practical, realistic view of the world, and I don’t want her sidetracked by pointless dreams of being a dancer or an actress or any of those careers that lead to disappointment.”

“Little girls need to dream, Noah. You had a few dreams, as I recall.”

He nodded in acknowledgment, but his gaze still held condemnation. “But I grew up and realized that dreams don’t come true.”

“You’re wrong. Dreams are what gives us hope and joy.”

“Hope and joy?” He shook his head. “Disappointment and heartbreak. Look where your dream has left you. I want better for Chloe.”

The hurt in his light blue eyes and the pain that pulled at the corner of his mouth stabbed like an ice pick to her heart. What had happened to turn the sweet, understanding boy she’d loved into an angry, closed-off man?

He held up his hands as if to ward off further discussion. “Just stop telling her dancing can help with her recovery.”

“It can. In fact, ballet is being used as therapy for people with Parkinson’s and a variety of other medical conditions. At the very least, it’ll encourage her to do her exercises. I’ve been through countless physical therapy sessions over the years, and the only way to get through much of it is to make it fun. What harm can it do?”

“Harm? Next she’ll want to be a dancer like you, and look where that leads.”

“Where does it lead, Noah? I had a wonderful career. I achieved everything I set out to accomplish. I fulfilled my dream.”

“But what did it cost you along the way? What did you give up to capture that dream, Beth? Was it really worth it?” He yanked open the door and left.

Beth clenched her teeth. She wanted to shout at him that yes, it had been worth it, but the words wouldn’t come. Why? She’d always been so sure of her direction, her purpose. She’d been blessed with a gift, and she’d used it to the fullest. Until the injury had derailed her future. But she’d make a comeback. She was still working out in her old studio at her mom’s house each morning. That’s what she wanted, wasn’t it? To dance even if it wasn’t as the lead?

A small voice whispered in her ear. Is that what she wanted? Or was it what she was doing because there was nothing else? The last two years had taken a toll not only on her body, but also on her passion. She was still trying to sort out the shifts in her emotions from the accident. Now she was trying to swim through gelatin and figure out who she was and where she wanted to go.

Beth watched Noah walk away. Twelve years ago she’d handed him her heart, the bravest thing she’d ever done, and he’d tossed it aside. He’d gone on with his life, gotten married and had a child. He hadn’t bothered to contact her, so why was she the bad guy?

She looked across the entryway to Noah’s office as he and Chloe walked out. Chloe waved over her shoulder, a mischievous smile on her face. Dad may have laid down the law, but she had a feeling Chloe would find a way to come and visit her again. And she would make sure to invite her, despite what Noah had said.