Читать книгу ‘… then he ate my boy entrancers.’ - Louise Rennison - Страница 87

Jas has read her poem to everyone, so I hope she’s got it out of her system now. It is truly crap. That is a fact. But I didn’t say so; I wanted Jas to perk up for our big adventure. I was soooo excited, and I was standing up swinging on a swing, singing “I want to be in America! Everything’s free in America!!!”

Then Ellen said, “Georgia, have you actually snogged Masimo yet?”

I laughed in a sultry way. “Have I snogged Masimo? Have I—”

Jas said, “No, she hasn’t. Well, not unless you count two seconds, which I don’t, and anyway it’s not on the snogging scale, so it’s not…on the…snogging scale.”

Oh, thanks, bestest pally NOT. I wish I had told her what I thought about Fish Boy’s poem now.

Jools said, “Do you think Wet Lindsay has snogged him? You know, when they went to Late and Live. She must have, you know…wanted to.”

Ohhhnooo. Get out of my head.

I said, “Who in their right mind would snog Wet Lindsay?”

Jools said, “Well, actually, Robbie must have snogged her because they went out together and—”

I started humming in my head so I didn’t have to listen to this; it was making me feel quite sick.

Jas said, “Perhaps some kinds of boys like tiny foreheads. Tom said that he knows a boy who’s mad for girls who wear really thick glasses.”

Good grief. Still, at least, there was a chance for Nauseating P. Green.

Ellen was obviously in her own dream world. “That mate of Tom’s – Speedy – asked me out when I was down the square, but…oh…I don’t know, it’s just there is something. I mean, he’s nice but I still…you know…have feelings for…well, you know…Do you think?”

I said, “Can I ask you something, Ellen? What are you raving on about?”

I wished I hadn’t asked.

“I mean Dave the Laugh. Is he going out with Rachel still…or…er…what?”

Jas said, “He wasn’t with her when we saw him the other day, was he, Gee? Did he mention her when you went for a coffee?”

Oh shutupshutup about Dave the sodding Laugh.

Ellen was just about to start the “I didn’t know that you saw Dave the Laugh, what did you talk about, did he mention me, how come you went for a coffee with him?” scenario when Mabs saved my bacon (ish).

She said, “How do you know that Masimo wants to see you?”

“Well, he asked me for my telephone number and I couldn’t give it to him because my head was about to drop off from redness. So he said, “OK, Miss Hard to Get, I will see you later, when I get back from America.”

Ellen was looking at me. “So he said ‘See you later’ then?”

I said, “No, not just ‘see you later’ like in ‘s’later’ but more—”

But Ellen was locked into her own ramblosity. “Dave the Laugh said ‘see you later’ to me and I did the flicky hair and everything and dancing by myself and so on…and then he went off with Rachel.”

The gang started nodding wisely (not).

I said, “Yes, but Masimo said ‘see you later’ after I had become Mystery Woman.”

Rosie said, “Mystery Woman?”

“Yes, after I had accidentally treated him to my glaciosity.”

Rosie had her face really close to mine.

“You are Mystery Woman?”

All the gang looked at me.

Jools said, “You are MYSTERY Woman?”

Then Mabs said, “YOU are Mystery Woman?”

What is this, a parrots’ convention?

Rosie said, “Mystery Woman. You are Mystery Woman. Not as you used to be – ‘Oooooooh my boy entrancers have stuck together’ Woman?”