Читать книгу ‘Dancing in my nuddy-pants!’ - Louise Rennison - Страница 44

Lunchtime

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Very nippy noodles shivering around outside. What harm have we ever done to anyone?

I said that to the gang, “What harm have we ever done to anyone that we are made to go outside in Antarctic conditions?”

Rosie, Ellen, Jools and Mabs all said, “None, we have never done anything.”

But Jas, who seems to have turned into Wise Woman of the Forest, said, “Well, there was the locust thing, and the dropping of the blodge lab skeleton on to Mr Attwood’s head and…”

Honestly, if I wasn’t the girlfriend of a Sex God I would have had to duff Jas up, she is so ludicrously “thoughtful” these days. I think I liked her better when she was all depressed and didn’t have a boyfriend. Regular snogging has brought out the worst in her.

The Bummers came by all tarted up. Jackie wears even more make-up than those scary circus people. You know when you go to the circus and you accidentally see a trapeze artist close up and they are orange.

Alison Bummer, unusually spot free, just the one gigantic boil on her neck, shouted over to us as they headed for the back fields and town, “Bye, bye, little girls, have a nice time doing your lessons.”

I said, “Honestly, I don’t know how they get away with it. They turn up for register, hang around torturing P. Green for a bit, have fifty fags in the loos and then bog off to town at lunchtime, to see their lardy boyfriends.”

We had a tutting outbreak as we shared our last snacks.

Rosie was shivering. “It is vair vair nippy noodles. I think I have got frostbite of the bum-oley.”

Eventually, in between Nazi patrols led by Wet Lindsay (who may be head girl, but is still: a) wet and b) boyfriendless), we managed to sneak into the science block.

‘Dancing in my nuddy-pants!’

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