Читать книгу Hot-Shot Doc, Secret Dad - Lynne Marshall - Страница 10

JULIE WAITED TO FACE the guy who’d knocked her up thirteen years ago.

“Ms. Sterling?” The young and attractive medical clinic receptionist called her name as if it were a crowded waiting room.

Julie was the only one sitting there, being that it was almost lunchtime. “Yes?”

“Dr. Montgomery will be with you as soon as he finishes with his last patient. He apologizes for running late. The appointment turned out to be a little more involved than expected.”

“Thanks for letting me know.” Julie’s nerves were twisted to the point of breaking anyway over the thought of facing the man who’d once changed the entire course of her life. Now she’d get to balance on this tightrope over the roiling anxiety a while longer. Oh, joy.

Her goal was to not let on how desperate she was for the job. But how would she control these butterflies over facing him again after all these years? Short answer, she had to. She’d do whatever was necessary to get this job. Anything for her son.

What was that old saying about how you could never go home again? Well, Cattleman Bluff, Wyoming, population twenty thousand, was the last place in the world Julie had expected to wind up. Her parents had bought her a ticket on a one-way train out of town when she’d barely been eighteen.

Now here she was applying for a job with a man she never, ever wanted to see again for a dozen different reasons that all boiled down to one in particular. But as a single mother, she’d do whatever it took to make a better life for her son, James. Twelve years old, with thirteen breathing down his neck come May, all hormones and bad choices, and already getting into trouble back in Los Angeles. James needed strong men in his life to set him straight, and the military school in Laramie seemed the best place for now.

Guilt stabbed at her conscience as it had for years. She’d made a rash decision at a tender age and had stuck to her guns no matter how hard it had been. Problem was, with James going wild, and now with the death of her parents, her bull-headed strength had run out. It was crunch time. After thirteen years of running, fighting and insisting she could manage on her own, she’d finally realized she needed backup. From a man.

The school was willing to take James midsemester. Of course, with his being there, that meant she’d be living and working over a hundred miles away from her son, but that was another sacrifice she’d have to make.

The school cost a lot, and the small monetary windfall from her parents helped tremendously toward that. All she had to do was cover their personal living expenses. Thankfully, she had a solid profession to rely on … if she got this job, that was.

If she didn’t, she’d try for something closer to the school, but her parents had left her their home in the will, and these days only a fool would turn down free housing, even if it required moving to a new state.

Julie fought off another ripple of guilt and regret for the messy relationship they’d had—how her careless actions had been at the heart of it, but, even before, her parents’ expectations for her future had been overbearing—and the fact they’d never mended it before their horrible accident at Christmas. Deciding to get out of the extralong winter, her parents had set out driving to Florida and had hit a patch of black ice a mere twenty miles from home. A swell of emotion built deep in her chest and pushed against her throat. She swallowed hard around it. All the years they’d lost because of the stubborn Sterling spirit, which worked both ways, theirs and hers. James had never really gotten to know his grandparents either … Now her eyes were welling up. She couldn’t let this happen here. Especially not now. She had to stay strong.

Julie glanced at her watch and blinked the blur away. It was twenty minutes past her appointment time. She’d cut the doctor some slack, and use the gift of time to pull herself together.

Being a nurse practitioner, she understood how one appointment could turn into something much more than routine—a patient might come in for a diabetes check and their blood pressure would be out of control, or they’d happen to mention that they’d been having dizzy spells on their way out the door, or that the cut on their foot they’d neglected to mention before that moment had red streaks running up the leg. While working for LA County medical clinics, she’d learned anything was possible when dealing with health and patients.

Or, it could be that she was the last person on earth Trevor Montgomery wanted to see …

Julie took a deep breath to steady her crawling-out-of-control jitters. Focusing away from the reality of facing her fears and the downright sadness of losing her parents, and on to the task at hand. Getting the job. No matter what. And that ushered in a second wave of riotous anticipation. Of all the people in the world to need a job from.

She shook her head. Would Trevor even remember her after thirteen years?

To distract herself, she glanced around. The cozy waiting room was typical of many she’d been in, with the exception of having a cowboy rustic charm. Several oil paintings of cattle drives filled the walls. What else could she expect from Cattleman Bluff? The couches and chairs were in earthy tones, browns and beige with pops of orange, and made with natural wood, sanded and varnished, smoothed to perfection for armrests. The choice of magazines was decidedly Wyoming slanted, too. Out West Today. Wyoming Home. Western Living. Not to mention the huge cowboy boot–shaped umbrella holder beside the front door.

It had to be thirty degrees outside in mid-February. Back home in California, it seemed to be an endless spring, no matter what month. Fortunately her mother had left behind her warm winter coat and rubber-soled, faux fur–lined boots. Though a size too big, they’d do for today, and wearing them helped Julie remember her mother’s softer, warmer side, the one she’d rarely showed as Julie had gotten older. Snapping away from where those thoughts might lead, she pondered how quickly a person could get used to the mild weather out on the West Coast. Had she turned into a weather wuss?

“Ms. Sterling, Doctor will see you now.” The perky and blonde twenty-something receptionist held the door open. Julie’s heart pounded as if she’d be meeting the president of the United States and would have to deliver his speech to the nation at the last minute, or something.

Get a hold of yourself. Trevor’s just a human being, not God. Though he does seem to hold your future in his hands today.

What was that old trick to help settle nerves—picture them naked? It didn’t take long for her memory to click in with a bigger-than-life naked-jock image.

Oh, no, not a good idea. Now she could add flushed cheeks to the ever-growing list of mounting terrors. The spiteful image flashed again as she fumbled to pick up her purse. Funny how some moments stuck in the mind as if they’d happened yesterday.

“This way.” Blonde Rita, the receptionist, walked with a distinct sway down a short hall. Out of the blue, Julie wondered if Trevor was now married with children.

They passed four patient-exam rooms toward a modest office at the end, gulp, where Trevor Montgomery, the once-gifted high school athlete, exceptional student, all-around dreamy guy—not to mention the man who’d taken her virginity—waited.

Julie did one last futile battle with the panic jetting along her nerve endings, then threw in a quick prayer to help her get through the interview.

Trevor stood behind a huge rustic weathered wood ranch-style desk, smiling and reaching for her hand when she finally had the guts to look up. Tall, as she’d remembered, dark hair, piercing brown, almost black, eyes thanks to distant Native American heritage on his mother’s side. Handsome as ever. She stopped in her tracks and took him all in.

She couldn’t very well stand there gawking, so she tore away her gaze, and glanced around the office. Matching woven iron lamps with stretched cowhide shades said classic cowboy chic through and through.

The steer antlers that were thankfully missing in the waiting room were mounted on the wall behind his desk, like a crown, exactly where he stood. No white coat for him. No, he wore a blue pinstriped, long-sleeved, button-down, Western-style shirt, open at the neck, no tie. No wedding ring either. The black Wrangler jeans with a tasteful, not overly large, silver-and-bronze intricately patterned belt buckle were de rigueur for these parts, and she assumed he wore boots, but couldn’t be sure since he stood behind the behemoth desk. But obviously he did, right?

“Julie? It’s great to see you again.” Those eyes seemed to look into her soul. Thirteen years had transformed the good-looking young jock into a mature and handsome thirty-four-year-old man, by her count, complete with winter tan and creases fanning out from his eyes—the mark of a guy who still worked outdoors on his family’s Circle M Ranch.

“Nice to see you, too,” she mumbled and lied, forced a step forward and jutted out her hand, performing some kind of royalty handshake, one she’d normally never do. But since his mere touch had set off sparklers all the way down to her fingertips, she didn’t want to hold his hand unnecessarily—even if it made her seem prudish. It was just all so awkward, wasn’t it?

No ring. No picture of a family on his desk that she could see either. Didn’t mean he wasn’t involved, though, did it?

He didn’t belabor the wimpy handshake. “I had no idea you were a nurse practitioner, with great credentials, too.” His relaxed cadence reminded her how much she’d forgotten about home since living in LA for thirteen years. Things slowed down here, not that mad rush called daily life out West.

She nodded, not anywhere ready to find her voice.

“So what are you doing back in Cattleman Bluff?” He gestured for her to sit. She obeyed but perched on the edge of the chair rather than getting comfortable—no way that would happen anyway.

She cleared her throat, goading herself to woman up. “The truth?”

He nodded, a hint of intrigue darkening those already deep brown irises.

“My parents died in a car accident.”

“I’d heard. What a tragedy. I’m so sorry,” he said with a perfect mix of empathy and sincerity. Good job, Doc.

She gave a quick nod, unwilling to get sidetracked. Not now—she had to stay focused. Win the job! “Yes, well. They left me the house, and it turns out there was a place for my son at the military academy in Laramie for the rest of this semester. He’s in orientation now.”

“I’ve heard good things about that school.” Though the one quirked brow proved he knew the school was a haven for troubled boys, and Cattleman Bluff had a perfectly good middle school just around the corner.

Her jaw clamped tight. His brow remained quirked. They stared at each other.

“Ah.” She was grateful he trudged ahead rather than allow an awkward silence—probably just to be polite. “You know my brother keeps an apartment in Laramie. He prefers it there over Cheyenne.” They’d hit their first rocky patch. Trevor—or Dr. Montgomery as he deserved to be called for today’s purposes—segued smoothly as that driven snow outside the window into easy banter. “When he isn’t gallivanting around the country lecturing and training other cardiologists, that is.”

Julie raised her brows in acknowledgement, but didn’t add a comment, not wanting to open the door for a deeper discussion on why her son was going to military school.

She’d heard of the great Cole Montgomery, practicing cutting-edge mitral valve replacements in the same fashion as cardiac catheterization, at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore. The guy who’d been the pride of Cattleman Bluff and the one person Trevor couldn’t seem to outshine. The thought made Julie wonder why Trevor had settled here, practicing family medicine, instead of pursuing a more lucrative medical specialty like his big brother.

“So,” Trevor continued on, since Julie was proving to be less than chatty. “You’re certainly the best-qualified candidate for this job. I need someone who can pull their weight and work independently. The fact that you’re also a licensed midwife is a big plus. Hell, you’re probably better at delivering babies than I am.” He flashed his trademark charming smile—nice lips, white teeth. Yeah, she remembered that smile.

“I’ve delivered a hundred or so babies over the last five years. Handled my share of difficult births.”

“That’s great, Julie. We’ll need those skills, too.” He laced his fingers and rested his elbows on the desk. “You’re probably wondering why I’m hiring.”

“Business is booming?”

He gave an obligatory smile. “Not quite. The reason is my father has had some health issues lately, and I need to be more help on the ranch. Some days, if you get the job, you’ll be running the clinic all by yourself. Would you be okay with that?”

“I would.” And she meant it. She’d been expected to pull her load in the last two clinics where she’d worked in Los Angeles, even when she’d protested that they were treating her as if she were a doctor, but not paying her the same wages. Fact was, she knew how to handle hard work.

“Some days it’s deader than the prairie around here, then all of a sudden everyone gets sick. You just never know. And with winter almost over, people come out in droves. But I need to know my patients are in good hands when I’m doing my ranch chores.”

“If you hire me, I’ll give this job one hundred percent effort. I promise.”

“You need the job?”

This was no time to play coy. Of course I do! “I do. That military school is pricey, and, last I looked, you’re the only game in town.”

“Fair enough.” He sat straighter, reached for a pad of paper and a pen. “Then I need to do an extensive interview to gauge your medical experience, if you don’t mind.”

Great, now they’d play twenty questions—medical tricks, and treatment of the day—and she’d better come through. At least her jitters had settled down, thinking about medicine. “Fire away, Dr. Montgomery.”

Twenty minutes later, after the most thorough and difficult medical interview in her life, Julie realized her palms were clammy. What if, after all of this, she didn’t get the job? What would she do now that James was already enrolled at the military academy?

“If I hire you, I won’t throw you in the fire. I promise to give you a couple of weeks’ orientation, where you can shadow me and my patients, and learn the system. Or as long as you need. I’m proud to say I’m the only doctor outside of Cheyenne that uses computerized charting. It takes a bit of getting used to, but in the long run—”

“I’m familiar with that, depending on the system you’re using.” County Hospital had been late to implement the charting system, and the one they’d used had been clunky, but she’d figured it out well enough.

“Great. So do you have any questions for me?”

Are you married? Do you have children? “Is there a benefits package, and how soon will it kick in—that is, if you hire me.” How desperate could she sound?

“As soon as the paperwork is processed, and you’ve completed your orientation, you’ll be covered.” Trevor pressed the intercom then pushed back from his desk.

“Yes, Doctor?” Rita’s chirpy voice was loud and clear and maybe a little too fawning.

“Could you bring in the new-employee paperwork?”

Julie inhaled, realizing she’d held her breath since her last question. “I’ve got the job?”

“It’s yours if you want it.” Trevor offered a far more genuine smile this time.

“Thank you.” Now Julie smiled, too, anxiety streaming out of her body.

Rita arrived with a packet of paperwork, and handed it to Julie, assessing her more closely as she did.

“You probably want to have your lunch before your afternoon patients, maybe call your wife, so I can fill this out in the waiting room, if you’d prefer.”

“No need. The clinic is closed on Tuesday afternoons. Otherwise, I’d introduce you to Charlotte, my nurse. I’ve got to finish up on Mr. Waverly’s chart anyway. Feel free to stay right there.” He went back to work but said as an aside, “Oh, and there isn’t a Mrs. Montgomery. Just my old man, and, to be honest, having dinner with him every night is enough.” He gave that charming smile over his laptop, slyly forgiving her for her none-too-subtle probing into his personal life. She pretended to be completely focused on the paperwork.

Though he did seem easy and open about still being a bachelor. She wondered if it had to do with being stuck in this small town taking care of his father while his brother lived the good life traveling and keeping two homes.

For the next several minutes, Julie filled in all the blanks about her personal information, but sneaked surreptitious glances at Trevor as she did. His mahogany-colored hair was still thick and wavy, covering the tips of his ears. After all this time, she remembered how she’d run her fingers through it the one night they’d been together, probably because she’d dreamed about touching that hair all that summer long. His square jaw was set while he typed away at his keyboard. He knit his brows and seemed very concerned about whatever it was he entered about poor Mr. Waverly’s condition.

Once, he glanced up at the exact moment Julie did and their eyes met then skipped away from each other quicker than water on a hot griddle. Even so, the visual contact slid through her center, further jangling her nerves.

The man deserved to know.

But she needed the job. No way would she tell him! Not now anyway. Oh, man, why had she even considered coming home?

Round and round her thoughts chased each other. She was at the end of her rope and James needed … well, a father.

With her mouth dry and her hands clammier than ever, she finished her employment paperwork and handed the packet to Trevor. His lips torqued in a rigid manner as he took them, as if they were something sacred, then he used the intercom and asked Rita to process everything before she left for the day.

“Want to start tomorrow?” he asked, without looking at one iota of Julie’s personal information, while handing everything over to Rita—who must have been standing right outside in order to get there so fast.

“The sooner the better,” Julie said, relieved she’d have a new job before her final paycheck from her prior job was due.

He smiled tensely, and once Rita had left with the paperwork, Trevor shot Julie an anxious glance. Was he changing his mind? He followed Rita to the door, closing it behind her, further raising Julie’s curiosity. What did he have up his sleeve?

“Listen,” he said, stretching his lower lip and biting on it, as if the words were stuck just behind his teeth. Instead of walking back around his desk, he sat next to her. She’d been right about his wearing boots—black gator belly-patterned boots, to be exact. She stared at them rather than look at Trevor. “I’d like to ask you to forgive me.”

What? She was unable to hide her reaction; her chin pulled in, brows shot up and she was quite sure her eyes bugged out—at least that was how it felt. She had a dreaded hunch about what he referred to, and for the record he did look contrite, yet she still couldn’t quite make her brain believe it. “Seriously?” Did she say that out loud?

He made the wise decision of not attempting to touch her or even get too close. Though he leaned in and sincerity flowed from his gaze. “Completely. I messed up that night. There was nothing honorable about what I did. I took advantage of—”

“Wait a second, I may have been tipsy—well, we both were—but I still knew what I was doing. I had a choice in the matter. Made a bad one, but nevertheless.”

Now he was the one studying his boots. “That’s not the way it should be, the first time, you know?” He looked back up and nailed her. “A lady deserves some romance and wooing that first time. And I never even had the decency to apologize.”

Oh, my gosh, he was going all chivalrous on her. Too late, buddy. She’d waited and waited for his call, which had never come. He’d had his chance to be honorable, but had never bothered. Even so, she decided to take the practical route.

“Now that I’m thirty-one, I can say with certainty that life isn’t always the way it should be. That’s just how it is sometimes.” Without thinking, she reached for his forearm and squeezed. “We were both slightly inebriated, as I recall, and I’ll let you in on a little secret—I went to that party hoping to see you. I couldn’t believe it when you were interested in me, too. So—”

How naive could she have been? Any male would be interested in a willing woman at that age. Yeah, she’d learned that lesson the hard way.

“That still doesn’t make it right,” he said. “It’s not like losing your virginity can happen more than once.”

True, but how often did a girl get bells and whistles and romance with her first time? At least that had seemed to be the consensus among her friends back then, and, crazy as it sounded, it had helped ease her broken heart.

“It’s weighed on my mind and I just wanted to set things straight since you’re going to be working for me.” He glanced down at her hand, still grasping his forearm, and her ringless finger. “I messed up that night, didn’t have a clue you weren’t like the girls at college. I took advantage of you, plain and simple. Please forgive me.”

The remorseful expression, coupled with those dark, pleading eyes, painted a gentlemanly and heartfelt apology. It warmed Julie’s cynical heart by a few degrees, and brought out the forgiver in her. She let up on the tight clutch on his arm.

Truth was she’d packed away that chapter of her life years ago. What were the odds of getting knocked up your first time? Lucky her, right? Once the thrill of being with the guy of her dreams had worn off, he’d never called again, and the couple of missed periods had finally clicked in—better late than never, right? Julie had forgotten about that party and Trevor, who had already been long gone—she didn’t forget about him that quickly—and she’d faced the tough reality that she’d soon be a single mother at the ripe old age of eighteen.

But today was about a job, not about losing her virginity and getting pregnant. “Apology accepted.”

To be honest, many things weighed on her mind, too, about that night and the aftermath.

She’d already been enrolled at the University of Denver, and had settled into her dorm, gone through orientation, started her classes. After a couple of months and her normally irregular periods had just upped and quit, she hadn’t been able to deny her suspicions any longer and had taken a home test. Even though they’d used a condom, she’d gotten pregnant.

Julie had called her mother. The woman who’d had big plans for her education. Julie had been the model student her entire life—actually had had no choice, with her mother being a grade-school teacher and her father the principal of Cattleman Bluff High School.

Her mother’s voice had dropped at the truth. She’d flipped out, told Julie to have an abortion, so focused on her future, forgetting about Julie’s feelings and thoughts on the matter. “Your life will be over because of that baby.” She’d spit out the word baby, making Julie wonder if she’d ruined her own mother’s life.

“They’ll think you’re only after their money, those Montgomerys,” her father had said spitefully when he’d gotten on the phone. “They’ll publically humiliate you, and us.”

She’d shamed her parents and that had seemed to be all that mattered. Amazingly, with them, she and her baby had been left out of the mix.

Logically, because she’d been trained to think that way, Julie had transferred those implanted thoughts and doubts onto Trevor, the guy just beginning med school. With every ounce of guilt she’d felt heaped on her by her parents—as Julie’s mother had gotten her father involved in the call, with both pressuring her into ending the pregnancy—Julie had bundled up her feelings and kept her mouth shut.

Trevor hadn’t ever called her again. He hadn’t given a damn about her. It had hurt like hell and she’d been alone in a new city, with no friends and parents telling her to get rid of it. As if a baby could be called an “it”.

Hurt, anger and a large dose of immaturity had rounded out her decision. The good part was, against her parents’ advice, she’d kept her baby.

The tricky part was, she’d chosen never to tell Trevor about her being pregnant because she hadn’t wanted to be told to give up her baby by anyone else. She wouldn’t have regardless, no matter how much her parents had pressured her. But they’d gotten through to her on the rest—she hadn’t wanted to interfere with Trevor’s dream of becoming a doctor by telling him he was going to be a daddy. He’d already proved he didn’t care about her, hadn’t once tried to get in touch with her since they’d been together that night. She’d feared he’d deny he’d been with her, put all the blame on her, as her parents had. It would have ruined her one perfect night with the guy she’d dreamed about all summer.

Julie glanced at the man sitting next to her, smiling benevolently, and tried her best not to betray her thoughts.

Would he have accused her of only being after his family’s money, as her father had suggested? Being so young, she’d believed her parent’s predictions. And she’d been hurt, so hurt when she’d been forced to realize she didn’t mean anything to Trevor.

She’d been too young, immature, emotionally wounded and way too mixed up to work out all the particulars. How could she be expected to act rationally? But she’d stub-bornly chosen to keep Trevor in the dark. She’d show him. At least that was how it had started out. Then the reality of being a single mom and supporting herself had kicked in, and she’d been bound and determined to prove her parents wrong. She could do it all. She would do it all. Trevor had practically been forgotten by then. Now all these years later, she’d have to face her decision and somehow justify it.

Here she was accepting an apology from a man who’d taken her virginity but didn’t have any idea he was a father. That huge, and quite possibly unforgivable, reality twisted and tied into a knot the entire size of her stomach, making it hard to breathe.

“So you have my word that I’ll only behave respectfully and professionally toward you from here on out.” Could the guy sound any stiffer? Could she feel any worse?

Remember to breathe. “I appreciate that.” She figured she’d better ensure one thing before moving forward with what she suddenly needed—had no choice, in her mind—to do. “And I definitely have the job, right? And not just because of that?”

He gave a relieved smile. “I expect you to be here at eight tomorrow morning. Our first patient is scheduled for eight-thirty.”

She nodded, the rapid beating of her heart pounding up her neck and into her ears. She couldn’t keep the lie going, not if she’d have to face this man every day at work. It would eat away at her conscience. Might even interfere with her job performance. She couldn’t allow that to happen. For a millisecond she wished she’d never come back home, but James needed a chance at a better life. And she was hell-bent on giving it to him.

When she realized she’d been staring at her folded hands far too long, her gaze flitted upward to find Trevor’s perplexed expression. Oh, yeah, he was onto the fact something else was brewing.

She owed him the truth. Hadn’t he just taken a huge risk, bringing up their past, setting the record straight that he’d regretted their one time together?

Didn’t he deserve to know there were consequences? How on earth would he react?

Her pulse switched to a fluttery rhythm, vibrating all over her chest. This was the moment of truth, and she couldn’t let it pass.

“Trevor. Uh, about that night.” She looked straight ahead, unable to engage his eyes for now. Could he sense the dread in her voice?

James is the most wonderful gift in your life. There’s no room for shame over your son. Just tell him already!

“I mentioned I have a son, James. He’s twelve. Twelve years, nine months, to be exact.” Would he do the math instantaneously? She twisted an imaginary ring on her left hand, knowing she had to look Trevor in the eyes when she told him. Dreading it.

With every last nerve she could gather, she forced her gaze to his, praying he’d understand and not accuse her of lying. If he did, she’d have to quit the job before she ever started. “Well, since we’re laying everything out on the table today, I want you to know that …” She had to swallow first, because her throat seemed to have closed down.

His stare drilled into hers and her chest felt as if it would implode. She took a sip of air and just blurted it out.

“You’re the father.”